26 Evie
26 Evie
H ? i An, Vi ? t Nam
One little-known fact about Shanghainese actresses is that they are very light sleepers. As Evie sneaks into the room she
shares with Fen after her knee-shaking, thrill-inducing night with Adam, she stubs her toe on an armchair. She cringes and
swallows her cry of pain, but that doesn’t stop Fen from shooting out of bed like a rocket.
“And where were you last night, my sneaky little hussy?” Fen asks with just a hint of bleariness.
“Bathroom,” Evie answers, trying not to grin.
“For five hours?”
“I may have gotten waylaid.”
Like that, Fen is up and grabbing Evie’s arm. “By a certain grumpy CMO with rock-hard abs and a killer jawline?”
Evie doesn’t answer, but Fen shrieks in delight anyway. Laughing, Evie tries to shush her roommate, but Fen’s off, rambling
about love dungeons and raining condoms. She throws a robe in the air, like it’s a handful of confetti.
“I knew it, I knew it!” she crows. “You have the look of a very satisfied woman. But I’m not even a little surprised. I can
predict these things.”
“Like a sex prophet.”
“Oracle of orgasms!”
“Soothsayer of seduction!” Evie pipes in, rummaging through her suit case for an outfit that is casually cute yet subtly suggestive. Not enough to piss Adam’s parents off, but enough to summon that wonderful intensity.
“Clairvoyant of climaxes!” Fen yawns. “Or should it be clairvoyant of clitorises?”
“Can you not.”
“You have no appreciation for poetry.”
“Right. I’m the problem here. Anyway, I’m starved, so hurry it up,” Evie says, eventually landing on a black slip dress and
a pair of nude-colored sandals. She ties her hair into a loose bun.
“A night of nonstop bonking will do that to a woman. Go on without me. I could use an hour or two of extra sleep. I was in
the middle of a really good sex dream where Mei and I were on this Ferris wheel and—”
“ Bye , Fen.”
With a wave, Evie leaves Fen flopping back into her mess of sheets. This time, she finds her way without trouble to the dining
room in the main house, where breakfast is being served. Talia is deep in conversation with Mrs.Quy ? n, who only wears half her usual number of diamonds, along with a pair of thick sunglasses drawn over her face, though it
is a cloudy day and they are indoors. Talia gives Evie a quick wave as she passes, but Mrs.Quy ? n purses her lips and looks away.
O-o-kay. Perhaps last night’s confrontation isn’t quite forgiven yet. But no apologies before coffee. No apologies before talking
to Adam.
The other couples mill around the room, reaching for glasses of freshly squeezed juice and banana-leaf plates topped with
sticky rice in the shape of hearts. Evie takes a selection of fruit and a small portion of x?i with sugared peanuts. She can’t
help thinking that, in less than a week, she’ll be back in her apartment in Midland, staring into an empty pantry. Wondering
where the personal chef has gone. Has she gotten too caught up in this life? How does one conquer a romance hangover?
She tries not to think about the people she’ll be leaving behind, but it’s impossible not to dwell on the fact that she is leaving.
Evie notes with dismay that the last chair remaining is next to Ruby. Ruby, who wears a massive frown as she scrolls with one delicate finger through her iPad. Ruby, who looks wound up enough to detonate into an explosion of designer scarves and ancestral disappointment.
Evie slides silently into the empty chair and begins picking at her papaya. Ruby looks up then and, to Evie’s surprise, puts
away the iPad.
“Evie,” she says. Something in her voice makes Evie want to retreat, though Ruby is shooting her an approximation of a smile.
A gesture of goodwill, at least, which is more than Ruby has given her so far on the tour. “How are you this morning?”
Thinking of Adam’s lips last night, his fingers touching the soft, secret places of her, Evie begins to blush. “Pretty well,
Ruby. And you?”
“A little restless. I was thinking of taking a walk, actually. The beach is very peaceful in the morning. Would you go with
me?”
“Um. Me?”
“Yes, you,” Ruby says patiently.
Ruby gives Evie a purposeful eyebrow raise. On another person, it could look like an invitation. On Ruby, it looks like a
command. Evie shoves one last bite of papaya in her mouth and follows.
The sand is impossibly soft under their feet, and still slightly cool from the night air. Today, the water fades from turquoise
to a deeper blue that mirrors the overcast sky. A gentle breeze lifts the hair off Evie’s forehead. She sighs into it.
“Is it hard to believe you live here?” she asks. “In this incredible place?”
Ruby is surprised. “I don’t live here . I live in H ? Chí Minh City. With my husband.”
Evie blinks. The first voluntary mention of her husband. “And will your husband be joining us?”
Ruby laughs bitterly. “No. He and I lead separate lives.”
“That sounds... difficult.”
“I suppose. I’ve been busy building the company, but it started even before that.”
“I’m sorry.”
She shrugs. “I’m not. Honestly, that’s how it’s always been for marriages in our family. And it works fine. No fuss. No dramatics. Just a partnership.”
Evie watches the waves push against the sand. What a way to consider a marriage. Somehow, she doesn’t entirely believe Ruby.
The note of bitterness in the other woman’s voice clues her in to the fact that things aren’t nearly as drama-free as advertised.
Ruby goes on. “I heard you and my father exchanged some words last night.”
“One could say that.” Evie picks up a shell and palms it, feeling the grooves against her hand.
“Listen, Evie, I don’t blame you,” Ruby says, her voice taking on a confiding tone. “I know how frustrating my parents can
be. And you were raised differently. Perhaps it’s more comfortable for you to speak up. I’m not even saying you were wrong
to say something. I think it’s one of the reasons why my brother is drawn to you. Your fearlessness. But surely you must know
it can’t work. You and Adam?”
“What makes you so sure of that?” Evie furrows her brow. She wants to shut her ears against what comes next. Every step forward
is met with another shove backward. Another obstacle. Shouldn’t it be easier than this?
“Adam’s intentions are often opaque, even to him. He’s not one for sticking with a woman; before you, there were many, many
flings.”
“Many?” Evie flinches at the word.
“He’s still in love with his ex, Lana. He pretends he’s over it, but it’s no coincidence that he picks women who are unavailable.
Like the ones in H ? Chí Minh City, careless party girls who’d never demand anything of him. Like you—destined to return to America soon.”
Evie’s face reddens. How can Ruby’s perspective differ so wildly from Adam’s? Perhaps Ruby is really that clueless. Or perhaps
she sees something that Adam doesn’t want to admit to himself.
How well do he and Evie really know each other? There was time for all that, she had thought. But now, listening to Ruby’s pragmatic—if hurtful—words, she understands that the tour will come to a close soon. Too soon. And they are no closer to knowing how to resolve the simmering tension between them. How to move forward without one person sacrificing their whole life for the other, the surest recipe for resentment.
“Perhaps you should let your brother make his own decisions,” Evie says finally, her voice milder than she feels.
Ruby studies her. “But that’s not how it works in our family. We are all tied together, whether we want to be or not. Did
you know that our salaries are essentially paid by our father? That this whole company hinges on his approval?”
“I didn’t know.” Evie tries not to feel hurt that Adam has shared so little with her.
“Adam doesn’t like to acknowledge it, but he—we—owe our whole lives to our father. And if he chooses, he can take it all away.
This company. Our futures. He’s threatened to do just that if Adam doesn’t end things with you.”
“That’s ridiculous,” Evie says, puzzled. “Because of one little argument? He’d be that petty?”
“He doesn’t see it as petty. He sees it as protecting his children. His legacy. And I don’t know if he’s totally wrong. You’re
a nice person, Evie, but are you going to be Adam’s forever person? His wife ?”
“Say it with more disbelief, Ruby,” Evie drawls, even though she’s secretly hurt by the other woman’s tone.
“Well, do you see it? Yourself going to the family events in H ? Chí Minh City? Making conversation with all the people we grew up with? Finding a job here?”
When Evie tries to imagine it, she sees a big blank. But isn’t that how she’s always seen her future? Once, Auntie H ? o hired a palm reader to come to her house and read their palms. When the palm reader got to Evie’s, she lifted her hand and
dropped it as if it were burning. She tutted, This one has no idea what she wants. Her path is unreadable. Evie remembers this now, staring into Ruby’s challenging expression. She has nothing to say to dissuade this woman.
Ruby says triumphantly, “I didn’t think so. Isn’t it better to let him go now, before anyone gets hurt?”
But I don’t want to let him go. Evie thinks this, but doesn’t say it aloud, because really, what good would it do? None of his family approves of her, which
itself feels like a kind of rejection. How long can a relationship—a marriage—last, without the communal support of family
and friends? Isn’t that why she’s always chosen men who orbit her world? It’s simpler that way. But what more should she have
to surrender in the name of simplicity?
The tour group lounges on the beach under a row of huge red-and-white-striped umbrellas dug into the sand. Servers pass around
glasses of fresh coconut juice and salted lemonade, as well as smoothies crammed with tropical fruit. Everyone looks relaxed
and happy, as they should. All their needs are taken care of.
Evie should be relaxed too, but she can’t stop thinking about Ruby’s words. Would Adam’s father really take everything away,
just because his son disobeyed him? Would it be worth it? Would she be worth it?
She’s thinking of all this as Riley and Connor both stand at the same time. She adjusts her position to follow their gaze,
thinking they’ve seen either a large shrimp platter or a shark circling in the water. But it’s neither. A tall, gorgeous woman
with masses of dark hair, wearing a white halter with a sarong, picks her way across the sand. Though she’s graceful, her
steps are hesitant.
The goddess passes the gaping men and stops by Evie. In a low, sonorous voice, she asks, “Can you tell me where to find Fen?”
Evie turns to point Fen out, swimming with her boogie board near the shoreline. Fen glances at the beach and, after one look
at the mystery woman, drops her board onto the sand. She takes off like a dart toward them.
“Mei?” Fen calls, her voice shaking. Gaining speed. “My God, is that really you?”
“I couldn’t stay away,” Mei says softly. “Forgive me, Fen. I know we said we’d wait. But even a second without you is far too long.”
She’s holding Fen’s gaze, as if it’s just the two of them in this whole wide world. At first, silence falls when they are
in front of one another. Mei plays with the edge of her sarong as she watches Fen’s expression, a hint of worry on her face.
Then, with something like a sob, Fen launches herself into Mei’s arms. They’re both tearing up, planting soft kisses all over
one another. Evie looks away to give them privacy, but she can’t help the smile creeping onto her face at the sight of her
friend’s abundant joy. She feels like clapping.
The two walk away from the crowd, leaning close and ignoring the surrounding whispers. Breathing in the other’s presence in
the way that only two committed lovers can, with unhurried adoration.
“What the hell was that?” Connor asks, miffed, perhaps, that he never had a chance to practice his choicest lines on Mei.
“I think that was true love winning out,” Evie says, a little damp-eyed herself.
Later, Evie helps the reunited couple pack Fen’s bags. While Fen tosses everything inside her luggage haphazardly, Mei calmly
removes each item and folds it into a precise square before adding it back into the suitcase. She picks up the vibrator and
shakes her head, though she can’t help giving Fen a wry smile. A squeeze of the hand. They are always touching in some way,
whether Fen has her arm slung around Mei’s waist or Mei is leaning to plant a soft kiss on her girlfriend’s cheek. Their love
for each other is so palpable that no one makes a fuss when they announce their desire to leave the tour early. Even Ruby
with her keen eyes, her omnipresent frown, deigns to wish them good luck. After reminding Fen that her tour fee is nonrefundable.
Watching them, Evie feels a bittersweet joy. She’s glad to be sending her friend off with her love, but despondent to lose her favorite companion on the tour. Yet she can’t deny that the two women are a perfect match of opposites. While Fen is tumultuous energy and wild affection, Mei embodies a certain kind of steadiness, like a sweet breeze on a hot day. She’s gentle yet firm, never letting Fen get away with anything.
“You’ll text when you get back to H ? Chí Minh City?” Evie asks Fen.
“Oh, no, honey, we’re not going to H ? Chí Minh City. Thailand awaits!”
“Let’s just say: the destination is still a point of discussion,” Mei says, putting a hand on Fen’s arm.
“Oh, well, it doesn’t really matter, does it? As long as we’re together.” Fen’s expression is soft and unguarded. The kind
of look one can give when love is so certain, so inevitable, that it makes little sense to try to hide it.
Mei plants a kiss on her girlfriend’s cheek, grabs one of Fen’s bags, then gives Evie a wave. “I’ll put this in the car. It’s
nice to meet you, Evie. Thanks for keeping my girl out of trouble.”
When the door closes behind Mei, Evie smiles at her friend. “No wonder you’ve been pining over her. She’s probably the most gorgeous woman who’s ever walked the earth.”
“Duh,” Fen says smugly.
“I’m happy for you,” Evie says. “She’s great. And you glow when she’s nearby, like she’s your own personal heat lamp. You’re
glowing so much that I have half a mind to be annoyed at you. But I can’t.”
“Because I’m adorable?”
“Because you’re adorable.” Evie squeezes Fen tightly. “Go get deliciously baked in Thailand or Australia or wherever. Defy
your father and live out your dreams with your love, my soothsayer of seduction.”
“What are you going to do without me?”
“It’s not like you’re going into the witness protection program.”
Fen slings her remaining bag over her shoulder and gives Evie a wide, guileless smile. “Can I offer you some parting advice?”
“Why bother asking like you’re not just going to steamroll me with it?”
Fen says sagely, “Do as the Asian aunties do.”
“That was... not descriptive.”
“I mean—act like every day is your last. Brandish the condoms. Break into the temples. Do the things. Say whatever it is you want to say, and don’t let uptight fuckers like the Quy ? ns stop you.”
“Easy for you to say. You’re leaving in five minutes!”
“You ever think about why those aunties can do whatever the hell they want? It’s because they’ve mastered something most of
us spend our whole lives trying to learn. They’ve learned the art of not giving a fuck. They know that the only people they
have to live with are themselves. And who wants to live with regret as a bedfellow?”
“Shakespearean of you.”
Fen snaps her fingers loudly. “Pay attention, smart-ass. I’m saying, don’t let yourself sink with regret, Evie Lang. You’re
a dynamo, and once you see it in yourself, it’s only a matter of time before the whole world bows at your feet.”
“I really love you, Fen.” Evie pulls her friend close, bags and all.
“Back at you, my stealthy little hussy.”
With that, Fen leaves, vacuuming a great deal of the joy out of the room. Abandoning Evie to her thoughts. Her regrets, yes,
but also the memories of the best times on the trip. Memories crowded with Adam’s presence. Memories that somehow feel as
if they’re fading by the moment without the momentum to sustain them.
Sure, she and Adam have had some good times. Some very good times, actually. But what kind of future could they have together?
Evie needs to work. In the States. That’s her bread and butter. Her way to independence. Just the previous week, her agent
had emailed, saying that her invitation to a panel on grief and transference had been quietly rescinded. No explanation. Just
that they had no room anymore to host her. Her agent’s words were rough and brief, the kind you offer when you’re about to
drop a person. The world is forgetting about Evie. And that will not change if she decides to stay in Vi ? t Nam.
Not that Adam has asked her to stay, of course. San Francisco has always been the goal. And now it’s within reach. She just
needs to make the logical decision for once, instead of following her own stubborn, reckless heart.
Where has all that passion gotten her in the end?
Do as the aunties do.
As in times when things get hard—like when her father and Auntie H ? o died—Evie decides to get away for a while. She packs her notebook and a granola bar in a messenger bag and finds the Quy ? ns’ driver sleepily swinging in the hammock by one of the cars. It’s late afternoon, the hour when many Vietnamese are taking
their midday naps, shying away from the heat in the shade of their bedrooms. When the driver sees her, his feet hit the ground.
He smiles toothily.
“Ready to go into town?”
“Not quite. Do you have time to drop me off at the Marble Mountains?”