Chapter 7 Ace
seven
Ace
While Penny's going through her belongings, Smoke's kind enough to swallow up the entrance of the bathroom as I catch him up with everything that's gone down.
Killer and Devil have left, thankfully. As much as I needed their help today, just having them near Penny was enough to drive me insane.
If my brother weren't such a prude, then I think I'd be frothing at the mouth over him, too.
Wearing a disapproving frown as I lift my shirt, we both stare at my bruised rib. He wants to scold me for heading into their territory without proper backup, I bet. For not asking him to come with me. But I needed someone Penny recognized to share the same space as her so she didn't get scared.
Poking gently at the purple blotches on my skin, a soft groan leaves me. "Nothing's broken, but man, I need to look into what brand of boots they wear. Pretty fucking effective, I think."
He doesn't even crack at my attempt at a joke. "What did you find out?"
Always so serious, I hold back a groan and try to keep my voice low.
"They're getting hot and bothered over a measly six thousand, plus the idiotic interest they're trying to hold over her head.
Here, I thought it would be an easy slip-in-and-out kind of deal, but they were casing the place. Assholes ruined so much."
Twisting and looking at my back to make sure there aren't any cuts, I curse at the dried blood clinging to the fabric. Hurts like a bitch to peel it off.
Smoke clicks his tongue, entering the room and shutting the door behind him before hunting down the first aid kit beneath the sink.
"It's barely a scratch."
"You could've asked Dante for more than those two."
I could've, but that would've taken far too long. Those two were available at the time, and I was already ready to get back home.
"I found out her ex's name," I continue on, pursing my lips at the memory of finding broken photographs. "He's a good-looking dude. I think she likes older men more, and that sucks. I don't even have a single gray hair yet."
That earns me a blow to the back of my head. Cursing, I rub the sore spot.
"You are unbearable when you're smitten." Tending my wound, the alcohol burns hot, and I have to grit my teeth to stop from making any alarming noises. "So, you're going to track him down?"
"I've already asked Hex to look into him.
" Groaning, a sigh follows next. "I didn't kill any of those assholes.
Should've, but I didn't. I hoped if the survivors knew we were involved, they'd back off a bit.
Even better, I promised them that I'd find the guy and let them do whatever the fuck they want with him. "
I need to talk to Penny about it. After last night, the last thing I want to do is go behind her back and kill someone I'm jealous of. Not if it means risking the chance of making the woman hate me instead of loving me.
If she can't get on board with it, then I guess I'll just have to cling to her side every minute of the day just in case to keep her safe. Either way, it sounds like a win-win for me.
Smoke patches me up before slapping his hand on the bandage. "All better."
"Asshole." Cursing his name next, I follow it up with my appreciation. "Thanks for looking out. Heading back to the casino?"
He nods. "You know where to find me. Can't promise I'll make as much without you."
Once everything settles down and things go back to normal, I'll become his partner once more. He's got nothing to worry about. We'll recoup, we always do.
"Don't do anything stupid." Opening the door, he frowns like he's sending more of a threat my way than concern.
Motioning a salute, that just gives me a disappointed shake of his head before he leaves. Guy can act as hard as he wants, but he still says goodbye to the other two.
When Leliah gives him a silent wave, I realize that, shit, maybe I am a little jealous of Smoke.
Gripping my shirt, I know there's no point in hiding the state of my body. This isn't exactly a rare sight. The only thing that changes is the spot of the wound. Luckily, this time, they're nothing concerning.
Nothing that'll keep me from her, anyway.
Tossing the shirt away in the trash, I pass by the two as they unpack Leliah's toys. I'd found some stuffed animals and weird-looking activity toys that weren't touched, and by the looks of it, I'd picked the right things.
Leliah's smiling. For the first time since I set my eyes on the little girl, she's got a brightness to her that hits me square in the chest.
The two ladies are going to be my downfall.
Penny lifts her gaze to see me drinking in the view. She's changed, now wearing a shirt far more fitting with a pair of jeans worn at the knees. Despite taking a minute to decide what clothes to bring, I didn't have all the time in the world. Not without any of the other club’s backup crawling in.
She looks comfortable. Like her daughter, she's smiling. Talk about a double knockout. Jesus.
I'd burn the whole world down to keep that smile on her face.
The woman notices my state. First, her face pinkens at my toplessness, before she pales, and a look of worry swallows up that smile.
I should be upset with myself that I've got her this way, but I can't even lie. I love her worrying over me. My cock does too, from the way it's already hardening up.
Down, boy. Not the time.
She's going to think I'm some kind of horn dog if I can't keep it in my pants, but the way she looks at me...
"Care for a chat?" Curling my finger, I'm already stepping back toward the kitchen. My smile grows when she gets to her feet, leaving Leliah to play with a device that screeches a noise each time she pushes a button.
Once she's close enough to be within my reach, I can't help myself. I back her against the counter. Despite the squeaking noise she makes, she doesn't try to pull away.
She fits against me so well, I can’t help but be amazed every time.
"Finally alone, huh?" Leaning in, I fight the urge to kiss her. God, I keep wondering what it'll be like if she kisses me first.
Would she be shy? Confident? Would she taste the same as last night?
"You're hurt." Pointing out the obvious, I groan when I feel her fingers against my ribs. It's not the bruise that aches, but the gentleness of her touch. "You shouldn't have done that."
She's touching me as if I matter. Like these bruises mean something because they're on me.
"And miss the chance for that?" I nod toward Leliah as she giggles softly. "No way. Penny, I'd do it again."
In a heartbeat. Maybe with more backup, though. But I'd still go without an ounce of hesitation.
"Thank you." Her next words hit me hard. "I'll never be able to pay you back, you know that, don't you?"
She doesn't get it. She doesn't understand that she's already given me more than she'll ever know.
The next groan that leaves me reaches even deeper in my chest. Stepping forward, there's no space left between us before I sigh into her hair. "Can't you believe that I don't want anything back? Money barely means anything to me. Having you right here, touching me like this? This is all I want."
Why is that so hard for her to believe?
If I outright told her how badly I need her here, how much I want her to abandon her past and start something new here with me, I'd risk making her feel obligated to stay. She has to choose it because she wants to.
Not because she's grateful. Not because she's scared. Because she wants me.
"How long until that changes?" Her question surprises me, even more than when she runs her palm up my chest. "What happens when you get bored or find something better?"
Bored? Of her? Is she insane?
Grabbing her hand, I slide it right over where my heart is beating in my chest. Keeping it there, we both feel it crashing around.
"Ever since I saw you in the casino, my heart hasn't stopped beating like this. There's only one thing that'll stop my heart beating this way, and that won't be something happening any time soon. So, in short, as long as I'm breathing, it's only you, Penny."
There's no one else. There won't ever be anyone else.
Watching her bite her lip as she stares at our hands, she makes it impossible to know what she's thinking. Still, the way her cheeks start to return to a pink shade has to be a pretty good sign, right?
She's considering it. Considering me. That's enough for now.
What sucks is that I'm going to have to ruin my confession by getting back to the matters at hand. Especially when she's looking so kissable right about now.
I don't want to do this. I want to stay in this moment forever. But she deserves the truth. She deserves a choice.
Taking a step back with strength I don't realize I have, we separate enough that if what I say next upsets her, then she can leave. Away from me, and out of this place if she really wants to.
I'm a bastard for bringing her stuff here in hopes it'll help her want to be here, even more for wishing something like this could help her look past what scares her the most. Club business.
But I'm not a good man. I've never pretended to be. The least I can do is be honest about that.
"We need to talk about Johnny." Speaking his name leaves a sour taste in my mouth, and it takes strength not to curse. "I need to know what we're going to do about him."
She inhales shakily at the seriousness behind my words before looking away. "I don't know where he's at. Nobody does. He could be... dead for all I know."
She says it like she's testing the idea. Like she's trying to figure out what it would feel like.
How does that make her feel, the concept of him being dead? Relieved? Sad? Guilty? I can't tell. Her face is a locked door.
"We'll track him down whether he's breathing or not.
We will find him, that's a guarantee. Now, what I need to know is what you want to do once we do.
Turning him over will be the best way to get all this over with.
Or..." My fingers curl and uncurl before I shove them through my hair.
"You can go back to him and figure this out yourself. "
The last option nearly chokes me. But I have to offer it. I have to let her choose.
Seeing those photos in her home wasn't the worst part. It was seeing Penny's smiling face in them that tore something deep within me. If she could be happier with him... then I'd have to let her go.
Even if it crushes my poor heart into pieces. After what I’ve done in life, that would just be karma’s way of getting back at me.
"What if you can't find him?" Her voice is so soft, I can hear the fear seeping in. "What then?"
We will, but to entertain her, I offer up a small smile. "You stay here. Not here specifically, but under Steelwood's protection. You'll have to leave everything behind and start new here."
None of those options secures her a spot at my side, but I can't offer her a fourth option without being demanding.
I want to. I want to get on my knees and beg her to stay. But that's not fair. That's not a real choice.
Frowning now, she stares at her hands for the longest time before lifting her gaze.
"He left us knowing they'd come." Her voice wobbles, and her eyes turn glossy. "He's distanced himself to the point that I wasn't even aware of what he was doing."
There it is. The crack in her armor. She's not defending him. She's not making excuses.
Hearing her confession makes me question what I'd seen. What if their paradise wasn't as perfect as what those lenses caught? What if Penny wasn't happy with the guy?
What if she's been waiting for someone to show up and remind her what it feels like to be wanted?
It means I still stand a chance. More than a chance. If she's saying this out loud...
"If he's alive, what's stopping him from putting Leliah in danger again?" The question leaves her in a whisper, her feelings revealed.
She's not asking me what we should do. She's telling me what she needs.
She can see it too. He's a liability every minute he remains unchecked, and she's handing me the permission she can't bring herself to say out loud.
I want to cradle her to my chest and wipe away any tears before they can fall, but I force myself to remain still.
"You're not a bad person for making him take on what he's responsible for.
You're not a bad mother for keeping your daughter safe, either.
Let me shoulder all the ugly, Pen. I'll handle it all, and you can live how you want to. "
Let me be the bad guy. That's what I'm here for.
She swipes at her eyes and nods her head. "Okay."
"Okay?"
The last thing I expect her to do is step toward me and lift her arms. It's not until she's hugging my neck that I realize what's happening.
She's holding me. She's choosing me. Right now, at this moment, she's choosing me.
My heart starts pounding even harder as I wrap my arms around her. Feeling her nod against my shoulder, it's the shakiness of her sobs that sends me over the edge.
She's crying, and I'm the one she's holding onto.
There's no going back now. This woman really owns my heart. I'm happily willing to send a man to his death if it means this woman can wrap herself around me like this because she trusts me. To the point of feeling safe.
Stroking her hair, I coax soft whispers of reassurance against the strands as she calms herself down. The last thing I want is for Leliah to see her mom in this state.
But when she pulls back, when she looks at me with those red-rimmed eyes, I see something new there.
Not guilt or uncertainty, but relief.
The sooner I take care of this problem, the sooner this woman will be able to smile again without ever having to look over her shoulder. Not unless it's at me for following right behind her, and I will be.
Every step of the way.