23. Rowan
ROWAN
“Where are we going?” I ask as Harley motions for me to follow him.
“Well, while you and Samson were groping each other, Neo messaged me. Apparently he’s been experimenting with the supernatural and wants us to come try some witchy concoction he made. It’s an old-time tradition, he says.”
“Has he done this tradition before?”
“Not as far as I know,” Harley says cheerfully, leading me out into the backyard. “God knows what he’s put in it.”
“Jesus,” I murmur, then laugh. “That sounds dangerous. Are we going to die?”
“Chances are high that we will, but it’ll be fun. Just don’t tell Jules. He won’t be happy with Neo using his strawberries.”
“Oh, are they special?”
“They are. They are grown at a local farm, but the brew required something red and rare, and Neo insisted. I did offer my AB negative blood…”
I shudder. “Oh god. I’m not drinking your blood no matter how rare it is.”
“That’s what Neo said. But there’s nothing wrong with my blood. A lot of people want it, just so you know.”
“I’m sure it’s lovely and very helpful, but I’d rather not consume it. I’m not a vampire.”
He chuckles and squeezes me tightly, jostling me slightly. “Yeah, fair enough.”
We turn slightly and make our way toward the gazebo in the backyard. I rub my eyes in disbelief, but Ansel and Neo really do have a large pot boiling over a fire. It’s very much like witches tending their cauldrons. Only more domestic and more twenty-first century.
When I approach, I realize it’s not actually a wood-burning fire, but a pot set on top of a gas burner, the kind you would use for fondue. But I guess it works.
“You made it,” Neo says, stirring his spoon around, his eyes flicking to mine. “Amazing. We needed four people, and I do not want to hear Wylder bitch about this.”
I’m oddly touched that they thought of me. “Thank you for inviting me.”
“No problem. I figured you’d be bored and would want to be involved. You seem fun.” His eyes flick up and down me, and he shrugs. “Mostly.”
“I am fun. Mostly.”
He grins at me as Ansel comes over and pulls me into a hug.
“Glad you’re here. Welcome to the family.”
I mean, it’s a little too soon for that, if ever, but I can’t bring myself to point that out. “Aren’t witchy things supposed to be done under the moonlight?”
“Fuck the moon,” Neo grunts and then lifts the spoon and holds it out to Ansel. “I don’t need the moon for this shit. This is…whimsy and ferality. When you’re with a rich fucker like Wylder, you find yourself with random hobbies and realize you can do whatever you’d like…whenever you’d like.”
“Like witchcraft?”
“Yeah, like witchcraft. Even got a book. Ansel bought it for me at the thrift shop.” He holds a worn book with crumbling pages and a torn spine out to me. “Found a potion in here, looked fun.”
“What’s it for?” I ask, leafing through the pages as Harley leans over my shoulder to look.
Neo taps on the instructions, and I let out a small laugh. “A potion for bigger dicks?”
“Yeah. Well, they don’t call them dicks, do they? They call them…scepters. But I could read between the lines.”
“Hmm.” I eye the bubbling liquid in the copper pot dubiously. “Is that safe?”
“If you get a bigger dick, does it matter?”
I glance down at my crotch and then back at Neo. I’ve never really thought much about my dick, to be honest. I’m a bottom and don’t really need my cock to be substantial. Most men don’t care as long as my hole is ready and willing.
Harley scratches his head. “In all honesty, I don’t want mine bigger. It already puts some guys off.”
Ansel sighs dreamily. “Must be the Buckingham genes.”
“Definitely true with Wylder.” Neo nods solemnly before turning to me. “What about Samson?”
“Oh,” I say, flustered. “I’m not sure he’d want me to—”
“That’s a yes,” Neo says. “Anyway, listen, we all want bigger dicks. Or bigger balls or bigger something. That’s not specified in the recipe, but listen, it will work. We’re using the Bardlebabble berries. It has to be successful.”
“Oh, yes, the berries.”
He rolls his eyes and holds a strawberry out toward me. “Not just any berry. Try it, and then you’ll understand. Apparently they’re rare. Just—”
“Don’t tell Jules,” Harley finishes for him.
I put the strawberry between my lips, and my eyes widen. “Oh.”
“Yeah, oh. They’re super expensive and amazing, so this mixed with everything else… Big dicks. Bigger than anything anyone’s ever seen.”
Harley snorts and Ansel makes a face. “I don’t know if I want a big dick swinging between my legs. Sounds horrendous.”
Neo scoffs. “Shut up. Everyone wants at least two more inches. Just drink the damn juice.”
I glance at Harley, and he winks at me as Neo dishes some of the boiling red liquid into small crystal glasses. It looks far too hot and makes my stomach roil slightly at the thought of consuming it, but when he hands me a glass, I can’t say no.
I want them to like me. To keep liking me. I haven’t been part of a family like this in years. It makes me feel…
Wanted.
Neo bobs his head, his eyes dancing. “All right. Now we need to say the chant, and we need a dance to go with it. It will really seal the deal, or so it says here.”
He eyes me, and I feel my cheeks flushing. “Oh, well, yes. I can do that. I can totally dance.”
“Great. Now…to big dicks everywhere.” He takes the book back from Harley and shuffles to a page, tapping on it.
“All right. Listen to the chant. Embody it. And then, Rowan, you move your body, and we’re golden.”
I don’t think we are, but I’m too amused to say otherwise.
Neo lifts his glass, and we do the same, his voice carrying. “By rod and rising tide, let my wand be glorified…”
I snort, and so does Harley as the chant goes on and on, and by the end, I find myself swaying, the sun setting in the sky really setting the mood.
I never thought I’d be into this, but for some reason, on this estate with these friends, I am.
It’s too ridiculous not to be. Maybe Neo’s right.
Maybe when you have a rich boyfriend you find yourself with weird hobbies.
Not that Samson’s my boyfriend. This is just a…
Well, I don’t know what it is.
Just that I’m not ready for it to end.
Neo claps his hands together suddenly. “All right. Now that we’ve said the magic words, do a dance and then we’ll drink.”
I set my glass down and channel whatever witchy thing I can, my body swaying this way and that, before I finally finish with a flourish that’s not needed.
Ansel and Neo clap, Harley whistling as we pick up our glasses, clinking them together.
Then we stare down into them, unsure if we should actually drink this.
“Don’t fucking think about it,” Neo murmurs, and then holds it up once more. “A great and mighty wand for thee!” he shouts and pours the glass back, swallowing it in one gulp. We do the same, the bitterness mixed with the heated strawberries hitting my mouth with a force I didn’t know was possible.
I sputter and gasp, Harley making a noise in the back of his throat as he gags. Neo is the only one who is smacking his lips.
“Not bad,” he says. “I believe we have an unmitigated success.”
“Fuck that! It was terrible. What the hell?” Harley grumbles, swiping at his mouth.
Ansel shakes his head. “Friend, it was pretty bad. Like, really bad. I think it was the sage.”
Neo rolls his eyes. “Whatever. It will work. I know it.”
I just set my glass down, feeling my stomach churn. The drink was not good, not at all, but I won’t ruin his ritual. We all need something to hang on to, and if a bigger dick is Neo’s thing, then so be it.
“I think the concoction has an appeal,” Neo says. “And…” He pulls the waistband of his pants out and stares at his cock within. “And…I’m sure it will work eventually. It just needs time. I believe two inches is the max.”
“Yeah, I’m sure it will work…eventually…” Ansel says, ever the good friend.
I have no such confidence, but I sit there while the three of them chat, Harley prodding me to chime in. After a while, he doesn’t need to do even that.
I’m just…joining in. Having fun. Guilt-free, shame-free fun.
The meeting between the Buckinghams and Larry has been long forgotten. My dick doesn’t feel any bigger, but I do feel slightly tipsy. Neo presses another glass into each of our hands. The second shot goes down much easier. As does the third.
And the fourth.
By the time Samson appears, what feels like hours later, I’m in a bit of a state.
There’s barely any of the bubbling liquid remaining. We resorted to scraping the edges with a ladle to get the last of it out. The taste really does grow on you.
Those Badleboobily berries were great and well worth it.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Samson grumbles. But I see his lips twitch, the gentle amusement in his eyes.
I think Samson likes seeing me relax with his family.
I’m certainly relaxed. Perhaps too relaxed.
“Getting bigger dicks,” I respond, punctuating my sentence with a small hiccup.
Samson lifts me up and into his arms, murmuring curse words at Harley as he goes. “Shouldn’t have trusted you with him, you fucker.”
Neo takes offense at that. “Hey, he’s not a fucker. He’s…just misunderstood.”
Harley bobs his head, a grin on his lips. “Totally misunderstood.”
I hiccup again, and Samson grumbles, hitching me up higher. “We’re going to get you back to the house and into bed before you pass out.”
“I won’t pass out,” I say, leaning my head against his shoulder, reaching up to touch the stubble on his jaw. “I never pass out.”
“Yeah, well, Neo’s a menace. I don’t know what he put in there, but I can smell it from the house. Must be moonshine.”
Oh. Well, that makes sense, then. It was very strong, and I did drink quite a lot.
“Plus, Jules isn’t going to be happy about the strawberries. He’s coming over tomorrow and—”
“Shh!” I place my finger over his mouth, feeling the way it moves against my skin. “Don’t tell him. It’s our secret.”
Samson scowls, and I grin. God, he’s so fucking cute, even when he’s being all grumpy.
Yanking on his neck until his lips meet mine, I kiss him slowly, a flick of my tongue against his.
I hear his soft moan, and I can’t help but reciprocate, my cock perking up between my legs. I palm it, arching up slightly.
“Don’t even think about it,” Samson grouches. “You’re fucking drunk. You’re going to have to wait.”
“But my dick should be bigger. Don’t you want to see? Don’t you want a feel?” I whine.
Samson glowers down at me. “Tomorrow. But right now, you’re going to take a bath, drink some water, and go to bed.”
“That’s no fun.”
“I’m the antithesis of fun. Suck it up, buttercup.”
I pout all the way back to his room.