33. AVERY
AVERY
“You need a haircut,” I tell Iris while combing through her hair in the bath. It’s the longest it’s ever been, and where she’s been surfing with Rhett over the last month, it’s got the same sea-bleached and coarse wisps at the ends like his hair does.
The smile that tugs at my lips is impossible to contain as I slather some more conditioner on her hair.
“I like my hair long like this. I look pretty like you, Mommy.”
“You are prettier than me, baby. You’re beautiful.”
“Doc says you’re beautiful all the time. Do you think he is too? Is that why you love him?”
Oh my God, this kid never ceases to amaze me with how forward and perceptive she is. I haven’t broached the moving in together subject yet, mostly because my mind is all over the place and it’s something I want to be able to talk her through if she doesn’t take it as well as I believe she will.
Besides that, Rhett and I had this massive blowup about the whole telling Mike thing, and since then things have been tense. But still…
“I love him…I love Rhett because he’s a good man. And when he smiles, my heart beats so fast that I can hardly catch my breath. I get all dizzy and giggly. Just like you,” I snicker while tickling her.
“Are you going to marry him one day and have more babies?” Iris turns to look at me with curious eyes glowing a deep mossy green as she awaits my reply.
With my heart stuttering in panic while I look for an answer, I keep smiling shakily. Trust her to put me on the spot like that.
“I-I don’t know,” I answer honestly.
“I don’t want you to break up.”
A lump forms at the back of my throat as I tell her, “We’re not.”
“You had a fight.”
“We had a disagreement. That means that we think different things on one thing, but it doesn’t mean we’re breaking up,” I manage to tell her while I rinse her off.
My heart is so heavy that I almost rush through the process of drying her off and getting her pajamas on so I can take a moment to get my head together before I put her to bed.
The more I think about it, the bigger the argument feels to me.
It goes from an argument to a fight, and I begin to wonder if when he walked out of the house it was something more.
The number of times Carl walked out after we had a fight… The lump in my throat swells some more as my heart leadens somewhere between my gut and my chest. The queasy feeling that refuses to go away returns with a vengeance, until I have no choice but to purge my stomach.
By the time I get to her bedroom, she’s already tucked into bed with Breeze cuddled into her.
To my surprise and relief, Rhett is already sitting in his chair with her favorite Dr. Seuss book in his hands.
My heart swoons when he leans forward and brings her hand to his lips, planting a kiss on the back of it before sitting back and reading her to sleep while I lie beside her and listen to the soft gravel of his voice.
It’s okay. Everything is going to be fine. It will all work out in good time. It’s all I keep telling myself as I stroke through Iris’s hair, and before I know it, I’m being carried to my own bed half-awake and half dreaming of what the future could hold for us.
“I’m gonna go lock up the house,” he tells me with a light stroke of his thumb over the side of my face. “Go back to sleep. I’ll be up after I return Rowan’s call.”
“Has something happened?”
“Nothing worth worrying about. We can talk about it tomorrow.” His reply is calm enough that it doesn’t rouse me any further from my sleepy lull while I peek at him walking away.
“I love you,” I call after him burrowing deeper into the blanket he covered me with and taking a long inhale of his pillow beside me.
“I love you too, sweetheart,” Rhett rumbles, and the sound warms all the way through me, from the inside out.
“I don’t want to fight.”
“We didn’t have a fight, it was an argument,” he tells me as he disappears out of the bedroom with a glance over his shoulder. “Now go to sleep, sunshine.”
The minute he’s out of sight, I can’t get settled.
I toss and turn for what feels like forever, until I decide it’s a hopeless cause and head downstairs.
Throwing Rhett’s hoodie on, I pause by the hallway window overlooking the driveway.
It’s dark, and it could be my eyes playing tricks on me given how on edge I am about the mess my father left on my doorstep and Carl.
However, the longer I stare out at the shadow in the distance, the more certain I am that it’s not a figment of my imagination.
That oppressing feeling I’ve been trying to push away tightens my chest. The chilling sense of being watched fills me with dread until all my insides are twisting painfully.
Turning the lamp beside the window off, I blink, allowing my eyes to adjust to the darkness, but when I look back out toward the top of the drive, there’s nothing.
I go to the window farther down that has a clear sight path down the driveway. I’m searching through the hollow blackness of night when I jump at the sound of the footsteps behind me.
“Whoa, what’s wrong?” Rhett asks as he turns me toward him, studying my face before looking past me, out of the window.
“I-I saw something.” Turning back to search the dark once more, I take a deep breath to try and settle my pounding heart while my stomach begins to churn. Bile burns up my chest to my swelling throat. “I think?”
“There’s nothing out there …” he whispers as though trying not upset me.
“I’m not crazy.” Shaking my head, I turn back to him. “I swear, Doc, someone was out there.”
“Okay.” Coaxing me toward the bedroom, he takes one last good look back out there. “Let’s get you back to bed. I’ll go take a look around.”
“Are you crazy?” I come to a stop just outside Iris’ room. There’s nothing amiss as I peer inside, and Breeze is calm as ever, as are the other dogs. If something were wrong, I’m certain they would be going mad. “You can’t go out there on your own. Besides, the dogs aren’t fussing, so…”
“If it will put you at ease, I can ask Rowan to come over and we can—”
“No! No, that’s not necessary. I think I’m spooked, is all, and my mind is playing tricks on me.”
“You sure?” he asks, pulling back the covers and waiting for me to get into bed.
“Yeah, you’ve locked up, right?”
“I did.”
“And you checked on Jo?” He always checks on Jo, but I need to be certain right now.
“Like always.”
“It’s okay, then.” I slip into bed and watch as he disappears into the bathroom to get changed.
For the first couple of minutes, I’m doing okay.
In my mind I know that the shadows on the ceiling are from the tall naked trees outside the window.
But then the what if it isn’t hits, and I find myself staring out of the window again, searching for something that clearly isn’t there, and I start to wonder if maybe I am losing my mind a little.
If the pressure is getting to me and messing with my head.
“Want me to take your mind off things?” Rhett asks from behind me, making me jump slightly.
When I turn to look at him, I find him in the bathroom doorway, strong arms crossed in front of his chest, bulging in that way that makes my eyes widen and my heart skip a beat or two.
Pushing off the doorjamb, he saunters toward me slow enough that I can’t help but ogle every dip and groove of his chest and abs.
Before I can say anything, Rhett hoists me up his body. My arms and legs wrap around him as he sits on the edge of the bed and murmurs into my ear, “Wanna make up?”
“Mmhmm,” I reply, pulling back to find his gaze.
We sit in silence for a beat or two, our breaths the only whisper in the night. Shadows be damned—when we’re this close, nothing else matters.
Tipping my head back, Rhett presses a kiss to my lips and with a savoring moan, peppers infinite kisses down to my jaw and my neck.
I’m barely able to catch a single breath when he pulls my pajama shirt off and loosens my hair from the knot on my head.
Hands all tangled in it, he lies back, taking me with him.
It doesn’t take long for our limbs to tangle together too as he makes love to me as though it might be the last time.
There’s no inch of me he leaves unkissed and untouched.
No part of me he doesn’t consume and worship.
Even when we’re done, he keeps me wrapped in his arms so tight that I can’t help but fall asleep.
Physically spent. Mentally exhausted. I don’t wake up until the morning light soaks through my eyelids.
Thursday comes by far quicker than I’m ready for.
Over the last two days, we’ve barely spoken on any of the things my father left.
Rowan and Callie are handling it, although Callie is pretty certain she’s onto something.
Instead, we’ve focused on making a plan for telling Jo about what we intend to do once things settle.
At this point, I’m not sure whether she’ll take it well or not.
Although, she seems to be a lot perkier the last few days.
Maybe having the ranch to herself last weekend did her some good.
I think that’s what she needs—peace and quiet—instead of constant chaos.
“So Callie’s going to meet me at the beach before the kids get there,” I tell Rhett over breakfast. I don’t feel so bad today. Maybe a little bloated, but my stomach finally feels somewhat back to normal after the last few weeks.
“She’s still antsy about Scarlett going in the water?”
“Yeah, I’m pretty certain I’m the only reason she signed the permission slip.” I take a sip of my coffee and smile at the fact that it tastes amazing again.
“You realize she tried to get Rowan to take the day off work so he could play lifeguard, right?”
“No, I did not…and no, she didn’t.”
“I know, it’s absurd. It’s not like Scarlett will drown in a rock pool.”
“Technically you can drown in anything over two inches of water.”
“Why would Scout drown?” Iris asks, peering up from the YouTube show she’s watching on Rhett’s iPad. “She can swim.”