Chapter 24
Twenty-Four
My body is exhausted, and my feet feel as though they might fall off, but still, I cannot sleep.
Every time I close my eyes I am confronted with memories of floating around the ballroom and at times I swear I can still hear the string instruments of the musicians.
In those peaceful moments I remember how it felt to be held by Amir, to have his complete and undivided attention.
Inevitably though, Kit works his way into my mind and my body reacts.
Even now, I am staring up at the ceiling, scowling and my skin breaks out into goosebumps and tingles work their way from my head all the way down to my toes.
The ball continued on for several more hours after Kit left and I cannot remember how many Lords I danced with.
Most of them were fishing for gossip on the prince and the mysterious Sir Kristof.
Unfortunately for them, I gave them nothing and many of them left with aching feet from where I tripped over them.
Amir is a much better and more patient dance partner.
I was able to spend some time with Ella who had the time of her life.
There were several moments where I noticed several of the nobilities children around the same age as her try to strike up conversations.
Honestly, seeing that made attending the ball worth it, my heart warmed at her happy expression.
I had looked for Caleb, hoping to speak with him, but he had disappeared.
Eventually I was allowed to leave and Abbie met me at my rooms to help me out of my dress and ready myself for bed.
It should have been simple, I’m tired and have had a long day, yet my mind will not switch off.
Rubbing my hand across my face, I huff out a breath, frustrated at my lack of sleep.
Something that I am unable to ignore any longer is that my room feels different.
It has always been a safe place for me, like a refuge, but for some reason it feels different tonight.
Ever since I awoke from my nap earlier today, I have felt shifty and uncomfortable here, as though I’m being watched.
Closing my eyes I try to ignore the feeling and clear my thoughts.
“This is a warning, dear Kiara.” Kit’s words whisper through my mind, providing the true reason I am unable to drift off. “Keeping your distance is the only way to protect them.”
Is he right? Will Ella and Amir only get hurt by my presence?
What about Abbie? She has become a confidant to me that I have come to rely on.
The thought of any of them being hurt is abhorrent to me, and especially if I am the cause.
My situation means that I am unable to physically distance myself from them as I cannot leave the palace, which Kit already knows.
Meaning he must be suggesting that I emotionally distance myself from them.
Could I really do that? Ella would be broken hearted; it would be like her family abandoning her all over again.
The other comment that keeps playing through my mind is how Kit described my new life here.
A beautiful lie. No one can ever know the truth and my situation is unexpected.
When I told the lie about my magic, I did it to save both Ella and my life.
Everything that has happened since has been completely out of my hands.
That doesn’t stop the guilt from eating me up inside.
Why did Kit have to spoil that moment for me?
Completely frustrated, I roll onto my side and huff out a breath as I try to get comfortable.
Can a demon really question the morality of my decisions?
I don’t want to be thinking about him and I shouldn’t let him get to me.
To my surprise I had a nice time tonight, and I won’t let him take that from me.
Then why do I see his face when I close my eyes?
Growling with frustration I bury my face into the pillow, hitting the mattress with my fist and imagining it’s his face.
A knock on the door makes me freeze. Lifting my head, I strain my ears but I don’t hear anything.
Am I imagining things- another knock. Sitting upright, I frown in the direction of the door.
Who would be at my bedroom this late? The moon is still high in the sky so there are still hours until sunrise and the palace is quiet and peaceful.
As soon as that thought enters my mind the knock sounds again, only more desperate this time.
Whoever it is clearly needs to speak to my urgently.
I should ignore it... A twinge of fear works through me, what if it’s Ella or something had happened to her?
No, if it was her, she wouldn’t have knocked, just barged in.
I take a deep breath and stare at the closed door, but ultimately my curiosity gets the better of me.
Swinging my legs out of bed, I reach for a piece of amethyst that I keep on the small bedside table, and clutch it tightly in my hand.
Instantly I feel the calming, protective energy settle over me.
I stand and hurry over to the door, opening it just enough so I can see the person waiting on the other side. The Queen.
Gasping at the haggard figure standing in my doorway, I swing open the door, throwing caution to the wind.
“Your majesty,” I greet in shock inclining my head at the last moment. What is the queen doing here? She’s never been to my rooms before, in fact we have only ever spoken that once after my ceremony, so it makes no sense that she is here.
Scanning her from head to toe, I take in the crazed look in her eyes.
Dressed in nothing but a nightgown, her hair is balled up on the top of her head, strands of dark hair escaping its hold and dropping into her face.
She’s staring at me, but there’s a vacant look there which tells me she’s not really seeing me.
Something isn’t right here and my heart squeezes painfully in my chest. Is the queen having an episode? Usually, she has guards and ladies’ maids with her at all time, but she seems to be alone.
“Where is it?” Her raspy voice sounds nothing like the smooth cultured woman I spoke to previously.
Confusion must be written across my features even though I try to dampen the feeling. She needs help, and I want to offer that if I can.“Where is what, your majesty?
“I know it is here; I can smell it all over you!” She pushes past me and I stumble back as she hurries into my room.
Lifting her head she starts sniffing, like a bloodhound on the hunt.
The accusation doesn’t wound me as I genuinely have no idea what she is looking for.
However, as she rootles around my room, I lower my head surreptitiously to sniff my clothes. Nothing.
The Queen starts opening drawers and pulling out clothes, throwing things across the room in her desperate search, getting more irritated as time goes on and she still hasn’t found what she’s looking for.
Whatever is happening for the Queen right now, I cannot offer her the help she needs, that much is clear now.
How do I get her out of my room though without offending her. After all, she is still the Queen.
“Your majesty, I don’t know what you are looking for, but if you come back in the morning, I can help you look.”
“No!” She whirls around and pokes her finger at me, face enraged. “I know the scent of a demon from a mile away!”
My heart drops like a stone. She knows. The blood drains from my face and I break out in a cold sweat.
If the Queen was fully focused on me it would be clear from my body language that I’m hiding something.
Not the demon that she’s looking for, but the truth about my magic.
The Queen became addicted to demon power, and somehow she knew that Kit had been at the ball today, and somehow followed that back to me.
I am bound to Kit, does that mean I smell of his power, or can she sense him because we were pressed up against each other at the ball?
I don’t know what to do. From what I have witnessed, most of the palace treat her delicately, none really believing her during one of her ‘outbursts’.
It’s possible that even if she was to tell anyone about my demon connection that no one would take any notice.
Is that a chance that I can risk though?
She crosses the room toward me, one shaky step at a time, her aggression gone as quickly as it appeared. “Where is it? I need its power.” With quivering hands she reaches out to me, her beautiful face a mask of pure desperation. “Please, just a taste, I am withering away.”
“There is no demon here, majesty.” I speak as kindly as I can, hoping that she can see the truth of my statement, yet I am also firm in my denial. She needs to understand Kit isn’t here and leave me be.
My words don’t have that effect though and only seem to throw her into a fit of rage.
With an otherworldly screech, she throws herself at me, catching me off guard and scratching at my face with her surprisingly sharp nails.
We both fall to the ground in a tumble of limbs and I lift my arms to protect my face but her spindly hands close around my throat with unnatural strength.
“Call it here!” She orders, hands clamping down over my windpipe.
Gasping for breath I desperately try to fight her off but she is far stronger than she looks and I’m losing strength too quickly.
My survival instincts have disappeared, and I feel completely stunned.
This has happened before. My body is frozen- no, it’s not, I am able to move, I can do something about this.
Ignore the strange echoing thoughts, I start thrashing again to get her off me.
She doesn’t budge. Why am I so weak, I should be able to throw her off.
My throat is almost completely closed off and even if I wanted to speak, I couldn’t.
I need help before it’s too late. There’s no way I can call out, and I need to make a noise to get attention. My mind goes to the crystal in my hand. Gripping it tightly, I swing my arm up and smash the gem into her skin. It’s sharp and I know I’ve reached my target thanks to her screech of pain.
Oxygen, at last. Taking a deep breath, I cough violently, my throat screaming with pain, but my respite only lasts a second.
The Queen slams me into the ground by the shoulder, my head rebounding off the tiled floor.
Panic fills me as her hands return to my neck, knowing that if she deprives me of air much longer, I will die.
She squeezes tighter, black dots appearing in my vision as the lack of oxygen has its effects, but still I fight. Thrashing and flailing with all of my strength, I try to throw her off me, but she is too strong. Unnaturally strong.
I should call Kit to me, he seems to be able to read my thoughts and would stop her from killing me. No, that’s what she wants and it would shatter everything I have built here. If he turns up to help me, then she will know the truth and will be able to hold that over me for life.
“Lady is everything alright- Oh!” Abbie’s voice filters through as she steps into the room.
I have no idea how she came to be here in my room in the middle of the night, perhaps the gods are looking over me.
My vision is dull and blurry, however I can hear her calling for help and the heavy sound of running feet.
Men’s voices sound, all so loud as they shout orders and pull the Queen away from me.
Her resulting wail is enough to wake the dead.
My windpipe finally freed, I take a deep breath, only to fall into a coughing fit, each raspy breath like razors in my throat. My head is throbbing, and although I can breathe once more, my body has suffered enough.
Eyes rolling into the back of my head and I fall into unconsciousness.