Chapter 41
TRAVIS
“We have a media interview in an hour, don’t be late,” Tanner says, looking at me pointedly.
I sigh, I’m tired of him giving me shit. I was late to one interview last week. Big fucking deal. The world didn’t end, they still got their questions and wrote their precious article.
“I’m going to grab some food, anyone want anything?” Liam asks, heading for the door of the venue we’re playing in tonight. Another club show that’s projected to sell out, according to Calvin.
“Wait!” Ellie comes rushing in. “Can I talk to you guys first?”
Liam stops mid-stride and makes his way back to the stage where the rest of us are still standing. “Everything ok?” he asks her, and I don’t like the concern on his face or the tone he’s using. Are they besties now or something?
Ellie fidgets—something so unlike her—and then plasters on a smile I could tell from Mars is fake.
“Yeah, I was hoping to run something by you all.” Her eyes flick to me for a millisecond before they land on Liam again.
“Uh, I was wondering, if it would be ok if I came back on the bus? The crew bus is fine, but a tad crowded and—”
“Sur—” Liam starts, but is cut off by Calvin, appearing from nowhere.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he snarks, and the desire to fuck him up hits me square in the chest.
Ellie’s eyes narrow his way, her jaw clenching.
“Of course you can come back,” I say, shooting Calvin a death glare that has him shrinking back to whatever hole he crawled out of.
Ellie’s gaze finds mine, but instead of seeing gratefulness or even a tiny smile, she’s wearing a blank expression.
As if I’m not doing her a favor by speaking up and welcoming her back.
I mean, I have the final say since I’m the one who technically kicked her off in the first place.
I hadn’t meant to do it for real. I didn’t know she’d take it so seriously.
“As long as there’s no drama and everyone can get along,” Tanner says, staring at me, with what I know is his warning glare. “Then I don’t see an issue.”
“Thank you,” Ellie says, smiling at Tanner like he’s her fucking savior.
Everyone starts scrambling, heading out to grab food.
Ellie speed walks toward the exit and I stride after her. “Ellie, wait.”
“I need to get my stuff,” she says over her shoulder, not slowing down. She may be short compared to me, but she’s a fast walker.
“Wait a damn minute would you,” I bite out, reaching out and tugging her back by her elbow.
“Whatever it is, I’m sure it can wait.” She attempts to break free. I don’t let go, and she gives up. “Fine, what?”
I drop her arm and cross mine over my chest. “You’re welcome.”
Her brows pinch together tightly. “For?”
I jerk my head behind us. “What just happened back there.” Did she forget already?
She glances behind me, working out what I’m talking about. When it hits her, she purses her lips into a snarky little grin. “You want me to thank you?” Her head tilts to the ceiling and she barks out a laugh, not waiting for my answer. She folds over, clutching her stomach, laughing hysterically.
My blood starts to heat up. “Something funny?”
She straightens, her laughter cutting off just as fast as it came. “Holy shit, you’re serious.”
“I could keep you off the bus,” I state, then internally kick myself.
What the fuck am I doing? I want her back on the bus.
I’ve done everything but drop to my knees and beg her.
I sent her goddamn donuts trying to show her how sorry I was.
I didn’t even get a ‘thank you.’ Instead, she brought them to rehearsal the next day and passed them out to the guys, taking ‘thanks’ that should’ve been mine.
Yet, here I am being a dick for no reason. Just because I like getting under her skin. Her fire gets me hot.
She leans in, jabbing a finger into my chest. “You’re a dick.”
With one quick check behind us to make sure everyone cleared the building, I snatch her wrist, dragging her into my body and getting in her face.
Her scent invades my senses, and I breathe it in.
Her closeness brings a familiar feeling filtering through me that I try not to think too hard about.
“No, but I have a dick, and he misses you.”
Her nostrils flare as she tries to pull away. “Let me go,” she grits.
“I can’t.” But as the words leave my lips, I drop her hand like it’s on fire and step back.
I clear my throat, eyes shifting away from hers.
“I’ll see you on the bus,” I say, then walk as fast as I can out of the building.
The crisp air slams into my face, and I desperately suck it in, trying to fill my tightening lungs.
What the shit was that? I meant it sexually, not any other way. Surely she knows that.
I just meant…fuck.
Ellie’s being weird as shit. She’s been back on the bus exactly one day and hasn’t said a single word to me.
That’s not the weird part, though. Normally she works at the kitchen table or the main living area on her laptop or phone.
Of course, the table is slightly broken after the events of my arrest but it’s still usable.
Yet, she’s stayed hidden in her bunk away from everyone.
She rarely hides there unless she’s taking a nap.
I’ve wanted to sneak back there and see what her problem is, but I probably already know. Me.
I sit next to Liam on the couch. “Hey.”
“Hey.”
“Have you talked to Ellie lately?”
He eyes me warily. “No.”
“I think you should. I think something’s bothering her.”
He frowns. “Then why don’t you talk to her?”
I give him a look that should state the obvious. Because I’m the problem.
He sighs. “Fine.” He hops off the couch and my eyes bug out. “What?”
“I didn’t know you’d jump right up.”
His lips thin into a straight line, and I throw my hands up. “Sorry. Go on.”
He walks toward her bed, shaking his head.
I drum my fingers on my thigh, watching the clock on the wall tick. Minute after minute passes by. Feels like he’s been back there forever. Are they having a therapy session? I didn’t actually think she’d talk to him.
Just as I’m about to get up and march back there, Penn sits down. We still haven’t had “the talk” yet and I know it must be eating at him. I’ve avoided it because I don’t like lying to his face, it’s hard. He stares into your goddamn soul until he finds the truth.
After my arrest and shit blew up, he let me have my space. He’s been waiting for me to come to him. I usually do when I need something, but there’s nothing he can do for me this time.
I don’t even know what it is I need. Maybe just to get off this bus and away from Ellie and all these damn feelings.
When she’s gone, she’s all I think about.
I’m agitated, restless. Anxious, wondering what she’s doing.
When she’s near, she invades all my senses and she doesn’t even realize it.
I feel at ease, but I also can’t think straight.
I go from one extreme to the next. She’s just as fucking addicting as this goddamn Adderall, except I want Ellie in my system.
I’d welcome her into my veins. She’s the high I don’t ever wanna come down from. And that just pisses me off.
“How you holding up?” Penn asks.
My brow arches in question, and he stares back at me. I blink, and so does he. Then both his brows lift, a smirk twitching the corner of his mouth. I growl, and his smirk turns into a smug smile. Dick.
“If you’re referring to the female on the bus, I’m fine. Peachy, actually.” I glance at the clock again, it’s been eight minutes. What are they talking about?
“I wasn’t referring to that. Damn, you make everything about her, don’t you?”
My head whips to him. “Like hell I do. I only assumed because it’s new.”
“It’s not new. She was on the bus for weeks.”
“Well, then she wasn’t. So it’s new again.”
“You can’t talk circles around me, and you know it.”
I scrub my hand across my face, facial hair pricking my palm. I can’t remember the last time I shaved. Or, fuck, the last time I messed with my hair. Damn, do I still look good?
“I’ve given you time, but eventually you have to talk to me.”
“Why? I thought we settled everything. I’m good.” My eyes drift away from him when I say it. I get nauseous when I lie to him.
“We knew touring was going to be rough. But you said you could handle it.”
My jaw ticks. “I can. I am handling it.”
“I hope that’s true. You remember what happened to Davis.
” My shoulders go rigid. Of course I remember.
It’s been like five or six years now. When I don’t respond, he continues.
“Dude thought he could casually take Adderall, but it backfired, didn’t it?
He got addicted even though he swore he wasn’t.
Then he went straight to meth, and what happened? ”
My teeth grind together.
“Fucking blew himself up cooking that shit. And who found him? His girl. Eight months pregnant, and had to deal with the aftermath.” Penn shakes his head, and my gut churns.
Yeah, that was fucked up. But I’m not going to start smoking meth.
Not to mention, I haven’t gotten anyone pregnant. That poor girl. I hope she got therapy.
I really do have it under control. I’ll stop soon. “Yeah, I remember,” I grit. How could I forget? We’d known Davis since seventh grade. Super cool guy who came to all of our backyard gigs and always brought us beer and pizza.
“I don’t want to see that happen to my best friend.” His voice is so serious I have to turn and face him. His eyes are hard, but the fear is there, too, and I swallow bile I’m sure is going to come up.
“It’s not going to,” I assure him.
Laughter from the back of the bus breaks our staring contest.
It’s been twelve minutes now. What the shit is so funny?
I clap a hand on Penn’s shoulder and squeeze, then head back there to find out for myself.
Ellie’s bunk is at the end. We try to give her as much privacy as possible when she’s here.
I round the corner and immediately stiffen when I see her curtain closed.
Their hushed giggles penetrate my ears, and my blood pressure soars.
My steps waver. I consider turning around and stewing in the main room.
Or I could tear the curtain off the hook and see what the fuck is going on.
“Gosh, it’s so soft.” Liam’s voice is nearly a whisper.
My heart beats hard, sweat coating my skin. What’s so soft?
“We can’t tell anyone.” Ellie’s voice is desperate.
I reach for the wall, my knees threatening to buckle.
“Why not?”
“Tanner will freak out and kick us both off the bus.”
I wipe the sweat from my brow. I knew it. They are fucking. I thought I was being crazy and paranoid, but my gut is never wrong.
“I don’t know. He might be ok with it. What’s it hurting?”
Lurching forward, I grip my thighs to steady myself. Either Tanner is driving like a moron, which is doubtful, or this bus is about to drop an axle.
“It’s not hurting anything but…”
“They’re going to find out, Ellie,” Liam says soothingly.
“I know, but we can keep it a secret a little longer. I mean, just touch her one more time and—”
Touch her?! Hell no.
I can’t take it anymore. I yank the curtain with so much force, the clips go flying. Ellie shrieks, and Liam jumps so high his head slams off the wall.
“What the fu—” My mouth snaps shut as my eyes land on the most precious lil’ thing I’ve ever seen.
An orange ball of fur sits curled up in Ellie’s lap. A fucking cat.
An exhale escapes my lungs, relief flooding me. It’s a kitten. That’s what they were talking about.
Wait. What?
“What the hell, Travis!?” Ellie shifts, attempting to shield me from the miniature tiger, but it’s too late.
“Where’d this baby come from?” I reach out and stroke its fur. Its paw comes out, smacking my hand. “Hey, what the hell?”
“You probably scared her.” Ellie looks at the cat. “It’s nice to see you have some fight instincts, though. You’re a bit spicy, huh, girl? I like that.”
“I’m sorry.” My hand comes out, more gently this time, and the kitten comes up, sniffing me. “What’s her name?”
“I haven’t decided yet. Wanted to see more of her personality. I’ve only had her for a day and a half.”
“She’s cute.” The cat finally accepts me and allows me to pet her. I pick her up, and she rubs her face against mine, purring like crazy. “That’s my girl,” I coo.
“Excuse me? Uh, no. She’s my girl.” Ellie reaches for her, but I turn away.
“Where’d you find her?” I flick my eyes to Ellie, who’s glaring at me, jealous that I’m already her favorite, no doubt.
“Someone abandoned her in an alley by a coffee shop. I couldn’t leave her. I—”
“Of course you couldn’t.” What kind of monster would abandon a tiny, helpless animal?
Her brow furrows. “Right. But Tanner is going to freak when he finds out. It’s why I had to come back. Caleb’s allergic to cats.”
I ignore the sting from that bit of knowledge. She didn’t come back because she wanted to; she came back because she had to.
Oh well, she’s here. That’s all that matters.
“We can’t hide her for long,” Liam adds, still rubbing his head.
“Don’t worry about Tanner. He’ll get over it,” I say. Sure, he’ll be pissy as fuck, but we’ll put it to a vote. At the very least, Ellie, Liam, and I will all vote yes. I don’t see Penn caring either way. So we win.
End of story.