Logan
Chapter twenty-five
“That shit never gets any easier,” Cain groans, dropping down on the station’s living room couch.
“If it were easy, I’d be worried that you were losing touch with humanity,” I say, sitting on the other end and tossing him a bottle of water from the fridge before pulling out my phone to text Tessa.
I have never had an issue with our work schedule before.
There are plenty of stations that don’t give their crews as much time off as us, but it’s been two days since I’ve seen my girl, and it’s driving me a bit crazy.
Me: Hey, darlin’. Just wanted to let you know I’m back at the station. Had to step out on a call, but we are all good.
I’m sure, given the time, she’s either getting ready to leave the diner or she’s already on her way to pick up Jake from school.
I’m on the tail end of my two-day shift, and I’m more than ready to have the next three off.
I’ve been texting with Tessa as much as possible, but this last call took longer than anticipated.
Knowing what she has been through, I don’t want her worrying about me if I can help it.
The last call that came in was for our behavioral health crisis team, which Cain and I are part of.
Unlike emergency calls, this one came in directly to our station’s phone.
Some of the calls we get come from people who are simply looking for someone to talk to and aren’t in need of medical assistance.
This guy was looking for exactly that. He said he felt alone, like he didn’t have anyone in his life who would understand him and the inner demons he’s battling.
Cain is the one who answered the call, and after a few minutes on the phone, he decided a wellness-check was the best course of action.
He didn’t answer the door right away, but when he finally did, we knew immediately that Cain had made the right decision.
We were there for a while, spending most of the time talking and evaluating his level of distress to determine whether or not a seventy-two-hour long involuntary hold was necessary.
He declined any sort of hospital transport, but based on our observations and what he said, he wasn’t at risk of harming himself or others. He simply needed someone to talk to.
I can’t say for sure if we helped, but I would like to think we did.
He seemed in desperate need of giving voice to some of what was going on in his head.
Toward the end of the visit, we were chatting with the guy like we were all old friends, and it seemed to lift his spirits.
We provided him with a few resources should he feel the need for them.
Hartridge is a small enough town that most people are familiar with their neighbors and the business owners and know when someone is just passing through.
That’s not the case for everyone, and I hate knowing there’s someone in this town who is struggling, especially if there’s a way we can help.
Now that we know where this guy lives, we need to make it a point for one of us to do a follow-up check in a few days.
My phone chimes in my hand, and I glance down to see a text from the woman who has been occupying my every waking thought.
And my dreams.
Darlin: Hi, Lo. Thanks for telling me! I’m picking up Jake & then we’re heading home.
Darlin: We’d love to have you join us for dinner if you can.
Lo. That nickname has no business stirring up a wave of emotion in my chest. The only other person who has ever called me that is Luke, but he hasn’t used the nickname since we were kids.
How can a simple name bring me such a sense of peace and belonging?
It’s crazy to think I moved to Hartridge, not just to be closer to my brother, but to find a community.
It’s something that was greatly missing from my life in the city.
Back then, the hours were grueling, and we rarely went a shift without dealing with a major emergency.
Even if we had time to do things outside of work, the mental and emotional toll that the job took often left me feeling like a shell of a human.
The crew here at Hartridge F.D. not only has begun to feel like a family but the community has as well.
Granted, we still train and keep everything ready to go in case we are pulled away to handle an actual fire, but we also handle the type of calls I would have laughed at back in the city.
Like replacing batteries in smoke detectors for those who can’t do it themselves, only to spend forty-five minutes chatting with them while they insist I try a piece of cake they baked.
And we actually have the time to do things like firehouse tours for Scouts who are working toward earning a badge.
I may have loved the rush of adrenaline that came with nearly every shift in the city, but the slower pace of working in his town is exactly what I needed.
Still, as much as I love it, I would give almost anything to be able to spend the rest of the evening with Tessa and her son.
A smile curls over my lips as I tap out a response.
Me: I wish I could join you. I’ve still got a couple of hours left here.
Suddenly, a throw pillow comes flying toward me and knocks my phone from my hand as Cain’s laughter fills the room.
“The fuck, man?” I laugh, grabbing it and throwing it back at him.
“You’re sure smiling an awful lot these days for a guy who was in a deep ass rut when I first met him,” he says, tossing it aside.
“Guess that’s true,” I concede.
His brows furrow as his head cocks to the side. “You’re smitten.”
My head drops back against the back of the couch as I laugh, running my palm over my face. “Smitten. Really? Is that what we’re calling it these days?”
“You got a better word for a guy who stares at his phone with hearts in his eyes?”
“Who has hearts in their eyes?” Kinsley asks, strolling in from the bay. She braces her hands on the back of the couch, glancing between us.
Cain tips his chin in my direction. “Bennett over here. He’s got it bad.”
“For Tessa, the woman we ran into at the grocery store?” she asks, standing back and folding her arms over her chest. Concern is written across her face.
“We met at The Stampede before that. Been seeing each other since.” I would say she’s my girlfriend, but when you’re in your thirties like we are, that term feels a little lacking. “Speaking of, what was with your warning about hopin’ I know what I’m doing?”
She rolls her lips inward as her gaze flicks to Cain, then settles back on me. “I’ve lived in this town most of my life. I just… Tessa has been through a lot. She doesn’t need someone who’s going to mess with her heart or her head.”
My first instinct is to be offended by what she says.
Is that what she thinks I’m doing? I haven’t known anyone here all that long, and I sure as fuck haven’t done anything to warrant any of them thinking I would get involved with her for the sake of messing around.
But then I let the tone of her voice and the hesitation behind her words sink in.
“I know exactly what she’s been through, and I would never do anything to purposely harm her or her kid,” I say confidently.
“She told you? You… know everything?” Kinsley’s careful with her words, like she doesn’t want to overstep and say something she shouldn’t.
“Yeah.” My shoulders slump as I lean back and rub my palms down my thighs.
“She told me about Ryan and the accident. She has done an amazing job at raising that kid on her own, and I know she doesn’t need me.
They both seem to be doin’ just fine. But I haven’t been able to stay away from her since I met her, and after getting to know them over the last couple of months, I don’t think I can stay away. ”
“Damn, man,” Cain cuts in. “But, I mean, are you ready for it? You’d be that boy’s stepdad if things get serious.”
“Yeah,” Kinsley agrees as she walks around the couch, moving to face me. “Have you thought about that at all? The last thing either of them needs is for him to get attached only for you to decide it’s too much to handle.”
I can appreciate where they’re both coming from, but fuck if it isn’t starting to annoy me.
Even if they do have a point. But is anyone ever truly ready to be a parent?
I mean, some people are definitely better parents than others, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they were any more prepared than those who aren’t as great.
I know for a fact Tessa wasn’t prepared to become a single mom, but they're the cards life dealt her. She had no choice but to persevere.
“I mean… I can’t say for sure if I’m ready or not, but it’s all I’ve been thinking about lately. I’m all in with her.” I glance between the two of them. “She’s well on her way to stealing my heart, and I know the two of them are a package deal. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
My phone vibrates from its place on the couch beside me, and my heart kicks when the nickname I’ve saved her number under flashes across the screen.
Darlin: You should stop by when you get off.
Warmth floods my chest at her offer. It will be well past dinner time by the time I’m out of here. I would feel bad showing up that late in the evening, but I’m also not going to deny her offer when I already feel like I haven’t seen her all week despite it having only been two days.
Like she can read my mind, another text comes through, and I chuckle as I read it.
Darlin: I’d really like to see you, Lo. Even if it’s late.
Me: You sure?
Darlin: Mhm. Just text me when you get here.
Me: You got it, baby.
Lifting my hips, I slip my phone into my front pocket and finally tune back in to the conversation happening around me.
“We could see about The Stampede hosting. That place is plenty big enough for a community-wide event,” Kinsley offers, but I have no idea what she’s talking about.
“We’re planning events now?” I ask.
Cain stands from the couch and stretches his arms above his head for a moment before he says, “I was just telling her about the call we got today and how it would be nice to put on some kind of event to get the town together. If we did some advertising and gave people enough notice, I’m sure we’d get a decent turnout.
Might give people a reason to come out and socialize.
I hate thinking that we’ve got neighbors who are suffering in silence. Seems like a good way to help.”
It’s not a bad idea. And it’s exactly the kind of thing that draws people to towns like Hartridge to begin with, myself included.
Living in a small town where everyone is in each other’s business can be annoying at times, but it’s also nice to think that they would all come together to support one another.
After all, wasn’t I just thinking about how I hated knowing that someone here was suffering and wishing there was a way we could help? This might be the perfect thing.
“We could post it all over the station’s socials,” I say.
Our fire department didn’t have much of a social media presence for a while, but in the last year or so, Kinsley and one of the other volunteers on the crew have been working to build it up.
They both swear it brings awareness to the town and helps those who live here feel closer to us, which I guess makes sense.
I could do without the silly trends they try to get us to partake in, though.
“I’ll ask Gray to stop by The Stampede when he gets a chance.
Pretty sure he’d jump at the chance to have an excuse to talk to Liv,” Cain adds.
He’s not wrong if the way I’ve seen Gray watching her is any indication.
I don’t know if there’s a history there or if he just wishes there were, but either way, he would be the best option for hitting them up to host.
“And I can stop by one day while Tess is at work and see if Lori wouldn’t mind us hanging a flyer in the diner’s window,” I say.
“Great,” Kinsley chimes. “Looks like we’ve got a plan. I’ll talk to Aaron and see if he’s got any ideas for how to advertise on socials once we’ve got some of the finer details planned out.”
With that settled, we set off to clean up and make sure everything is ready for the crew coming in to take the next shift.
It’s just after eight o’clock in the evening by the time I’ve showered and made it to Tessa’s place.
Part of me feels bad for showing up this late, especially knowing that she’s likely just gotten Jake down for bed.
But there’s a bigger part of me—a more selfish part—that’s excited to have her all to myself.
I’ve got the next seventy-two hours off work, and damn if I don’t plan on spending most of those hours with her if she will let me.