Chapter 22 #4
His hands explored me with a care that only made the wanting worse, pausing whenever my body reacted and continuing when I pulled him closer. I learned which touches drew a shudder from him and found myself repeating them simply to feel it happen again.
Want gathered until every movement seemed to sharpen it.
This was more than the days I had spent pretending not to notice every brush of his hand or every moment his gaze lingered too long. I wanted him, but beneath that was something larger, something that had been building through every choice that had brought us here.
I placed my palm over his heart.
It hammered beneath the eight-point star.
“I choose you.”
Xandros went still. His eyes searched mine, and the hand at my waist slid slowly around my back until his palm rested flat against me.
He drew me closer.
His forehead came to mine, his mouth still close enough to brush mine when he spoke.
“I choose you, too, Wildflower.”
The words went through me so deeply that for one suspended moment, I could only hold him.
Then I kissed him.
Whatever had been building between us broke open. His mouth met mine with a hunger that matched my own, and my arms wound around his shoulders as he gathered me against him. The last space between our bodies disappeared beneath the water.
The thread between us came alive. Gold flared beneath his skin, answering beneath my palm and racing along the bond with enough force to make me gasp against his mouth.
I had chosen him first.
The bond followed.
After that, I lost track of where one touch ended and another began. We learned each other through mouths and hands, through broken breaths and the quiet sounds neither of us managed to swallow. His name kept slipping from me, and every time it did, his hold changed, drawing me nearer.
The water swirled around us. His constellations brightened beneath my hands. Wet hair tangled through my fingers while his mouth found mine again and again.
Every sensation sharpened until there was room for nothing else.
His hands holding me.
His mouth against my skin.
His lip between my teeth.
The tremor that moved through him when I pulled him closer, the thread burning bright between us, the feel of his arms around me, all of it blurred together.
I buried my face against the curve of his neck and held on as the wanting climbed beyond anything I could contain. A broken sound escaped me against his skin.
Xandros turned his face into my hair, and the sound he made sent another sharp shiver through me.
Then everything inside me gave way.
Light surged across his chest and shoulders, spilling gold beneath the water as the last overwhelming rush swept through me. I clung to him until it passed.
When the world steadied again, his arms stayed around my waist while the spring moved softly against us.
He shifted closer, tucking me against him until my cheek rested near his collarbone. The glow beneath his skin slowly dimmed.
His lips brushed my temple.
I closed my eyes.
The ache inside my chest returned, though now I knew what it was.
I loved him .
The realization moved through me with terrifying ease.
I loved this impossible male who had come through a wound in the world with a blade pointed at my heart. I loved the prince who had carried me through the rain, fed my Kindred vegetables he disliked, defied his king, and stood beside me while I demanded answers from my own people.
His hand rested loose against my back, leaving me room even now.
My eyes burned again. I lifted my face.
Silver stars glimmered in his eyes as they opened. The softness there made the words rise before I was ready for them.
I love you . They reached the back of my teeth but stayed there.
Xandros brushed a wet strand of hair from my cheek.
“What?”
I swallowed. “Nothing.”
His eyes narrowed with the same skepticism he had given me earlier but I kissed him before he could challenge me.
His mouth softened beneath mine.
The words remained locked inside me, frightening and entirely mine.
And for now, that was enough.
We washed properly afterward.
Eventually .
And then, I sat beside him on the submerged ledge, my legs draped over his while the spring carried the last traces of soap away. His arm wrapped around my back, fingers combing through my hair along the water’s surface. His constellations still glowed faintly beneath his skin.
I followed one of the golden lines across his chest.
Xandros caught my hand and pressed my palm flat over his heart.
“If the indigo ever reaches me, feel for this.”
Gold gathered beneath the star in my palm, warmer and deeper than the light moving through the rest of him. I felt the path of it beneath his skin, a living current feeding outward through every constellation.
My hand went still. “What am I feeling?”
“My Everlight.”
I looked down at our hands. The current remained beneath my palm, steady and unmistakable now that I knew where to find it.
His thumb moved once across my wrist. “If the indigo ever takes me while we’re holding a road, don’t let it take my Everlight with me.”
I lifted my eyes to his. “What am I supposed to do?”
“Take whatever Everlight is uncorrupted, and use it to close the road.”
My hand shifted beneath his. The next road no longer felt very far away.
“Without you?”
“If it comes to that.”
My stomach turned. I stared at him. “And what happens to you?”
His gaze held mine.
I knew before he answered.
“If you find yourself needing to do it, Wildflower, that question has probably already been answered.”
I looked back at our joined hands, his Everlight still aglow against the star in my palm. A little while ago, I had been imagining what it might mean to choose him. Now he was asking me to remember how his life felt beneath my hand so I could take what remained of it if everything went wrong.
I swallowed the lump forming in my throat. “You’re giving me an enormous amount of faith.”
His thumb brushed over my knuckles.
“I’m telling you because I trust you to finish what we started if I can’t.”
Every part of me rebelled at the thought. I hated the certainty in his voice almost as much as I hated how much trust lived inside the words.
I leaned into him and pressed my mouth to his before he could say anything else. His arm settled around my waist, drawing me closer as the glow beneath my palm slowly dimmed.
I stayed against him until only the steady beat of his heart remained beneath my hand.
Eventually, we dressed and headed back down the hill.
Xandros took my hand, and I threaded my fingers through his.
We walked slowly.
The Grove spread ahead of us through the trees, alive with voices and birdsong and the distant rhythm of people working. Beneath my boots, the Mother Tree’s roots carried the Wild in deep, steady pulses.
I pictured the silverwoods as he had described them, their tall trees shining beneath a sky crowded with stars.
I pictured Rhian strong enough to leave the infirmary.
Torren finding some life beyond the Wild he had lost.
Bramble terrorizing Asterran birds.
Xandros beside me on the porch of my family home, listening to summer rain drum against the roof.
For once, there was something beyond the next road and whatever fight waited after it.
I tightened my fingers around his and let myself keep that future a little longer.