Chapter 36
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
Selena
A gentle breeze caressed my skin, cooling the blanket of warmth that surrounded me.
The sounds of waves crashing on a shore filled my ears, rather than the humming from a space vessel I expected.
Confused, I opened my eyes to Zirene’s face peering down at me, concern lacing the amethyst eyes I knew so well.
“Selena. Are you well?” he asked gently, voice strained with worry.
I glanced around, taking in our surroundings.
Gone was the simplistic dark cabin I last remembered, along with the nestmates I held dear. Instead, I lay next to a bare-chested Zirene on top of a cushioned floor mat under a gazebo, its curtains lightly blowing in the seaside winds.
“I assume we are dreaming?” I asked, confirming we were alone and hadn’t landed yet.
“Yes, we are,” he breathed as concern crossed his face. “I hope you don’t mind me being here, but I needed to make sure you were okay.”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
His hesitation worried me. Zirene had always been a male who acted first without consulting others if he believed he was right.
It made sense after all these years why he would be this way—he was a prince of a large empire. When it came down to making a life-altering decision, it was up to him to have the answers, without delay or doubt.
“You fell into a deep sleep after your short lesson from the Chamber Master,” he growled.
“And? You knew that was what he would do, especially since you couldn’t teach me this important ability.”
“Yes, we included your lesson in our schedule, which allowed us to do our pre-flight inspections. But that isn’t the problem.” His eyes hardened as he sat up and looked away. “He rushed you, pushed your limits without thinking about the fragility of your connections—”
“What happened?” I demanded in fear.
“You lost your court bond with V’dim and Z’fir. They hailed me worried and confused as soon as I felt you fall into the dreamscape. Both males thought they angered you somehow by leaving you behind—as if they failed some test to prove themselves to you.”
“But… I thought I succeeded,” I breathed as I sat up and followed Zirene’s gaze. Watching the lavender waves beat on the white sands, I reflected on Mwe’s lesson and followed everything we did. “It makes little sense… I felt nothing—”
“Exactly. Mwe has a strong presence and does his job perfectly when it comes to surveying the occupants in the Assembly Chamber and dampening their connections. He tends to forget about his strength and how to limit himself outside his work. That is why he annoys me and I am not afraid to let him know. He needs someone to remind him he isn’t untouchable, and outside of the Assembly, he has no power.
Mwe is a respectable male but carries too many secrets about the happenings in the CEG—”
“Which is why you don’t like him around because he could overhear any details about your new tech and your special agents.
But that doesn’t matter!” I grabbed his arm with both hands and tried to gain his attention, to look at me instead of at whatever was more interesting.
“I need to wake up and contact them to explain what happened.”
He growled and rolled his arm, pulling it out of my hands before pushing my back onto the soft cushions. Swinging his body over my mine, he pinned me between his arms as his legs opened mine.
“Listen to me, Selena. There is nothing, nothing you can do right now to fix this,” he hissed, his eyes drilled into mine. “Not now. You need to calm down.”
I shook my head in refusal as my tears fell, blurring my vision.
“I didn’t reject them! They don’t deserve to go through what Odelm did. He came to me as a broken male, mentally scarred and filled with doubt—he still has issues even now.”
Zirene’s shadow darkened as his chest pressed against mine. His purrs rumbled through his body as he nudged my head with his nose. I closed my eyes and turned away, exposing my neck to him.
“Relax,” he whispered. “Contact them and explain to them in your words what happened. But after that? Focus on settling down, and when they arrive, you can work on mending what you had.”
“But…” I peeked at him, trying to see what he was doing.
“Relax…” He commanded gently, his lips pressing against my shoulder. Slowly, he lapped my neck, sending shivers through my body.
I closed my eyes and moaned at the sensations he gave me, allowing him to comfort me.
This was the male I knew so well.
Outside of this dreamscape, his position demanded attention from all around him. His aura made those around automatically turn their heads and obey.
But here, he could relax and not put on a front. There was no one who needed to impress, to command, or to attempt to challenge his decisions.
Here, we were equals. I hoped someday it would be the same outside.
I jerked awake, sucking in a breath as I sat up.
The surrounding room wasn’t the one I fell asleep in. It was bright and much larger. Sunlight beamed through glass windows, lighting up the green and silver bed twice the size of the one on the Destiny. Jade-swirled black marble tile covered the floors as silver etched the purple walls.
Xylo and Odelm were asleep, sandwiching me between them on the center platform, each with an appendage wrapped around my legs.
How had I gotten here? Was this my new room? The room Zirene spent all this time creating to make perfect for me?
“Selena?” Xylo mumbled.
“Selena, are you okay?” Odelm asked gently, worry lacing his voice.
Both nestmates scrambled awake and leaned over me as they searched my eyes.
“Where are we?”
A weary smile crossed Xylo’s face. “We are in our clan’s bedroom in your villa on Destima.”
“We are?”
“Yes, Selena. It’s magnificent.” Odelm glanced at Xylo. “But we have explored little as we waited for you.”
“And our cubs?”
“Safe,” Xylo announced. “They have been worried about you but have enjoyed exploring the villa’s grounds. Supervised, of course.”
“Thank the Stars.”
I closed my eyes and sighed as I leaned back onto the mattress.
I searched my shields; they were up and well—including my connections with both of my nestmates sitting beside me.
Zirene was right. My shallow connections with my Circuli princes were missing, severed from my walls, their spots completely missing as if their windowed attachments were never there.
“I need to talk to V’dim and Z’fir,” I said, staring at the ceiling. “Please tell me that is easy to do.”
“Zirene installed a vid-screen in our sitting area and ensured you would be able to comm the Destiny along with many others,” Xylo replied. “Let us move over there while Odelm calls for something to be delivered for you.”
Sitting up, I nodded. “Please.”
Both males unwrapped their appendages from me and led me off the large nestbed to the sitting area on the side. A long jade-colored couch—which seemed to be able to sit four easily—hugged two sets of purple chairs and a large display table, similar to those at the Zero G-Spot.
Odelm used his tablet while Xylo fumbled with what I assumed was the vid-screen hanging from the wall. The display flickered as a loading circle appeared, spinning. Xylo sighed and stepped away, sitting next to me.
The screen blacked out, and two familiar faces appeared, stress apparent by their expressions. V’dim’s coloring was off—gone was his bold, dark, water-like patterns. Instead, he appeared ashen, almost gray. Both of their eyes were dim as they scanned the room.
When their eyes met mine, both sighed in relief.
“Selena…” V’dim murmured. “I… We…”
Z’fir placed a hand on V’dim’s shoulder, silencing him. “Selena… Are you well?”
“I should ask both of you…” I breathed. “I am well, but… you aren’t.
” Odelm placed a hand on mine, squeezing it.
I could feel him trying to calm me—ground me—to prevent me from crying in front of the princes.
It may have been an accident, but somehow I felt it was my fault.
I should have waited or asked to be their nestqueen when we weren’t pressured for time.
Nevertheless, I was the one who severed the court bond from them and caused them so much turmoil. V’dim’s coloring was extremely off.
“V’dim… Z’fir… I am sorry.” I paused as Xylo wrapped an arm around me and pulled me close.
“I don’t know who told you what, but I didn’t mean to sever my court bonds with either of you—not after making such a display and working so hard to get your crew a new home.
” I took in a deep breath, letting it out slowly as I tried to sort through the words I wanted to say but didn’t know how to say.
“Mwe was trying to teach me how to strengthen my walls and repel others from within my shields. I didn’t know my temporary connections with the both of you would be harmed in any way, or I wouldn’t have attempted it.
My focus was on the task at hand, and with my exhaustion, I didn’t notice the disconnection,” I explained, squeezing Odelm’s hand tightly.
“It wasn’t my goal for any of this to happen…
and I don’t want you to think any ill thoughts from this incident. ”
“Zirene tried to explain what happened, filling in as many details as he could,” V’dim explained.
“He was surprised to hear from us so soon after we left.” Z’fir glanced at the nestmates sitting next to me for a moment before meeting my gaze once again. “Odelm and Xylo confirmed what happened, but it eases my mind hearing it from you.”
“Will you accept us again?” V’dim asked, his voice laced with a yearning.
I turned and faced Xylo. “Is it possible? Can a nestqueen reestablish a court bond with a male they recently rejected?”
“I don’t recall ever coming across such an event in the recorded medical history, but severed males are capable of bonding with another. Odelm is proof of that rare occurrence.”
“You’re saying there is hope, then?”
Xylo bobbed his head, pursing his mouth in thought. “I would give it a high possibility it can be done.” He locked his eyes with mine. “I don’t want to pressure you, but… it would probably give better results if you accepted their bonding spores and completely accepted them.”
“Would their bodies be… biologically prepared to do that?”
Xylo gazed behind me, moving his attention to Odelm.
“You still have a great need to protect and procreate, correct? Even after being severed for over five years, if Selena asked you to be her nestmate and complete the bond without hesitation, do you believe you would be able to do so?”
“Yes—without a doubt.”
Xylo nodded and turned to address the princes. Their faces seemed to have brightened some from the news. V’dim’s coloring was slowly returning to normal but remained dull, not its usual vibrancy.
“Then I don’t see why she can’t take you in once again.”
“Will you have us? Can we join your clan once more?” V’dim asked.
“You don’t have to take us if you don’t want to, Selena. We understand you only accepted us into your clan to protect us from our sisters and give our crew a place to call home.”
“We don’t want to pressure you…”
“Pressure?” I asked, not believing what they just said.
I stood up and walked toward the vid-screen, staring directly at the Circuli princes.
“Listen to me carefully… you will get here as quickly—and safely—as possible. And when you arrive, I will claim you in front of your crew if I have to. Do you hear me?”
“Selena…”
“No. Call me nestqueen because that is what I am, and your nestqueen wants you here as soon as possible.”