Chapter 26 Weird
twenty-six
Weird
*GWENDOLYN*
When I came down from my high, I turned to Felix, a sudden twinge of anxiety surging through me.
I‘d like to be held after sex, I‘d like to cuddle, but my previous partners never did, even when I told them it’s important to me.
“Felix,” I say quietly. “Can we lie together for a while?” I pause. “It helps me stay grounded.”
Felix’s face lights up with his smile. “Of course. I had no intention of going anywhere.” He pulls me into his arms. “Why did you sound so anxious?”
“My ex didn’t like to cuddle,” I admit. “I told him it was important to me to make me come down from the endorphin rush, but he said I was too clingy and he didn’t like it.”
Felix stares at me. “What?” he exclaims. “Your ex is such a loser,” he spats. “Everything you tell me about him is bad. He sucks.”
“Yeah,” I say, blinking when realization hits me. It’s so cathartic to have someone else, my mate in particular, say it so clearly. “He really sucks!” I rest my hand on Felix’s chest, feeling his heartbeat. “But he isn’t important anymore.”
Felix smiles while keeping me in his arms. I can feel him so much more intensely now, his feelings, his presence, even his scent. Everything is stronger. It’s the first time in my life that I realize I am truly a hybrid. I wouldn’t be able to take up his scent if I weren’t half wolf.
I am so stupid. I allowed them all to feed into my insecurities, while in truth, nothing was wrong with me.
“What are you thinking?” Felix asks softly, while brushing my hair out of my face.
“That I am really lucky,” I say. “To be mated to you.”
He rubs the back of his head. I’ve noticed he always does that when he is embarrassed or bashful. “I am nothing special,” he says.
“You are to me.”
“The girls in school say that I am not deep,” he admits. “You know, a pretty face but not much behind it.”
I frown, feeling a surge of anger. A surprisingly strong one.
It seems like my wolf side is less than pleased that others badmouthed my mate.
“Their loss,” I say. “Obviously, they were the shallow ones. I think you are pretty amazing. You are so kind and generous, you accepted me immediately, and you didn’t hesitate to help me.
You only thought about me and what I need.
” I pause, hoping he won’t find me cringey. “You are the sun for me.”
Felix is silent. “Thank you,” he finally says, his voice hoarse.
“Felix, may I ask something?”
“Of course.”
I move my finger down his chest and to a scar on his stomach. “You were hurt once, weren’t you?”
“Oh, that!” He nods. “I haven’t told you about it yet.
Dario, Charlie and I once got abducted by someone from Charlie’s family.
It was two or three years ago, and it’s a crazy story.
The guy was some sort of vampire lord and thought Charlie was his daughter.
He wanted to keep his family line clean,” he pauses. “I swear, it’s the truth.”
I stare at him. “It sounds absolutely insane, but I know you would never make something like that up.”
“He had his spies set on Charlie, and she happened to hang out with Dario and me, which is why we got abducted too.”
He falls into silence.
“You don’t need to tell me more,” I say softly.
“It’s just… I haven’t told anyone before,” he admits.
“Not the details, at least. Dario and I kept it a secret, but I believe I can share it with my mate. We were kept in a dark cell, and to scare us further, they would take turns with Dario and me, dragging us to a dark, cold place and torture us there.”
I raise my head. Three years ago, they must have all been young teens. My heart sinks at the knowledge of what they went through.
“The scar happened later,” Felix continues. “We tried to escape. It didn’t go as planned, and Dario and I wanted to give Charlie an opening to run. During that fight, I got hurt.” He stays silent again before he continues. “I almost died,” he says to my shock.
His voice is hoarse again, like he struggles to talk.
“I was so scared,” he admits. “The darkness and the pain were so scary. My parents saved me. But I was severely hurt and didn’t have my lycan’s full power yet, so I did rehab and learned how to walk again.”
“Goddess,” I say quietly. I might have only known him for a couple of days, but I know he likes to be outside, he likes to be active, and he loves to be out in nature.
He is such a sunny person, yet someone almost took the sun away from him.
I wrap my arms tighter around him. “I am so sorry. No one will ever hurt you again!”
“I can defend myself better now,” Felix says. He sounds thoughtful, like he is trying to convince himself, too. “I have learned to fight, and I have trained a lot. My lycan is strong and has healed me. The scar is the only remainder of what happened.”
I rest my hand on it. “Thank you for sharing that with me. Even as a kid, you must have been so strong and brave. I think if I had someone like you in my school, as my classmate, as my friend back then, my life would have been so much happier.”
Felix shifts slightly so that he lies on his side, looking at me now. We are so close that our noses are almost touching. “Thank you for allowing me to mark you.” He pauses, looking at me, then suddenly I can feel something pushing against my mind.
No way!
I am also very thankful and happy that you are my mate, he links me.
We can mind link!?
Of course. We are mates, he says. And I marked you.
I didn’t even know I could do that, I admit.
He blinks at me. Gwen, baby, you were a pack member. Did no one ever link you? Even actual humans who are members of a pack can learn how to mind link. For you, as a hybrid, it obviously comes naturally.
I stare at him, my chest tightening in anger when I realize that no one ever tried to mind link me. I swear, if I ever see them again, I will give them a piece of my mind!
Me too, Felix says darkly.
The grumpy meowing of my nameless Pallas’s cat suddenly startles both of us. There is a scratching against the door, and then another even grumpier meow. Felix throws his head back and laughs. “The noises this cat makes are hilarious.”
“They are known to be very grumpy cats,” I grin. “I guess we need to get up.”
“Is this really okay?” he asks, worried.
“I am fine,” I reassure him. I really am. Cuddling and talking with him was amazing and helped my mind settle, too. “More than fine, actually.”
“Then how about you go and freshen up, and I feed our indoor pets.”
“Really?” I beam. “You would do that?”
“Of course,” he says. “They are our pets, obviously. I need to make sure they accept me as your mate.”
“Tiger already loves you,” I say. “She is their pack leader. If she loves you, all the others will.”
He grins before jumping out of the bed and grabbing a pair of boxers. “We’ll see.”
I make sure not to take too long in the shower.
With Brandon, I always took longer in there because I needed the warmth of the shower to help me come down, because he wouldn’t give me the warmth I truly needed.
But Felix gave it to me, and I realize that there is no need for me to indulge in my shower.
I never knew a relationship could be like that!
Once I am dried off and dressed, I look for Felix, noticing he has indeed fed all our pets.
Sending him to the bathroom, I take over and check on the outdoor animals.
All of this has such an incredible domestic feel to it.
I never imagined I would ever live in a pack, be mated to a wolf who accepted me and then live together with him like this.
It feels like a dream. And whenever I think it can’t be real, I can now reach out to the bond I clearly feel inside of me. Felix marked me, and I can feel his presence whenever I need to reassure myself.
Felix swings our arms playfully as we walk hand in hand to breakfast in the packhouse. I can’t remember the last time I’ve felt so lighthearted. It gives me the courage I need to tell him something else about me. “Felix, I need to tell you something.”
He grins. “That sounds serious. Hit me with it!”
“I don’t eat any meat,” I admit. “I am a veggie. I know it’s weird, being half wolf and living in a pack and all. I didn’t say anything sooner, because when we arrived here, there were so many vegetarian options for lunch, but I don’t want to hide it from you either…”
“Oh,” he chuckles. “I figured you were.”
“Really?”
“Yes, with your love of animals, I thought it made sense. I told my mom before we arrived to make sure we had some veggie dishes just in case.”
I stare at him in shock. “You did that?”
“Yes.” There is a flash of insecurity in his eyes. “Was that wrong?”
“Not at all!” I tug my hand free to hug him and squeeze him. “You are the best.”
“I know,” he laughs, twirling us around. “I am just such a catch.”
I let myself be engulfed in his joy and bask in it until I feel eyes on us. Someone clears his throat. “I hope we didn’t interrupt anything,” Dario says, sounding serious at first, before he chuckles.
“We wanted to pick you up,” Gisela adds. “And see if you want to have breakfast with us.”
I smooth my clothes and smile at them. “Thank you.”
Felix beams. “Let’s go.”
Dario tilts his head, his eyes on my neck for a moment before his face lights up with a smile.
Gisela must have spotted my mark, too, because she squeals all of a sudden. “You are marked! I am so happy for you.”
She pulls me into a hug, while Dario squeezes Felix’s arms. Their eyes gloss over, indicating that they are linking each other.
Fortunately, Gisela is hungry and ushers us to the packhouse instead of asking too many private questions.
On our way, we meet several pack members.
It doesn’t take long for them to notice I am marked.
I don’t like being on the spot usually, but everyone is so genuinely happy for us that I can’t help but be happy, too.
This is not the only good thing happening today.
The moment I step into the dining hall, my eyes immediately fall onto Faye.
She is standing next to an elderly woman, who is holding her hand and helping her choose from the buffet.
Faye is smiling. She is looking well-rested, more than she has in months; more proof of how much strain the last year must have put on her.
I was not mentally prepared and equipped to take care of Marina and her.
I did my best, but sometimes the best is not enough.
It's when Felix, Dario, Gisela, and I sit down with our own plates of food that I can feel eyes on me again.
Another pack member or family member who wants to talk to us?
Turning around, I scan the room. I briefly spot Aurelia and Arden, but they both seem to be in a hurry.
Arden is holding some folders while talking to Aurelia.
Elden and Flora aren’t around. They might come later, or maybe they were already there.
Felix told me they like to have one meal a day as a family.
It used to be breakfast, but now, with everyone’s busy schedules, they usually meet for dinner, and it seems like his parents are early risers and like to get breakfast before the others do.
No one seems to be paying attention to me, so what’s that weird feeling? I shift my gaze slightly, suddenly spotting the huge orange cat that belongs to Aurelia. I believe his name is Titan. Titan keeps staring at me as if he is looking right into my soul.
Then he turns around and trots away.
Weird.