Kayla
My body is stiff, and I’m not sure if it’s from sleeping on the floor, or from the hike in the rain, or from the sex we had last night. I’m guessing all three.
My cheeks heat when I think about what we did last night, the way Jace made my body dance and how good he felt inside me.
It felt good to let him in, to share a part of my past that I don’t like to admit to.
It was easier in the darkness to be vulnerable, but in the light of day, I wonder if I shared too much.
Rain pelts the roof as I stretch in the sleeping bag. Jace is already up and dressed with his back to me as he rifles through his pack. Even through his thermal top, his muscles ripple. My core clenches, and I sit up in bed, wondering if he’s up for a repeat performance of last night.
“Morning.” My voice sounds husky, and as I sit up, I let the bedding fall off my shoulders. When Jace turns around, he’ll get a view of my bare shoulders with my hair falling over them and grazing my exposed breasts. I feel deliciously wanton and confident, and horny for him.
“You need to eat something this morning. My MRE packs all have meat in them, but I have a protein bar.”
All the heat drains out of me, and I pull the sleeping bag up to cover myself. He’s all business this morning, and I shouldn’t be disappointed, but I am.
“A protein bar is fine.”
He turns around, but he’s squinting at the protein bar packet. “I think they’re vegan, but you better check.”
“It’s fine.” I search for my top and find it discarded at the bottom of the sleeping bag. “I have nuts and a cupcake.”
He glances up, and his expression softens.
“Hey.” He crouches next to me and hands over the protein bar. “How you doing?”
A range of answers flits through my mind. I’m on a high from the sex last night, and not just the sex; Jace makes me feel safe and cared for, but this morning he seems a little off, and it shouldn’t affect me, but it does.
“I’m fine,” I say, because I’m a wimp and I don’t want to come across as needy when my body is itching to touch him, because I know what he can do to me and I want it all again.
His gaze roves over my bare shoulders and flicks to my lips. He hesitates, and his breathing is shallow, as if he’s remembering last night too. Is he remembering our bodies moving together, or is he remembering my late-night confession?
I hold my breath, waiting for his lips on mine, waiting for the reassurance that I didn’t share too much.
His gaze flicks to the window, away from me.
“I’m going to hike out a little to find signal. Stay here, have something to eat, and rest.”
He kisses the top of my forehead, a gentle but brotherly kiss and not at all the kind of kiss I want.
But I smile as he stands up, and then he slips out of the door and is gone.
My hand closes over the protein bar, and the wrapper crinkles in the sudden silence.
My body’s on fire and my heart’s beating a dance that means trouble. I opened up to Jace, I made myself vulnerable, and worst of all, I let myself want him. But I have no idea if he feels the same beyond the sex.
I let out a long sigh and concentrate on my breath. But the calm I’m seeking is a long time in coming.
Two hours later, I’m in lotus pose, focusing really heard on my breathing and reminding myself that there is no point in worrying about the things in life we can’t control. I had an amazing night of sex, and if that’s all we have, then I’m damn grateful for it.
Then Jace comes through the door, dripping from the rain with his dark layer of stubble thicker than it was yesterday.
He pulls off his wet coat, and his muscles dance as he strips to his t-shirt.
It’s hard to find calm when there’s a wet, muscular man dripping in front of me and I know what his lips taste like.
But something’s different. The mischievous Jace I’ve come to know over the past week, the guy who always has a wise crack to make, is gone. Jace seems withdrawn, more serious than I’ve seen him.
“Everything okay?” I take his wet coat and hang it on the hook by the door.
“I had to walk up the hill to get signal. But I managed to speak to Grant. I told him our situation, and he advised me to stay put if we can. They’re working to clear the road, but until the rain stops, it’s not safe to do so.”
“So we’ve got another night here?” My stomach flutters, and I will myself to keep calm.
“There are folks that need help more than us. We have shelter and food.” He grins, but it’s brief. “You’re stuck with me for another night, sweetheart.”
He pulls out another protein bar from his pack and hands it to me. I’ve eaten all the nut snacks I brought with me, and my stomach growls.
He rummages through his pack and pulls out a MRE. “It’s chicken, but it’s yours if you want it.”
He holds it out, but I shake my head. “If it was a matter of survival, then sure. But I can live on protein bars and dried fruit for another twenty-four hours. Some people live on a lot less.”
He tears open the pack and eats it cold, which can’t be nice.
I long to ask him what he’s thinking, but I don’t dare to go there. Instead, we eat in silence. Once our meager meals are finished, I pull the cupcake box out of my pack. It’s squashed, but the cupcake inside it survived.
“You want dessert?”
He gives me a half-smile. “I’m honored you’re willing to share your cupcake with me.”
I break it in half and hand him some, then bite into my half. The cupcake is fluffy and the chocolate topping is gooey.
“Hmm, this is good.” Jace nods appreciatively. “For a vegan cake,” he adds with a grin.
I slap him playfully on the shoulder.
But his smile disappears too soon. He finishes his cupcake, and I feel like there’s something he wants to say.
I’m sitting on the bedroll, and he sits down next to me and lets out a long sigh. “When did you really realize it was time to leave your corporate job?”
He looks the most serious I’ve ever seen him.
“I told you last night, when I was so stressed that I ended up in hospital.”
“It took something that serious, huh?”
“Yeah. I wasn’t really in tune with what was happening around me. I was so far in denial that it took a health scare for me to see what needed to change.”
“Huh.” He shakes the crumbs off his fingers. “I’ve been ignoring what the doctors have said about my injury.”
I turn to him, and he’s staring straight ahead.
“When you become an Army Ranger, the selection and training is so intense that when you finish, you believe you’re invincible.
That nothing will stop you. But I realized last night that the doctors might be right.
I might never serve again. And without the military, I’m nothing.
I have no purpose, and that scares the shit out of me. ”
He’s staring straight ahead, and I take the packet from his hands and clasp them in mine. I kneel before him so he has no choice but to look me in the eye.
“Maybe there’s some other purpose for you.”
He snorts. “Don’t give me that fate bullshit. Our choices in life determine our fate.”
“Then maybe it’s time to make a different choice.”
He stares at me for a long moment, and for the first time, I see the vulnerable side of Jace. Behind the cockiness and the smart remarks is a man who has lost his purpose. And I ache for him.
I want to ease that ache, if only for a little while.
Keeping my gaze on him, I lean forward and press my lips to his. He closes his eyes as he draws me to him, deepening the kiss. His hand snakes to the back of my neck, and he pulls me onto his lap.
“Right now…” I kiss his neck and whisper in his ear, “my purpose is to please you.”
“Fuck, sweetheart.” His voice is gruff, and he pulls my hips down so that I feel his hardness through my yoga pants. I straddle him and grind against him.
I want to make him forget his troubles for a little while. I want him to get lost in me, and more than anything I want to see the smile back on his face.
I pull my top off and shake my hair out over my bare shoulders. Jace’s gaze rakes over my breasts, and then his lips are on me. I lean back and enjoy the sensation of his mouth and hands running over my body.
We stand up and peel the clothes off each other, and when we’re both naked, I push him into the single chair in the hut.
The chair bumps up against the shelf in the kitchen corner, and I straddle him.
But I don’t sink onto him yet. Instead, I run my hands over my breasts, and one hand slides between my legs.
My body trembles as I touch myself, giving him a show.
When I’m turned on and dripping wet, I raise my hips and sink down onto his velvety cock, groaning as he fills me up. His mouth finds my breast, and it’s hot and wet, and he knows exactly what to do to make me squirm against him.
“Jace…” His name is on my lips, with the heat and pressure becoming too much. I was supposed to please him, but his wicked mouth on my nipples is too intense.
“You still think I’m a cocky asshole?” His breath tickles my sensitive skin, and one hand grips my hips as he rocks me against him.
“No…” I’m panting as he rocks me against him, and I grip the kitchen bench for purchase.
“Would an asshole do this?”
He presses his lips to the side of my nipple and blows. Cool air mingles with the heat of my skin, sending jolts of sensation straight to my core.
I cry out, and at that moment, Jace pulls back.
My eyes fly open. “What are you doing?”
His eyes are hooded, and there’s a flash of mischief in them. He holds my hips down on his cock, which is great, but I want him to rock me. I want the friction.
“Ask for what you want, Kayla.”
“You know what I want.” I move my hips, but he holds them firm in his hands.
He shakes his head slowly. “Ask for it.”
“Now you’re being an asshole.”
He chuckles, and as he does so, he leans forward, allowing his breath to skim my nipples.
My eyes flutter shut, and I moan as heat pulses through me.
“Say it, Kayla. Tell me what you want.”
A yearning tugs at my stomach, a yearning for him in more ways than just physical. But that’s not what he’s asking. I push it down and focus on the physical, on what I want right now.
“I want you to keep going.”
“Good girl.” He rewards me by moving my hips, and the instant friction has me gasping. “What else?”
I close my eyes and allow myself to live in the moment, to only think about what I want right now.
“I want you to suck my nipples hard.”
He complies, and I gasp as his wet mouth closes over me.
“Fuck, Jace… that feels good.”
“What else, Kayla? What else do you want?”
His voice has an edge, and his movements are slow and deliberate, as if he’s holding back.
“I want to come. I want to come hard all over your cock. Then I want you to fuck me again and again.”
“Fuck, Kayla.” He grits out the words and pulls me toward him, and then I’m over the edge and screaming his name as the orgasm slams through my body.
When my body finishes trembling, Jace slides his hands around my ass, and he lifts me as he stands up.
He stays inside me as he walks me to the opposite wall of the hut, carrying me as if I weigh nothing. I grip his arms to stay upright, and my legs wrap around his body. He’s my safe place, my anchor, and I never want to let go.
He pushes me up against the wall, and the rough wood makes me arch my back, and as I do, Jace thrusts in hard and goes deeper, making me cry his name.
The rhythm changes from slow and steady to rough and wild. He’s in charge now, and I cling on as he thrusts into me again and again until the pressure is too much and I come long and hard, and a moment later Jace comes too.
We’re both panting, and he kisses me gently as he sets me down on the floor. The smile is back on his face, and I’d do anything to keep it there.
“You know, sweetheart, I didn’t think anything was better than being out in the field. But being here with you feels pretty damn good.”
“I thought you didn’t have feelings.”
He kisses me gently on the lips, and his gaze finds mine. “I’m catching some for you.”
My stomach flutters, and the yearning I felt in the moment before I came is back in full force, followed immediately by anxiety clawing at me from the inside.
It’s dangerous to want something this much.
I’ve seen where it can lead. I’m an all-or-nothing person, and wanting Jace when he’s planning to leave is terrifying.
But I can’t help the little flip my stomach does when he kisses me gently on the lips.
“We need to refuel.” Jace reaches for our discarded meal. “And then I’m making you come at least a dozen more times.”
His mischievous smile is back, and I can’t help but smile back at him. I tell myself this is just a distraction; it can still just be sex. Besides, there’s nothing else to do when we have another night here.
We spend the rest of the day and night fucking, eating, and dozing until my body aches, and my mind finally finds a peace I don’t have to work for.