Chapter 28
Chapter
Twenty-Eight
IF YOU CAN’T RUN WITH THE BIG DOGS STAY ON THE PORCH
Dallas
I am a coward.
It’s not really the kind of realization one likes to make when they hit middle age—or anytime really—but as I busy myself with getting Ryder ready for school Wednesday morning after sleeping a scant few hours on that fucking couch yet again, I can’t help but acknowledge how true it is.
I’ve spent the last three days avoiding being alone with Shelby because I am, apparently, a coward the likes of which hasn’t been seen since the cowardly lion in Wizard of Oz.
I know this because there was a time period when Ryder was obsessed with the book, and we read it nonstop until I had that whole thing memorized.
Shelby has every right to waltz in here and declare I’m nothing but a great, big coward.
“Dad? What’s buto-late-hydro-excito-land?” Ryder asks through a mouthful of cereal.
Dammit. He’s reading ingredient lists again. I spill hot coffee on my hand as I fill my thermos. “Shit!” I put the coffee down, wipe off my hand, and try to answer his question. “Probably a chemical of some sort.”
“A good one or a bad one?”
I grimace, out of my depth as I usually am with questions he throws my way. “The answer is probably the one you hate the most.”
Ryder sighs, pushing his chair back and taking his empty bowl to the sink. “I know, I know. It depends.”
I take a swig of hot coffee and grab his backpack. “You got it, kid. Now let’s head on out.”
Ryder puts on the backpack but runs the opposite direction from the truck. “We have to say goodbye to Shelby first!”
I grimace some more but dutifully follow. The boy won’t leave without saying goodbye, which is freaking cute as hell, but as I’m currently playing the part of a coward, I’d prefer we just sneak out unannounced.
When I hit my bedroom door, Ryder is already up on the bed, snuggled up with Shelby, who clearly just woke up.
She smiles at me like I haven’t been ignoring the fact that she wrote the world’s bestest worst poem for little old me three days ago.
Like she actually loves me and adores the little things I do for her. I smile back, but it’s forced.
“Pops is taking Ryder out for pizza tonight. Figured you and I could grab a bite at that new place, Canoodles, and have a chat?” My cowardly heart is pounding just talking to her. Fuck, why is she so damn pretty all rumpled and sleepy in my bed?
Her grin intensifies, and I know I’ve really fucked up. “I’d love that,” she answers softly.
I nod and bark my frustration at Ryder. “Come on, Ryd. We don’t want to be late.” Nelly blinks at me from the corner of the room, clearly choosing to stay with Shelby today instead of me. I don’t think I blame him.
I walk out without a backward glance. I’m afraid if I do look back, I’ll jump into that bed and spend the day cuddling up with those two like a real family.
And that’s not what today is about.
Today is the day I end things with Shelby. For good.
Canoodles is a little dark. Almost like they’re going for romantic noodles with the sputtering candle and dark wood booths.
If I’d known that, I wouldn’t have suggested the place.
We’re just about done eating, both of us sticking to light topics like our jobs and the latest town gossip.
Shelby’s gaze hasn’t left my face all evening, like she’s waiting for me to say something.
I have nothing else to say. I know she’d be settling with me, and I want more than that for my best friend. I love the woman with every fiber of my being, but so did Ridge with Tiff. And Pops with Mom. And look how happy those guys are now.
I check the time on my phone for the hundredth time. Shelby watches my every move.
“You expecting a call?” she asks.
I go to answer her but get cut off when her eyes widen, and she stares out the front window of Canoodles, distracted finally.
The telltale click-clop tells me my plan has arrived.
I slide out of the booth and hold out my hand to her.
She takes it, still staring at the white horse that’s stopped in front of the restaurant.
“What the…”
I pull her outside, where we both stare up at the guy on top of the horse. He’s dressed in pretty fucking realistic armor like a real knight of the Round Table. The chest plate piece clanks when he lifts his arm and takes off the metal helmet.
Clark is handsome in a scholarly way, hands smooth from turning pages, not wrestling cattle or sanding wood. The kind of way Shelby would find attractive. He doesn’t spare me a look, which is good. I didn’t hire him for me. This whole show is for Shelby. For our public breakup.
Several people have crowded closer to see what the deal is.
It’s not every day a knight prances down Main Street on a white steed.
Mrs. Perkins pushes to the front of the crowd with her cane.
She gets a little too close to the horse for my comfort, probably because she can’t hear unless she’s right on top of everything.
“Hello, fair lady,” the knight booms, stretching his arm in Shelby’s direction.
“The soft morning dew couldn’t be as sweet as you.
No fairer place to rest one’s head than in the arms of a lover, and yet does this scoundrel give you respite?
” He glares at me quite convincingly. “Provide shelter through the storm? Anchor himself so he can be the tether that brings you home? I dare sayeth not!”
God, this guy is good. I don’t even know what the fuck he’s talking about.
Shelby glances at me in confusion. The knight slides off his horse with a loud clink and dramatically tosses his helmet into the street. Shit, I hope no one drives over it.
“Dallas! Hey!” The second part of my plan has arrived in tight jeans and a low-cut top that has me glancing away in embarrassment.
One inhale too deep, and she’ll be experiencing a nip slip on Main Street.
Primrose, the girl I hired to flirt with me, slides her arm through mine and presses those boobs against me as she stares up at me through fake lashes.
She’s pretty…in a way that does nothing for me.
“You comin’ back to my place tonight like usual, sugar? ”
Shelby’s mouth falls open. The knight slides his metallic arm around her waist. “Come, my fair maiden. Away from this rapscallion. My love would never find another. Let us ride off into the sunset together.”
“I knew it!” Mrs. Perkins squawks and points at me. “Death by STD for that one.”
I roll my eyes. Of all people, why did she have to witness this breakup? Primrose goes up on her tiptoes to kiss me. I turn my head at the last second, stomach churning, and she gets my cheek.
Clark takes a step forward toward the horse, but ends up tipping off the curb, almost taking Shelby with him.
The metal shin guards have slid higher, blocking his knees from bending.
He just tips right over in slow motion, and down he goes to the asphalt in a pile of metal clanks and curses.
The onlookers gasp. Shelby rushes to help the poor guy, and Primrose looks around confused.
“Oh my god,” someone whispers. “A leg shouldn’t look like that, right?”
“Wait. Is that Shelby Sweet?” Primrose asks loudly.
She steps back and smacks my chest so hard I wheeze.
“You wanted me to fake an affair with you so you could break up with Shelby?? You should have told me that! I’d never do that to my girl, Shelbs.
She saved my pookie last year. My little hedgehog baby. ”
I groan. I should have known this wouldn’t work out. None of my grand gestures did, so why would my breakup? I should have hired real actors from Hollywood, not amateurs from one town over.
“A little…help…here,” the knight croaks from down below.
“Dallas!” Shelby stands, coming over and giving Primrose a side hug. “We have to call an ambulance. His leg’s broken.”
I already have my phone out, calling dispatch. “Hey, I have a bit of a scene here.”
The dispatcher, a woman we went to high school with, cackles. “Yeah, I’m already getting calls and have an ambulance en route. Mrs. Perkins is streaming it live on her Instagram.”
My head shoots up to see Mrs. Perkins shoving her cell phone in Clark’s face as he wails in pain. D’Wayne slides in on Clark’s other side, his orange ski cap askew. The cardboard sign he’s been holding lately about the end being near blows away down the street.
D’Wayne thrusts his fist in the air. “We must cut off the leg! Here. You can bite down on my leather belt.” Clearly he’s getting into character right along with Clark. Crap, maybe I should have hired D’Wayne. He’s pretty believable.
I hang up, look up at the sky, and pray for patience. For wisdom. Maybe even for a crater to open up and suck me in.
“See?” Shelby says, sounding way too calm. “Let’s save the grand gestures for the fiction books.”
Primrose whacks me in the gut again. “I can’t believe you!”
Shelby shifts to stand by my side. “Don’t sweat it, Primrose. He’s just going through something right now. A bit of an identity crisis, I think. He was trying to put together a third-act breakup, but we all know how those end up.”
Primrose rolls her eyes but thankfully appears to have stopped hitting me. “Oh god. I hate third-act breakups.”
“Me too!” Shelby chirps, sliding her arm around my waist.
I drop my head back down and stare at her. “You’re not mad?”
She smiles, even as the wail of a distant siren breaks up the calm night. “No. I love how much you’re trying to protect me. It’s misguided, of course, but it’s funny as hell to watch you try to protect me from yourself.”
“This is funny?”
Shelby looks down at the poor knight who’s writhing in agony.
She winces. “Some parts more than others.” Then she spins so she’s directly in front of me, blocking out the scene on the ground, her hands fisting my T-shirt.
She’s all I can see. Has been for a while, if I’m honest. “I want you, Dallas Beaufort Gamble. Past, present, and all of my future. Let yourself love me. Please?”
I drop my forehead to hers, too weak to fight this any longer. “I do love you, Sweetness. So much I’m scared I’ll fuck it up. I would have to kick my own ass for hurting you and ruining our relationship. I’ve been a coward, hoping you’ll come to your senses and leave me like you should.”
Shelby shakes her head, jostling us both. “True courage is facing danger when you’re afraid. Isn’t that what the Wizard told the Lion in The Wizard of Oz?”
My eyes widen, right before my heart melts into a puddle at her feet. Of course, she remembers the months that Ryder made us read The Wizard of Oz every day. She’s been there for me and for him for as long as I can remember.
Terrified and hopeful, I cup her face with both hands. My throat feels like I’m being choked. “I love you, Shelby Sweet. With my whole cowardly heart.”
Her eyes fill with tears. Paramedics jump out of the ambulance and swarm Clark on the ground. “That’s all I want. Your whole heart. Because you’ve had mine since that day you accused me of stealing your cow.”
And then I put us both out of our misery and tip her over my arm to kiss her. The perfect Hollywood ending to a disaster of a breakup attempt.
The kiss also gets live-streamed to Mrs. Perkins’s Instagram account. My phone starts blowing up because, apparently, everyone else in Big Knob follows Mrs. Perkins.
I ignore the buzzing in my pocket and get lost in the woman who’s always been mine. I was just too cowardly to see it until now.