Chapter Sixteen
SIXTEEN
HAILEY’S DAILY RULE FOR SUCCESS:
It’s the final moments of preparation that mean the most.
Liam and Sonia couldn’t have asked for a more perfect day for a wedding. Staff finish setting up for the ceremony, positioning chairs in front of the flower arches in the courtyard of the Banks Resort, and soft music plays over the speakers as I scan the preparations from the bridal suite balcony. Dressed in my maid of honor dress, hair and makeup done, I just want this day over with. The last few weeks have been...enlightening. I realized that I need to let this happen so the future I saw for Liam doesn’t become a reality. So I’m not the one who destroys his happiness.
I don’t have feelings for him anymore and that has never been so clear as it is now, when my feelings for Warren are hitting like a brick to the forehead. He’s nothing like I expected and so much more than I’d allowed myself to believe.
Reaching out to him the night before to help with the favors had been a last-ditch attempt to see if maybe the spark between us was something...or could be... But he’d obviously come from a date, and he confirmed that the night between us didn’t mean anything.
But then so did I.
After this wedding, we will go back to...what?
I haven’t seen him today, but I know he’s in the groom suite getting ready with Liam and the other groomsmen. My heart races thinking about seeing him in a tuxedo amid all the love and gooey emotions. I hope he’s not a distraction to my main mission—get the vows locked in.
My cell phone chimes and I glance at the selfie of Sonia—looking completely perfect in her wedding dress—with a message that reads:
Photos are done. We’re ready to go. I’m getting fucking married!
Yep. Better get fucking married so I can stop sweating and fighting the mild anxiety attack that something will go wrong.
The bridal party is here. The venue is ready. Guests are arriving. Party favors have been placed on the tables. In an hour, I can relax.
I leave the room and knock once at the groom suite next door, before using the key card to enter.
Warren’s the only one inside. He paces, his cell phone in his hand. Dressed in his tuxedo pants, white dress shirt, sleeves rolled and buttons undone, he’s the most gorgeous, aggravatingly undressed man I’ve ever seen. I want to scold him for the lack of polish when it’s so close to go time, but I’m drooling over the sight of his forearms and chest. Polished is overrated. His dark hair is gelled in a predictably messy look and he obviously forgot the memo to shave, but damn if that lingering stubble isn’t the most tempting thing I’ve ever seen.
He stops when he sees me enter and his gaze sweeps from my face to my strappy stilettos, all the way back. When his heated, lust-filled expression meets mine again, my cheeks flush with heat. So much for the other night not meaning anything.
We are both so full of shit.
“You almost ready?” It sounds anything but the casual, unfazed tone I was aiming for.
“Yeah,” he says though he looks anything but. The confident-bordering-on-egotistical guy I know is nowhere in sight. He looks panicked, slightly green, and sweaty.
“What’s wrong?” My heart stops. “Oh my God, did you lose the rings?”
He shoots me a look. “Don’t get your hopes up.” He reaches into his pocket and produces the wedding bands.
I breathe a genuine sigh of relief. I’d told Sonia they were safer with me, but she insisted we let Warren perform his best man duties. “I told you, I’m not trying to stop this wedding.”
Warren’s barely listening as he scans his phone again and looks frustrated.
“Seriously, what is it?”
“This best man speech.”
My eyes widen. “You actually wrote one? Not just gonna wing it?”
“This is a big deal.”
“ I know that. I just didn’t think you did.”
Warren sighs and grabs his jacket. He slides into it and again I admire how handsome he looks. His tall, muscular frame fills out the jacket and his broad chest and shoulders remind me of how safe I’d felt wrapped in his arms.
“Let’s go,” he says, heading toward the door.
“Wait. Let’s hear it.”
“Don’t trust me?”
Such a loaded question. With a best man speech or with my heart? The jury’s still out on both. “If you’re worried about it, it might be good to rehearse in front of an audience.”
Warren hesitates then reaches for his cell phone. He opens the speech, takes a deep breath, pauses. “What if it’s bad?”
“Better for me to hear it than the bride and groom. Go.”
Warren shoots me a look at my bossiness, but clears his throat and starts to read. “Love is fucked up.”
My eyes widen, but I wholeheartedly agree with the statement, so I allow him to continue. I need to hear where this is going.
“It has a way of completely turning a person’s world upside down, messing up well-laid plans and making its victim reconsider everything they ever thought they knew.” He glances up at me then continues. “It has a way of sneaking up, knocking you off guard and tearing through your soul. But it also has a way of healing, of opening a person’s eyes to a different future they’d never dared to imagine—one full of unexpected passion in moments of love and in moments of pain. We can live without everything else. But what’s a life without love? To the beautiful couple...”
My mouth is agape when he glances up.
“Well?”
“You wrote that?”
He looks worried again. “Is it too much? Too sappy?”
“No! It’s...um good. Really good actually.” Has me rethinking my Aristotle quotes.
Warren studies me, unconvinced. “You’re not just saying that to be nice?”
“When am I ever nice...to you?”
We stare at one another, share a moment. Chemistry sizzles between us along with a lot of unsaid words. But now’s not the time...
“You look amazing, by the way,” he says, his voice deep and gruff.
Or maybe it is...
I swallow hard as his gaze takes me in. “Are you just saying that to be nice?”
“When am I ever nice...to you?”
We move closer together, our eyes locked on one another. There’s a moment when he looks at me and his expression changes. I’ve started to live for that moment.
Warren reaches for me and I immediately step into his arms. We kiss. Soft, uncertain, hesitant at first, then more passionate. I cling to his suit jacket as he backs me up against a wall and kisses me senseless.
His hands grip my waist, fingers digging into the silky fabric of the dress as his mouth searches mine for answers neither of us are willing to verbalize. Challenging me to either back away or go all in.
I know what I want to do, but I still don’t know if this is just a physical thing for Warren. I don’t want to be just another conquest to him and I’m not even sure I’m capable of going all in, so keeping the guardrail around my heart is safe...
Yet, my body sinks into him and every inch of our bodies connects as I wrap my arms around his neck and deepen the kiss.
He reaches up and grips my wrists, placing them above my head on the wall as he breaks away to kiss my neck, my chest, my collar bone and down over the swell of my breasts through the fabric of the dress.
I moan as my entire body trembles with a desire for Warren that I’ve never felt for anyone before.
He reluctantly pulls away far too soon, leaving me far too unsatisfied. He hesitates a beat, before saying, “I’ve been thinking...what if I don’t want to go back to thinking of you as just the woman who ruined my career?”
His burning gaze has my heart pounding even faster than his kisses.
I open my mouth to answer, with no idea what’s about to come out, but Warren’s cell phone chimes in his pocket. He looks annoyed at the interrupted moment as he reaches for it and takes a step back. He reads a text and tucks it away. “Sonia. Says we’re needed in the courtyard.”
Disappointed, I nod as we move away from one another. I straighten my dress and a quick glance in the mirror reveals my lipstick has disappeared. I glance at Warren’s lips and see traces of it there. I step forward and reach up to wipe it from his mouth. Our gazes are locked on one another—his last question, still unanswered, lingering in the tension-filled air.
He reaches for my hand, holds it for a beat, then slowly releases it. “I’ll go get the groom,” he says huskily.
I nod again. Somehow, I’ve lost my voice. More so, I’ve lost my sense of reason. Warren wants to continue this...whatever this is... It’s what I want too, but can I go all in with him?
He heads toward the door and opens it.
I search my mind for something to say...but I’ve got nothing.
He pauses, sends me a final questioning look before leaving the suite.
As the door closes behind him, air escapes my lungs and, in that moment, I know exactly what I want.
But he’s gone.
The sex with Hailey was fantastic, but that kiss was on a whole other level. I’ve never been so attracted to a woman before. She drives me fucking wild in all ways. Being with her doesn’t make sense, but I’ve let go of trying to reason these feelings I have for her. They are what they are.
Unfortunately, her lack of response moments before has me regretting voicing how I feel. Maybe I’ve read things wrong. Maybe it is just a physical thing for her.
I turn the corner and see Liam pacing the hallway. I take a deep breath and force thoughts of my crash and burn from my mind as I approach him. Need to focus on my buddy and getting him married. Then this whole thing will be over...
“It’s go time.” I clap my hands and nod in the direction of the courtyard, forcing enthusiasm into my voice. Whether this marriage succeeds or not, I’ll be there for Liam. Right now he needs me to stand next to him at the altar and that’s what I’m prepared to do.
But Liam shakes his head. “I’m not ready.”
“You forget something in the groom suite?”
“No. I mean I’m not ready to get married.”
I walk toward him calmly, but inside I’m freaking out. I’m not exactly cut out for this. I literally just decided I wanted to give dating a try...real dating with one woman in particular.
“Take a breath,” I tell Liam.
“We’ve only been together seven months. This is too soon.”
You think? I should just agree and help him escape, but I know that’s not what he wants or expects from me right now. This is simply a cry for help. He wants to be talked off the ledge. I think fast. “You love her, right?”
“I think so.”
Not the most encouraging answer. Is convincing him the right thing to do? Shit, where’s Hailstorm when I need her. The realization that she’s the only one I want to rescue me from this situation is so telling, I nearly black out. I blink. Focus on Liam. I need him to relax.
“Not exactly vow material, man,” I say teasingly, hoping to break his intensity.
“I haven’t even written my vows.”
“What? Liam! The ceremony is about to start.” Sweat pools on my lower back and I tug at the neck of my dress shirt. This is a five-star, luxury resort—where the hell is the ventilation?
Liam nods. “This is what I’m talking about. Last night, I’m sitting there trying to write how I feel about Sonia and I couldn’t quite put it into words. And the more I tried to talk about compatibility, the more I realized we’re not compatible. And then I tried talking about future goals, and all I could think about was that game at the engagement party...”
“That was just a game.”
“But what if Hailey’s right? What if I’m giving up my dreams and I end up regretting it? Resenting Sonia?”
I sigh. “Hailey’s not right and she admits she was skeptical about the relationship at first, but now even she’s convinced you two are perfect together.” Overstating a little, but I can hear the music playing in the courtyard and time’s running out.
Unfortunately Liam looks disappointed. “She is?”
Why the hell is he concerned about Hailey? “Yes.”
He seems pensive for a moment, then he seems to calm. “Okay, I just need another minute. Go on out. I’ll be there in a few.”
I hesitate but check my watch. I’m supposed to be seating guests. I tap him on the shoulder. “You got this,” I tell him, then pray he actually does as I head down the hallway.
As I turn the corner, I see Hailey walking toward me. “Where’s Liam? The ceremony is about to start,” she says.
“He said he’ll be out in a minute.” Is there time to kiss her again? Does she want that? Our conversation was cut short so I have no idea where I stand with her...and it is torture.
“Is he okay?” she asks.
Right. Focus on getting Liam down the aisle, then figure out where things stand with Hailey. “Fine. Cold feet, that’s all.”
Apparently, that’s not fine. “Cold feet?!”
I know I should be concerned about Liam, but all I can feel right now is relief that she’s freaked out not relieved or hopeful.
“Maybe you should talk to him.”
She hesitates, checks the time on her cell phone. “Okay...go on out there. Try to delay a few minutes.”
“I’m on it,” I say.
Hailey heads off to find Liam and I stare after her a moment, an odd foreboding in the pit of my stomach, before heading into the courtyard to try to delay a wedding.
I find Liam outside on the upper balcony overlooking the courtyard. He’s leaning on the rail, staring at the guests waiting below. “Hey, you,” I say softly, afraid to spook him.
Liam turns and looks relieved to see me. “Everything looks beautiful,” he says in an almost trancelike tone. Then his gaze sweeps over me and a look of sincere attraction appears on his face. “So do you.”
Uh-oh. That expression is targeted at the wrong woman.
A month ago, I’d have relished the compliment. Started planning my own wedding with him based on the way he was looking at me. The way he used to look at me. Now I’m freaked out by it. This can’t go sideways.
“Thank you,” I say politely, but more importantly, “So does your bride-to-be.”
Liam looks conflicted. “How do I know I’m not making a huge mistake, Hails?”
He most likely is, but if he’s made it this far, I know a big part of him wants this. He’s nervous, he’s uncertain, but he wouldn’t be here right now if he didn’t love Sonia, and whether that love lasts a week or a lifetime, he should continue giving it a chance. I walk toward him. “I guess you don’t, but that’s what love is, right? Taking a leap of faith, not knowing the outcome, but trusting in the connection you two have.”
Liam stares at me. “You and I had a connection once.”
“But that was a long time ago.”
“Was it? I mean, the other night...”
I shift uncomfortably. “That shouldn’t have happened. Nothing happened, really. Just a bit of nostalgia popping up...like a regurgitation of past feelings.” I can’t possibly make it sound less appealing that.
Unfortunately, Liam reaches for my waist and draws me closer. “Maybe it was the intervention I needed to see that this is a mistake. There’s still something between us.”
I press my hands against his chest. “I was manipulating you.”
He holds tight. “I don’t think that’s all it was.”
“Believe me, it was.” I take a deep breath. Time to fess up. As much as I possibly can. I open my mouth...
But suddenly, Liam’s is pressed against it, preventing me from voicing any argument. I gape in surprise and he takes it as an opening—literally—to shove his tongue into mine.
I expect the “kiss” to have impact, despite the ill-timed nature and the fact that I’ve gotten over these feelings for him. But it doesn’t. No lingering sentiments of first love coming back to tug at heartstrings. No memories of fiery passionate kisses from our youth to cloud the mind. No sense of longing or fulfillment...
Just guilt and a slight repulsion.
Liam’s actually a really bad kisser.
Not the point. Pull it together, Hailey!
I try to push him away, but his grip on me tightens and my panic only increases when I hear the first gasp from a guest below, which ultimately leads to chaos and me running for my life.