Chapter 19 #2
“Same thing he’s wanted since I left. For me to come back and take my place at his side.” He picks up the bowl of icing, giving it another half-hearted stir. “Think he’s getting a bit desperate, though. Wants me back doing fieldwork.”
Will takes the bowl gently before the mixture gets overworked. “How come?”
“The veteran protests are escalating. I mean, we were there, we know they’re escalating, but there’s credible information that individuals are being targeted too.” A heavy sigh, despondent and conflicted. “I could help. I could protect people.”
“Do you want to?”
Nathan looks up, his green eyes grave. “Not for him. Not for someone who only cares about me for what my Gift can bring to them.”
“I’m so sorry he makes you feel that way. No one deserves that kind of treatment. You’re so much more than your Gift, Nate. You’re kind. You’re warm. You’re funny. You’re…” Will trails to a sudden halt.
“I’m…?” Nathan looks up, a flash of amusement cutting through his solemnity.
Will can’t look away even as he opts for a phrase less direct than incredibly fuckable. “Quite nice looking.”
The corners of his eyes crinkle. “I’m glad you think so. Feeling’s mutual.”
They stand motionless, smiling at each other, the perfect moment for a kiss stretching out taut until the instructor hands Nathan a flexible chopping board. “You might want to fan those cakes, or you won’t have time to decorate them.”
“Fan the cakes?” Nathan looks at him, utterly bemused. Will steps closer, taking the board and using it to fan cool air over the cakes until understanding breaks over his face. “Gotcha. I can do it.”
He does the icing too, painstaking with his piping bag, tongue poking out of his mouth the whole time. The first few are a bit wonky, swirls of icing wobbling a little as they wind their way around the cake, but his skill grows with each attempt.
“Not bad,” Will murmurs, admiring his work. “You’re a natural. You want sprinkles?”
Nate beams, a vision of happiness. “Of course. You choose what kind.”
“Hearts. Seems appropriate.”
His smile grows even broader. “Perfect.”
The cupcakes end up decorated with tiny heart-shaped sprinkles in every colour of the rainbow. Just the sight of them is enough to make Will smile. The sight of Nate looking at them, surely enough to warm the most commitment-phobic of hearts.
“Can we try one?” Nathan asks, his face ridiculously cute with hope.
Will grabs a knife and slices one of the cakes neatly in two, taking half for himself and pushing the other over towards his boyfriend.
His boyfriend, who jams the cake directly into his mouth, icing smearing over his top lip on the way.
Will hides his smile behind a more reasonably sized bite. It’s good for a first attempt; a simple vanilla sponge topped with icing that’s a little too heady with rose. “You like it, then?”
“The icing’s too strong, I think?” Nate licks his top lip clean. “Still good, though. I’d eat them all.”
Will laughs, grabbing a box and starting to pack the fruits of their labour. “Good, because you’re taking them home.”
Nate’s brows furrow. “You don’t like them?”
“Oh, I do, I just know how much you love cake. Here, I’ll take two in this little box. But the rest are yours, okay?”
“Thanks. And thanks for booking this, I really enjoyed it.” Nate gazes up at him, a small smile playing on his lips.
“You’re very welcome.”
Another moment ripe with potential intimacy slips away.
Outside, the sky is plum dark, early winter claiming the day and turning it to twilight. Will is grateful for gloves and coat, keeping him warm in the cool air and protecting him from exerting any undue influence.
“Will. Can I hug you? Say no if you want.”
We’re both wearing coats and gloves. And he’s wearing a beanie. Even if I could influence him, there’s no skin-to-skin contact, so…
“It’s okay.” Nathan’s voice interrupts his thoughts. “Didn’t mean to push you, I just hoped maybe it’d be safe, with what we’re wearing and all. I’m sorry.”
His disappointment is well masked, but it cuts deep regardless.
Fuck it.
Will takes the bag of cake from Nathan’s hand and places it gently to one side. He grins, evidently reading Will’s decision in the gesture, stepping in at the first possible second.
Will’s arms wrap around his back, holding him carefully close.
He feels so good in his arms, warm and solid and vital, their first proper embrace since the bench all those years ago.
The sweetness of it is tempered by the slightest trace of bitterness, regret for the years lost before and the weeks lost since.
My Nate.
The smell of his shampoo tickles Will’s nose, synthetic citrus which almost entirely masks the scent of his skin.
It would be so easy to lean back, tip his face up, and kiss him. And Will knows where it would lead, given the tension between them, and fuck he wants it. Wants Nate, with a passion he’s felt only once before. But could he trust that Nate’s reaction would be his own, unadulterated by Will’s desire?
He lets his arms loosen and drop away. Nate follows, a beat behind, a sigh that’s half happiness and half yearning slipping from his lips as he steps back.
“Can’t wait to do that again.” Nate stoops, picking up the bag and swinging it gently back and forwards. A cheeky grin takes over his face. “Maybe someday with no clothes on, when you’re ready.”
Will tosses him a wink. “Definitely someday.”
“No rush. Whenever you’re comfortable. So, uh, you want to get a drink or something? Or dinner, if you’re hungry?”
“I’m actually meeting Jon for dinner, but we could get a drink before?
Unless… would you like to join us? I’m sure he’d love to see you.
I mean, when I say that obviously I mean he’d love to tease us the entire evening, so…
” Will shrugs, uncertain whether bringing Jon and Nathan together this early is a good idea.
He tugs his sleeves down over his hands, burrowing into the warmth of his coat.
Nathan peers at him curiously. “You’re nervous?”
Surprise ripples through him. “What?”
He reaches out, gloved hand tugging Will’s sleeve back where it belongs. “You do this when you’re nervous or anxious or whatever. Always have.”
“Oh. Alright. I… didn’t realise. It’s fine. I just…” Nathan stands there, hand resting lightly on Will’s forearm, giving him space. “He’s never met any of my boyfriends before. And you’re, well, you, so he’s hardly gonna be on his best behaviour.”
“Makes sense.” Nathan slides his hand down to Will’s, squeezing it quickly before he lets go.
I’m so lucky to have him in my life again.
Will feels himself blushing, suddenly wanting nothing more than Nathan by his side for the rest of the evening. “I’d like you to come, though. If you want to. I’d… I’d really like you to come.”
Nathan gives him a dazzling smile, so broad his eyes are swallowed up by his cheeks. “I’d love to. Let’s go get that drink first, yeah? Lead the way.”