Chapter 20
CHAPTER TWENTY
Aknock lands against my door three times in rapid succession. I pause my pacing. If it’s Jasper again, I know he won’t enter without an invitation… if it’s Nyx, he’ll come in anyway. If it’s Cici—the handle turns.
“Okay, wow.” Cici steps inside carrying two large leopard print bags and a duffel nearly as big as she is. “You look like a haunted Victorian child, you know, more than usual.”
I plop onto the couch, elbows on my knees, the sleeves of Nyx’s hoodie hanging off my hands. I haven’t taken it off. And I don’t know why.
She shuts the door with her heel and looks around the room. “Why are we in the dark?” She whispers.
“I just needed to be, I don’t know, I just?—”
She flicks them on, her brows furrowing.
I wince, squinting at her. “I’m fine.”
“Mm-hmm.” She drops the bags with a loud thud.
“You say that, but your face is the emotional equivalent of a thunderstorm.” I stare at the floor.
She steps around me, sinking into the space beside me and folds her legs beneath her, watching me like I’m a puzzle she’s about to solve.
“Speak.” I feel her eyes on me, the silence devouring me whole.
“I messed up,” I admit.
I exhale shakily. The words come out rough, scraping my throat on the way.
She doesn’t interrupt, only pats me on the back cautiously as if I might flee.
But she leans her shoulder into mine, nonetheless.
So, I keep going. I tell her about Jasper.
About the Narcan that she already knew I held onto, the item I hid a lifetime ago that somehow still found me.
Scott in the office. About the elevator and Greer.
Nyx. All of it. The words spilling from me the way Miss Onida pours the extra fruit juice down the sink.
The whole time she listens, only nodding. When I finally stop, my hands are shaking inside Nyx’s sleeves. I stuff them quickly beneath my thighs.
She exhales slowly. “Okay.”
“That’s all you’ve got?” I snort.
“That’s a lot, Florence.”
I drop my forehead onto my knees, groaning. “I wasn’t myself.”
She tilts her head. “Sounds like you were yourself. The last bit you were just… cornered.”
I straighten, shaking my head. “Every moral I have was screaming at me and I still?—”
“Hey.” She elbows me. “You’re human, not a marble statue in a courthouse.”
I huff a humorless breath. Her eyes scan the hoodie gathered in my lap, a grin slowly spreading across her face. “You’re still wearing his hoodie.”
I clutch it tighter automatically, rolling my eyes. At her and myself. “Don’t start.”
Cici gasps dramatically. “Oh my gosh. She’s imprinting.”
My eyes widen as if I’m being accused of treason. “I am not imprinting,” I say, my voice low.
“You absolutely are imprinting. You look one full moon away from howling.”
I chuckle, shoving her knee. “You’ve been spending too much time with Bear.”
Her grin only widens. “It smells like him, doesn’t it?”
I hesitate, my limbs tensing. That’s answer enough.
She squeals and falls back into the couch, kicking her feet. “I knew it!”
My hand is there, covering her mouth, I look around the room as if someone is going to jump out and point their fingers at me.
Cici’s voice only rises behind my hand, her excited mumbles hot against my palm.
I let her go, wiping my palm on the arm of the couch. “Would you shut up! Someone could hear you. It’s not a big deal, it’s black and… it’s warm.” I wrap my arms around my waist.
“Uh huh,” she hums. “I’ve been waiting for this moment my entire life!” she squeals again.
“So now what? What do I do?” I whisper.
Cici jumps up, grabbing one of her heavy bags.
“Well.” She walks into my room, throwing it onto the bed.
“You’re going to start with a much-needed shower.
” She reappears, reaching for my wrist, and pulls me to my feet.
Her nose crinkles as she flips my hands over.
“If your hands are going to look like you fought a chainsaw, then we are at least fixing your nails too.”
Cici pulls me toward the bedroom, dumping out the contents one of her bags. Snacks, drinks, polish, face masks, hair masks, and so much more tumble out onto the bed. She plucks a neon orange from the pile.
“You know I only like black,” I tell her.
“You like emotional oppression,” she counters. I blink at her, folding my arms dramatically. “Ceclia Bennett, I am a grown woman and if I like black then?—”
“Fine!” She groans. “But you will participate in the rest.”
I scan the bed cautiously at the bright packs staring back at me. “What is this, a high school slumber party?”
Cici grins ferally. “That’s exactly what this is. It’s long overdue, friend.” She spins on her heels back out of the bedroom door. “Now go shower, we have a long night ahead of us!”
Steam rises between us as Cici unwraps the curling iron from a strand of my hair, lightly tapping as she goes.
“You’ve already washed my hair; you don’t have to do this.” I tell her. I grab the black liner from the bathroom counter, pulling my undereye down slightly to line it as she reaches for another strand.
“I would do it even if your hands weren’t shredded. Your hair is unfairly pretty. Besides, you look good, you feel good.” She shrugs, humming under her breath. “What are you going to do today since you can’t lift?”
I pump the mascara brush in the container a few times before stroking the bristles lightly in my lashes. “Treadmill, StairMaster, there’s other things than lifting.”
Cici grabs the hair spray, clouding the air above my head. “You’re done!” She brushes her fingers through it gently, then pulls the hair over my shoulders. Each long curl lays as soft as air, the strands loose and layered in thick inky waves.
“Thank… you.” I stand and tilt my head slightly, stunned by the way it’s not tactical but feminine.
“You sure you don’t want to rest today?” Her eyes flick to mine in the mirror.
“I’m good, I promise.”
I exit the bathroom and pull a faded indigo top from the hanger in my closet, carefully slipping it over my head.
Cici emerges a heartbeat later, puckering as she applies her lip gloss.
Her bright pink gym set illuminates her bright green eyes, the shadow around them giving them the perfect “doe” look.
“Right off the runway, ladies and gentlemen,” I announce through cupped hands.
I swear her teeth sparkle as she laughs. “Am not!”
I eye her up and down as I pick up my sneaker, using it as a pointer. “This wouldn’t be for someone named Matt, would it?”
Her cheeks brighten beneath her blush. “Listen now, we need a totally separate night for those details.”
I gape. “Cici!” I toss the shoe at her hip, barely nicking her.
“Florence!” She picks it up, tossing it right back.
Cici falls back on the bed, smiling to herself.
“He’s everything I’ve ever dreamed of.” She sighs.
I plop down next to her, grinning. “I couldn’t be happier for you. You deserve it.”
She props up on her elbow eyeing me sternly. “And you do too, Florence. You deserve happiness.”
I groan, shoving her away from me. “We’re done talking about me, ma’am.”
Cici rolls her wrist, her clasped watch flashing to life. “Ughh, it’s five forty-five. We better get going. Another night, I promise.” She wiggles her fingers under her chin.
A giggle slips from my lips as I wiggle back, “I’ll hold you to it then.”
A knock sounds from the door. I jump to my feet, ready to move, but Cici’s already there. “I’ll get it!” Cici pipes up, skipping from the bedroom.
I exhale longingly at her easiness. I deserve happiness.
I deserve it. I think. My mask wrestles with the muscles in my face as I fight to absorb the mantra.
A sudden loud voice snaps me from my thoughts.
“You heifers had a sleepover and didn’t invite us?
” Bear’s shoulder’s squeeze through the frame.
I shriek, scrambling out of his way as he superman jumps onto the bed. “You’re going to break it, you pig!”
Nina struts in, her hunter-green track suit outlining every inch of her tall figure.
“I didn’t get the sexy memo this morning.” Bear props on his elbow pursing his lips.
“Oh, shut up,” Nina growls, plopping down beside him.
I blink, looking from one to the other. “No offense but why are you here, in my room?” I ask, turning to Cici for help.
“We’re making a statement to our superiors.” Bear chirps. “Cici filled us in last night.”
I snort, but Nina sits up beside him, her face is as serious as a heart attack. “What kind of statement do you think you’re making?” I dare to ask.
Bear points his finger at me. “You. You are our statement alpha woman.” he says as Nina smacks his hand down.
I fold my arms and lean against the wall. “You can’t be serious,” I say in disbelief. “You’re going to get yourselves in trouble.”
Cici throws her arms dramatically in the air. “What are they going to do, Florence? Fire us all? I don’t think so.”
I stare at the floor, biting my cheek.
“Stop it.” Nina snaps, her Italian accent filtering through with command. “I see that face, and this is our decision. Not yours.”
Tugging at the ends of my curls, I groan, and step over to the bed falling backwards onto Bear’s insanely hairy legs. “Does Nyx know about this?” I look up at the burly man beneath my brows.
“It was his idea,” Bear whispers, patting my head gently.
“What do you mean?” I scrunch my nose, sitting up a little straighter.
“We shot pool down at Billy’s last night and discussed it,” Nina states, her posture unwavering on the matter.
Cici clasps her hands together, not giving me anymore space to question. “So that’s that! Jett had an errand to run this morning, or he would be here too.” She marches to the door. “Let’s go, everybody up.”
Bear stretches, the bed creaking as he covers a yawn. “I don’t know if I can, ladies… this bed is pretty comfy…”
“Up!” we bark at him.
“Okay! Okay! Geez Louis.” He jumps to his feet, grumbling.
The door clicks shut behind us as we pile out.
“We look like the freaking circus,” I mutter underneath my breath as we walk to the elevator.