18. Avery
18
AVERY
Caden’s admission remains fresh in my head. I’ve turned it over a hundred times at least between last night and this morning.
I believe it’s just the bond making him act like he needs to be around me, maybe even giving him mate-vision so it can entice us to complete the connection. It has to be the reason it no longer so much as twinges to cause me any pain, because it senses a chance to mend what the rejection broke.
Why else would he be compelled to sit outside my window every night in his fur or chop enough wood at dawn to fill my woodshed this morning?
Even if he no longer hates me, I have no idea where that leaves us. His apology in the woods doesn’t mean he’s changed his mind about us being mates because he didn’t kiss me in the clearing, or make any other move to claim me as his mate. Scenting me out of the sense of possessiveness his wolf has towards me doesn’t make me his.
Do I want to be his? My pulse staggers.
The kitchen grinds to a halt when I enter for breakfast. I freeze in the doorway, then duck my head and find something to do.
“Back to work. Food doesn’t prepare itself,” Alma barks after a long pause.
Taryn slings an arm over my shoulder and is completely obvious when she sniffs me. “You smell like?—”
“I know.” I bite my lip, cracking eggs harder than necessary and fish shells from the bowl.
“After Liam dragged me off last night, I thought you’d be right behind me to be my bunk buddy for yet another night in the holding rooms.”
“So did I.” I shoot her a wry smile. “Have you considered moving your things into the patrol cabin? You might as well for how often you end up there.”
She waves a hand and scoffs. “I think Liam just gets off on seeing me locked up. He has such a power trip whenever he decides I’m doing something I shouldn’t be.”
“Thanks for helping me even though we got caught.”
“Anytime.”
I keep myself occupied, volunteering first for every task Alma orders. It backfires when she decides to call on me to send out toast.
“Oh, but—Taryn could do that. I’m watching the bacon,” I say.
She shoves the tray of baskets in my hands and nods to the door. “Go on. It was a special request from Alpha Blackburn that you be the only one to serve his food. He’ll touch nothing anyone else brings him.”
Goosebumps race across my skin and heat floods my face at the look she gives me, like she believes I smell like him because I arched my back and presented for him. For unmated females, it’s usually the case.
While none of that’s happened between us, despite my bond-induced dreams supplying vivid ideas after last night, him only wanting to touch what I offer sparks excitement in my veins. I squash it before my wolf takes it as a sign to shift and seduce him into hunting with her.
At first, no one pays me any mind. Nina Blackburn’s on her way in behind her mate with her baby on her hip. She glances at me and quickly looks away, demurely following him to an open seat two tables away from where Cormac’s favored bloodline sits.
The gaping stares and whispers start at the nearest tables I pass, spreading out to the next rows.
It’s undeniable who I’ve been scent marked by. No one has to come near before their nose figures it out.
I could’ve washed off his mark on me, at least to mute his musk so it wasn’t this…overpowering and fresh .
Except when I poured water into a bowl and soaked the rag, I couldn’t bring myself to wipe it away. My wolf threw a fit that I’d wash off her mate’s scent. Admittedly, a small part of me wanted this moment. To see the reactions of the pack members who have shunned me and those who turn their noses up at me in public while sneaking up to my cabin to beg for my help.
Keeping my head held high and my back straight, I march through the hall, not stopping until I’m at the head table.
Caden watches every step, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth and a gleam in his eyes. This is the first time he’s acknowledged my existence when I’ve brought food out to be served. I lift a brow and hold his gaze, dropping off the toast unceremoniously.
“Thank you,” he says sincerely.
It’s like a switch has flipped in him. His features aren’t set in a steely glare, they’re softened. Attentive and open.
Liam reaches across to get a piece, freezing when Caden snatches his arm, leveling him with a hard stare.
“Mine,” Caden rumbles.
Liam’s head jerks. “What? You never care if I eat before you.”
Caden grunts, shaking his beta’s wrist to get him to drop the toast on his plate. He takes the rest of the basket and dumps it so there’s none left for the few other enforcers seated with him. They cover smiles and avert their gazes.
Liam sits back in his chair and folds his arm, studying his friend. “So you’re not going to share?”
“Fuck no.” Caden shoves half a slice of buttered toast into his mouth .
Hodge, one of the older members of the guard that used to lift me on his shoulders as a kid, chuckles at Liam. “You don’t know shit about mates, do you?”
“Here, have this one.” I start to set down a second basket, but Caden makes to steal that one for himself, too. My brows jump up. “What’s the problem?”
“Mine,” he reiterates to me with a playful snap of his teeth that makes my insides swoop with a thrill. “No one else in this pack gets to eat what you bring over. Only me.”
I exchange an exasperated look with Liam. He holds up a hand.
“It’s okay. Come on, guys. If we want to be fed, looks like we’re sitting elsewhere.” Liam gets up, motioning to the others.
Hodge pats Caden’s shoulder when he rises to follow. Ford and Gabriel head off to find open seats at the table where Emily drops off steaming cranberry scones.
“Satisfied? You’re alone at the head table now,” I say.
“Very,” Caden answers as he licks butter and jam from his thumb, the corners of his eyes crinkling.
Heat blooms in my cheeks at the display. I track his tongue, captivated by his mouth. He eyes me alluringly, giving the impression he knows where my mind’s strayed.
Shaking my head, I go back to the kitchen. My wolf is basking in all this. Since he scented me last night, she’s on a high, proudly strutting around smelling of her mate in front of the pack. She loves the way it broadcasts that we’re his to everyone, as it should be.
I bite my lip, stomach tightening pleasantly at the thought. My heart gives several thudding beats. I don’t hate the feeling, or the idea as much as I should.
The whispering isn’t as bad the second time I go out with eggs and sausages. Surprisingly, there isn’t as much hostility either. Maybe that’s why he insisted on this, to show the pack he doesn’t view me as his enemy anymore. A few people even wave at me and offer tentative smiles. I almost trip, smacked in the gut from how much I’ve longed to feel like I belonged in the pack instead of existing in its shadow.
Caden thanks me again, then stops me. “Do you want to sit? Have breakfast with me.”
I blink. “No. Probably best I don’t.”
“Why not? Have you eaten yet? Here, try mine.”
I back away before my wolf takes him up on the offer to eat off his plate. “I’m fine. Wouldn’t want to give anyone the notion you don’t mind people slacking off their assigned rotation.”
He lets me go with a nod. I retreat to the safety of the kitchen.
The respite only lasts a short while before Taryn finds me.
“Avery,” she sing-songs. “Apparently, Alpha Blackburn’s appetite isn’t satisfied.”
She waggles her brows.
“What? He’s still here?” I blurt.
She shakes a basket of scones. “He wants more.”
“Food,” I clarify.
“Of course.” She winks. “What else would I mean?”
Sighing, I brave the dining hall to bring him a second helping. This time rather than watch me, he stares down everyone else, giving those that still eye me in distaste a hard glare.
I deliver the food and hurry out of the hall, certain that this will be the end of this bizarre breakfast shift.
Except just as I get ready to leave, Taryn finds me a third time.
“Avery.” She can’t keep her smile in check and puts another dish in my hands. “The alpha’s still hungry. Called for you again.”
“Again?” I exclaim in exasperation.
A hot tug pulls in my chest with his will to draw me out. I swallow, fighting how much I want to answer.
Another tug.
Come to me , it whispers enchantingly. I inch towards the dining hall.
Damn it.
I try to give the food back. “You take it.”
She smirks, peeking through the window. “I don’t think so. He’s watching the door, waiting for you.” She nudges me out and smacks my backside. “Good luck. Go get ‘em.”
This time I circle his table and loom over his chair when I plop the third helping down. “Why do you keep calling me back every five minutes?”
He lifts his amused gaze to me. “I’m hungry.”
“Should I stand here and feed you, too?” I mutter.
His enticing hum is laced with intrigue. The deep, smoky noise stirs something pleasant in my core.
“As much as I like that idea, no.” His knuckle brushes the inside of my wrist and his lips twitch. “I should get my day started. If Liam pokes his head in here one more time to check on me, he’ll drag me out by my tail.”
I roll my lips between my teeth, wrestling back the urge to follow him out before he’s even left. “Well, I hope you enjoyed this.”
“I did.” He stands and gives me a drawn out once over, tracing his lower lip with his tongue. “My wolf, too.”
“Good,” I huff. “Because it won’t be happening again.”
His mouth curves and he dips his nose, inhaling with the faintest rumble of pleasure that makes my insides melt. Everything in me strains to lean into him, to tilt my head and give him my throat. My cheeks heat at the hooded look he pins me with before he sweeps his gaze at all the packmates in the dining hall.
“I’ll see you later.”
Caden leaves me standing at the head table with every eye in the room on me. The inside of my wrist tingles with the memory of his touch.