Chapter 9
Chapter nine
James
The atmosphere on campus was different the next day. More somber, quiet. As if everyone was waiting for shoe to drop, or for something new and different to happen.
There had been no more reporting on the attack from the Alpha after the initial news burst, though James suspected that whoever had leaked the information in the first place had been on the receiving end of a swift pink slip.
It was how these things went, especially when it came to topics as touchy as Alpha and Omega relations.
His instincts didn't like the quiet. The hairs on the back of his neck were constantly prickled as if he were being watched, and he found himself glancing over his shoulder more often than he wanted.
He resorted back to his learned habits of checking exits, of cataloguing faces, of mentally listing potential dangers every time he walked into a room.
He hated it. He hated the fact that Camelia wasn't with him even more, but he knew that now, more than ever, the facade of normalcy was of the utmost importance.
A fact that was only emphasized by his father's call.
It came when he was on a break between morning and afternoon classes. Usually James took the time to get some food, but since adjusting their schedules – and lives – to accommodate Camelia, James ate a little later with her when she wanted food after classes were done for the day.
James stared down at his phone, wincing at it buzzed in his hand. The readout of his father's name was a glaring stab of guilt every time it vibrated. Ordinarily, James would have answered the phone by now but...
He pressed the 'ignore' button, and his stomach swooped out from underneath him as he tucked the device back in his pocket.
He could just imagine the outraged expression on his father's face as his call was sent to voicemail, and James smiled a little to himself even as he knew there would be a horrible message for him to endure later.
"What are you smiling for?" Evan's voice was quiet but happy, the man himself falling into step next to James as he headed towards the quad.
"What are you doing? You have a class." James couldn't stop himself from reaching out and brushing their hands together, just for a second; since Camelia had come back to the house, the time that the two of them had spent together alone had suddenly become very limited.
It wasn't bad; Camelia was the missing piece between the two of them to make their little trio whole, James knew it as surely as he knew that the sky was blue.
It was just an adjustment, and he couldn't lie to himself and say that he didn't miss Evan, a little bit.
Evan's fingers tangled with his for just a second before he let go, and he flashed a smile at James as the two of them picked a table in the corner of the room to sprawl at. "Playing hooky. What about you?"
James rolled his eyes, a smile tugging at his mouth. "I don't have class."
Evan nodded, one of his feet pushing across the space to touch James'. The touch was comforting, as if Evan was missing James as much as James was him, and it settled something in James' stomach. He put his phone face-down on the table, nodding at it as he said, "I just ignored a call from my dad."
Evan quirked an eyebrow at him. "Just didn't feel like talking to Daddy Dearest?"
James chuckled again, though the sound was a little strained this time.
"Kind of." He paused for a second, chewing the inside of his cheek.
The words that bubbled to the front of his mouth weren't ones that he had expected to say, but they spilled out nonetheless.
"Ev. The...offer. Of helping me finish school.
Financially." He winced a little, hating himself for needing to ask this.
Knowing that Evan wouldn't judge him didn't cure the crippling shame inside of him. "Is that still on the table?"
Evan reached out and took James' hand in his tightly, heedless of anyone who might be watching.
"Of fucking course it is," he said firmly. If he was surprised by the sudden ask, he didn’t show it in his tone or his expression.
His blue eyes burned into James' when he looked up, helping to make the twist of shame in James' stomach a little less overwhelming. "Have you changed your mind?"
James squirmed a little, clutching to Evan's hand tightly as if were the only thing anchoring him.
"I...I don't know," he finally admitted, his voice quiet.
He stared at the table, unable to meet Evan's gaze as he spoke the next words.
"It's...Camelia. I know my Dad doesn't like even the idea of her, and.
.." He let out a shaky breath, feeling intensely vulnerable and fucking hating it.
"I don't want to give her up, Ev. I can't. And if I have to make a choice. .."
Evan squeezed James' hand, lifting it up and pressing a firm kiss to James' knuckles.
The movement surprised James, who couldn't stop himself from whipping his head around and making sure that nobody was watching.
Not because he was worried about any of their fellow classmates being homophobic; that was the never the problem.
It was his dad. Always his fucking dad, and the eyes and ears that he might have watching James at all times.
And, if James was being perfectly honest with himself, that was another factor that had prompted this long-overdue conversation with Evan.
He was exhausted. Exhausted by the constant fear and constantly being on edge, constantly worried about what he did and said and thought, just in case there was a minute possibility that it might get back to his father.
He didn't want to live that way anymore. He wanted to live his life, the way he wanted to. With the two people who...he was coming to need as much as he needed food to eat and somewhere to sleep.
"You won't have to," Evan finally said softly, interrupting James' internal revelations.
He squeezed James' hand again before releasing it.
James barely had time to be sad at the sudden lack of contact before Evan pulled his phone out of his jacket pocket, dialing a number and putting it on speaker phone as it rang.
"Who..." James hissed, glancing around again.
The person on the other line picked up before Evan could respond. "Evan, darling! So nice to hear from you!"
The sound of Adriana's voice made James relax a little, though he still glanced side to side to make sure that they weren't being listened in on.
"Hey, mom," Evan said easily. He pushed his foot more firmly against James', as if warning him not to flee, and James couldn't stop himself from narrowing his eyes a little as he folded his arms across his chest. "You have a minute to talk? I had a question for you."
"Of course! I always have time for my children, darling. How are things? How is James? You still need to bring that new roommate of yours around to meet us, sweetie, it's almost like you've been hiding her..."
"Mom," Evan interrupted gently. Her words cut off with a little giggle, and Evan continued, looking at James as he said, "You remember the discussion we were having the last time I was over, about the trust for James?"
"Of course," Adriana said promptly. James reared back a little in surprise, the words news to him. They...had talked about this? About him?
All this time...all these years, James had thought that Evan's offer was an independent reach.
Something he did because he pitied James and his shitty relationship with his father.
It was one of the many reasons that James had declined him so many times; he didn't want to be a burden to any one person in that way.
"James asked me if the offer was still on the table. I told him yes, of course, but I thought that he would want to hear it from you." Evan prodded the phone towards James before he could protest or walk away, the feeling of being on the spot suddenly weighing heavy in his chest.
He didn't say anything, the phone sitting in his hand like a grenade for a second before Adriana prompted gently, "James, are you there sweetie?"
James cleared his throat, but his voice still cracked a little when he spoke. "Yeah, hi, Adriana. Sorry, I didn't know that Evan was going to call you when I brought this up." Shame made his face hot, and he wanted to flee, wanted to run.
"Do you need help, sweetheart?" Adriana's gentle voice made him feel, if possible, even worse, and James' throat swelled with the unwelcome beginnings of tears. He opened his mouth, but no words came out, and after a moment Evan took the phone back from him.
"Yeah, mom, he does," Evan said softly. "We can do it, right?"
Adriana didn't hesitate. "Get me his social and I'll have the trust set up within the hour. Anything we can do to help you, James. We love you."
The words made tears prick at the corner of James' eyes, and Evan nodded. "I'll take care of it, mom. Gotta go, I'll call you later, okay?"
"Okay, I love you too!"
Evan hung up on Adriana before James could manage any words to express the warring gratitude and grief in his chest. The easy acceptance that Adriana had offered, no hesitation in the face of him needing help in such a fundamental, humiliating way...
"How do I repay this?" he finally whispered, his voice choked.
Evan shook his head, reaching out and linking their fingers together again in a steadying hold. "There's nothing to repay," he said. His voice was quiet but steady, after a moment, James nodded a slow, shaky nod.
"Okay."