Chapter 10 #2
We remain in the safety of our booth for a while before we all agree to venture out onto the rammed dance floor together.
I text both Hailey and Theo to let them know we’re here at the club if they plan on joining us, but if not, then to look after each other.
Hailey’s always been sensible, and I’ve never had to worry about Theo in the same way I’ve had to worry about Evie.
He may be the equivalent of a puppy with too much energy, but he’s always had his wits about him.
If one of my younger siblings were to get themselves into serious trouble, it would be Evie.
But she’s right here in front of me, whipping her hair in sync with every drop of the beat, so I don’t need to worry about either of them for now.
The person I do need to worry about is Connor.
We all stick together as a group on the dance floor despite being barged around by the crowd, but somehow Connor seems to be surgically attached to my side.
I glare at him every once in a while, but I don’t mean it, not really.
I can’t be mad at someone for having my best interests at heart, someone who has always had my best interests at heart.
Connor was selfless like that. He’d jump in front of a bullet if it meant saving the people he cared about.
There was one time, back when we were teenagers, when I was making a family casserole for dinner as he hung out in my kitchen with me, and I didn’t quite get the correct grip on the dish with the clunky, padded oven mitts.
It slipped out of my grasp and Connor instinctively reached out and caught the scorching dish with his bare hands before it could hit the exposed skin of my legs.
His skin was red raw, burned, but mine wasn’t, and that’s all that mattered to him in that moment.
Maybe he’s trying to save me from being burned once again, but it’s too late. There are already too many scars, too many bruises.
“I’ve really broken the seal tonight. Can’t stop pissing. Be right back,” Liam yells into my ear over the music, and as he turns and disappears through the throng of bodies, a panicked sense of urgency comes over me.
Finally, I have an opportunity to speak to Connor without Liam’s watchful gaze. I turn to him in the darkness, vibrant colors cascading over us, and find him already standing still, staring straight back at me.
I point somewhere, anywhere, and he nods.
Evie and Melissa have bonded over their love of dancing, and John and Tyler are drunk and bro-hugging each other, so none of them notices Connor and me slip away.
It’s impossible to hear a single word anyone says in this club without screaming into their ear and hoping for the best, and that’s not how I need to have this conversation with him, so I trace a route to the exit with Connor silently following at my heels.
Security stamps our hands for re-entry later.
Before I’ve even turned around to face him, Connor says, “Most people just say: I’m going to dance. But not you. You have to ask for permission. What are you doing, Addy?”
“What are you doing, Connor?” I throw back at him, pivoting around. “You don’t need to be a hero and rescue me. I can handle myself, and I can handle Liam, okay?”
Connor scoffs. “Addy, please.”
“Why did you bother coming this weekend? Why come on your best friend’s bachelor party just to try and ruin it all? Why can’t you just be happy for us?”
“Because you’re not happy,” he says sadly. “You can’t possibly be happy. Not when you’re with him.”
I shake my head, struggling to find the right words to say in order to navigate such a delicate situation. “There’s so much you don’t understand.”
“Then let me understand,” he says, stepping forward and reaching for both my hands.
His sudden touch sends a chill surging down my spine, and I know I should shake him off, back away, but I’m too pulled in by the pleading desperation in his big brown eyes.
“Help me understand what possible reason you could have for going through with this wedding? Help me understand why you want to spend the rest of your life with someone who . . .” His words trail off, and he swallows hard, unable to finish the sentence.
I can’t say it out loud, either, and I can’t give him the answers he’s looking for.
I simply whisper, “How did you know, Connor?”
“There you guys are!” Melissa’s voice interrupts, and I snap my hands back from Connor’s and immediately step around him.
Thankfully, Melissa is too drunk to clock the tension between us yet again, because she just clumsily waves her cell phone at me.
“It’s almost three in the morning back home and Tom is struggling to get Maisie to settle, so I’m going to chat to him real quick.
Oh, I’m starting to miss them!” She meanders off to find a quiet spot, and I turn to Connor.
“We better get back in there before Liam wonders where we are.”
Re-entering the club, I adjust to the blaring music and flashing lights all over again.
We push through the dance floor in search of our friends, but they have taken a break from dancing to refuel with more vodka back at the booth.
The muscles in my face feel strained and tense as I approach our booth with Connor behind me.
Liam is already back from the restrooms, pouring himself a drink.
“Where’d you guys go?” he asks as the bouncer lets us by, and the edge to his voice does not go unnoticed. He’s suspicious—and he should be suspicious, but not in the way he thinks.
So now I need to compensate. I throw a smile on my face, my arms around his shoulders, and my body into his. Except, in my haste to show affection, I knock his glass out of his hand. He abruptly pushes me away as his drink sloshes down his shirt, soaking through the fabric.
“Adelaide!” he hisses, and I flinch at the harsh tone, because I know what usually follows.
“I’m so sorry!” I grab every napkin I can find and thrust them at him, dabbing at his shirt in an effort to fix my mistake, to make him realize it’s fine, the stain will come out, the napkins will soak up the dampness.
Connor comes to my aid, offering more napkins. He tries to lighten the mood, to defend me in the way he always has, by joking, “This is what happens when we crash the bachelorette party, huh? Boozy Addy to deal with.”
“Stop it,” Liam mutters, throwing a fistful of used napkins to the ground and standing up, forcing Connor and me to take a step back from him. “I need to go change my fucking clothes. Goddamn it, Addy. Come on then.” He jerks his head at me.
“Look at those shoes,” Connor says, pointing a finger at my kitten heels. “Trust me, man, you’ll be quicker running to the room by yourself. You’ll be back in ten minutes and we’ll be right here waiting for you. You won’t miss out on the party, promise.”
I know exactly what Connor is doing. He is trying to save me from being alone with a pissed-off Liam, and that makes my heart ache in my chest. He is trying so hard, but it’s futile.
Liam fixes Connor with a hard look, then reaches for my hand. “Come on, Adelaide.”
As he leaves the booth, pulling me with him, I wish I had the strength to put up a fight. Over my shoulder, my fearful eyes are locked on Connor’s as he stands there, helpless. I know he wants me to shove Liam away, to tell him I’ll stay right here, where I’m safe in the company of others.
But I’m too terrified to discover exactly what Liam would do should I ever defy him. What he does when I’m compliant and apologetic is awful enough.
“I’m sorry,” I mouth to Connor.
He lowers his chin. “Me too.”