Chapter 26
Chapter Twenty-Six
After an entertaining breakfast with Claire and Ben, I came home to do laundry and clean the house.
I finally showered and washed my hair. I need to get it trimmed but it’s hard to find someone to cut it and the outcome is not me looking like a clown.
My curls relaxed as I got older, but I have experienced more than one terrible haircut over the years.
I have just woken up from a glorious afternoon nap on the couch with Penelope when I hear a knock on the door.
Jeff is coming home today so it won’t be Meg.
Claire and Ben are going for a hike so that leaves Beck.
She never knocks so I can assume she has misplaced her key.
All my friends have their own keys just in case they need a place to retreat and I’m not home.
Or in case of an emergency. I’m always prepared for the worst-case scenario.
I don’t bother putting on pants and go answer the door in an old, thread bare T-shirt, boy cut underwear, and knee socks. Beck won’t expect anything different on a Sunday. Who wants to wear a bra or pants when they are at home? It seems unnecessary.
Opening the door, I say, “Since when do you knock? Did you forget your key?”
I’m shocked to see Logan, his dog, and a large pizza.
“What are you doing here?” I look past him to see if anyone else is with him.
I can tell he’s freshly showered, but he looks rough. His stubble is thicker, and his chocolate brown eyes are even darker.
“I brought you an apology pizza. Can I come in?” he asks, biting the inside of his cheek.
I watch as Morgan walks right past me into the kitchen.
“I guess so. I won’t say no to pizza. Plus, your dog is already invited himself in.”
Stepping back, I allow him inside and gesture my arm towards Morgan who is now sprawled out in front of the fireplace. I turn back to see Logan looking down at my bare legs and up again. I feel myself flush at his attention. Thank god I shaved.
“Nice shirt.” He raises his eyebrows.
“Umm yeah. I have no idea where it came from.” Lies, lies, lies.
Logan had left it behind and I found it when I packed up my apartment in the city for good. It’s a great shirt and I may still wear it occasionally. No biggie.
“Funny, I remember having one just like it.” He smirks knowingly.
“That is weird.” I purse my lips and nod. “Give me a minute to put some clothes on. If you want, you can grab some plates. They are in the same place they were the last time you were here. There’s beer in the fridge.”
I look around my house glad I have tidied it. I have added a lot of personal touches over the years but in many ways, it functions the same as it did when we were kids. New furniture but the same layout. New dishes but in the same spot as my parents kept them.
“No beer for me.” He raises his hand and his face pales. “I’ll just grab some water if that’s okay.”
“Awe, are you feeling tough today? Serves you right.” Snorting in amusement at his pout, I almost feel sorry for him. “I’ll have water too. Be right back.”
Slipping into my bedroom, I close the door behind me. Leaning up against it I take a moment to collect myself. Am I okay with him being here? Yeah, I think I am. I’m very aware that this is the first time we have seen each other away from the public eye.
It’s fine. Everything is fine. Plus, he brought an apology pizza.
Stepping away, I quickly strip down. I tuck the shirt under my pillow for later, because there is no way I’m giving it back to him now.
I put on a pale peach bra and a matching thong.
Not that it matters, I dress for myself.
Rummaging through my drawers I find my favourite leggings that make my ass look great.
Also, irrelevant. He doesn’t need to see my ass.
Finally, I pull on a tight white T-shirt and a cardigan.
I check myself in the mirror. Passable. I totally didn’t put any thought into this, I continue to lie to myself as I walk back into the kitchen.
“About last night, Logan,” I pause when I see him standing at the picture window, looking at the view while holding my cat like a baby rubbing her tummy.
“Hello, sweet girl. Aren’t you pretty?” Logan speaks to her in a hushed voice.
Seriously? She doesn’t let anyone hold her and even I can’t hold her like that. What a floozy.
He turns to look at me and smiles.
“I met your cat. She’s sweet. What’s her name?”
“Pen, short for Penelope. And she’s usually not that sweet.”
“Huh, is that so?”
He looks towards Morgan who is now sound to sleep, sprawled out on his back, paws in the air with his tongue hanging from his mouth.
“Ironic how we both have pets named after our favourite characters from our favourite TV show.” He tilts his head and raises an eyebrow.
“Huh. Never made the connection before.” Liar, liar pants on fire.
“Sure, you didn’t.”
He places Penelope back on a perch in the cat tree and scratches her ears before meeting me back in the kitchen where our pizza is sitting on the table. He already has it set with plates, glasses of ice water, and napkins. Very domestic of him.
We sit in awkward silence eating our pizza for a few minutes before we both speak at the same time.
“Why are you here, Logan?”
“I came to apologize for last night.”
Setting my pizza down, I reach for my napkin and wipe my mouth. Leaning back in my chair, I meet his eyes.
“What exactly are you apologizing for?” I ask.
He tips his head back slightly and rubs his hands over his stubbled jaw before he meets my eyes again.
“I’m sorry I was rude to Danny and made you feel uncomfortable.
I’m sorry I accosted you in the hall. That really wasn’t okay.
I’m not trying to make an excuse, but I didn’t anticipate how seeing you with someone else would affect me.
” He pauses for a moment before continuing, “I knew I wouldn’t like it, but I didn’t expect to feel so jealous. And I also drank way too much.”
“You don’t say,” I deadpan. “First of all, I don’t owe you an explanation, but it’s not a secret that Danny and I are no longer dating and haven’t been for a few years. We still enjoy each other’s company when he visits. He has been a good friend.”
I don’t know why I’m compelled to tell him any of this.
“Yeah, I know all about Danny,” he mumbles, shifting in his chair.
“And how exactly do you know ‘all about Danny’?’” I glare, using my fingers to air quote.
I swear if Riot has been feeding him private information about me, I’ll have his balls.
“Okay, not all about him. I just know that you dated and broke up.”
“And how exactly did you hear that?”
“Let’s not pretend I never asked about you, okay? But don’t worry, Riot is like a vault. I asked and he censored what he told me. Fuck, I didn’t even know you moved here.”
“Riot has been a good friend.”
“I know. I would like to try and be friends with you again too.”
“Why? Why do you think you want to be my friend again?”
“I’ve missed your friendship.” He pauses again and takes a drink.
“I’m sorry about how we broke up. I’m sorry I stayed away. What I did was inexcusable and I would like to talk about it if you are willing.”
Shaking my head, I reply, “I’m not. You really need to ask yourself why you are apologizing. Are you saying it to make yourself feel better? To ease your conscience? Or are you trying to make me feel better? Because I don’t need that – I’m fine. We are years past any explanation and that apology.”
“I hurt you. I left you when you needed me and I’ve regretted it every day since. I just think there are some things you need to know.”
“You’re not listening to me, Logan. I’ve moved on.
I don’t want an explanation. Maybe someday but today is not it.
I can accept that you are living here again.
I acknowledge that we share friends and will be spending time around each other.
I’m willing to try and rebuild some sort of friendship, but it’s not going to be the same because trusting you won’t come easy. ”
I watch him gather his thoughts and swallow before he says, “Okay, I understand. But I do have another apology to make.”
“Oh yeah?” I sit back in my chair and tilt my head. This should be good.
“I’m sorry about calling you last night. I hope I wasn’t inappropriate or anything. I feel like an idiot.”
“It’s fine. However, you did look like an idiot.” I grin.
Pinching the bridge of his nose, he looks at me.
“You saw that? Of course you did. I’m not sure how I’m going to live this down. Do you know anyone who can scrub the internet?”
“I don’t. But even if you can figure that out, which is highly unlikely, the citizens of Emerley never forget. Ever.” I laugh.
“Don’t remind me.” He places his elbows on the table and holds his head for a moment before sitting back up and giving is head a slight shake, mumbling fuck my life under his breath.
I snort laugh.
“Despite everything that has happened, I was wondering if we can try to get to know each other again? Try to be friends. Sitting here talking with you is – nice. I really have missed this.”
“How would you like to do that?” I’m not trying to be difficult, but I can’t help pushing back.
Maybe he deserves difficult.
“How about you tell me something I don’t know.”
“Like what?” This is such a bad idea.
“Work with me, Hannah, I’m trying here.” His eyes are pleading. “You have already told me a little about the gallery. How about you tell me about moving out here.”
“Okay. Dad left the cabin to me in his will,” I share. “He never told me, so I was really surprised and incredibly grateful. I moved here when I was around twenty-four.”
“It looks great.” He looks around my space. It’s not huge but it’s perfect for me.
“Thank you. I love it here, and I’m proud of the home I have created.”