Chapter Fifteen JACKIE
Chapter Fifteen
JACKIE
Adam paces the room in tight, erratic loops, raking a hand through his hair, muttering under his breath. Without sparing me another glance, he bolts for the hallway door. The slam rattles the frames on the wall and my heart along with them.
I just saved his annoyingly handsome face from becoming bear chow, and he storms off like I insulted his mother’s cooking.
The adrenaline ebbs, leaving me trembling and boneless on the floor. I’m slowly melting on the hard surface when the door bangs open again. Adam storms back in and crouches in front of me, his expression a hailstorm of emotions, though his voice is soft.
“Are you OK?”
All of a sudden, I’m so tired. All I manage is a shrug, staring at my hands in my lap. It was a monumentally stupid thing to do. But I can’t take any more scolding from him.
I bite down hard on my quivering lip until it hurts. Tears gather, warm and stinging. Apparently, I’m still ready to do the most foolish things for this man. Nothing has changed.
“Come here.”
His soothing voice is followed by strong arms wrapping around me. It’s like coming home. I don’t second-guess it and hug him back, burying my face in the crook of his neck.
My chest constricts, but I can’t tell if it’s joy or grief. They’re impossible to separate.
The worn cotton of his T-shirt is warm and smells like pine, but it’s the steady weight of his embrace that undoes me. I’ve missed his hugs so much I’m about to start bawling.
“I don’t know if I should kill or kiss you,” he says, cheek resting against my forehead while rubbing circles on my back. It’s soothing, but I get the feeling it also helps him calm down.
My voice wobbles, toeing the line between fear and amusement. “Killing me would be frowned upon by my guards.”
“I can take Patrick in an obstacle race.”
Like when Carter ended up in the hospital, Adam is by my side whenever I need him the most, ignoring the rift between us. I know it in my gut that he’s not lingering in Silver Lake Falls for the fresh air.
I want to trust him more than anything. To believe the whispered promises were real. Most of all, I wish Blanca had never told me anything about that night.
As always, it serves as a reminder. It’s why I can’t lean on him too much. All I want is to climb into Adam’s lap and let him ease my fear with his touch. But instead, I press my palms to his chest and push back gently.
Even with the space I put between our bodies, we’re still breathing the same air, locked into a wordless conversation I don’t know how to decipher.
“Better?” His voice is low and raspy, making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.
I muster a small nod, the steady rhythm of his heart strong under my palms.
“Please don’t scare me like that again.” His hands cover mine, pressing them harder to his chest, as if he needs the contact. “I’m already on edge after the bomb and the break-in. I couldn’t—”
The door bursts open again. Carter stumbles in, slightly disheveled and still wearing his pajamas, with Eliza hot on his heels.
Their sudden entrance slices through this stolen moment like a frigid wind.
She’s even paler than usual, shrieking, “You let me sleep with a bear in my back yard?!”
“One of you is going to send me to an early grave,” Carter groans, his voice gruff with sleep. “The guard made it seem like we were under attack.”
“Out of respect for my deceased ego, could we please not make such a big deal out of this?” Adam says, shaking his head, but he sounds more rattled than he wants to let on. He doesn’t let go of me or jump at the chance to step away.
My ego, on the other hand, seems to have taken the day off. For once, I don’t pull away either. I let him comfort me a little longer, telling myself it doesn’t mean anything. Surely facing down a wild animal counts as an extenuating circumstance, right?
The smooth wood of the banister digs into my arms as I type on my phone, catching up with Michelle. It’s such a crisp and clear morning, too lovely to waste cooped up inside my room while I work for a bit.
I’m not exactly hiding out here on the balcony, but it does lower the chances of running into my brother’s scowl. One that hasn’t eased since the bear debacle.
MICHELLE: Weather here is horrible. Send me some nature pics to cheer me up.
I straighten, snapping a photo of the backyard, with the lake and the mountains in the background. It looks like a postcard.
MICHELLE: I really need to come and visit. ??
I hesitate. I care about her more than I ever expected, but this is my brother’s place. His and Eliza’s safe haven, and they both value their privacy. I can’t bring Michelle here.
JACKIE: We’ll do a “team building” weekend in town once all of this is over.
The door to the other bedroom opens. Adam steps out in sweatpants and all his bare-chested glory. The way he looks more solid now than after graduation is unfair.
His abdomen muscles bunch as he sweeps a hand through his morning hair that sticks up in every direction, and I fight the dryness in my mouth, taking a second too long to look away.
“You can come closer if you want to ogle me this early in the morning,” he teases.
“Your morning breath is classified as a biohazard. No thanks.”
He laughs it off and drops into the chair at the small round table between our doors. I’ve never seen this man react to an insult. They just roll off him.
I grip the banister tighter, my gaze following one of the guards making his rounds. It’s like living in a gilded prison.
“I’m sorry for yelling at you yesterday,” Adam says suddenly.
“I’m not plotting your murder, relax.” I wave him off. “It was kind of extreme, I admit. Even for me.”
“What I said was still true, even if I yelled it.” He pauses for a beat, tapping the surface of the table. “You’re my best friend’s sister. I feel responsible for you.”
Ouch.
“Next time, please let me perish in whatever stupid mess I get myself into. I couldn’t face Carter if you got hurt because of me.”
I want to point out that he’s already hurt me, but the best friend’s sister stamp scrambles my brain and twists my insides in a knot.
I peer at him over my shoulder. “What’s happening right now?”
“This,” he says, gesturing with his hands, “is me being mature and open with you.” A lazy smirk lifts the corner of his mouth. “New approach. What do you think?”
“I’m not sure yet.”
“I’ll give you time to adjust.”
Nails drumming on the polished wood, I watch him more closely. “What’s the catch?”
“Always so calculated,” Adam tuts. “No ulterior motive. I just want to clear the air before I fly out to see my parents.”
“You’re leaving?” My voice pitches higher before I can control the distress slipping through.
“Curb your enthusiasm,” he says dryly. “I’ll only be gone a week. I promised my folks I wouldn’t postpone another visit. And besides,” he continues, tongue in cheek, “you’ve got Sir William to keep you company. And your delightful friend.”
Not after what I heard her tell Adam. I knew she looked down on him, but the way she spoke to him and what she said… were unacceptable. She crossed a line this time. Even if her intentions were born out of a misguided sense of protection.
Not to mention, the whole circus at the festival left a sour taste in my mouth. I didn’t think Will had that petty streak in him. At least Adam doesn’t cloak his competitiveness in fake politeness.
“They’ll leave soon. And, to be honest, I could use a break from them. And from Carter.” I sigh. “Maybe I’ll talk to Logan and Derrick. See what my options are for a short trip. I’ve heard Iceland is nice.”
“Is that so?” His tone borders on disbelief.
I exhale sharply through my nose. “Don’t act so surprised. I was never one for Carter’s overbearing brand of care. I just accepted it because…you know why. How we grew up.”
The wind whooshes beneath the edge of the roof, carrying up the damp scent of earth from the edge of the lake. To my annoyance, I’ve grown quite fond of this feeling of tranquility. This calm that’s seeped into me, unnoticed, and settled under my skin over the past couple of months.
“My parents have been asking about you,” Adam says.
I look back at him, and the way he’s watching me capsizes something in my chest. “You can tell them I’m alive. And relatively well.”
Adam hesitates, like he’s weighing up whether to keep going. “They’re not happy about what’s been in the news. They worry about you. I was thinking—”
“That’s a first.” I play it unaffected, but my words lack any real edge. He smiles again, sending me into near panic mode.
“A change of scenery might do you good. At least pull you out of wrestling bears empty-handed.”
“You’re not actually suggesting I visit your parents.”
“No, of course not,” he says quickly. “What I’m saying is we should visit my parents.”
On the list of unlikely things Adam could have said, this suggestion is a solid top three. I stare blankly at him.
“Don’t act so surprised. Nobody would know where you are, and you’re losing your mind stuck here.”
How does this man still read me so easily? I kept my distance for so long, but a few weeks forced together, and he’s able to figure out exactly what I need.
Adam crosses his arms over his wide chest, and my train of thought is derailed with ridiculous ease.
“Do you have a problem with my parents?”
“What? No, they’re the sweetest.”
“Then it’s the idea of going somewhere with me? Afraid you won’t be able to keep your hands to yourself?”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” I snap at him, way too quickly. Because, yes, obviously, that might be an issue. “I just haven’t spoken to your mom since…”
His mom always wanted to chat when Adam called her while we were together.
He nods in understanding. “Don’t worry about it. She won’t push for details.”
In theory, it makes sense. Carter will force the security team down my throat, and I’d be safe in Adam’s small hometown. Plus, it would give my brother and Eliza back some privacy. I’ve noticed his grumpiness spike with all the people roaming through his house, disrupting his domestic bliss.
Adam’s still waiting patiently for my answer, slumped in his chair, a gleam of challenge lighting his emerald eyes.
“That’s very kind of you,” I say in the most diplomatic tone I can muster, though agreeing feels like playing with fire. “It might be nice to take a breather.”
His grin is so bright, my heart stutters. “Awesome, I’ll tell them I’m bringing a friend. Can’t wait to see their faces when they realize it’s you.”
My thoughts snag on the word. “Is that what we are, Adam? Friends?”
The question catches him off guard. His gaze sharpens, so intense it makes me wonder what the hell possessed me to ask him that.
“Would that be the worst thing?”
The label sits uncomfortably on my chest. How am I supposed to look at him as just a friend when I can’t forget what it felt like to love him?