Chapter 50
Chapter fifty
Seren
The morning was soft and still. We woke slowly, drowsily, limbs tangled in the sheets and in each other.
Cheeks pressed to chests, and skin on skin on skin.
Warmth burrowed within me, so much deeper than the heat of the hearth licking across my flesh.
I felt it in my bones, in the steady thump of my overfilled heart.
Breakfast was a hurried affair, sliced fruits and fluffy eggs at the table with Harkin’s family. Yvett and Adina smiled pleasantly—knowingly—at us.
They assumed that Harkin and I were courting. I hoped after the night prior, Harkin had given up on his misguided notion that the council, or anyone else, had a say in who I chose to spend my life with.
“Thank you,” I told him. “For letting me meet your family. For coming back.”
“They loved you, Seren. You will always be welcome there. And, of course, I came back. I’ll always come back.”
I nodded, grateful for the reassurance. “In another life, we might have spent the rest of our days together in Villaz Silven. Breakfasts with your mother, and sparring with Adina…”
“Perhaps…” Harkin whispered. “But this is our life, Ren. We only get this one.”
“We don’t know that. After this is all over… Just, don’t give up on me. Not yet, okay?” The need to hold on to him, to make sure he knew I wanted to be selfish with him too, was so strong. It burst forth with every heartbeat.
“Alright,” Harkin agreed.
The forest path felt much shorter than it had the day before, and I could not help but feel as if it were safer, too, with Harkin by my side. The mischievous Tünécris and towering trees of the Váracis Erva were no match for the two of us together.
As the sun crested the clouded expanse of the sky, we rode upon the Acsillan palace. A flurry of activity assaulted us as we entered the palace gates. Our horses were promptly taken away, while Harkin and I were ushered to the royal quarters.
Ayla and Théo waited for us, the former pacing nervously across the plush carpet. She ran to my side, wrapping me in a hug the moment I stepped over the threshold.
“I cannot believe you slipped away without your guard!” Ayla scolded. “What if something had happened to you?”
I rolled my eyes good naturedly. My lips quirked in a smile.
“Yet nothing did.” Ayla frowned at my flippancy. I continued, “Apologies, Cousin, but there were matters I needed to see to in private. I didn't want to be observed, especially given we no longer know who we can trust.”
“Fine,” Ayla relented, looking between Harkin and I with a raised brow.
When neither of us deigned to elaborate, I gestured to the space around me. There were packs for each of us, near to bursting with supplies for our journey. Clothing and food and weapons were visible through their unsecured tops.
“We will have little time to accomplish our goals,” Théo began.
“We must arrive back at the palace before the solstice in just under a fortnight. The travel will take four days alone, eight including the return trip. Performing the ritual should not take more than a day, which will leave us three days to spare in case of any unforeseen circumstances.”
I blew out a breath. I knew the timeline would be tight, but the reality of it all was daunting. There was not just little room for error, there was practically none at all.
“Were you able to find more information on Claudian’s accomplice, Théo?” I feared asking the question, but it could not be avoided.
He dipped his head, a grave expression on his face. “I believe so. There was correspondence in a locked drawer of the prince's study. He had been writing to Lady Lydia Adiran. I… looked into her. There are rumors.”
“What rumors?”
“She is a life wielder—that much we knew—but there is talk of her wickedness. Of how she became so powerful. It seems you would not have been her first victim. If the whispers are to be believed, she has stolen the mágik and the life from another before: the life wielder who sat on the council before me.”
We blew out a collective breath. It was not the news we wanted to hear, but at least we would not go in blind.
“How did you come by this information?” Harkin questioned, rubbing a tired hand down his face.
“Safiya.”
“Ah. Yes, there are five packs.” Harkin observed, glancing at each of us for confirmation.
“I take it that means you convinced her?” I looked at Ayla whose face darkened, expression twisting in a scowl.
“I made Théo do it,” she admitted in a grumbling tone.
“I know why you want Safiya to accompany us. I understand the danger, and that there are very few people we can trust with our lives. But I cannot, will not, trust her with my heart again. This is a business transaction and nothing more. I want to hear nothing else on the matter.”
I raised my hands placatingly. “As you wish.”
A noise at the door drew our attention. Safiya stepped through the frame hesitantly, her eyes finding Ayla at once. I wondered how much she had heard. All of it, I gathered, from the sadness underscoring Safiya’s grim countenance.
“Ayla?” Safiya stepped closer. Her hand reached out then dropped back to her side. “Might you and I talk before we leave?”
“No.” Ayla’s answer was quick, decisive, but the flicker of her carefully painted expression betrayed her. She wanted to say yes. Was it for her sake or Safiya’s?
Safiya nodded, crestfallen.
“Now that we are all here, let us go over the plan.” Théo unrolled a series of the same map, one for each of us.
I took mine, noting the marked path through the upper reaches of the Váracis Erva.
“We will follow this route north through the forest. Just about here,” Théo pointed to a starred section of the map, “We will enter the mountains of the Sárkhona Draum. This is, by far, the most dangerous stretch in both landscape and potential for aggressive creatures. We will have to mind ourselves and each other carefully.”
“I know we are journeying to the Sárkhona Draum, but what exactly is the final destination?” I inquired, to which Harkin nodded his agreement.
“There is a shrine to the Drakány in the heart of the Sárkhona Draum. My parents told me stories of it when I was a boy. They came across it when they immigrated from Daikés. According to the research I have done, the shrine is a large statue in which the bulk of the remaining dragon mágik has been preserved. If we find the shrine, we will find your connection to the Goddesses.” Théo had a way of explaining things that made me feel at ease.
I knew that the days ahead would be far from easy, but his presence calmed me.
We had not informed the council of this plan. They would never have approved—if they even believed us. We planned to leave in broad daylight, to slip out as if we were simply off to the market for an afternoon of shopping. Sneaking out in the night would have been far more suspicious, we decided.
We exited the palace without a hitch, stealing away to the stables.
I moved toward Bear, but Harkin caught my hand, pulling me to Equinox with him. I pushed back the smile which threatened to break across my face.
Ayla claimed her mare, a distinguished paint, while Théo mounted Bear. Safiya chose a small horse, dappled gray.
Harkin took the pack from my shoulders, strapping it to Quin’s competent flank.
He held out a hand to help me mount before swinging on behind me.
His right hand twisted around the reins while his left settled in the dip of my waist. I leaned back so that I was flush with Harkin’s chest. His heavy exhales ghosted against my temple, rustling my hair.
I could not help but think of the night before, and I heated at the thought.
“Alright, lovebirds, if you’re going to share one horse, please spare us the show,” Ayla teased. She wrinkled her nose as if displeased, but I knew better.
Harkin flushed, his hand pulling back. I caught it with my own, placing it back on my hip. He squeezed gently in response.
The forest grew thicker as we ventured farther from the kingdom.
“Thank you for helping us, Théo. I know it cannot be easy to go against the council's wishes, despite your desire to help Ayla.” I nodded to him in appreciation.
“Once, it would have been difficult. I spent many years following orders I knew were wrong.” I recalled the dreams I’d had. Praying to the goddesses. His arrest. “Enough was enough. If I can do something to aid my friends—my people and the Ordelésans—I will do so.”
“After many years of only looking out for myself, I have come to the same conclusion,” I said with a bittersweet smile.
Théo returned it, and I knew he understood.
I told him that my dream mágik had allowed me to witness his confrontation with the king and his subsequent dismissal to the dungeon.
“I did not know who you were then, but I admired you all the same. Maybe the decision comes easy to you now, but it is still a loss to let go of the person you once were and all the time that went by while you hoped to make a better choice.”
He considered that, lips pressed firmly together as his eyes shone. “I know my actions now will not change the past, but I can only keep trying to do better. I will do better. It is nice to discuss this with someone who understands.”
I returned his grin. “Yes, it is.”
“And how do you move forward when you have done something unforgivable?” Safiya asked, her horse nudging closer to us as the trees grew tighter. “I fear there is no atoning for what I have done. Ayla will never forgive me.”
I mulled the words, stroking my thumb over Harkin’s hand. I knew forgiveness better than anyone—I had become its close friend these past months.
“She might not forgive you, that is true enough, but anything is possible. Is it not worth trying?” I prompted, turning to look at her.
Safiya had dark circles beneath her eyes. Her warm brown skin was duller than usual. I wondered if she had slept at all since that night in the ballroom.
When she did not respond, Théo stepped in.
“It is worth trying. Happiness is always worth trying for. And as to how you atone? Action, effort. That you are helping deliver Ayla and Seren to the Sárkhona Draum now is a step in the right direction. If all goes to plan, they will become the most powerful Rázuri of our lifetime. They will save our kingdom.”
Safiya nodded, only half convinced. She slowed her horse as she settled to the back of the group once more, leaving me to consider Théo’s words and the ritual that was to be done.
I understood that my power would be bolstered, but I had never considered that I would become one of the most powerful Rázuri alive. Once, I would have abhorred the thought. I would have been terrified by it. Now, with my family and friends beside me, I felt only calm.
I would use my power for good. We would defeat evil together, and I would lead Acsilla to an era of peace and prosperity. I would foster goodwill between Acsilla and Ordelés. We would not allow civil war to reign any longer.
Our horses carried us long into the night. The sun had fallen beneath the tree line hours past by the time we stopped to make camp.
My friends settled into their tasks easily.
Safiya pressed her hand flat against the earth.
It rumbled beneath our feet as the ground trembled, leveling itself.
Rocks rolled away from our camp, leaving the surface smooth and comfortable.
Ayla conjured a roaring fire in the center as Théo gathered wood to keep the flames lit through the night. I helped Harkin pitch our tents.
When we had traveled before, we slept beneath the stars, but it was far colder in the north—on the approach of the winter solstice—and we gathered around the fire to share a meal before heading to our respective tents.
“Seren, I have been thinking about your dream mágik. We will need some purpose, something to lure our villain in when we return on the solstice. Even more so, we will need a way to contact her so she knows where we will be. A trap of sorts,” Théo explained.
“I would suggest you begin honing your abilities so that you might contact her through your dreams. It will be safer for you and far more efficient.”
I nodded in agreement, looking at each of them. “I can do that. In all of the dreams I have had, I have been an unseen presence in your waking world, but I will continue to practice.”
“And for the distraction?” Théo asked.
I hummed contemplatively. “I’ll think of something.”
We broke for the night, Ayla, Théo, and Safiya going into their individual tents as Harkin and I walked hand in hand to the tent we were sharing.
I collapsed onto the blankets, pulling Harkin down with me. He leaned over me, pressing a slow kiss to my lips. I pushed my body against his, and he groaned.
“Ren.”
“We haven’t talked about last night—what it means.” I ghosted my breath along his throat. He swallowed hard.
“I still don’t see how this works,” he admitted, voice wavering.
“But you want it to?”
“Yes.” His voice was firm. Harkin tugged at my hair with his hands.
I kissed him deeply. “Do you want to be selfish with me?”
“Goddesses, yes,” Harkin growled, pulling me on top of him.
My thighs bracketed his hips, and I leaned over, settling my head on his chest. My arms wrapped around his neck as we held on to each other.
“I want that too,” I whispered, stroking his hair softly.
Harkin made a contented noise, already drifting to sleep beneath the warmth of my body. I waited for his breathing to even out before attempting to slip inside his mind.
I was met with only glaring, dimming silence.