Chapter 9 #2
She pauses, and I swear she is so still I wonder if she is still breathing. “There was a time when I prayed for someone to see me, and if I can keep you from experiencing that, I will. Now shimmy out of that dress so I can grasp what I’m working with here. Can you sew?”
“Yes, I have always had to make my own clothes.”
“Can you use a sewing machine?”
“I can but prefer to do most things by hand.”
“Well, it appears we’re going to keep your fingers busy then.
Thankfully, we are close in height, so most of the dresses should be the right length, but you are slightly smaller in the bust area than I am.
We may need to take a few in, or the next option is to feed you more and leave them alone.
Either way, that is a problem for tomorrow; we need to focus on tonight. ”
“Victoria, I don’t know what to say. I’ve spent half my life hiding behind these plain dresses. I’m not sure I’ll even know how to walk in something half as nice as what you are wearing.”
“You are simply creating problems in your head where there are none. Now, let me examine this hair. Ahhh, it’s glorious! Look at all these beautiful locks; the weight alone must give you headaches.”
“On occasion, if it’s really hot out, but I can’t tell you how many have tried to get me to cut it, only for me to adamantly refuse as it’s my one vanity.”
“Oh, you have more going for you than this lovely mane you keep hidden from the world, sweet girl.” Somehow, she manages to move my chair around, then she takes her hand, placing it under my chin, moving my head back and forth so that she can look closer at my face.
“Your skin is an attractive olive color and it seems like your cheeks are naturally flushed, as are those rosy lips. I am almost jealous of your coloring, but it’s those eyes of yours that really catch everyone’s attention as they show the world your soul. ”
She spins my chair back around, and I barely stop myself from leaning away from her to see how this chair is moving on its own.
Once I am facing the mirror again, I watch as Victoria twirls my hair one way then another.
Glancing away from what her hands are doing, I look in the mirror at myself, wondering how she sees something I don’t.
“All I see are dark circles under my eyes and sunken cheeks.”
“It’s because we are our own worst judge and jury.
We only see the flaws; it’s just the way of things.
Women are molded from a young age into what is considered beautiful and what is not.
That itself is wrong because life is beautiful and a blessing that should not be wasted on petty things like appearance, since that’s the first thing to fade as the years stack up.
If the only attraction is a pretty face or body, then it’s destined to fail because when those wither away, then all you are left with is the person …
which most can’t deal with. But the ones who never notice their partner aging, who always see that young man or woman beneath the new wrinkles and the rounded bellies, those are the ones who are truly blessed.
Because that love is not measured in time, it’s measured in honesty, laughter and understanding. ”
I let her words sink in for a minute. “I can tell you and Tyberius are close. Were you always that way?”
“From the moment I found myself in his arms, he became my entire world. I was and still am a handful, but he has a way of helping me when I lose myself.”
“I can’t imagine you ever being lost; you seem so confident.”
“As a young woman, I was overly confident to the point that I was cruel. Then in the blink of an eye, my legs were swept out from under me and that event still haunts me to this day. You see beautiful clothes and poise that project self-assurance when I am in public, but I promise you, when I look in the mirror, I am as hard on myself as you are.”
Because I was listening to her so intently, I didn’t notice what she was doing with my hair. But all of a sudden, my features seem to have softened, and my hair hangs in beautiful ringlets around my neck, while the top has been pinned and swept up in a way that frames my face beautifully.
“How did you do that?”
“I will teach you, but not tonight. Come, let’s get you dressed. I can’t wait to see his face when he sees you.”
Leaning closer to the mirror, I turn my head from side to side before getting up and following her to where she has several dresses hanging.
“I probably should have had you take that dress off before I fixed your hair, but between the two of us, we should be able to get it off without messing you up too much. Let me see your shoes.”
I stick my foot out from under my skirt.
“Hmmm, we can try a few on, but I think all of mine might be too big. Either way, slip out of them before we get you in these stays, as it’s practically impossible to bend over and put them on afterward.
Give me a moment, you need fresh undergarments that won’t show under the fabric of the dress I plan on putting on you. ”
Victoria comes back moments later with her arms full. Some things she is holding like the stays, I’ve never worn before, as my simple work dresses never required anything underneath.
“Here are some thinner pantaloons and new stockings. They tie here.”
She holds out the dainty ribbons, showing me where they go, and I fight back the tears as I am completely overwhelmed by all of this.
“Now, no sad face young lady. Quit worrying about what things cost, or any of that nonsense. You are a beautiful girl, and you should have pretty things. I have enough for ten of me because my husband can’t say no.”
Victoria walks over to a shoe rack, pulling down a couple of pairs before placing them at my feet.
“See if you can slip those on?”
I can tell right away that there is no way I can wear them.
“It’s not ideal, but it’s common for women to wear something sturdier under their dresses when traveling, so yours should be fine, but that dress you still have on has me worried about the curls I just put in your hair.”
“Oh, it all unbuttons up the side. I will be able to step out of the outer part. My shift is the only thing I normally pull over my head.”
“Get to it then, as I need to find you one more thing. There is no way you can wear your full shift under any of these dresses I just pulled out, but you are in luck, as I have a few dozen others on hand.”
Six buttons later, I step out of my dress only to hold it up in front of me as I’m ashamed of the threadbare shift I’ve been wearing for years. When she sees me standing like that in the middle of the room, she stops, giving me an understanding smile.
“Jessica, I understand that I’m a stranger and you’ve probably never undressed in front of anyone in your life, but Honey, we have the same parts.
Look at it like this … the moment that dress hits the floor, you will be walking into a different life and a new you.
Like everything else, that first step is the hardest.”
How odd? Reggie just said that same thing to me earlier today. I make myself let the dress drop, only to instantly cross my arms, trying to hide myself.
“Here, put this on first so that you will be fully covered, then change your underthings so that you won’t be so self-conscious. I will turn around to give you some privacy but be careful with that hair. I worked hard on that masterpiece.”
I take the soft, shimmering material out of her hand, and she turns around. Gathering the bottom of my shift up, I carefully pull it over my head, but when I start to put the new one on, I have no idea how.
“Jessica, do you need help? It has ties on the side, the lace goes between your breasts, then the stays go over that. Step into it, then pull it up. Once it’s on, I will help you tie it in place.”
Stepping into it, I cover myself the best I can, but no matter how I turn it, I can’t figure it out. “I’m decent.”
Victoria turns around only to smile, “Look at all those natural curves, that man is going to swallow his tongue when he sees you. Come here and let me show you how all this works.”
What feels like hours later, she finally has me in a dark blue dress trimmed with black lace that I know costs more than I’ve ever made in my life. “Victoria, do you not have something … you know? A little less exquisite than this?”
“I used to wear this dress all the time, and it was a favorite, but it’s been hanging in that closet untouched for over a year now.
It seems like it was just waiting for you.
And no, you are not wearing less … this is all about more.
Now stop pulling and fidgeting and stand up straight so I can look at you. It’s missing something.”
She walks around me, once again bouncing her finger off her chin like she’s deep in thought.
“Silly me, of course it is, you have no jewelry on. Come here.”
She grabs my arm, gently pulling me along behind her. Before I realize what she is doing, she is holding up different pieces of jewelry against the dress, trying to match the color.
“Here we go, these will look beautiful.”
She motions for me to turn around so that she can put the necklace on me.
“Victoria, I can’t … what if I lose it?”
“Sweetness, you need to relax. I have enough jewelry in this car alone to fill an entire store. That’s the main reason we are on this train headed West. Long story short, Ty asked a local jeweler to make a piece he wanted designed for me for a special occasion.
When the man told him that it could not be done, well, nothing to do but for Ty to learn to make it himself.
He’s made most of these pieces for me in the last few years. ”
“Oh, then I really can’t wear this.”
“Of course, you can because I am sure I have another just like it somewhere. He always makes two of everything. Now stop fidgeting.” She grabs my shoulders, making me look straight at her.
“Even when you feel like you are ready to crawl out of your skin, one of your biggest girl powers is to show the exact opposite. Do you understand what I am saying?”
“I believe so, yes.”
“That’s my girl.”
After finding a pair of matching earrings, Victoria quickly twists them so they fit comfortably on my earlobes, then steps back. Grinning, she grabs my hand, twirling me around.
“Come, I think you need to see something.”
I gather the long skirts in my hand with a huge smile on my face as the expensive material swirls around my legs.
Walking up to a full-length mirror, I stop dead in my tracks.
The girl … no woman in the mirror looking back at me is a complete stranger.
I reach up, gently touching the mirror, amazed at what I’m seeing.
“Victoria, I don’t know what to say. Is this version of me real?”
“Ahhh, YES … that’s all you sweetness!”
“I’ve never even seen anything this nice on anyone. I can’t believe I’m wearing this.”
“Good, because this dress was guaranteed to be one of a kind. Are you ready to step out into the world?”
“What? NO … not at all! If anything, I am more terrified than I’ve ever been in my entire life.”
“The clothes don’t make the girl Jessica, that’s all on you.
If you go out there with your head down, they will eat you alive.
Right at this moment, you get to be that girl you always dreamed of, so enjoy it to the fullest. Head up, no slouching, drop those skirts or you will wrinkle them, hold your hands like this when standing still or walking, and follow me.
I am so excited I’m practically bouncing. ”
Instantly, some of my excitement is gone. “Are you going to tell your husband about me being the maid? Please don’t as I don’t want to embarrass Reggie.”
“I don’t keep any secrets from Ty, but if he does ask, I will tell him to keep it to himself.”
She is a couple of steps in front of me when I reach out, gently grabbing her arm. Instantly, I hear a deep growl from the back of the room when she goes still under my hand. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to touch you without permission. I was just going to … hug you.”
She turns slowly, but this is the first time I notice a forced smile on her face. “Oh dear, old ghosts pop up at the most random times. You did nothing wrong.” She holds her arms open, and I practically run into them, grasping her tight.
“Thanks for being my fairy godmother. I will never be able to repay you for your kindness.”
She leans back away from me, and I see tears in her eyes. “You just did, baby girl … you just did. Now go out there and make me proud.”