16. Chapter 16
Harlow
I’m still riding the high of getting off with Gray as we stumble after each other into the hotel room. My pants are… not comfortable at all. Between how tight they are and, you know, the cum, they need to go.
As soon as Gray shuts the door behind us, I start stripping them off.
I had fun tonight. Until someone decided to put their hands on my husband, of course.
I’ve never been jealous over Grayson before.
Not really. Not like that. I came back with our drinks and saw red because, what do you mean there are a hundred hot men on this dance floor and you wanna touch mine?
No. No way. Not happening.
And I’m not stupid. I know Gray’s not mine. Not really. But for the next three months? He is. He said it and I said it, and I’m not going to feel bad for being jealous when we made a commitment. An after-marriage commitment, but still.
“Jesus,” Gray groans, and I glance back at him over my shoulder.
“What?”
He’s covering his eyes, and after a second, he moves his hands. “I’m trying incredibly hard to keep myself in check, and you are not making it easy. I had no idea you’d be like this.”
“Like what?” I ask, cocking my head.
“So.” He waves a hand through the air, gesturing up and down in my direction, and I glance down at myself. “That,” he finishes.
I can’t help but frown. “What does that mean?”
“It means,” he says, drawing in a deep breath. “That I didn’t expect you to be so… everything, and I’m not sure how I’m supposed to resist it.”
That gets my attention, and I snap my head up, locking eyes with him. “Why are you trying to resist it? I thought you said you wanted to do this whole thing for real. You said you wanted more. You didn’t have to say it if you didn’t mean it. You could have said no.”
I’m trying hard not to cry. Not because Gray doesn’t want me, but because I feel like I pressured him into something he doesn’t want to do.
A pit opens in my stomach, the alcohol that was filling my veins with a sweet buzz souring in an instant.
What’s worse is that I’m having this conversation in a see-through mesh shirt and my cum-stained briefs.
At least Gray has the advantage of still wearing his pants.
Gray’s eyes widen, then he’s striding toward me. My stomach flips when he steps into my space, his hands cupping my jaw and tilting my head back. “Let’s talk about why your first reaction is always bad.”
“What do you mean?” I whisper, staring into his deep brown eyes.
He watches me for a second, then tugs my lip free of my teeth. I hadn’t even realized I was biting at it.
“We’ve known each other our whole lives, Harlow. We’ve been through a million things together. Why are you so quick to assume I mean something badly when I don’t?”
I don’t answer because I don’t know what to say. It doesn’t really matter because I’m pretty sure the question is rhetorical anyway, since Gray keeps on talking like he didn’t even ask me anything.
“If I said I wanted more, it’s because I do. I’m just worried about what it means for us. Not now, but later.” His eyes dart up, and he toys with the tips of my hair. “This is three months, right? That’s what we agreed on,” he says, eyes finding mine.
I nod because it is what we agreed on, but—
“Okay, so that means we have to find a way to make this work without either of us getting hurt at the end of it.”
Or we could just not end it at all. That’s a crazy thought, though, and not at all what Gray agreed to. I need to not be greedy.
Grayson smiles, his eyes lighting up. “You jump into everything you do feet first, and I love that about you. I always have, but I just want to make sure we’re going to come out the other side with our friendship still intact.”
My heart skips. I can’t imagine not having Gray as my best friend. He means everything to me. He’s been the most constant thing in my life for as long as I can remember.
“If the alley is any indication,” he continues, searching my eyes, “we have the chemistry.” I nod along with his words because, yeah, I’m not sure I’ve ever had an orgasm that good, and he didn’t even touch me.
Not really. “And I want more. So much more. You have no idea how hard it’s been to keep my hands to myself.
But I also want to make sure our friendship comes first.”
“I can’t live without you, Harlow,” he whispers. “And I don’t want to.”
“You won’t,” I croak out. “I promise. Our friendship is important to me too. It’s my favorite thing in the world, and I want to preserve it more than anything else.”
The corners of Gray’s lips turn up in a smile. “Okay. I think that needs to be our priority, then.”
I’m resisting the urge to pout, and it’s a damn shame that Gray knows me so well because even though I don’t think I ever go full pout, he still chuckles. “I still wanna have more and do more. I just want to make sure we prioritize friendship first. I don’t want that to change. You promise?”
I guess that makes sense. I just need to make sure that friendship stays at the forefront of my mind. Shouldn’t be hard where Gray is concerned since he’s been at the forefront of my mind my entire life. “I promise. Do you?”
“I promise.”
I blow out a relieved breath. Who knew having a sexual relationship with my husband would take so much logistics.
“Now what?” I ask softly.
“Now,” Gray says, his hands landing on my hips and sliding up the bare skin on my sides. He catches the fabric of my shirt, his eyes following the movement as he pulls it up and over my head. “Now, I’d like to get you undressed and in the shower.”
I’m standing nearly bare in front of him, and I keep eye contact as he hooks his fingers in the waistband of my briefs and pushes them down my hips. They fall to the ground, and I step out of them, kicking them off to the side.
I’ve never been fully naked around Gray. Not once. Not where he can see me, anyway. The massage parlor doesn’t count. At least now I don’t have to worry about if my dick is gonna behave.
He slowly drags his eyes down my body, taking his time and looking me over. It makes me feel squirmy and exposed, but it’s kinda doing it for me, and my cock twitches at the way he’s looking at me.
“Are you gonna get naked too?”
Without looking away from me, he takes a step back, whipping his shirt off before unbuttoning his pants quickly and pushing them, along with his boxers, to the floor. I don’t have the restraint that he does, so as soon as his cock is free, I drop my gaze to it.
Ugh, it’s big, even mostly soft, and I want to sink to my knees right now. Let it swell on my tongue and fill the back of my throat so I can taste his cum. I want it so badly that I take a step toward him, my mouth falling open in anticipation.
“Not yet.”
His words stop me dead, and I glance up at him. He’s wearing a stupid-as-fuck sexy smirk. “Why not yet? Are you gonna tell me not yet forever? How do you even know what I’m thinking about?”
Grayson laughs. Actually laughs. “Well, first off, I know you really well, and second off, you’re staring at it and licking your lips like you want me to choke you with it.” Yes, fucking please. “But I’m sweaty and gross and covered in dried cum from earlier—”
“I don’t care about that.”
“I know,” Gray says, chuckling again. “But I do. I don’t want the first time I have you on your knees for me to be like this.”
The first time? On my knees for him? Gray has a dirty mouth, and I’m nothing if not a whore for a dirty mouth. Josh never talked to me during sex, and that was fine, really. But I just know it wouldn’t be like that with Grayson.
“You’re already hard,” Gray muses, as if I didn’t already know that. He steps closer, closing his hand around the base of my cock. The heat of his palm sears my skin, and I choke on a breath. “Go get in the shower, pretty boy. Once we’re clean, I’ll give you both your wishes.”
“Both my wishes?” I rasp out, my stomach hot with arousal and my cock aching in his hand. Wait, did he just call me pretty boy?
He strokes me once from base to tip, effectively distracting me from the pet name, twisting his palm around my leaking head, then leans closer, brushing his lips over my ear. “Yeah, you can lick the water off me, and I’ll put you on your knees.”
I’m not sure I’ve ever moved so fast in my damn life, which is impressive when you consider that fast is my default speed.
By the time Gray makes it into the bathroom and is leaning against the doorframe, looking every bit like a wet dream, I’ve got the water turned on and am working on adjusting the temperature.
“Is it ready?”
My cock throbs at the low timbre of his voice.
It’s actually a crime that I hadn’t noticed how hot he was before.
I mean, okay, of course he’s hot. Duh. Dark hair and dark eyes, and tan skin and muscles.
What’s not to love? But fuck. There’s my best friend is objectively an attractive man, and then there’s I want to swallow my best friend’s cock.
I’m firmly planted in the second category.
I step into the shower, waving a hand at Gray to join me instead of answering him. He climbs in behind me, catching me around the stomach and dragging my back to his chest as he moves us under the spray of water.
“Did you look at your throat?” he whispers, brushing his lips along the sensitive skin.
I shake my head, tilting it further so he has better access. “No, why?”
“You’re all marked up,” he breathes, dragging his tongue over my thundering pulse point and down the side of my neck. “You don’t even need a ring for people to know you’re mine, do you? It’s all over your skin.”
Fuck. That’s so fucking hot. I whimper, grabbing his arm and clutching him tightly so he doesn’t let me go.
“Let’s get cleaned up.”
I reluctantly drop his arm, and he steps back. “You go first.”
Part of me doesn’t want to wash my hair, only because it’ll take so much longer, but Gray’s right; I was covered in sweat, and I know for sure my hair is disgusting.