28. Loren Hale
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
LOREN HALE
My Nike soles sink into the sand, digging hard into the uneven surface as I run. The sun beats against my bare chest, and I hope that I sprayed enough lotion to avoid a nasty burn.
Even in the boiling heat, Ryke sprints beside me, keeping up with my lengthy stride.
I try to run every morning. It helps with my cravings, especially in Cancun.
I can’t take one step out of our hotel room without seeing a sloshed college student or a bottle of beer.
Seventeen bars are on this resort alone.
I knew coming here would test me to the limit, but I never anticipated how I would feel.
Yesterday with Lily was literally the only day that alcohol never crossed my mind.
Not once. We snorkeled with the turtles and climbed to the top of a Mayan ruin.
She never asked me for sex, and I never craved a drop of whiskey.
But that was one good day out of many shitty ones.
I want to improve our statistics, to lessen all the bad days until they’re nothing but a dream.
I push harder, the humid air squeezing my lungs. Sweat beads my skin, and the pain that ripples through my muscles feels better than my nagging thoughts. So I keep driving farther. I keep bending my knees and pumping forward. And Ryke never breaks from my side.
I know that if I didn’t care so much about Lily—or have Ryke here to glare at me—I would have already broken my sobriety. And then Connor makes me want to be a better person—however lame that sounds.
But today we all split up .
Lily is shopping with Rose and Connor, which gives her a break from obsessing over having sex. Surrounding ourselves with other people is still new for us, and kind of exhausting, but we’re making it work.
I glance over my shoulder, and we slow down to a jog almost immediately.
Melissa and Daisy are barely a speck in the distance.
They were the only two that wanted to join us on a run.
Unsurprising, since Lily looks like the Big Bad Wolf huffing and puffing after a minute sprint, and I’ve never seen Rose wear sneakers in her life.
Connor would have come along, but he didn’t want to leave Rose and Lily shopping alone in Mexico.
Our feet slow to a complete stop. “Connor’s investigator still hasn’t come up with anything new?” Ryke asks, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand, shirtless like me.
“Connor says he’s looking into it as quickly as he can.” And if his contacts don’t pan out, hopefully my father has better luck. But I wouldn’t tell Ryke that I’m talking to Jonathan Hale. Nothing good can come from that.
“Let’s say, worst case scenario, it gets leaked that Lily is a sex addict,” Ryke says, uncapping his water bottle as we wait for the girls to catch up to us. “What happens then?”
My stomach churns at the thought. “I don’t even want to entertain the idea.
” All I picture is Lily sobbing and unable to be consoled.
Watching her in that kind of gutted agony would kill me, but if we do go down that road, I can’t resort to booze.
For once, I have to be there for her. She’s my best fucking friend.
And she deserves the type of guy who can make her feel better, not worse.
If I can’t do that, then we really shouldn’t be together.
Ryke studies me. “You still taking Antabuse?”
I give him a bitter smile. “One pill a day keeps the demons at bay.”
“You didn’t answer me.”
“Yes, Dad.” I stretch my muscles, pulling my arm over my chest, trying to relieve this built-up pressure. If the pill bottle wasn’t in my pocket—if I had left it in my suitcase with the other stolen luggage—I would have more temptations to drink. I was lucky for once.
I also hate talking about that medication. Talking makes me think and thinking makes me want to fucking drink.
“I wish you would have told me about Mason Nix sooner,” Ryke admits, changing the subject once again, this time to one of our top suspects.
Ryke is good at that—talking and revolving around different topics.
I find myself zoning into something, being immersed by his roundabout discussions like a whirlpool.
“Why is that?”
“We share the fucking gym at Penn. I see him almost every day. If I knew what he did, I wouldn’t have…tolerated him.”
“So what does you not tolerating him look like?” I ask with furrowed brows. I picture him ramming his fist into Mason Nix’s conceited face. Granted, I already did that.
“We may have had words,” Ryke says.
I still imagine a fist fight.
“You know,” I mutter, staring at my water bottle, “for the longest time after our freshman year, I kept thinking that I was in the wrong. I can’t even tell you how many tires I slit.
And Lily told me that she didn’t expect what happened that night, but she didn’t mind it either.
” I shake my head, thinking back to our first year at Penn.
We both went to a frat party, the entire soccer team in attendance.
Most of it is still a giant blur. But I do remember hearing guys near the kitchen discussing some girl on the second floor.
Someone named Mason convinced a freshman to screw each guy on the soccer team.
One after the other.
I didn’t have to be told it was her. I just knew.
I grabbed a bottle of Jim Beam, pulled out my serrated hunting knife, and paced manically in the parking lot. I lost it on any car with a fucking soccer sticker, badge, identification, whatever. They would have to find another ride home.
That morning, she was dazed and hung over, but somehow I pulled the truth from her. Mason Nix asked if she wanted to have the night of her life, and she agreed as long as no one watched. As long as each guy came in and went out like a factory line.
It was one of her fantasies, she told me.
And it came true, but I saw how much shame gnawed on her after that.
She shrunk into herself and waited for me to stare at her like she was gross and dirty.
But I just wanted to hold her and tell her that she was worth so much more than whatever she was searching for.
But I was a selfish prick back then. I wasn’t willing to change our dynamic just yet. I thought if she overcame her addiction, then she’d make me overcome mine.
And now that’s all I want for us.
“I remember how you explained it,” Ryke says.
“But fuck that, Lo. I didn’t know Lily before you two became a couple, but it doesn’t matter if she wanted it or not.
No self-respecting man would offer something like that to a girl, especially one that’s drunk.
You had every right to be upset and go after the asshole. ”
“Yeah…maybe.” But now Mason Nix could be the one terrorizing Lily.
Melissa bounds over in a steady jog, not winded in the least. She’s closer and closer to us, but Daisy doesn’t run beside her. My stomach knots, and I scan the beach quickly. I couldn’t have already lost Lily’s sister. It’s barely been an hour.
“Ryke…” I slap his arm and gesture to Melissa who’s alone.
Ryke searches the beach with a hard gaze, on alert. But we don’t show panic. We both look like we’re about ready to enter a UFC match, muscles flexing, spine straightening. Must be a Hale thing .
He taps my shoulder and points to a spot by the shore where the waves lap into the sand. I can barely make out the head of a tall blonde, chatting up two local guys who carry strings of jewelry looped on their arms.
Shit.
Before I can even move a foot, Ryke has taken off.
I follow close behind, hoping he doesn’t antagonize the locals.
That image that I had of protecting Daisy—yeah, I thought the fight would be between drunk, stupid guys.
But these two probably wouldn’t mind whipping out a knife if things turn heated.
I don’t want to be thrown in jail in a foreign country without a fucking passport.
Luckily, Ryke slows once we reach them, his eyes dead-set on Daisy, not the guys.
I join them as Daisy holds up two chain necklaces with silver Mayan coins on the ends. “These are supposedly handmade. I can’t tell though.” She shrugs. “I think I’m going to take Pablo’s word for it.”
My gaze drifts to the two Mexican guys, standing passively back with their backpacks and strings of jewelry, skin dark and weathered from walking up and down the beach.
They look harmless, and I have a suspicion that Daisy approached them first. She’s a little wilder than I remember.
Crazy, even. I’ve missed so much since rehab—or maybe she’s always been like this and I was just too drunk to really notice.
“You can’t run off and talk to strangers,” I tell her. It sounds stupid and parental—nothing I would normally say. When did I become a person who lectures someone else on responsibility? Fuck—I’m turning into Rose.
“We’re not strangers,” Daisy says quickly. “That’s Pablo and…” She squints in thought. “Ernesto…I think.”
The bigger set guy nods at this and holds out a plastic bag to Daisy, filled with more pendants and stones. “Onyx. Rubies. Sapphires. ”
I narrow my gaze. “Do you have a gold brick in their too?”
Ryke catches Daisy’s wrist and tugs her to his side. She shrugs off Ryke’s hold, and her eyes flicker behind her. “Melissa is glaring at you.”
Ryke doesn’t even check over his shoulder. “Don’t worry about her.” Melissa is about twenty feet away, arms crossed over her chest, waiting for Ryke to rejoin her. But he’s abandoned his girlfriend to help me with this situation. I won’t admit it out loud, but I’m pretty thankful.
“I’m just trying not to get you in trouble,” Daisy tells him.
“I can take care of myself.” His eyes bore into hers.
I cut in, “Daisy, let’s go.”
“Wait,” she says, raising her hand to show off the two necklaces. “Which one do you think Lily would like?” And now I feel like an ass. She just wanted to buy her sister jewelry.