27. Harper
TWENTY-SEVEN
HARPER
So this was heartbreak.
In the few hours I’d been alone in my old apartment, I’d gone through what felt like an entire range of emotions. It was textbook, except I was certain there were no books written about how to survive a breakup with your sasquatch boyfriend.
First there’d been tears. Would anyone ever make me feel the way Wyatt did? Had I ruined my only chance at love and happiness?
Anger came next, and I paced back and forth in the guest room, stewing over the long list of things I’d given up to be with Wyatt. My fists clenched, even now, as I thought about the Carders. They’d ruined everything. It was because of them that Valentina had come back into our lives. But was our breakup something that I could pin on the Carders? Or had they just exposed the darkness that had always been there, festering beneath the surface? Maybe Wyatt and I had been doomed from the very beginning.
At last came the numbness. I hated to admit it, but I also felt relief. I was free to go where I pleased, without an escort. I could spend my time around people who actually liked me. Best of all, I could begin to envision a future with a family of my own, something that wouldn’t have happened if I’d stayed with Wyatt.
Our breakup was inevitable. But it still sucked.
Wyatt had told me we’d broken up once before. I didn’t remember it, of course – another thing to pin on Valentina. But if I’d survived that breakup, I could survive this one.
I’d need to find a way to deal with the feelings that would inevitably surface when I saw Wyatt again. There was still the matter of the Carders, and my dad. I couldn’t forget Wyatt entirely, even if that’s what the breakup books suggested. This time, there was no magic potion to help me forget.
The front door banged open, and Savannah and Connor’s voices carried down the hallway and into the kitchen, followed by the gentle pop of what sounded like a bottle being uncorked. I smiled, the first in what felt like a long time.
The footsteps moved down the hallway. “Be careful,” Savannah said, followed by low whispering and the closing of the front door.
After a minute, I nudged the guest room door open a crack, only to find Savannah standing with her hand poised mid-air. “Oh, good. You’re alive.” She gestured to the glass of wine in her hand. “I brought you the best breakup medicine I could find. There’s nothing a good cabernet won’t cure.”
I opened the door all the way and took the glass from her hand. “I take it everyone knows, then?”
Looking past my disheveled appearance, she glanced at the unmade bed and the giant suitcase propped against the wooden frame. “It’s not exactly a secret. Apparently, you made a big scene when you pushed your way past the guards at the front door,” she laughed. “Bravo for that, by the way. But Wyatt didn’t say much, and I have questions. Come on,” she said. “Girl time on the couch. Now.”
“Where’s Connor?” I asked, following her to the sofa. As I peered around the living room, I realized nothing had changed. It looked exactly the same as when I’d moved out. “And where’s all his stuff?”
She rolled her eyes. “Connor wasn’t kidding when he said he was broke. I guess the wolves aren’t very good with their money, unlike your, uh…” She coughed into her sleeve. “Wyatt. And to answer your first question, Connor went out so that we could have some much-needed girl time.”
My eyes widened. “To the woods?”
“Heavens no,” she said. “Bannon made it clear that the wolves are to keep out of Stirling County. Connor is with Bannon at whatever cheap, sleazy motel he rented, probably chugging a Pbr.”
I glanced to the front door. It looked heavily reinforced – that was new. “What’s with all the deadbolts and chain locks?”
She rolled her eyes. “After the sasquatches brought in that… thing from the woods to interrogate, Connor spent the next day reinforcing our apartment. Just in case the Carders try something.” Her hand rested on my knee. “Which they won’t,” she promised.
Grimacing, I took a sip of wine. Large splatters of red covered my shirt as I spit it out. “Oh my god. That’s terrible.”
She frowned. “I hope it’s not corked. That was an expensive bottle.” She cautiously sniffed her glass, “It smells okay,” then took a slow, hesitant sip. “It’s fine,” she said. Her eyes clouded with concern. “Are you okay?”
I set my wine glass onto the coffee table and swiped at the wine splotches, though it was useless. My white shirt was now a deep crimson. It looked like I’d been stabbed in the heart, which in some ways, I had. “Sorry. I guess Wyatt has also found a way to ruin my favorite wine.”
“Oh, Harper.” She set her glass next to mine and pulled me into a large bear hug. “I guess now’s probably not the time to tell you that there’s some giant hunky-looking sasquatches posted guard outside the entrance to the building.”
I groaned. “I can’t believe the balls of that man. Even broken up, he still finds ways to annoy me.”
“He’s just trying to keep you safe,” she said as we pulled apart. “And until we figure out this thing with your dad and the Carders, I agree with Wyatt. Even if I don’t like that he hurt you.” She bit her lip, and squirmed in her seat.
My eyes narrowed. “What?”
“Well… I’m just trying to figure out what he did for you to finally walk away.”
I sighed. “It’s more like what he didn’t do. The man isn’t capable of being honest. I can’t trust anything that comes out of his mouth. I just don’t know what to believe anymore.” I stared down at my knees. “You know, it was bad enough having to sleep under the same roof as the woman who poisoned me and took away every happy memory I had of Wyatt from before. But to know that Wyatt slept with that vile creature…”
“Wyatt slept with Valentina?” This time, it was Savannah who spit out her wine, and she dabbed her lips with the side of her hand. “Whoops.”
“A long time ago,” I explained. “He said it didn’t mean anything. That it was just sex.”
“And?” Her brow raised. “Harper, you knew a man as good-looking as Wyatt wasn’t going to be the Virgin Mary.”
“I know. But… he lied to me. Twice. If he’d just come clean from the get-go, I wouldn’t be so upset about the whole,” I brushed my hand again, “Valentina thing. But…” my voice lowered to a whisper, “it’s not just that. It’s the life I’d have if I stayed with Wyatt. Or… wouldn’t have.”
Her eyes softened and moved to my stomach, which I was instinctively caressing. “Oh,” she whispered.
I nodded. “I want to have a baby. Not now,” I quickly added. “But I want to be with someone who I know I have a future with. Someone who can one day give me the family I’ve always wanted. And,” I smiled sadly, “that’s not Wyatt.”
“I understand,” she frowned. “And I’m sorry. That really sucks.”
“How is he?” I searched her eyes for any clues, but her expression didn’t give much away.
“That man is so hard to read,” she said, shaking her head. “I could tell he was trying hard to keep it together at the meeting, but I know when someone is heartbroken. And you both fit that bill.” Her eyes brightened, the sparkle returning. It was a look I knew well. “I have a great idea.” She ignored my groan. “Go put on your jammies, and we’ll have a breakup movie marathon: Under the Tuscan Sun. Eat, Pray Love . Bridget Jones’s Diary . We’ll work our way through the classics.”
“But Halloween is tomorrow. The gala.”
“You know me. Everything is all ready to go, both for work and for… infiltration.” She beamed. “I love that word. It makes me feel so bad ass.”
“If you’re sure. But can I borrow some jammies?” I smiled sheepishly. “And maybe a change of clothes for tomorrow since I stained these ones?”
Her brows knit together in confusion. “What did you pack in that giant suitcase of yours?”
My cheeks flushed as I turned my gaze to the hallway. I mumbled under my breath, knowing she couldn’t hear me.
“What was that?” she asked.
“My gala dress,” I mumbled, louder this time. “Though I guess it’s just a dress now, one I’ll probably never have a chance to wear.”
“Oh my god. I’m glad I wasn’t holding my wine,” she laughed, clutching her belly. “Are you actually telling me that my best friend – a woman who hates getting dressed up and going to events – packed a ball gown during her breakup, and nothing else?”
“No,” I replied with a straight face.
“Phew. I was actually worried for a minute.”
“I also packed the matching shoes.”
Twenty minutes later, with our high-heel clad feet resting on the coffee table, and two big bowls of popcorn perched on giant laps of taffeta, we screamed at Julia Roberts on screen in Eat, Pray, Love.
“You should go eat your way through Italy,” Savannah said, dreamily.
“I think I should probably figure out my living situation first.”
She shook her head. “You know you already have a place to stay, you silly goose.”
A flood of gratitude washed over me. “Savannah. I can’t—”
Her finger flew to my lips. “Nope. Not another word. The guestroom is yours, and it will always be yours, anytime you need it. Connor accepted that condition when he moved in. Now, was there a second part to your breakup list? Or can we jump ahead to the fun stuff, like planning revenge travel, and online dating portfolios?” She wiggled her brows and playfully threw a kernel at me.
On screen, Julia Roberts was seated at a red and white checkered table, twirling a forkful of spaghetti. “That does sound nice. At least the travel part. You already know how I feel about online dating,” I groaned. “But I think I need to take some time and figure my life out, before I jump into another relationship. I thought I liked journalism, but in some ways, the Carders did me a favor in firing me. I need to figure what I actually want to do for a career. And…” my voice lowered to a whisper, as the pangs from earlier returned, “I need time to heal.”
She nodded solemnly. “Of course. You know I’m here for you, however long it takes to get over Wyatt.”
“Thanks. None of it matters though, if we can’t stop whatever the Carders are up to, and find my dad.”
Her buttery fingers wrapped around mine and gave my hand a gentle squeeze. “We will. Wyatt’s plans are really good. He’s going to fix everything, Harper. You’ll see.”
My chin trembled slightly. “How can you be so sure?”
“Because that man loves you.”