Chapter 26 #2
It’s a really dorky idea, but she is so very adamant on it, I give it the green light. These people have had the most oppressive job in the world. If McGillicuddy has this vision, why not go with it?
“Okay,” I say, and she and Captain Bane collaborate on how to make it seem like it’s sitting on the railing. Somebody finds a large pole to mount it on.
I’m not so sure about that choice, but I can’t think about that, I need to get dressed. “Don’t forget the banner!” I call as I rush out.
“On it,” Fernando says.
I rush to my quarters and put on my favorite dress of the batch that Bruno got me, which is a lot of brocade and tulle in the faded glamour colors of pink and black, do a quick hair refresh, and I’m back out with five minutes to spare.
And nearly have a heart attack.
Strung between overhead beams so it spans the whole space is a giant banner that says HEART YOU, CHUMPYWUMPY! in cream and gold, and the script is truly elegant.
Annie rushes over. “I know, I know. They’d lost the order, so Fernando had them make it on the spot. When we were joking about Chumpywumpy, he thought we were serious.”
“I specifically said ‘just kidding.’ I remember saying that.”
“He thought you meant you were just kidding about Bruno freaking out if it was two words.” She looks up at the banner. “Should we take it down? It really is nice, and I thought...it sounded like it might be a nickname, so I thought you could make the call.”
A helicopter sounds in the distance. I squint and see it gliding in.
Where is Bruno? Is he going to make me receive his brother all alone? That would be pretty unconvincing, considering we’re on our one-year-anniversary cruise.
I smooth down my party dress. Just then, the double whistle sounds, the universal sign that Bruno is coming. A door at the forward edge of the aft deck opens—the interior companionway that leads down from his workshop above—and Bruno strolls through, all dressed up in a tux.
Bruno’s attention is on the helicopter overhead.
“Ready?”
“Of course.”
He scowls at the fairy lights, which are already lit, even though the sun hasn’t set yet.
And then his eyes track up, to the banner stretched overhead, spanning the whole aft deck.
HEART YOU, CHUMPYWUMPY.
His lips move as he reads it.
I wince. “Okay, so the banner was sort of a miscommunication, but I think the rest of it turned out amazing!”
He’s still fixating on the banner, seemingly unable to make sense of it. “I don’t understand...”
“This is the anniversary celebration you asked me to put together. You wanted it to look elaborate, like I put a lot of work into it. And the crew and I really pulled it off. They were amazing—”
“No. No, no.”
“What? We’ll just say that’s a joke name that I gave you. And I know your feelings on flowers, but that is very standard anniversary fare.”
“Kelsey—I told him that I put a lot of work into it. That I arranged it all. Me.”
“Wait…you supposedly did all this?”
“I didn’t know it would be ‘all this.’”
“Oh my God, we have to take that banner down.”
Bruno looks up at the approaching helicopter. “It’s too late. He’ll have already seen it.”
“You would never put up a banner like that.” I clap my hand over my mouth. “I’m so sorry!”
“There is no way this works.” He grabs my hand as if to pull me somewhere, but I stand stock-still.
“No, this can work. We can sell it.”
He squints at me. “There is no way.”
“We’re in love, Bruno, and people in love are silly. People in love transform. You were a lonely, mirthless hermit before I met you and I have opened up your world with joy.”
He lowers his voice. “You know my feelings on joy.”
I tug him toward the foot of the stairs that descend from the helipad and call to Annie to bring two half glasses of champagne.
The thing is now touching down. “My friend Mia always says, if you really commit, you can pull off anything.”
Bruno’s face has hardened, like he’s bracing for war.
“I am your Chumpywumpy. Say it.”
He just looks into the distance. The muscles in his jaw tighten.
Looking into his anguished, battle-ready face suddenly makes me feel a little bad for him. I remind myself that this is really important to Bruno. I turn his face and look him deep in the eyes, trying to infuse him with all the confidence I can muster. “We got this.”
He’s not convinced.
“We do. We can do this.” I link my arm in his, and we stand at the base of the stairs next to the giant teddy bear, which Bruno regards with a look of great pain.
“Jesus Christ.”
“Stop!” I scold.
The helicopter door opens and a man with Bruno’s same burnished-bronze hair and a slightly stockier build steps out onto the helipad above us.
He’s wearing sunglasses and holding a wrapped gift the size of a shoebox.
He crosses to the top of the stairs, registers the teddy bear waiting there with its plush heart, and visibly stops. Then he starts down.
“Why would you think you would be throwing a celebration on my yacht?” Bruno says to me.
“Because you hate fun? I would be the natural person to do it!”
Under his breath, Bruno says, “Adrian will ask you questions that sound casual but aren’t. He will be polite and he will be pleasant and none of it will be real. And if he determines this is a false front, every arrangement I have made to protect—” He stops himself. “Everything falls apart.”
I swallow. And he’ll have to let himself be red meat in the documentary. Or spill the horrible, life-altering secret he’s protecting his brothers from. Or maybe it’s himself he’s protecting. For all the time I’ve spent with him, and all of the secrets I’ve told him, he remains an enigma.
It’s here that I start worrying that maybe I can’t pull this off. He knows a lot about me, but what do I really know about him?
“All we can do is our best.” I squeeze his hand as Adrian reaches the bottom of the stairs.
Adrian regards our joined hands with some bemusement and then he looks up at his brother. “Bruno.”
“Adrian. I’d like you to meet Kelsey.”
“Yes, the secret, late-breaking girlfriend.”
I take his hand warmly. “I’m so glad you’re here. Bruno was a little grumpy about opening up our celebration cruise even a little bit.” I gaze up at Bruno. “But hey, he’s cute when he’s grumpy, so all is well.”
Bruno blinks, looking baffled. Is he even going to be able to do this?
Adrian is carefully taking in the scene. The hearts and fairy lights and flowers and the giant banner.
“Is that for us?” I chirp, hopefully derailing whatever thoughts he’s having about the banner.
He hands over the present with an amused look.
This is already not going well.