CHAPTER 11
QUINCY
When Rian looks up at Brielle, something squishy happens in my chest. I’ve always wanted kids, but I started giving up on that dream a few years ago. It felt safer to put the dream away than admit to myself I wasn’t going to meet a man to have a family with.
Not just any man either.
That was never an option. As much as I wanted to have someone to walk through life with me, I was never going to allow desperation to blind me to the men around me and who they really are.
It was more likely that I’d meet a random man and fall in love with him, someone with no ties to the entertainment world.
My gaze slides over to Hawkins who is standing with Cowboy. He keeps glancing my way as if he’s trying to make sure that I’m still here and that I’m okay. The warmth from his care spreads through my body after starting in my chest.
“I’m going to go draw a picture,” Rian announces.
She dive-bombs me with a hug, and I allow myself to feel all of it. I realize I’ve just met this little girl, but there’s something magical about her. The way she opens herself up to the people around her, giving them all her light with abandon, has me falling in love with her.
“I hope this isn’t the only time I see you, Quincy.” She pulls back and looks up at me with a blindingly bright smile on her face, “Friends keep in touch.”
“You are absolutely right,” I agree with her. My voice drops to a whisper as I tell her, “I don’t have many friends, I can’t afford to lose any.”
“You don’t have many friends?” The shock and incredulousness in her voice makes me smile.
Having a ten-year-old offended on my behalf is a new experience, but the fierce look on her face makes me love this turn of events.
“That’s not going to work for me, Quincy.
Now you have us. We’re a big family and there is plenty of room for you. ”
“I’m so glad I met you today, Rian,” I tell her.
She gives me one more hug and then she’s off. I find myself watching the place where she just was, dazzled by everything that is Rian.
Brielle chuckles softly and when I look at her, the understanding on her face has me blowing out a breath. “She’s amazing,” I tell her honestly.
Her face lights up with a huge smile and she nods slowly. “She is. I’m lucky she’s opened her heart to me. Sometimes I can’t believe that she’s not mine.”
I meet Brielle’s eyes, my voice like steel, “She is yours.” When she blinks at me, I keep going. “It’s obvious that she loves you with everything she is and you feel the same way about her. I think that’s what matters more than biology.”
Her entire being softens. “You’re right.
” She glances toward where Rian disappeared and then glances at Cowboy.
“I was shocked when I found out he had a daughter. It brought home how much life continued to move on, which is the whole reason why our paths diverged in the first place—life was always going to take us in different directions.”
“You knew him a long time ago?”
“We were high school sweethearts,” she tells me, something wistful crossing her face. “But I needed to chase the stage lights, and he needed to figure out who he was and where he belonged.”
As I nod over toward our men, I point out, “It seems like he found his place.”
“He did,” she confirms. “I moved to town not long ago because I realized there wasn’t as much room for me on the stage in New York anymore. I was tired of always competing with younger dancers who had the fire in their bellies that felt like a distant memory to me at that point.”
“I can understand that feeling,” I keep my voice low, the words feeling like a confession I’m not ready to make.
I’m not sure if I’ll ever be ready.
Brielle looks at me like she understands the restlessness and doubt which has been haunting me. Maybe she does.
She’s been on stage. She’s dealt with the expectations of others when it comes to making a production successful. She’s put herself on the line with auditions.
“Is that why you’re in Las Vegas?” She tilts her head as she asks like she already knows the answer to her question.
“Yeah,” I breathe out, “I’ve been realizing lately that I’m not able to find the point in it all anymore.
I started out in the industry because I was in the right place at the right time, but then it was an opportunity that seemed like fun and I didn’t want to waste it because it was so serendipitous. ”
“The spotlight isn’t kind to the people in it,” Brielle says with a sage nod.
“No,” I shake my head, “it’s not. I never know who to trust, and I never know if I’m just being used for someone else to get ahead. I don’t believe that the people around me care about anything other than themselves.”
“So, you live in a constant state of readiness?” Her eyes soften as she looks at me. “Can you ever relax?”
My shoulders slump slightly after I shrug. “No, I don’t think I’ve relaxed in a long time, not mentally at least.”
The words feel fragile and delicate. Brielle simply nods, giving me space to feel the truth I just shared.
“What I told Rian is true,” the words tumble out of me, “I don’t have many friends.
One of my closest and oldest friends, which is hard to keep ahold of in LA, left it all behind years ago.
She’s blissfully happy with a man who worships every breath she takes.
She has a family. I love that for her, but I’m a little jealous.
She suggested I get out of town and try something new which is why I agreed to the tournament. ”
“You’ve been kicking ass at the table,” Brielle teases me, her eyebrows wiggling and causing me to laugh.
She straightens slightly, her words turning serious, “It takes a lot of courage to try something new.” She pauses and glances at our bikers with a sly grin before pointing out, “I think you’ve found a man who worships you like that too. ”
My cheeks heat slightly as I look at Hawkins. His intense blue eyes are already locked on me, even though I know he’s still having a conversation with his brother.
“Are all the bikers around here as intense as him?” I ask the question out of the side of my mouth.
Brielle tips her head back and laughs, the sound filling the room and drawing the curious attention of another man in leather who just walked in. When he looks at me, his eyes widen slightly, but he doesn’t approach. I appreciate it more than I can say.
“Oh yeah,” she responds without hesitation. “These men fall hard and they don’t let anything stand in their way when they claim their woman. It’s kind of amazing to watch.”
I can’t help but wince. “He’s a lot younger than I am,” I keep the words low because I don’t need anyone else knowing about my fears.
“Girl,” she looks me over, “you better consider that a bonus and just go with it. The way he looks at you?” She fans herself and I can’t help but laugh.
A smile stays on her face, but her tone turns serious, “He’s a good guy and he’ll devote his entire being to you, but he’s still a man who will do stupid things from time to time, age isn’t a factor when it comes to that.
One thing you’ll never have to worry about is loyalty.
These men ride on the edge of danger where their life literally relies on their brothers.
They understand trust and their loyalty pumps through their bodies right along with their blood. ”
My mouth twists to the side and I nod slowly. “I want to trust it. It feels like I can.”
“What do you really have to lose? The worst that can happen is that you leave here with the memories of some damn good orgasms and maybe a better understanding of what could happen next for you,” she offers the words like she didn’t just become my personal fucking life coach.
And I’ve never been the kind of celebrity to put credence into that kind of shit.
“Give him a chance to surprise you,” she whispers, her eyes darting over my shoulder.
Then I’m fucking airborne before I’m dangling over Hawkins’ shoulder. I slap his ass and laugh. “What are you doing?”
But he doesn’t stop moving until a door slams behind us and I’m being lowered onto an exceptionally soft bed. I glance around the very masculine room. It smells like Hawkins, so it doesn’t take a genius to figure out this is his space.
It’s minimal, which isn’t a surprise, but it’s also clean. My eyebrows pull together and my biker scoffs, “Were you expecting a frat boy’s room?”
When I meet his blue eyes, he arches an eyebrow, the challenge clear on his face.
“Sorry,” I squeak with a grimace.
One side of his mouth tips up as his hands start to glide over my body. He takes fabric with him and I shift without thinking, helping him with his endeavor.
Brielle’s suggestion to enjoy this while giving him a chance to surprise me rings through my mind. When it’s like this, when he’s so close, all the concerns which felt so big moments ago don’t matter at all.
I tug at the fabric of his t-shirt and he stands. I watch, completely fascinated, as he allows his cut to fall from his shoulders, catching it and hanging it on a hook while his eyes take in the way I’m naked and on display.
For him.
In his space.
My thighs rub together and I let out a little whimper. He smirks as he straightens, his boxer briefs and jeans around the boots he’s just stepped out of. His hand wraps around the base of his cock and I lick my lips as he strokes himself slowly.
“You like watching me stroke my dick while taking in how fucking sexy you look laid out for me, Hollywood?”
My head tips to the side and I bite the edge of my lower lip, a moan threatening to spill out. Before my next heartbeat, Hawkins is there, looming over me and using the breadth of him to push me flat on my back.
“Don’t hold back those moans, Quincy,” his voice is a warning. “I want to hear you.”
I reach for him, needing the weight of him, craving it in a way I’ve only ever felt with him. “Please,” I mewl.
When his mouth crashes down on mine, the kiss feels like something more than just the primal need to be as close to each other as possible. The sensation wraps around me, and my nails dig into my biker’s shoulders.
“Hawkins,” I gasp and he nips at the sensitive skin of my neck. My back arches and my grip tightens on him. “Please fill me with your cock and cum.” I can’t stop the waver in my voice, not from fear, but from pure fucking desire.
“Fuck,” he barks.
His forehead falls against my collarbone. Then he’s burying his length inside of me in one thrust and I let out a sound which is part yelp and part sin. He groans and then he starts to move.
Our eyes lock and he growls, “I’ll be making love to you next, Hollywood, but this time will be a quick fuck to take the edge off.
” When my walls squeeze around him, my body responding to the filthy promise in his words, the way his lip curls makes my nipples painfully hard.
He slams into me, my tits jiggling and my fingers scrambling to hold on tighter.
“You need it just as bad as I do,” his voice is pure seduction.
And he’s right.
“Yes,” I admit, “I need it. Need you,” my words slur.
Lust takes over, my body moving in time with his while begging, pleading with every movement, for more. He gives me everything I could ever dream of and my brain, blissfully, stops.
No worries about what I’m doing with my life.
No concerns about how I can have everything I want while trapped in something I’m not sure I want anymore.
Just him.
And the way my body hums with his touch.
He cocoons me in his warmth, in his affection. And I want it to be all mine with every thump of my heart.
“That’s it,” he encourages me, “you’re going to come so fucking hard. Your pleasure is mine; give it to me.” He snarls, “Mine.”
And just like that, I shatter. Completely. My eyes roll back in my head, and his name is a soundless movement of my lips. He steals my voice while I’m flung into a bliss which feels too big to contain.
Not by me alone.
Hawkins slams into me. Once. Twice.
On the third time, he lets out a growl that is feral and sexy as fuck.
“So, fucking perfect,” he rumbles, “and all mine.”
I can only hope it’s real. Because I want to be his. Badly.