Chapter 15
CHAPTER 15
MARCH
C lementine was still horny baking.
This time she was in complete control of the baking. Well, sort of. There weren’t a million vagina cupcakes spread out over her kitchen counter, however there were a million different pastries everywhere. While nothing happened beyond the kissing, touching and flirting at her house, whenever Oakley swung by for his box of donuts, she’d feel a flutter in her tummy. He’d flash her a smile and look her up and down with those gorgeous green eyes like he was thinking of all the things he wanted to do to her. It took serious effort not to react when he did that. It was distracting, but also incredibly flattering.
In the days since he’d stayed over, she made donuts for Wildes Haven, sorted out the list of tasters they needed to prepare for the week, and even the wedding cakes she’d prepared turned out perfectly.
Then everything collapsed.
It started with burned cookies, followed by flat cakes and finally bitter coffee. All because Xander had the audacity to show up with his wife . Clementine had been sitting in front for a change of scenery, bent over her notebook and scribbling ideas for a tasting the following week. He’d said her name and when their eyes locked, her heart dropped. Apparently she hadn’t forgiven him like she thought, because instead of responding to him, she gathered her things and hid in her office. She surfaced hours later and in an attempt to distract herself made another mess.
Freya and Roscoe, tired of her kitchen mishaps, shut her in her office. After much pacing and grumbling she dropped into her chair and fiddled with her phone until the FaceTime ringing filled her office.
“It’s my favorite daughter!” her father greeted her as the call connected. His handsome face filled the screen of her phone and Clementine rolled her eyes. “You look particularly perturbed, kid.”
She huffed. “I’ve been punished.”
“Is this a kink thing? I can’t keep up.”
“What the fuck, Dad?”
Her father grinned and looked away from the phone as he said, “Renu, your daughter is involved in kinky stuff.”
“Dad!”
Her mother’s face filled the screen, her frown matching the one Clementine wore. “Are you being safe?”
“Christ. It’s not a kink thing!” she shouted and her parents looked unconvinced. She growled and forced herself to calm down. “I burned cookies and ruined a batch of cakes today. So Freya punished me by locking me in my office.”
Outside of the widening of their eyes, she would have assumed the call had dropped. They stared at her for a long time before glancing at each other. Then her mother leaned forward slightly and said, “What’s wrong, sweetheart?”
Sighing, she shrugged. They didn’t know about Xander, nobody did. She knew what everyone would say if she said she had a crush , so Clementine kept it to herself. Maybe talking about it back then might have been a good idea, just to have someone to help untangle the mess in her head.
Instead, she said, “Just distracted and messed up. That’s all.”
“We’ve known you your whole life, Tiny. There’s more.”
Her parents stared at her in concern, foreheads wrinkled as they waited for her to explain.
“Nothing else. Got tons of weddings and lots on my mind with that.”
Her mother was still unconvinced, but she said, “Been there, done that. Remember that one year we decided to host a big family reunion in our backyard?” She and her father nodded, wincing at the memory of the craziest idea her mother ever had. “What none of you knew was that I had burned two pots of rice that morning. I cried and called your aunt, the rice we served was hers.”
“Seriously?” Clementine asked, eyes wide as she stared at her mother.
“I was so stressed. There was so much to do and I kept trying to do it all by myself.” Her mother shrugged. “Point is, you’ve got this incredible group of people working with you. Delegate and allow yourself to be distracted. Don’t push yourself when you’re not focused. Nothing good comes of it.”
“This is why I married your mother,” her father offered with a lovestruck look in his eyes. Her mother nudged him, but Clementine saw the smile playing at the corner of her lips. “That and so much more.”
“Ugh, why?” She groaned and her parents cracked up. “You’re the worst.”
“When you meet the love of your life, my precious little girl, you’ll know,” her mother offered unhelpfully and then kissed her father on the cheek.
“That sounds like so much work.” She had to admit that seeing her parents happy together was the best thing in the world.
“We love you, Tiny.” Her father peered at her through the screen and she smiled.
“Love you too.”
“Take a break once in a while, my love,” her mother added before they said their goodbyes and hung up.
Letting this thing with Xander become a reason for messing up was silly. He wasn’t important and shouldn’t have any impact on her life now. After all, she had someone better. Someone who liked her and cared about her. Oakley might have shared a few things with her old crush, or she thought he did at the beginning, but they were so different. He uplifted her, wanted her to find pleasure in everything and kissed her like his life depended on it. He’d been through so much in his life and was still the happiest person she’d ever met. He was one of the best things to happen to her in a long time.
No more Xander. Just Oakley.
Clementine had been punished for two hours, leaving her staff to handle the cake tasting. She could have been upset about it, but she was lying on her stomach on her office floor, looking for inspiration in old copies of Good Housekeeping . Her door opened and she looked up to find Ginny stepping inside.
“What’s going on with you?”
“Needed a break,” Clementine said and sat up, leaning against her desk. “How did the tasting go?”
“It went fine. I missed you.”
“Aw.” But there was zero emotion behind it. Not that she wasn’t touched by the sentiment, she knew that Ginny was digging. “Stop looking at me like that.”
“You’ve never missed a tasting. Even when you’re sick you show up.”
“I was told to delegate.” She pushed to her feet after much grunting and groaning, bones and muscles protesting at the position change. Straightening her clothes, she gathered everything off the floor and moved to her desk. The whole time, she could feel Ginny watching her, but pretended to be busy.
With a dramatic groan, Ginny said, “Jeez , fine . The couple first said they wanted something with fruit, but ended up settling on a vanilla cake.”
Clementine snorted. “Freya and I decided to toss that in there to piss Roscoe off, he’s probably not pleased about this development.”
“I’ve never actually seen smoke come out of a real person’s ears before, but he looked like he was going to explode,” Ginny said, collapsing onto the couch against the wall.
“Why did they pick that one?”
“Something about simplicity.”
“I’ll refrain from adding it to the list next time.”
Ginny clapped her hands. “Great, now…talk to me.”
“There’s nothing to talk about. I seriously have things on my mind, that’s all.”
“It’s a person. And they’ve gotten your pastel coat in a twist.”
“Yes.” What was the point of ignoring the obvious? “I don’t need advice, I’m working through it.”
“Had no plans to give you advice. Is it the hot muscular dude with the little kid?”
She gagged and Ginny snorted.“Ugh, no. That’s Mack. My best friend .”
“I’d totally understand getting things in a twist because of him.”
“Because of who?” a gruff voice that belonged to said hot muscular dude came through her ajar office door. Mack stepped into the room and smiled at Ginny. “Hi, there.”
“Don’t flirt with my friends,” Clementine warned him, but he kept his bright smile fixed on the brunette.
“We were just talking about you.” the wedding planner said, totally unaffected by his sparkling charm.
Mack laughed, making Clementine roll her eyes. Of course he was flirting with the pretty woman and shamelessly at that. “Happily single, in case anyone was wondering.”
“Wouldn’t know from the obvious way you turned that charm up at the sight of me,” Ginny deadpanned.
“What can I say? I see a beautiful woman and the switch flips automatically.”
Clementine groaned and got to her feet, shooting Mack a glare. “Okay, turn that switch off. Thanks for coming to check on me,” she told Ginny who winked.
“Whatever’s going on with you and your person , I hope you figure it out.”
With that, Ginny walked out and Clementine found her best friend watching the woman before turning to look at her.
“What is going on with you?”
The urge to throw a tantrum was high, but she knew that Mack would take it. He wouldn’t back down because she was having a bad day. In fact, he would wait it out and then ask again.
“I didn’t fuck him. I panicked and he was so fucking nice about it. He spent the night and we talked. I really didn’t want any of these feelings. It’s fucking with my head. It’s been days and I’m still thinking about him. But also like…freaking out because what if this is just temporary and it’s like Xa—like a figment of my imagination,” she quickly corrected and sucked in a sharp breath. Clementine remembered belatedly that Mack knew about Xander. “I kept messing up, so they locked me away.”
She collapsed into her chair, chest heaving. Mack came around the desk and kneeled in front of her, hands cupping her face so she would look at him.
“I’m sorry I made you do this,” he said after a long moment.
“You didn’t do anything. I’ll be fine.”
“Maybe you don’t need to be fine. It’s normal for someone to take up all the thinking space in your head. Instead of fighting it, go with the flow?”
What if I’m trying to banish one and hold onto the other?
She nodded slowly and forced herself to breathe through it. Oakley already took up so much room in her head. This wouldn’t be any different. Right now, she was leaving everything in his hands. While he wouldn’t take advantage of that, she wanted some control over the situation. Or at least the illusion of control.
“Are you going to be okay?”
“Eventually.” She sighed and gestured to the box filled with bottles in the corner. “That’s for you.”
“You’re getting rid of your alcohol?”
Nodding, she dragged her fingers through her hair. “He’s…uh, Oakley is in recovery. Figured I should probably get rid of all that stuff from my house.”
Mack looked like he wanted to say something, but chose to pick up the box instead. “Come by for dinner tonight. Dig’s got something they want to show you.”
She smiled, a genuine one this time. Because an evening with Mack and Indigo would heal her completely.
The next day, after the most relaxing dinner with the MacArthur duo—Indigo made an installation inspired by Clementine and her business for a school project—she was feeling much better. She even woke up on the right side of the bed and got into work early. She made fresh batches of donuts, cookies and breakfast pastries before sitting down to knock out some cake recipes. Her inbox was flooded with requests for her to do wedding cakes, so she referred them to Wildes Events + Weddings, because that was the only way she was taking on work right now.
By the time her staff started trickling in, she had a bunch of new ideas for them to try out. She wrote them on the whiteboard and then turned to face them with an awkward smile. “I want to apologize for how I’ve been the last few days. There’s been a lot on my mind and I know that I should have said something before. I just…”
“It’s okay, chef, we get it. Some days are good mental health days and others aren’t. But you’re doing okay?” Freya asked.
She nodded, looking at each of them. “Yeah. I’m okay. And in case it wasn’t obvious yet, if any of you have days like that, please let me know. Despite my need to push through and work so I can screw everything up, that’s not what we should be doing.”
“You got it, boss,” Roscoe told her, shooting finger guns before he turned his attention to the white board. All of them smiled and settled in for the day. Once she’d answered questions about the day’s schedule, everybody put on their aprons and got started on the cakes. While her team might have been worried about her, they also worked their asses off to keep the place running and for that she was incredibly appreciative.
Standing in the doorway of her office, she fidgeted with her phone. This fling with Oakley was going in the right direction and at a suitable pace. However, her feelings were all over the place and she needed to contain them somehow. Take back some of that control she thought she had. Chewing on her lip, she opened up their text chain and sent him a message.
Clementine
I’ll bring the donuts to you today.
Oakley
Good morning to you too, sugarplum.
Clementine
Nope.
Oakley
Jellybean?
Clementine
Disgusting.
Oakley
Cherry Bomb?
Clementine
What.
Oakley
Dumpling seems like a winner.
Maybe Babycakes.
Clementine
I’ll see you at the shop.
Oakley
Okay, Babycakes.
Rolling her eyes, she fought back a smile and grabbed the box of donuts on her way out. When she pulled up in front of the tattoo shop, he was already waiting for her. Dressed in dark jeans and a chambray shirt with the sleeves folded up to reveal his forearms, he was a distracting sight. She’d barely put the truck into park when her door swung open.
“Babycakes.”
“ Oakley ,” she drawled, handing him the box.
“Can we make this our daily routine? My days would be better if they started with you.”
“Only if you look this good every time,” she told him with a smirk.
He matched her smile and she sighed, resisting the urge to roll her eyes. Oakley pushed the door to the shop open and with a dull lamp as their guide, he reached for her hand and led them into a room where he flipped on the lights. Her heart flipped at the warmth of his palm against hers, instantly missing it when the contact broke so she could set her things down.
Oakley opened the box of donuts with a giddy smile. “What did I do to get this early morning visit?”
“An addendum to our—” she gestured vaguely between the two of them with a shrug “—deal, arrangement, whatever.”
“Do people really say addendum?”
“Focus, Oakley,” she grumbled, watching him try to choose a donut. She closed the box with a loud huff and it drew his attention to her instantly.
“I’m listening, baby, I promise.”
She couldn’t even find it in her to get angry about the stupid term, because he looked genuinely shocked at her reaction.
She paced and talked with her hands. “Friends with benefits is my suggestion. I thought that we could do this without strings, but clearly that was foolish of me. Our strings are all tangled up and I like that. I know you do too.”
“Like being tangled up with you? Fuck yeah, I do.”
“Right, so all of the strings in this friendship with benefits.”
He tilted his head with a smile. “Are we friends, Clem?”
“Obviously.”
“Figured as much, just wanted to double check.” She rolled her eyes and heard him chuckle. “May I hold you?”
With a gentle nod, she stopped moving. He dragged his hands up her arms, then around her waist to pull her closer. For a moment, she couldn’t think. Or breathe. All she could focus on was him .
“You’re shaking,” he said softly.
She hummed and set her hands on his chest. “We need rules.”
“What kind of rules?”
“I know we’ve both got our issues with sex, but still I feel like it needs to be clear that there can’t be anyone else.”
“Okay.”
She swallowed and continued. “I’m not ready for people to know, so we’d spend our time at my house. No dating, but I’ll still be your food guide.”
“Okay,” he repeated, a wrinkle forming between his eyebrows.
“We’re exploring pleasure and helping each other. But we’re not putting labels on this, we’re not making any promises outside of that.”
“Clem…”
She could hear the confusion in that one word. “I need to feel some kind of control, Oakley.” Don’t break, don’t break.
His eyes searched hers before nodding slowly. “Okay, baby. Can I still kiss you?”
“You must always kiss me.”
He nodded, his hands moving up her back. One cupped her neck while the other traced the front of her blouse. “Anything else, Clem?”
“We’re going to take it slow.”
His finger dipped into her cleavage and their eyes met, sending a spark of lust up her spine. She was panting, but didn’t want him to stop.
“Keep going,” he mumbled.
“Kissing, touching, teaching, fucking ,” she breathed out, another shiver running through her.
His warm breath brushed against her cheek as he leaned in, the hand around her neck moved into her hair. She licked her lips, eyes falling shut and leaned into his touch. Her hands settled on his hips, fingers curling into the loops of his jeans. She felt him press a featherlight kiss to her cheek and arched into him, turning her head in the hopes of kissing him. Oakley suddenly seemed so far away, but as she was ready to give up, his mouth pressed against hers and she released a moan of relief. It was a soft kiss, one that sent explosions of pleasure all through her body. A slight parting of lips, a brief touching of tongues and all of her came alive.
“Tonight,” he mumbled against her mouth. “Let’s start tonight.”