Chapter 11 #3
Caius snorts, and when I glance at him out of the corner of my eye, I catch the hint of a crooked grin.
Rui gives me a look like he knows he’s missing the joke, but I shrug, not interested in elaborating.
“What is this?” I lift the glass, then bring it to my lips for another drink, savoring the way it burns on the way down.
Rui lifts the opaque earthenware bottle and fills our cups again. “Arisi?irum, it’s fermented from rice and glow berries. Do you like it?” Rui looks up at me through thick dark lashes, and the heat in my stomach builds.
“I do.” I reach for my glass. Caius reaches for my arm, trying to stop me, but I shrug him off and lift my glass for a toast. I can feel Caius glaring at me, but my focus is on Rui. He locks eyes with me again, then clinks his glass against mine before we both finish another round.
“Tell me about the dishes.” I shift the conversation to safer ground.
Dom perks up, listening intently as Rui describes the produce for the meal, and I wonder how much of The Above is represented in their delicacies, the dining hall, the city.
I want to ask more, but Caius’ warning rings in my mind, and for once, I decide he’s right and try to tread lightly with my questions.
After the meal, Rui sends one of his men to secure lodgings for our party.
He leads us across a series of rope bridges that make my pulse race and my shoulders tense.
My pace is embarrassingly slow, but finally we arrive at a far cavern wall and exit onto the stable ground of the tunnels.
We follow the winding path, the tunnels cut wide for regular use by the bustling metropolis, though we see fewer and fewer people the deeper we go.
The diamond-shaped panels overhead end as the tunnel opens up into a wide cavern, terraced with azure pools that stretch through the space, soft steam billowing up toward a carpet of glow moss overhead.
Rui hands me a fluffy wrapped bundle from a stack by the cavern entrance. His fingertips linger on mine a moment.
Caius clears his throat, but when Rui keeps his gaze locked on mine, Caius shoulders past the man to toss the bundled towels and robes to Dom and Cressida.
“These are the community pools,” Rui says, but his eyes drift to another passage.
“And over there?” I ask, following his gaze.
“Just off the main to the left are the women’s pools. The next juncture to the right will take you to the men’s pools. And…” Rui’s voice trails off, and even in the soft glow of the caverns, I think I see pink blush across his cheeks.
“And?” I ask, biting my lower lip and looking up through my lashes at him, the arisi?irum buzzing in my veins making me bold.
I know where his mind has wandered, but I want him to tell me.
It’s been a long time since I felt desired.
Most men keep their distance from the daughter of a traitor, and given what had happened to my father…
it’s for the best. It was hard to trust again after the person you gave your heart to sent your father to his death.
Rui steps closer and tilts his head, dropping his voice low.
“There is a honeycomb of more private chambers.” Tentatively, he runs his fingertips from my shoulder, over the line of my arm, trailing goosebumps behind his touch until his fingertips reach mine.
He pauses there, a question in the gentle touch.
Warmth pools in my belly, followed in sharp contrast with the feeling of ice, unease crawling over my skin.
Cressida roughly locks her elbow with mine and yanks me toward the tunnel.
“Thanks! We’ll be in the women’s pools.” She half drags me past the cavern entrance.
I flash Rui an apologetic look, and I swear I see smoke billowing off Caius in the shadows.
He stands menacingly behind Rui, sending chills crawling down my spine before the tunnel bends and they disappear from view.
I let Cressida tow me along to the women’s pools. This cavern is smaller than the first we entered, but there are still at least ten pools carved into the rock, and to my relief, we are alone.
“What was that?” I hiss as I begin unlacing my boots.
“Best not to tempt fate,” Cressida replies.
I furrow my brow in response. What in the name of the gods could she be talking about?
Cressida cocks her head to the side and not for the first time, the gesture reminds me of a feline observing her prey. “You really don’t know?”
I shake my head and turn away from her to finish disrobing. “Know what?” I ask over my shoulder.
“You are a lot of things, Oliviana, but stupid is not one of them.”
I slide into one of the pools, the heat a balm to my travel-worn muscles, sinking until the water envelops me.
My eyes shut, I let the darkness take me, the silence folding me into its embrace.
My hair lifts and my muscles ease, and for that moment, I am weightless.
I hold the air in my lungs, pretending that I need nothing more than what I have.
In this moment I am whole. I tell myself the lie again and again until my lungs burn and beg me to break.
I push past the pain, finding pleasure in the control, just a little longer, then I accept that I must surface and face reality.
The air hits my skin in cool contrast to the heat of the pool, and I gasp in a clean breath of fresh air.
New beginnings are always so satisfying.
I wish we could have a new beginning, me and Caius, but then my gut twists at the treacherous thought.
There are no new beginnings. Our past makes up the foundation of the tapestries of our lives, woven over years of living, of choices, and actions.
Caius made his choice. He snipped his thread from mine years ago, leaving a hole, a scar in the picture of my life that will never heal.
New threads will be woven, new stories told, but no, no one can change the past, and it’s dangerous to forget.
I press the heels of my hands hard into my eyes; sparks dance behind my eyelids, and then I wipe the water away. When I open my eyes, I find Cressida in the pool next to mine, her elbows folded over the stone wall between us, her chin propped on her arms as she studies me.
“You can feel him, can’t you?” she asks.
Feel him? Yes, I can feel him, grinding on my nerves, wearing me down, ever present.
I don’t want to talk about Caius; I don’t want to think about Caius.
Why wouldn’t this insufferable woman let me have a moment alone with a man who knew nothing of my past in a city that knew nothing of my father and his betrayal?
But Cressida is as relentless as her brother, her pale blue gaze boring into me until I crack.
I shrug. “Maybe.”
“Listen, if you don’t want trouble while we are here, I’d suggest you keep your distance from Rui.”
My anger flares. “Who are you to tell me—”
Cressida raises a hand. “I don’t care who you bed. Hells bed Caius, if it will make you feel better.”
I snort at the insinuation. But the way she looks at me makes me wonder how much more she sees than I want her to. “But my brother is a jealous man. If you do pursue your new friend, I wouldn’t put it past him to cause trouble.”
“Caius has no claim on me.”
“Does he know that?” Cressida smirks.
I set my jaw and tip back in the pool to study the glow moss overhead.
While the intensity here is muted, the plants look vibrant and healthy.
My gut clenches as the severity of our quest comes to my forethought.
It isn’t just Bǎodela…The Below is dying, and we are quibbling over boys.
No, Caius has no claim on me, and we both know it, but right now there is nothing more important than saving our home… it’s bigger than that now.
If there is really something to explore between Rui and me, we can discover what that is after we’ve found the hatching grounds.
I float on my back until the tension leaches from my shoulders and thighs, trying to let go of the weight of the past that plagues me, an overstuffed pack I can’t seem to set down.