Chapter 31 Oak
Oak
“You don’t think he. . . ?” Her voice trails off, horror filling the absence.
I grit my teeth, my molars grinding to the point where they ache. Fury hardens my veins like ice.
My hold around her body becomes impossibly tight. She doesn’t wince nor does she complain. As if this woman hasn’t already proved she’s been made for me, she burrows herself deeper, getting as close to me as she can get.
“I think Steven will do what ever it takes to keep you under his thumb,” my answer is vague but in reality, if one is to dive deeper they can see the hidden meaning.
Grace stares up at me horrified. On a breath that sounds haunted she asks, “You really think he gave her the drugs?”
“Think about it, Grace,” I say to her lowly, “do you really think that would be out of character for him?”
She closes her eyes in a moment of defeat. When she reopens them I see the pain swirling in the blue depths of them but I also see the disappointment and the disgust. “How can anyone do such a thing?”
“Not all men are good.”
“I know that,” she replies torn. Her heart wants her to believe one thing while her mind is telling her another.
Logic vs emotion. A war that will never be won.
“I’ve always believed that our mistakes don’t define us.
That we as humans can grow and better ourselves.
But this. . .” Her voice trails off again.
It’s as if she’s trying to understand the failure of humanity.
Unfortunately I’ve seen it too many fucking times. “This can’t be redeemed, Oak.”
“No, it can’t,” I agree with her and I know it breaks her heart to hear it. “Redemption isn’t for everyone. He’ll never be one of the good ones, Grace, but you already know that.”
She swallows. “I know,” she repeats, this time heavy-heartedly.
Her eyes glisten like diamonds and as beautiful as they may be I hate seeing them shimmer.
“You think living all my life in Hollows Point I would be used to seeing the failures of humanity. And it’s not like he was ever good but this.
. .” Closing her eyes a single tear drop falls.
I collect it with my thumb before it continues it’s descent down her cheek.
“I can’t help but feel like it’s my fault. ”
Pinching her chin between my pointer finger and thumb I force her to look up at me. Her eyes are welled with unshed tears and I can see the blame in them. It’s something I won’t allow. I’ve let it destroy me; I’ll be damned if I let it destroy her.
With a voice that’s hard as steel I tell her, “You are not to blame.”
“But-”
I pinch her chin harder, knowing the bite of pain will reach her even if my voice can’t. “You aren’t. And if I hear you blame yourself one more time your ass will be so red that you won’t be able to sit for days.”
Her pupils dilate as she inhales a sharp breath. “Okay.” Her voice is huskier. And I’m grateful my little threat has distracted her.
“Good girl,” I praise her before planting a hard kiss on her lips.
Releasing her chin but not releasing her from my hold I keep one arm wrapped around her. Inside my cut I pull out my phone and call Pax.
He answers on the first ring. “How’s Grace doing?”
I glance down at her. Her head is nestled below my chest, her body more relaxed against my own. “She’s strong,” I tell Pax proudly, “and she has us and the rest of the club to support her.”
“She’s family, we have her back no questions asked,” he says, voicing his support.
“I need to know,” I ask him lowly, cutting straight to business, “did you find anything on him?”
Pax blows out a breath and I can’t tell whether if it’s good or bad. “I found some things, yeah.”
“Like what?”
He blows out another breath and I know what he’s found he doesn’t like. “I had to dig pretty deep. Whoever this fucker knows he had them do a deep cleaning to get rid of shit.”
“What did you find?”
“Two other complaints while working as a social worker. Both females, one in her mid-twenties, the other in her early thirties.”
“And?”
“And the complaints were dropped before they could even be rightfully heard.” Pax sounds both pissed off and disheartened.
My jaw ticks. “Why do I have a feeling you’re holding something else back?”
“Because I’m afraid you might just hunt down the man and kill him.”
No need for hunting when he’s already here. “What is it, Pax?” I bite out.
“You know how I have a knack with technology,” he begins and I know it’s not to boast but to stall.
I take a breath. “Which is why I had you dig into him. What are you getting at here, Pax?”
“You just can’t fucking kill him,” he warns me.
“Pax,” I say his name lowly, “I can kill him if I fucking please. You know this. I know this. We all fucking know it. And you and I both know Snake will help me.”
“Fuck, Oak.” Pax sucks in a breath. “Remind me to never fuck with you,” he laughs but it’s more of shock than humor. “Not what I meant, by the way. The feds are watching you closely. They already want you for Townsend. Add this and you’re definitely going to be behind bars.”
“If I’m caught.”
“Do you really want to chance it? Think about Grace. She’s going through enough right now she doesn’t need to worry about you.”
I glance down at Grace whose eyes are already on mine. And unlike before where they were filled with despair and hardened with disappointment, they’re soft. She’s staring up at me with the one emotion I haven’t been ready to hear but now I’m longing for it.
“You’re right,” I admit to him. As much as I want to kill Steven I can’t.
Grace then raises up on the tip of her toes with her head tilted back. Meeting her the rest of the way I kiss her softly on the lips. She kisses me back, our breath mingling with one another’s as her tongue dances with mine.
As the kiss comes to an end she places one last one on my opened mouth before gently removing herself from my hold. She then stands on the side of her mother’s bed and takes her frail hand in hers.
God, the heart this woman has is tenacious.
“Can I hear that again?” Pax jokes on the line and I refrain from rolling my eyes. “Oak admitting someone else is right is a rarity.”
“Because I’m hardly wrong.” I’m not saying it to be arrogant, it’s the truth.
He expels a long breath and with it I know what comes out of his mouth next I’m not going to like.
“He has pictures of her, Oak.” The blood rushing in my veins immediately turns to ice.
I can hear my heart pounding viciously in my ears.
The need to hunt him down and kill him is strong.
But I can’t. Not yet. “Pictures of her dropping Connor off at school. Pictures of her going to class. Pictures of her at the trailer. And he has fucking videos.”
“Of?” My voice is lethally calm. Pax swears under his breath. He knows as well as I do what’s going to happen. And there isn’t no stopping me.
“He has videos of her at the strip club. Videos of her when she was performing.”
Threatening her with the custody of Connor had already sealed his fate with me. But having pictures and videos of my woman to pleasure himself with? That has just guaranteed him a slow and torturous death.
“Oak,” Pax says my name tentatively, “you’re being real quiet.”
Despite the rage consuming me inside my voice comes out calm. Too fucking calm. “I’m thinking of all the ways I can torture him. How long I can make it last until he’s dead. I’m thinking weeks. Starting with severing each of his fingers.”
He sucks in a shaky breath. “You and Snake are fucking something else.”
“You hacked his phone?”
“Yeah and with the cloud everything is just too easy.” I imagine it is for him. Pax’s hacking skills are nothing short of impressive, he’s quite the master at it.
“Can you save it?”
I can practically see the smile from Pax on the other end of the phone. “I already have. There’s just one problem.”
Of course. Because nothing can just come easy. “That is?”
“None of this can be used in a case against him. The lawyer Nico provided can’t present this without being questioned how he got a hold of it.”
I had figured as much. To be honest I’m not worried about the legality of it all. “What I have in mind I don’t need the side of the law.”
“You promised you wouldn’t kill him.”
“I’m not going to kill him,” I appease him. Yet. “I’m going to do some good old fashioned blackmailing.”
“You think that’s going to work?”
“Would you rather have me killing him, Pax?”
“Honestly, if the feds weren’t on your dick I’d say go for it. Men like him should be put down.” For Pax being the pacifist amongst us brothers it’s always a little jarring to hear him advocate violence.
“Coming to join the side of violence, brother?”
“There are some men who deserve it. Not all but some.” He compromises.
“Call me if anything more comes up.”
“Will do.”
Grace returns in my arms I lean down and place a soft kiss on the top of her head.
“Do you want more time with your mom or do you want to go?” I ask her.
Glancing over her shoulder she looks back at her mom whose condition hasn’t changed and most likely won’t in any short given time.
“Does it make me a horrible person to say I’ve seen enough for today and that I’ll come back tomorrow?” Her question brings me back to Connor’s. Both of them questioning their morale and humanity.
I shake my head. “No baby, it doesn’t.”
“Then I’m ready to go.”
Taking her hand in mine I lead her out of the hospital room. As soon as we enter the hallway i can see the brave front she’s been holding start to tumble down.
I can feel it, Grace is only minutes from falling apart.
And I’ll be there to catch her if she falls.
She’ll never have to pick up the pieces while I’m here.
Her hand holds onto mine with an intense grip. Taking a glance down at her I see the shimmers collecting into pools in her eyes.
I know we won’t be able to make it to the truck. The way her body is starting to tremble and the sniffling noises with quick pants of breath she’s seconds away from either having a breakdown or a panic attack.
Both of which I’m very familiar with.
We don’t make to the end of the hallway before I see a trail of tears begin to fall down her cheeks.
Keeping her hand still in mine I tuck her in my side. And despite our massive height difference it somehow works. Her curves against the hard planes of my body.
And even though I try to quicken my pace so that we can make it to the truck away from everyone before the panic attack takes hold it doesn’t work that way.
Because life doesn’t work that way.
And I know more than anyone panic attacks don’t wait.
Once we make it to the waiting room the panic attack hits.
Bursting right into action I kneel in front of her. Her sky blue eyes are wide and panicked. They stare straight ahead in a far off distance.
Pinching her chin between my fingers I force her gaze upon me. Her eyes meet mine but they don’t recognize me. Not yet.
“Baby, breathe for me,” I instruct in a tone that’s more commanding than soft.
She starts to breathe but it’s entirely wrong. It’s too quick and shallow. Not enough to get the proper amount of oxygen in her lungs. At the rate she is going she’ll pass out within the next minute.
I place her hands on my face, that way she can feel something that’s real. Something that can bring her back to me.
Not wanting to hurt her but needing her to snap out of it I pinch her chin harder. I see the bite of pain flash in her eyes before they finally see me.
Her lower lip quivers as she sucks in a long breath that shakes. “Oak,” my name is a whisper on her lips but to my ears it sounds like a shout.
I smile at her. One that’s soft and tender. “Yeah baby, it’s me.”
I see the signs of the panic attack waning. The sluggish form of her shoulders. Her pupils no longer pin points. Color returns to her cheeks and her chest rises and falls at an even pace.
My fingers run through her long sandy blonde hair in a soothing manner. Her eyes close, allowing herself to completely give over to my touch.
Seeing that she’s okay I come to a stand. Sensing the space between us she closes it, flushing her front to mine.
I keep my fingers combing through her hair and murmur softly to her.
“You’re good at this,” she muffles against me.
Looking down I raise a brow and stop running my fingers through her hair. “At finger combing your hair?” I know it’s not what she meant.
“You’re good at that, too.”
I hum softly. “I’ve suffered many of panic attacks. Had quite a few breakdowns. Over the years I’ve learned how to snap out of them.”
She tilts her head back then, her eyes gazing up at mine with sorrow etched in them. “I’m sorry.”
“It was none of your doing, Grace. Don’t be.”
Reaching up with her hand she caresses my face, her thumb swiping along my jawline. I in turn do the same. I cup her face with my hand and she leans into my touch.
“It’s only another battle for us,” she says.
“A battle we will win,” I tell her.
“You know,” a sad smile plays on her lips and I hate the sight of it, “my mom used to say to me I’ll fight and fight until I have nothing left. All this fighting, she said, and it will only end with me dead.”
“Do you honestly think that I’ll ever allow that to happen?”
She shakes her head though the sad smile remains, “No, I know you won’t.”
Holding her face tenderly I stare deeply and fiercely in her eyes. “You are the only peace I know, Grace. And if anyone takes that away from me I will unleash a war upon this earth that won’t end until all those responsible are dead.”
Her fingers clasp around my wrist and despite how strong she appears I feel the slight tremble in her fingertips. Her blue eyes stare into mine with shimmers but they burn brightly.
The eyes can tell you everything you need to know about a person. If you stare deep enough you can see more than just their heart, you can see their soul.
Grace has always seen mine.
So overwhelmed with the emotion, with it strangling my heart and choking me I finally go to tell her, “Grace I-”
“Grace,” her name coming from the sound of a familiar male voice has caused my confession of love to die on my lips and my spine to stiffen.
Turning my head that’s when I see him. The man who has been causing my woman’s life hell.
The man I’m going to fucking kill.