11
Harper
T esoro… Man, this woman! How the fuck can I be this into her after only two days?
My mind goes a mile a minute and I just can’t seem to catch up with what is going on in my life.
Tomorrow is her father’s funeral and we need to be there.
Somehow, I still have a job. At least I think I do.
I haven’t been to work the past few days so I actually don’t know.
I was never this into women. Yeah, I thought women could be really pretty but kissing and fucking are a whole different story.
Somehow, she unlocked a part in me that I never wanted to admit to anyone.
It scares me. This feeling of truly being seen for who I am, for my feminine beauty.
What the hell is she doing with someone like me?
I don’t belong in her world. She’s some kind of gorgeous power woman and I’m just a nurse.
How does she make me feel so special and safe then?
Out of my periphery I see her open the car door for me. I’m completely in my own bubble that I’m startled when she grabs me and pushes me to the car before I can get in. She pushes herse lf against my back. I feel every inch of her. Her heat radiating through my dress.
“Get out of that head of yours. Whatever you’re feeling it’s okay and it doesn’t need explaining right now.”
“How do you know what I’m thinking?”
“Because it is written all over your face.” Her hands travel up my thighs and lift my skirt all the way up until my skirt is resting on my bare ass. Even though the LA air is warm and soft, I get chills. Alessia keeps caressing my ass and thighs, soft kisses in my neck.
“It is okay to feel overwhelmed by my world…” She whispers in my ears between kisses.
“I know you’re new to this but I will take this one step at a time.
If you need me to stop, you just need to say so.
” Her hand lands on my ass, giving me that sting of pleasure and I rub my thighs together in response.
Alessia steps away from me and walks over to the driver’s side. Just like that she’s gone again, leaving me wanting more each time. Fucking hell! I take a few deep breaths and step into the car.
Alessia drives us to a little Italian restaurant on the boardwalk, it has those red and white checkered curtains and tablecloths on dark oak tables. An old woman walks over to us.
“Mia cara Alessia, dov’eri in tutto questo tempo?” The woman asks in quick Italian while hugging Alessia tightly.
“Sorry, Maria. Life got in the way lately.” A smile stretching from ear to ear on Alessia’s face. “This is my girlfriend Harper.” She looks over to me with a twinkle in her eyes. Ma ria walks over and pulls me into a hug. I can’t help but return it, a warm fuzzy feeling washing over me.
Although the place is packed with people there’s still a little corner booth available for us.
Maria leads us through all the tables, filled with people laughing and eating.
She’s rambling on to Alessia about how the restaurant has been doing lately.
We take a seat and one of the waiters brings out a bottle of wine and pours us both a glass.
“Your usual, Principessa?” Maria asks.
“You know what, it’s a special day so surprise us please.” Alessia’s eyes have a mischievous twinkle. One I’ve come to know and love.
“A surprise it is then.” Maria winks and walks to the kitchen.
I let out a breath, sink back in the booth and look around the restaurant, enjoying the families and couples around me.
They seem so at ease and carefree, my life feels nothing like that anymore and I have a feeling that it will only be the beginning.
I feel Alessia’s hand covering mine and I startle by the touch.
“What is going on in that pretty little head of yours?” she asks.
“I don’t know, I was just looking at the people and admiring the atmosphere in this place.”
“And…?”
“And… How it feels that my life has changed so drastically in the last days.” I respond.
Alessia ’s brows furrow, “I get it. It’s a lot to take in. It’s been my entire life so I don’t know any better. I get how all of this can be intimidating for an outsider.”
“Yeah, it really is. It kind of feels like I’m stuck and have no other place except the one by your side or in your bed.” My voice has a little annoyance in it.
“B—…” Alessia tries to say something but I don’t let her. She has done enough talking for today, now it’s my turn.
“No! You don’t get to say something cute or clever now. It’s my turn.” My blood starts to boil in my veins.
“I became a nurse because I wanted to make a difference. I want to do my own thing and now I can’t even do that without checking it by you or Alex first. What kind of life is that, huh?
I’m not made to be someone’s pretty little housewife and wait around for her partner to get home.
I have a life and friends beside you! I don’t know if this can work if that’s my new role in whatever situationship we have. ”
“You are your own person…” Alessia looks defeated.
“Am I? Really? Because moving me into your house and dictating if I can go to work or out with friends doesn’t really feel like being my own person.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t think about it that way. It’s just that my life is dangerous and everyone who has a relationship with me is in the line of fire. I was trying to protect you.”
“Who do I need protection from? And have you ever thought that I could be perfectly capable to take care of myself? I have lived in this city for a few years now, you know. It’s not like it’s an extremely safe city to be in.” Sarcasm dripping off my tone.
Two waiters walk towards our table and put down a lot of tiny plates and dishes with the best food I ever smelled. Alessia nods at them silently and they walk back to the kitchen.
“What can I do?” Alessia asks, her eyes search my face.
“I don’t know… Maybe you could start by talking to me instead of telling me what to do and where to be. If you want me to stay, you need to make me your equal.”
Alessia fidgets with her fingers, she looks nervous. What the hell? How can she be nervous, she’s a fucking mafia princess, or queen, or whatever. They don’t get nervous right? Do they? I wish I could see inside her brain, she’s so tough to read.
“You said that I’m in the line of fire now. Don’t you think I should know why? Who do I need to look out for? Don’t I deserve that at least?”
Alessia doesn’t say a word. Lost in thought, I think.
I pick at the food, suddenly I have lost all my appetite but I still try some of the dishes because my stomach is growling.
Alessia starts eating as well, so we eat in silence.
I bet this is nothing like the dinner she had in mind.
I can’t help it but I need to set some boundaries.
She might be the dominant one between the two of us but that doesn’t mean she can just walk all over me and dictate my life.
People have crossed my boundaries way to many times in my life and I’m done.
I’m done with pleasing everybody and saying yes to them.
I’m done s etting myself on fire just to keep others warm — my light doesn’t need anyone’s permission to shine.
After dinner we drive back to her place in silence, tension hanging in the air.
Once we’re parked, I step out and walk towards the elevator.
I don’t even bother to wait for Alessia.
I need a bath and sleep and tomorrow things will look different.
I walk past Alessia’s room to the one she picked for me.
When I open the door, I see that everything except my furniture was brought here from my apartment.
I open one of the boxes that says clothing and flip it upside down on the floor.
I find a pair of leggings and a big, oversized jersey to sleep in, I lay them on the bathroom counter and run the bath.
Steam fills the bathroom, I pull open the cabinets and find lavender oil and pour it into the water.
Maybe that will calm me a little, or enough for me to fall asleep.
Once the bath is filled up, I step in and immerse myself in a cloud of warmth and bubbles.
All of a sudden it feels like every muscle in my body aches.
Alessia
I sit and stare out at the grey wall of the parking garage.
What the fuck happened tonight? How is it possible that one moment we’re eye-fucking each other in the car and the next she’s pissed off and walking away?
I get where she’s coming from but she needs to understand that there are things I need to control.
I can’t just let her do everything she wants without a ca re in the world.
It would be irresponsible and stupid. Gianni is still out there.
Now that the other Dons have met her it’s only a matter of days before Gianni finds out.
He will come after us. I hate that I don’t know where the asshole is hiding.
Somehow, he’s always been five steps ahead of me in the last sixteen years.
A knock on the car window startles me from my thoughts.
“Are you okay, boss?” Elio asks from the other side of the window. I hadn’t even seen him walk over to me. I step out of the car and rest my hand on his shoulder. “Yeah, I’m fine, just a lot of stuff to process.”
“Anything I can help you with?”
I let out a little laugh. “I don’t think so, unless you want to be a shrink for my girlfriend and me?”
“Yeah, I think I’ll pass on that one. I have enough trouble understanding women as it is, let alone the two of you.” Elio winks.
“I’m going upstairs. Will you please make sure my brother and sister are ready at ten tomorrow morning?”
“Will do, Ma’am.”
“Thank you, Elio, I don’t know what I would do without you.”
I walk over to the elevator and push the button for the third floor.
Once I’m upstairs, I don’t hear Harper anywhere.
I walk through the hall and step into my room.
The room is dark and there’s no sign of her anywhere.
I leave my door open and walk over to her room.
I can see the light underneath her door.
I knock on her door but she doesn’t answer.
I sigh and walk back to the kitchen. I need wine and a lot of it.
I pick one of the bottles from the rack and grab a glass from the shelf and take them to my room.
I set down the glass and bottle next to my bed and strip down.
I can’t even bother to shower now. I’m done for today.
I pull back the covers and climb into bed, pour myself a glass and sit back in the cushions.
I take out my phone, I need to just not think for a while.
I open TikTok and start scrolling while sipping my wine.
Today was exhausting and tomorrow will be worse with my father’s funeral.
I’m so ready for all of this to be over.
After another glass of wine, I feel my eyes getting heavy.
I set down my glass and phone and try to get some sleep.
It only takes a few breaths for me to fall into a restless sleep.