20. Raea
Raea
The rest of the day is a blur of military briefings and logistical nightmares. My parents are no longer shielding me, they are carving out my place as the future queen.
Every hour, the reports grow bleaker. More refugees pour in from Ateria and Mori, their eyes hollow with the same fear that keeps my magic simmering beneath my skin.
We’ve been asked to absorb the population of Ista—planets are falling, and we are simply rearranging the pieces before the board is wiped clean.
There is no escaping the horrors that are coming.
A shiver skates down my spine, and I clamp my hand down around the necklace from Ryker. He left in such a rush this morning, I didn’t get to say a proper goodbye—though I don’t think I’d ever feel like a goodbye was enough.
My father orders all hands-on deck, helping with refugees and preparing them for what is coming. We don’t know how to fight. That’s the one thing I wish I had learned from the prophecy book. How are we supposed to win without knowing what the hell we’ll be fighting?
Ryker took the prophecy book, but I pulled every ancient tome and every article in the system’s archives about the Veil, the gods, Sgya, and folklore.
I figure there has to be something, but with each book I’ve pulled, I’m only left with more questions than answers.
Surely the gods would have known that we wouldn’t know how to fight.
I wonder if there is a way to communicate with them. I wonder if I need to go back to Sgya.
It’s in an older tome on Caelestis that I find the most answers.
There’s mention of powers strong enough to change the tides of war.
I don’t even think the original empire had such abilities.
I keep reading and learn that Sgya calls to those who need the gods.
You can’t leave unless it’s the will of the gods that you do, but only when the time is right.
It gives me hope for Ryker’s father—if that’s where he still is.
My eyes burn, and I realize the sun is already setting on the horizon when I stand.
That evening, I find my mother in my chambers. She’s speaking with Mera and Julianna, the seamstress who creates all my gowns. In front of them are sketches of several dresses, outfits, and gods…
“What is that?” I screech as blood drains from my face.
The three of them look back at me, amused. As if somehow, I'm the amusing thing and not that sketch.
"Raea, how much do you know about the Bonding phase?" my mother asks.
"Nothing. I know nothing because I left school and was never taught.” I start to feel the panic rising. I am twenty-two, and I will soon have a husband, a kingdom, and a war to win.
"The Ceremony is only the first part, my dear. Normally, a Lumos Bond needs...encouragement. Since we don’t quite know what this Bond is, I suppose we should treat it the same."
“Encouragement?” I ask in a high-pitched voice that is definitely not my own.
Mera and Julianna keep going over the sketches while my mother sits in front of me.
"In the month that follows a Ceremony, well..." She begins fanning herself. "I never thought I’d be the one to explain this. You and Anders will need to consummate. It’s best that you two stay...elsewhere for a while."
I feel embarrassed for her. Is she saying what I think she’s saying? "Mother," I start. "So like a lot of sex? Do we have control of ourselves, or is this like a hey, I can finally deal with all my pent-up emotion I’ve been shoving down?"
Mera and Julianna snicker, and my mother’s head whips their way before returning to mine. "Oh, what the hell."
I startle—my mother has never cursed in front of me.
"Yes. There’s sex. Lots of it. You will be in control, but your body...
that’s a different story. You will be extremely needy for the better part of a month.
It's supposed to nurture the Lumos magic, so I can only imagine what it will do for the Aethermark." She steps away. “There, I said it. It’s completely normal for the Bonding Ceremony. Why do you think they all leave? Why do you think the wedding is a month after? It’s unavoidable, really.”
“I don’t know. Because they’re traveling or doing…things. How was I supposed to know they were just having sex the whole time?”
Everyone chuckles, including me. This feels ridiculous. Does Ryker know this? Do Kellan and Ciara? Surely I can’t be the only one without this information.
"Now you understand these." My mother holds up sketches of underwear that aren’t quite much of anything other than lace that covers the wrong parts of the body.
"Gods." I drop my head in my palms. "What if I'm no good at it?"
"Oh dear, somehow, it all just makes sense. You'll see. With what you both are facing, I’d say you should have a lot of…connection while you still can.”
Bury me now.
I let out a long groan before leaning over the table of sketches, noting the gowns for the balls, my wedding gown, my Bonding gown, and a few others I assume are for coronation and such.
“Will you have time for all of these?” I ask Julianna.
“Yes, Your Highness. I will have a large team on this to complete them before the Bonding Ceremony. Not to worry.”
I nod and grab my book. “I’ll be in the bath should you need to share any more humiliating information.” I curtsy toward my mother and leave.
Tate’s transport lands, and Ciara and I rush out of the palace to find him walking toward us with a huge grin on his face. I’ve missed his goofy self. Hopefully, he can brighten the mood around here.
“What? They didn’t roll out the royal carpets and fanfare for me? C’mon, I thought I was special after all. I mean, I have been summoned to this—” He looks up, and up, and up, at the palace behind me. “Could you have built it any larger?” he asks, scrunching his nose.
Ciara and I burst into laughter and then throw our arms around him.
He wraps us in a hug. “How’s our soon-to-be queen and her overly-protective prince?”
“You have such a way with your words,” I tease. “Ryker is home, doing…things. I leave tomorrow morning for a few days, but I’ll be back before the end of the week, and I will be here until my Bonding Ceremony.”
“Was he just so irresistible you had to rush off and marry him?” Tate asks as we continue into the palace. His arms are draped over our shoulders, and for the first time since I left school, I feel like I can breathe knowing he’s safe.
“Yes. That and the fact that the fate of our system hinges on my Bond.”
“And the fact that the prophecy is headed our way whether we’re prepared or not,” Ciara adds.
“What am I missing?” Tate’s head swivels toward me so fast I think it might come off.
“Nothing.” I cringe. “Just, we found out some information. Our Bond doesn’t like when we aren’t together. We have to find a way to Auralan.”
“I swear, I leave you both for two weeks and already it's more exciting than eight months at school.”
We all laugh and stay huddled with Tate between us as we take him up to his rooms. The three of us talk while he unpacks.
Thirik has four planets along the Veil beyond the asteroid zone.
Navigating through them isn’t hard, but if they need to evacuate, well, that’s a lot of really slow transports.
King Urik has already begun preparations to bring essential personnel into the inner planets of Trea and Brinvik.
The reality is that Thirik is essential for our system’s food.
Their planets raise animals that supply the majority of our meat.
Treon is good for hunting animals, but they’re wild, and we don’t have very many empty fields of grazing animals. Mori has a beast they hunt locally, but with Mori being evacuated, we are in need of Thirik’s food more than ever. I guess that’s why my father sent part of our Terra quadrant there.
Ciara and Tate come with me to my fitting for my wedding dress, my Ceremony gown, and the ball gown for the night before. I also have a few other pieces we need to finalize for the week.
When we enter Julianna’s rooms, the scent of lavender oil hits me at the same time a stream of light blinds me. The wall of windows is currently open, filling the room with intense sunlight. Julianna looks up and hurries to draw the sheer curtains that soften the glare.
It feels horrible to be measured for multiple expensive gowns, knowing that people are leaving the safety of their homes and being shuffled around the kingdom to safehouses, converted storage rooms, tents, wherever we can place them.
This is the job of a princess, though. I need to be the face of a strong, united kingdom.
I need to give people hope. I need to remind them of what they’re fighting for.
“Well, let’s get started. We have lots to do.” She pulls the first gown—my Ceremony gown—from the rack. I can’t help the way tears flood my eyes.
Tate snorts, and when I look to where he’s lounging on the chaise, Ciara is wiping her eyes too. He mutters something about us being ridiculous before Julianna pulls the partition closed for me to change.
Once I’m done, she opens it up and begins pinning my dress. Dozens of pins threaten to poke me from every angle, but I can’t draw my gaze away from the shimmering fabric that looks like strands of starlight silk. It’s breathtaking despite being impossible to breathe in.
Julianna yanks the silk tighter, and for a second, my airways completely close. Between the Nakata corset and the starlight silk, I am encased in a cage of my own making.
“Why,” I wheeze, catching Tate’s amused eye, “does saving the system require literal suffocation?”
Julianna hums, oblivious, adding more pins that jab into my hip like reminders of the forty suitors I’m about to face.
I look up to my friends, where Ciara is stifling her laughter by looking at the ceiling, and Tate, whose boot is now kicked up on the back of the chaise, and is stuffing his face with candied figs.
Without looking my way, he says, “Because looking fashionable is definitely more important than your ability to live. Everyone knows that. Nobody cares if you’re actually breathing, just whether the gown you’re wearing is impressive enough.”
Ciara crosses her arms, rolling her eyes, clearly unimpressed. “You’re here to be supportive.”
Tate grins. “I am. I’m supporting her morale.” He gestures to me with the half-eaten fig. “If she passes out, at least she’ll look fabulous doing it.”
I glare at him, but the warmth in my chest is real. Between the impending war and the humiliating sex talks, his charm is the only thing keeping me grounded. “If I die in this dress, I’m haunting you first.”
“Worth it,” he says cheerfully, throwing his head back as he lowers the fig into his mouth. Then, with a mouthful, he says, “At least you’d make the afterlife less boring.”
Julianna tugs on the gown, catching my attention. “Your Highness, if you could just…stop moving.”
I grit my teeth as another pin jabs my hip.
Ciara sighs, standing in front of me and fixing the bodice that is suspiciously close to moving and exposing my breast. “Hold still, or you’ll bleed, and Tate will make another joke about your death that I’ll have to hit him for.”
Tate gasps, placing a hand on his chest. “You wound me.”
I fight a smile, remaining as still as possible so I’m not stabbed again.
“Not yet, but the day is still young,” Ciara mutters.
Tate winks at me over his shoulder. “You two are terrible for my self-esteem.”
Ciara spins in front of me to face Tate. “Tate, you don’t have self-esteem.” She strides forward, grabbing one of the figs for herself. “What you have is an overinflated sense of charm.”
This time, I can’t help the laugh that bursts out of me.
Juliana gasps behind me in surprise.
Warmth settles in my chest when I look at my friends. “You two are the only reason I haven’t gone insane.”
Tate smirks, and I instantly brace myself. “Is the prince not keeping you satisfied?”
I groan, slapping a hand to my face. I walked into that one.
Julianna pins pieces of fabric around me, stretching here, bunching there.
Tate smirks. “And it’s my job to drive you insane.” He glances at Ciara. “Our job, but we do it with love.”
Ciara rolls her eyes, plopping down beside him as she reaches for her drink. “Speak for yourself.”
“See?” Tate exclaims, pointing a finger at her. “That’s genuine affection. She just hides it behind violence.”
“Keep talking,” Ciara warns, “and I’ll hide you behind violence.”
I snort, and Julianna sighs behind me. I mutter a quick apology. After another minute, Julianna rises, finally declaring me free to move.
Tate stands, bowing with a flare. “Well, Princess, if the gown doesn’t kill you, all the attention might.” His playful gaze sweeps me from head to toe, and he whistles. “I’m actually terrified Ryker might have to stash some bodies. I’ll help him find a closet.”
Ciara throws back the rest of her champagne as she stands. “That or he’ll dig their eyes out just for looking. Damn, you look hot.”
Julianna stands beside me, assessing her work with a nod, then moves to get the partition.
“I’m hungry,” Tate whines. “Can we get more snacks before the next crisis?”
Looking at Tate as a lifeline, I nod. “Snacks are good. Alcohol is better.” Because in two weeks, life will be forever changed.
Tate throws an arm over Ciara’s before I’m sealed off from their view. While Julianna moves to help me from the gown without loss of life, I hear Tate muttering something about alcohol being the true key to diplomacy.
I look into the full-length mirror, and for a moment, I don't recognize the girl staring back. I am marrying Ryker—the only man whose heart beats within mine—but to the rest of the system, this is a Lumos Ceremony. We have to lie to our friends, our courts, and the crowns alike.