Chapter Twenty-Five
At the end of the week, Zennor had a call from Trev. He opened by telling her that Ginny and Kate had messaged him to thank him and Zennor for their help and to say they were fine. Trev had invited them for a complimentary cream tea at the hotel.
‘That’s nice. Kind of you too.’
‘It’s nothing,’ he said before adding that he’d rebooked the pianist for a regular slot at the St Piran’s. ‘I’d also like to meet up to chat about something else,’ he said. ‘Something that’s not business related.’
‘Where? Here at the office or at the hotel?’ she said warily.
‘I was actually thinking somewhere neutral where we can have a proper talk.’
The “chat” had morphed into a “proper talk”. Her skin prickled as her instincts were proved right.
‘There’s something I’ve needed to get off my chest for a long while,’ he added.
‘OK …’ She had to say her piece. ‘But before you do, do I have a choice of whether I want to hear it?’
‘Of course,’ he said. ‘There’s no pressure. You don’t have to listen but if you want to meet, drop me an email. You choose the location.’
She caught a breath, having expected him to insist she hear him out, but his softened response had taken her aback.
It was her decision entirely. She nodded. ‘OK, I’ll give it some thought.’
Zennor was fully aware, as was Trev, that having said he had “something to get off his chest”, she couldn’t not listen because she’d be wondering forever more what he had to say.
In the end, she asked him to meet her at the Minack Theatre a few days later, which she was visiting for work anyway.
Having watched a student theatre group rehearse Blithe Spirit, she made her way up the steep steps to the café.
Trev was standing at the top, hands on the railing, staring out on to the turquoise waters of Pedn Vounder, one of Cornwall’s most famous beaches.
‘Impressed?’ she asked, a little breathless after her climb from the stage.
‘Wow. This is way beyond what I expected.’
‘Surely you must have been here before?’
‘Actually, no. You forget that I moved here from Surrey. I’ve seen it on the TV, of course, and I’ve been hearing the guests endlessly drone on about it. Why did you choose here?’
‘I’ve got a client I needed to take a look at and it’s definitely neutral. I’m sorry if it’s dragged you all the way from the St Piran’s.’
‘I don’t mind. I’ve always wanted to see it. The view is sensational. Are we really in the UK and not the Caribbean?’ He swept his hand, indicating the white sand and myriad blues of the beach and sea below.
‘Oh, it’s real.’ Zennor sighed. ‘It feels realer than almost any place I know. Dad used to love bringing me here to take part in the shows. Mum and Dad both enjoyed it but Dad used to do a lot of the running about. It was such a drive from home that he stayed for hours to watch us.’
A couple of kids were chasing each other around the stone stage, playing at pirates, bringing back memories for Zennor.
‘I remember him telling me about it,’ Trev said. ‘It’s nice to see you smiling again.’
‘I have so many happy memories of those days with the youth theatre. It was a dream to perform on the stage down there with the waves crashing and the wind gusting. There’s something about the place that makes me feel free – as if I could take off and fly over that bay.’
Trev was silent and she wondered if he didn’t understand, but then he spoke. ‘I know how much the youth theatre meant to you and that, when we married, you drifted away from it. I think that may have been partly due to me. I’m sorry for taking you away from it.’
‘You didn’t. Not exactly. We were busy socialising and doing up the house and going on holidays – and it was hard to find the time.’
‘Yeah, well, I wish I’d encouraged you to keep up your hobbies more.’
Hobbies? He made it sound as if the theatre was a once-a-week spin class or the odd dabble at knitting.
‘I’m planning to do more to help the theatre school, actually. Kernow Entz should be more involved, both financially and with hands-on support.’
Trev looked surprised. ‘Wow,’ he said, although she wasn’t sure if he was genuinely impressed. It took a lot to impress Trev. She’d long ago decided not to even try.
‘Anyway, you didn’t want to meet up so we could admire the view and reminisce,’ she said firmly.
‘No.’ He glanced down at his shoes, scuffing a chip of granite with his foot.
‘Zennor, something has been on my conscience a long time. Well, since our wedding day. So, I had better launch right into this. I think that Matt might have got the wrong end of the stick about something he saw. Or thought he saw between me and the waitress at our wedding – and that’s why he kicked off so badly. ’
Zennor put her hand on the railing for support. ‘You said you were only talking. That nothing – physical – happened.’ She felt sick.
‘Nothing did, not from my point of view anyway, but she – the waitress – did try to kiss me. I’d gone out for a vape and she caught me unawares.
She was waiting tables in the bar, but not at the reception.
They’d called her in to cover, apparently …
and when she saw me, she kind of launched herself on me and I think Matt must have seen us. ’
Zennor curled the fingers of one hand to stop them from trembling. ‘So Matt was right.’
‘Absolutely not and that’s what I want to make clear,’ Trev said firmly.
‘Matt thought he’d seen me kissing her and jumped to conclusions.
It wasn’t like that. Even he admits he’d had a couple of drinks at that point.
He put two and two together and made fifty.
He wanted to see me kissing another woman because he was insanely jealous.
I don’t blame him.’ Trev tried a smile but Zennor felt ice in her veins.
‘Why – why are you telling me now?’ Her stomach turned over and over.
‘Because I’m trying to do the right thing here. I’ve told you that I have a different perspective on life – on the past and on the person I want to be – so it’s time to set the record straight … even if I’ve blown our chance at making a go of it again.’
‘I – didn’t know you wanted to.’ Zennor’s stomach churned. ‘Make a go of it, I mean.’
‘I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t dreamed about it. Even if it’s a long shot.’
‘So,’ Zennor said, summoning up all her composure, ‘there was nothing between you and this woman on our wedding day or while we were seeing each other? You didn’t encourage her? And, please, don’t even think of lying to me.’
He crossed his heart. ‘Nothing. She launched herself on me before I could stop her.’
Zennor snorted. ‘Oh, Trev. You’re a six-foot bloke. You make this girl sound like a – a Gladiator!’
He made the mistake of smiling again.
‘It’s not funny!’ Zennor was simmering with shock. ‘Just how well did you know her?’
‘We’d spent a couple of nights together, but it was over months before I ever met you.
I was horrified when she rushed over and grabbed me but what could I do?
’ His voice rose. ‘Push her off? She was young and upset. She didn’t want to accept it was over between us but I swear it was.
I tried to reason with her; I tried gently to tell her to leave me alone.
I held her to comfort her so she would calm down.
In a way, I don’t blame Matt for what he thought he saw. ’
‘But you shouted him down!’ Zennor said, and then lowered her voice, realising they were in public: ‘At the reception, I mean.’
‘Because he was wrong, and I wasn’t going to have a row with him when the situation was out of control. It was already humiliating enough. I’d have made it worse for everyone and most of all for you.’
She shook her head. ‘You swore you had no idea why he was accusing you.’
He hung his head and stared at the ground. ‘Now I wish – oh, how I wish – I’d told you why he might have got the wrong idea but I was a coward. I thought it was better – easier to keep things simple rather than fan the flames.’
She sighed in exasperation. ‘It wasn’t easier or better.’
He turned to face her and the backdrop behind her of an impossibly turquoise sea and dramatic jagged cliffs.
The beauty of the place and the feeling of freedom made her want to cry.
Or maybe it was the revelation that Matt – in his own way – had been right and that it somehow didn’t matter.
What mattered was Trev finally admitting it.
‘You’re right and now you know the worst of me,’ he murmured.
‘Do I? There’s nothing else you want to tell me? There was no one else while we were married?’
He groaned. ‘Christ, Zen. No way!’ He crossed himself. ‘On my mum’s memory. And I’m gutted that you even felt you had to ask.’
He reached for her but she moved away, trembling inside.
It was true that she’d never had any actual evidence that he’d seen other people while they’d been married.
He’d flirted with some – and women had flirted with him – but he’d given her no reason to believe he’d been having an affair.
Her doubts were all fuelled by Matt’s accusations at the wedding and his vague hints in the letter that he’d been trying to ‘do the right thing’.
‘If you can find it in your heart to forgive me for that one thing, it’s all I ask.’ Trev’s voice was quiet. ‘Please, can we wipe the slate clean and start again?’
‘I don’t know. I can understand it, but as for starting again, it’s too soon …’
‘Even as friends,’ he said. ‘If that’s what you want. God knows, it’s probably all I can ever ask of you.’
Friends? Zennor shook her head. Trev wasn’t the kind of man who had female friends. Colleagues, admirers … maybe.
‘Friends isn’t scary, is it?’ he went on. ‘Surely we can be that? I hate this continual tension between us. It’s why I’ve taken the biggest risk of my life and been so brutally honest.’
‘I—’ She couldn’t bring herself to say a flat no. She couldn’t be cruel and crush him. She had loved him once and still cared about him. It must have taken a ton of guts to admit the truth to her, even if that truth stung and had made her doubt him all over again.