Chapter 14
It’s been a crazy couple of weeks, I’ve been spending time reconnecting with my mom. I’ve been filling her in on my life and she’s been telling me about her treatment while she sits and crochets the babies beautiful outfits and stuffed animals.
It’s going much better than I ever imagined possible, I’ve talked to her about how it was after the accident from my perspective and it upsets her greatly, but she listens and doesn’t dismiss my feelings. We’ve been slowly building our trust back, and Mom has helped me design a wedding dress that would be flattering with my swollen belly. Alexa’s dress is an exact replica of mine with a scarlet sash around her waist and I can’t wait to watch her lead me down the aisle.
Alexa and I picked out scarlet, satin slippers, as Alexa likes to call them, and the dresses will be ready next Friday.
I’ll be marrying the man beyond my dreams in ten weeks and signing Alexa’s adoption papers as soon as I’m officially Mrs. Harrington, September 14th can’t come fast enough .
Alexander and the guys will be wearing their ‘Dress Uniform’, that was my only real request because I love these men and everything they represent. Technically not in active duty, no, not as far as the public is aware but they are Elite Tier 1 operators consulting directly for JSOC and it’s an extraordinary job they do. And I want to see these strong, amazing men in all their honor.
Alexander has arranged everything, he wants to give me the wedding of my dreams, and all I want is to marry the man that has given me everything… a life.
I want to try and break through to Caroline, I’d love my sister back in my life and for her to be whole, or as whole as she can be, one day soon.
I would love for her to be at my wedding, but I don’t know if that will happen it’s probably going to take time for Caroline to open up and let go of all she’s been through, but Doc feels that I may just be the key. So, today I feel ready to see Caroline. I’m fearful of her reaction because I know she harbors ill feelings and anger towards me, and I don’t blame her in the slightest. Being held against her will for eight years is incomprehensible. Being taken from your family, friends and your life is devastating, especially at such a young age and the things that were done to her and I hate that she has been through this. It was bad enough thinking she was dead, but to be alive all this time is an absolute nightmare.
The psychologist and Doc feel that for her to really progress and want the help, she needs to see me, her other half; even if it’s anger that is released, she needs to feel... feel something, let out what she’s been holding onto.
I will be going in without Alexander, he’s staying outside the door and he isn’t too happy about it but the least people in the room, the less threatened Caroline will feel hopefully.
Doc has just finished reassuring Alexander and me that he will be standing right beside Caroline with sedation in case she needs calming down. Tiny is in there as he’s been a permanent fixture in her room since our rescue, and that is the only reason my caveman has begrudgingly agreed.
“Angel, are you sure about this?”
I hear the concern in Alexander’s voice and if I’m being honest, I’m concerned too, but I need to do this for both our sakes. I rise up on my tip toes and kiss my strong, handsome man.
“I need to do this, if I can help Caroline even just a little, I’ve got to try.”
Alexander kisses my forehead and reluctantly lets me go, “Okay Angel, keep your distance and if you need to leave, you leave.”
I nod then turn to Follow Doc into Caroline’s suite before I change my mind. Stepping inside I see Tiny in the corner and we nod at each other, taking a deep breath I look toward the bed and see my sister with her knees to her chest, curled into herself her white, blonde hair draped over her arms like a shield.
“Caro,” I whisper stepping further into the room, “it’s me, Elizabeth.”
“I know who you are, I feel you, and your babies.”
I gasp, Caroline hasn’t even looked at me yet and she knows.
“How?” I whisper.
Caroline slowly raises her head and tilts it on an odd angle and what I see shocks me, she looks like me but also different now, her hair is shorter than mine sitting just below her shoulders, and her face is weathered and noticeably scarred.
“Because, sister, I know the feeling of life growing inside of me and I can feel your babies inside of me. We are twins after all.”
Caroline starts laughing maniacally and I look to Doc, who looks a little surprised but signals me to keep engaging. I take a deep breath and look back to my sister.
“Where is your baby Caroline?” I whisper.
I’m internally freaking out, but I have to do this because Caroline is finally talking but we also need to know, we need answers.
“My baby boy died.” Caroline says without emotion.
I try to hold back my tears but I can’t help it, “Do you want to tell me what happened?”
Caroline’s face twists with pain and darkens, “Here’s the abridged version Elizabeth,” Caroline starts her voice emanating such hatred.
“Daddy picked me up from cheer practice and it was raining heavily, your red coat was in the car so he grabbed that and met me at the track and I slid it on, thankful to have something dry and warm. The rain was heavy, Daddy was driving slow and all of a sudden, we were rammed from behind hard and jolted forward, the car hurtled forward and we smashed into a tree, hard. The next thing I know I’m being dragged out of the car by my hair, I kicked and fought against it until I felt a sharp pain in the side of my neck.”
Caroline is staring at me hard and I’m just trying my hardest to hold it together, “I’m so sorry that happened to you, Caroline.”
Tears spill over begin streaming down my face as Caroline continues.
“You’re sorry? Why because it was meant to be you?”
“I-I know.” I whisper.
Caroline snorts, “I came to with a heavy body on top of me but I couldn’t fight them off, I screamed and screamed but no one came to help me. No one ever did. At the start they always wore a mask, they didn’t believe it was me in the beginning but they soon realized I wasn’t you, I’m not demure and sweet like you.”
My heart is beating so hard in my chest, and I really don’t feel good, this is devastating listening to Caroline’s pain.
“The torture continued and a few years later it was mainly Rob who was there, I heard them talking one day saying that Mom was losing her shit and that Jay’s plan to woo you was working, they were the ones drugging her in hopes that what eventually happened, did. It was their plan to turn her psychotic as soon as they realized they didn’t have you.”
“Caroli–”
“I was beaten and raped every day until I showed symptoms that I was pregnant, it took years mind you but they raped me over and over multiple times a day until they finally succeeded, I was on birth control before I was taken you see.”
“I’m sorry, Caroline.” I whisper.
“Stop! Stop saying you are fucking sorry, just be thankful it wasn’t you,” she screams at me.
I take a step back and she laughs, “I’m not going to hurt you Elizabeth, but you wanted to know what happened, all of you fucking do, right? So, I’m telling you. They continued raping me but the beatings stopped. When I went into labor I was in immense pain and there was a lot of blood and I knew something was wrong, there was too much blood.
When the baby came out there was no cry, I was frantic and screaming at them to save my baby but all they did was drug me and when I woke, I was in serious pain and lying on the dirty mattress with my dead baby boy lying beside me.”
I’m shocked, and start to feel faint, Doc notices and rushes over to me and grabs me by my arms to hold me up.
“Lily, that’s enough for today.” Doc sternly advises.
I shake my head, “No, no, I’m okay, I just need to sit, Caroline needs to tell her story, and I want to be here to listen.”
“At least sit your ass down, Elizabeth. I can feel your heart, it’s beating too fast and as much as I hate this, I don’t hate you, now please sit the fuck down.”
“Enough,” Tiny growls surprising us all.
“Whatever you say, big guy,” Caroline chortles.
Doc helps me into a chair and passes me some water and I take a few cleansing sips before Caroline continues.
“The bastards left my baby there with me until there were only bones left, a daily reminder of my failings. Then a couple of years later you ran and that’s when I became useful to them, you see they couldn’t get me pregnant after the first time, so they did with whatever they wanted to me. I was used as a porn to lure you out, I didn’t want to do it, not really, but I needed the drugs more.
Doc turns to Caroline and speaks, “We have garnered information, and we know it was their plan to take the both of you, opportunity arose that night and Jay took it, but it was always the plan for the both of you to be taken.”
Mine and Caroline’s eyes go wide with surprise, “But they only ever said they wanted Elizabeth.”
I notice her whole demeanor change, and I feel it. I start to feel my sisters feelings which I haven’t felt anything since I was told she was dead, I always felt cold but I thought that was due to the harsh winter and part of the grieving process, but what if I was wrong, this breaks my heart because I should have known.
Doc continues, “It was a plan their grandfather and fathers put into their heads from a young age, you were both marked for a plan to produce a pure, white bloodline. It was a sick and twisted plan that the cousins decided to follow through on, they were groomed themselves from a young age. I’m not excusing their behavior but you need to know the truth. Caroline, even if Elizabeth was taken that night, they still would have come for you. I’m glad you’ve started talking and if you want, I will work with you to help you recover, both physically and mentally.”
Caroline sighs heavily, “I’m shattered, Doc, I’m too far gone and there’s too many pieces to put back together.”
Doc steps over to Caroline and she looks up with watery eyes, she looks so broken but I see she has a little hope in her eyes and that’s all it takes for a spark to ignite the flame.
“I’d like to try, Caroline, I have treatments available for your physical scars but until now you haven’t allowed us to really treat you and I get it, but it’s time. The Psychology team and I would like to help you heal if you’ll work with us.”
“Please, Caro, I’d like my sister to be with me again.” I whisper brokenly.
Caroline shifts her eyes to me and she starts crying, and all I want is to hold her but I also know she’s not ready.
I feel hope bloom in my chest and know that it’s Caroline’s hope, I feel my own matching hers and she looks at me with a nod of recognition.
“Okay, Doc, do your worst. It can’t be any worse than what I’ve already endured.”
I breathe out a long breath and nod my head encouragingly.
“Thank you for telling me, I understand if you don’t want me visiting you but I’d like to come back and visit you tomorrow?” I ask hopeful that Caroline wants me in her life.
“I can’t say I’m going to be nice all the time; I’m still riding the detox waves and it’s hard, really fucking hard but yes, if you can bear with me, I’d like that. It seems I need to come to terms with this new information that it could have been the both of us. I know you’re sorry and I am too, I really am.”
I smile warmly at her, “Thank you, Caro, I’ll see you tomorrow, trust in Doc he is a fantastic doctor and I trust him with my life, he saved me and my babies, I should be dead now but thanks to Doc, I’m here with you.”
“Elizabeth, you need to go eat something, your hunger is making me nauseous, thank you for listening and I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I feel her honesty and know she’s going to allow Doc to help her. Her being willing is all anyone can ask for. I know it won’t be easy but I won’t give up on her, she’s my sister, my twin and the other half of my soul.