Chapter 5
Doc and I managed to get three hours sleep, before Charlie Chief woke us up with an update, Alpha team were delayed for medical reasons with the captors and have just departed Rutland and to expect them inside an hour and that Delta team had arrived with Janelle.
I slept much longer than intended, but it was also much needed, and I slept like the dead, that tends to happen when you’ve been awake as long as we had been. Doc and I just checked on Lily and my angel is doing really well. Her vitals are strong and so are those of our babies which is the best sign a man could ask for, and all being well she will pull through this, I know she will, my girl is a fighter.
We’re stepping onto the psychiatric ward where Janelle has been set up in one of their private suites. Doc wants her comfortable and I had to agree because Janelle is more than likely a victim herself and will remain here for a long period of time while Doc assesses her and works out a treatment plan.
We step into her room and see her sitting by the window, intently searching, like she’s searching and waiting for someone.
“Ms. Saunders, do you remember who I am?” I say.
I take the seat opposite her and Janelle turns away from the window and looks at me and then to Doc standing beside her.
“Yes, I remember. Did you find my Caroline?” She asks hopeful.
“We did, Ma’am. She’s on her way here now and should arrive shortly. You were right, Caroline had been visiting you and she is hurt, so we’re going to get her looked at and treated, but it’s going to take some time, Doc here is the best and will look after you both.” I say.
“Ohh, thank you young man, can I see Caroline when she arrives?”
Doc squats down next to Janelle and takes her hand in his and she shifts her gaze to him.
“Do you remember when Caroline visited that she was bruised and looked hurt?”
“Yes, Caroline looked unwell and had all these bruises from the car accident, will she be, okay?”
“Yes, we’re going to get Caroline better, she’s quite sick at the moment, when she is able to have visitors, I’ll let you know, but I will do everything I can to help her, you just have to trust that I will be doing everything to make her well and I need to help you also.”
The look of relief that comes across Janelle’s face is evident, I’m furious and sad she is only thinking of Caroline, but like Doc said, her mind is back in 2016.
Each time I see Janelle, the more I see she is a loving person, which fucking angers me more because Lily and her own life have been hell for the past eight years. I can’t wait to interrogate Trickle; we need some fucking answers.
“How do you like your new room Ms. Saunders?” I ask.
“Ohhh, it’s beautiful, so much nicer than the last place. I just hope I can go outside and walk in the garden and feel the sun on my face, one day soon. I have a feeling that I’m not myself, I can’t explain it. But I want to get better.”
“Can I give you a hug Janelle?” Doc asks.
“You may, I haven’t felt touch for a long time.”
Doc leans in and gives her a hug, “I’m going to work out what’s wrong and we’ll make a plan to do exactly that, get you living your life again, walking in the garden outside sounds like a good first goal, if you promise to work with me, I’ll promise to make that happen. Deal?”
“Deal, I like you young man, what is your name?”
“I’m, Doc, and I’ll be your treating doctor from now on, and this big guy here, is Alexander.”
“It’s nice to meet you both and thank you so much for helping my Caroline and me.”
I soften when I speak this time, “You’re safe here, and you will be looked after, is there anything else you want or need?”
“Is it possible to have some wool and crochet hooks? The last place wouldn’t allow that, but I miss making outfits for babies and stuffed bears and animals for the sick kids. It kept my hands busy; I’ve missed that.”
I look to Doc and he nods his head.
“I think we can arrange that; do you need any books for like patterns and stuff?”
Janelle smiles wide, and when she does, I see my Lily shine through, it’s not easy knowing what went on in their past but I need to keep an open mind and treat Janelle with respect.
“No, thank you, the patterns are all up here,” Janelle taps her head, indicating her memory.
“I’ll have some supplies delivered to you by the end of the day, what I need for you to do is settle in, and be honest with Doc. We need to get going now but we’ll be by tomorrow.”
“Thank you, Alexander and you too Doc, for everything.”
I nod and stand, and Doc follows suit, “You’re welcome.”
“I’ll be by in the morning Ms. Saunders and we’ll run some tests and work out the best treatment plan for you.”
“Will I be out of it again, and not be able to speak, because I don’t want that, I don’t want to be angry anymore.”
Doc touches Janelle’s shoulder before telling her that she won’t be in that state again. We both walk out and stop outside her door.
“She’s in there isn’t she, Doc.”
“Yeah man, she is. I can almost guarantee that Janelle is not a violent person by nature, and we’ll have no trouble from her. It’s just going to take time to work out a balance of finding the right medication as we bring her off all the shit she’s been given over the years, hopefully we can get rid of all meds all together.”
“You really think she’s been drugged, don’t you?”
“Yes, I’m almost one hundred percent positive. I will run the necessary tests and work closely with the psychologist but I do think Janelle is in there, she seems better than yesterday and I see her with no inkling of violence. Again, it’s a time and therapy thing.”
“Good, okay, I want to check in on Alexa and Davies before the team arrives.” I say as we start heading in their direction.
“Me too, I want to do my own checks on the both of them for peace of mind.”
We stepinto Alexa and Davies suite and I see Charlotte in the corner, “Charlotte, why don’t you go grab something to eat and take a break, I know it’s not easy sitting for hours on end but I do thank you.”
“I wouldn’t be anywhere else, Harrington. How’s our Lily doing?”
“She made it through surgery and is stable, they have her set up in the room next to this one. Go grab a coffee and some food and then stop in to see her, you need to be prepared for what you will see, take the break first.”
“Yes, I need some fuel, I’ve been beside Lily before, and hoped I’d never have to see her like this again but let’s hope this is the last fucking time.”
A tear escapes Charlottes eye and I nod and leave her to compose herself, I know Charlotte wouldn’t welcome any comfort, she’s a prideful woman and deserves the respect.
Doc is checking over Alexa’s injuries while she’s sleeping and when he starts palpitating her chest she winces and starts to stir.
“Owee, stop it huwts, Ow.” Alexa grumbles sleepily.
“Hey, Princess, Uncle Doc is here. You sure have a wicked battle mark here.”
“Hi, Uncwle Doc, yesh I’s have a piwate X mawks the spot, I’s being brave but it’s saw.”
“Yes, baby girl, it’s going to be sore for a little while, but I’m going to give you some more medicine, okay, Princess.”
“Yesh pwease, I’s not wike da pains.”
“I got you sweet girl, Uncle Doc will help it feel less painful.”
“Thank you, Doc, did you save my mommy?” Alexa asks with her lower lip wobbling.
“I did, Mommy is doing well, she just needs time to heal just like you and Pa do.”
Alexa reaches up and holds Doc’s face in her little hands, “Yoaw da best Uncwle Doc, I wuvs you.”
“And I love you baby girl, now let’s get you some more medicine so you can rest.”
Alexa lets Doc go and turns to me, “I’s so happy Daddy, Mommy is going to be okay, can I see Mommy before I’s have da medichin? It makes me sweepy.”
I look at Doc who is drawing up her morphine and he nods.
This time it’s me who takes Alexa’s face in my big hands, “Yes, let’s go see Mommy, but you need to understand that Mommy is badly hurt and looks very different, there is a lot of machines surrounding her, okay.”
“Okay, Daddy.” Alexa nods enthusiastically.
“Mommy will get better and slowly come off the machines, but for now it will look a little scary.”
“Okay, wet’s go. I needs to see my mommy and tewws her I’s wuv her.”
Alexa grabs the picture she drew of her and Lily riding the carousel in Central Park, and I gently lift her up and we go next door to see Lily. Alexa’s gasp as we enter the suite has my heart constricting, tears start trickling down her emotion filled face and all I want to do is take her pain away. We walk up to Lily’s side and Alexa wriggles to get down.
“Can I sit beside Mommy?”
Doc is the one to speak this time, “Yes, you can, Princess, but you have to be very gentle and you can’t touch Mommy’s chest or tummy area, okay.”
“Okay, I’s just gives hew a kiss.”
I lower Alexa to sit next to Lily on the bed and she gently moves in to give her kisses and stroke her hair.
‘I wuvs you so, so much, Mommy, Doc will fix you up. I’s heaw with you, and I’s drawed you a pictuaw of us on da hawsey’s to makes you feel bettaw. I wiww visit wif you as much as I can. I wuvs you muchwy.’
My sweet girl, is being so brave and we can all feel the love emanating from deep within her soul. My girl wears her heart on her sleeve and I never want that to change, it’s a beautiful quality to have.
‘I’s got huwt and so did Pa, but we be okay, we awe heawing and we wiww aww be bettaw soon. I wuvs you so, so much, to da moon and back.’
Alexa leans back and turns to me and I pick her up and carry her out of Lily’s room and back to her bed, Doc insert the morphine into her bung and gives Alexa the pain relief she needs, and as I’m tucking her into bed again, she whispers, “Mommy wiww be okay Daddy, Uncwle Doc wiww makes hew aww bettaw.”
“I know, Princess, it’s just going to take some time before we can wake Mommy up, each day she will be stronger and soon we can all be together again.”
As Alexa is drifting off to sleep, she whispers, “I knows, Daddy, I wuvs you to da moon and back.”
I brush her curls out of her face and whisper, “And, I love you to the moon and back, Princess.”
Doc is assessing Davies, when I turn around and I can see the pain written across his face, just like me earlier, it is not easy seeing your strong mentor in this state, it’s a harsh reminder that we are not invincible and we need to enjoy this life because it’s not always guaranteed.
I will be making changes, I can’t keep going on Tier 1 missions, it’s not fair on Alexa or Lily, especially with a long recovery ahead and growing my babies at the same time. I’m needed here with my family, and JSOC will just have to understand or use another team. Our team can still run missions with me coordinating State side, but I will be making these changes, it just might take a little time to implement fully.
Just as I step up to Davies, Charlie Chief walks up to us with a stiff gait and I know the bird has landed.
“Alpha team has arrived; we’ve set up an abandoned room in the basement for Trickle.” His face is like stone when he mentions his name, and the anger rolling off him is dangerous, everyone wants a piece of him it seems. “and we have a room for Caroline set up in the Psych ward.”
Doc and I both growl our thanks and follow Charlie Chief, and every single person we pass moves out of our way, our menacing body language radiating from us, one is bad enough but three of us is an intimidating site.