20. Liam
Chapter 20
Liam
I pull into my driveway, gripping the steering wheel so tight my knuckles turn white. My heart’s pounding like crazy, and I can’t shake off the image of Selene’s face, those intense eyes staring right through me. What the hell is happening to me? How can I be so drawn to her, especially after what she is?
I get out of the car, and her scent hits me: lavender mixed with something else, something wild and alluring. I gotta get rid of it. I head to the garage, grab a bucket, and start washing the car, hoping the water and soap will wash away her scent. I peel off my shirt, tossing it aside. The night’s cool, but I’m sweating like crazy.
As I scrub, my mind’s racing. I have to report what happened to Mia and the attack on Selene by those damn wolves. But then I’d have to explain how I buried Mia without telling anyone about Selene, about how she killed Mia, about feeding Selene my blood.
I’m in deep shit.
I broke the accords, and even with my mom on the council, I doubt she can save me.
And if they appoint a new protector, I don’t know if they can keep Selene safe.
I finish washing the car, but her scent lingers. I grab a rag and wipe down the seats, trying to erase every trace of her. I hear a rustle behind me and whirl around, heart racing. It’s just a stray cat, probably looking for food.
I toss the rag aside and lean against the car, breathing hard. “What the hell am I going to do?” I mutter to myself.
I walk into my house and straight into my shower. I have to get rid of any traces of her if I want to at least pretend to move on.
I strip off my clothes, ignoring the raging boner I have had since her teeth sunk into my palm.
No one had ever told me how sensual feeding was. How the rush felt better than any drug!
How I would crave it again and again.
I was screwed.
I turn the shower setting to cold, letting the water rain over me.
My breathing is still rugged as I scrub myself clean.
My cock is still hard, with precum glistening at the tip. I wrap my hand around it and stroke once, just to help with the ache in my balls.
My ass clenches in pleasure.
Maybe it is just the adrenaline of it all! Maybe that was the reason for the massive hard-on.
If I can get rid of it, then I’ll be able to think clearly.
I brace one hand on the bathroom wall using the other to massage my cock. The cold water continues to slide over me as I roughly tug at myself.
This has nothing to do with pleasure.
This is just my body reacting and me taking care of it.
I try to keep my mind blank as I thrust into my fist, but soon enough thoughts of Selene come creeping back in.
How her eyes had blazed with desire as she looked up at me with blood-soaked lips!
The way it had felt to wrap my hand around her throat.
Damn it!
My hand moves faster and faster.
I feel sick to my stomach but I cannot bring myself to stop.
I close my eyes, pumping faster.
I clench my jaw so hard that it almost hurts.
Then, without warning, my balls seize up, and with the image of Selene still fresh in my mind, I come spurting streams.
My breathing comes out in sharp gasps as I rinse myself and the floor.
What the hell have I just done?
I avoid looking at myself in the mirror as I wrap a towel around my waist and walk into my bedroom.
After getting dressed, I make my way to the kitchen. It has been a long night, and I haven’t even eaten yet.
I stroll into my kitchen, flicking on the lights. It’s all sleek and modern, just the way I like it. Stainless steel appliances gleam under the bright overhead lights and granite countertops catch the reflection.
My family’s got money, but I’ve made my own path, running Mariya’s. I am proud of the home I have built.
The place has a bachelor pad vibe, no doubt. Photos of my family hang on the walls, reminding me of where I come from. There’s one in particular, taken a few weeks after Grayson was born. Layla’s grinning like a goofball, Colt’s lost in his own world with a stick, Mom is cradling baby Gray, and Dad’s got his arm around her. And there’s me, staring straight at the camera. I don’t know why, but that picture just gets me every time.
The house is quiet, too quiet. It’s just me and the memories in here.
I wish Grayson were here.
I head to the fridge, grabbing ingredients for a decent meal. Cooking has always been my way of unwinding and distracting myself.
Tonight, I decide to make something comforting—spaghetti carbonara. I pull out some thick-cut bacon, eggs, Parmesan cheese, and a box of spaghetti. As I chop the bacon and grate the cheese, the familiar motions calm me down. The sizzle of the bacon in the pan fills the kitchen with a savory aroma, and I start to feel a little better.
I boil the pasta until it’s al dente, then drain it and toss it into the pan with the crispy bacon. Off the heat, I crack a couple of eggs into the steaming hot mixture, stirring quickly to coat the pasta in a creamy sauce. A generous sprinkle of Parmesan cheese adds the finishing touch.
I dish out a hearty portion onto a plate, garnishing it with a sprinkle of black pepper and chopped parsley. It looks damn good if I do say so myself.
As I eat, I can’t shake off the feeling that something’s missing. Maybe it’s about time I start thinking about dating again.
It is time.
I’ve always used the excuse of being the Protector, too busy running Mariya’s, but maybe that was just BS. Maybe my attraction to Selene is out of boredom and loneliness. It has to be.
But even as I consider the idea, my mind keeps drifting back to Selene. It’s like she’s got some kind of hold on me, and I can’t shake it.
I shake my head, trying to clear it. “Focus, Liam,” I mutter to myself. “You got other things to worry about.”
But no matter how hard I try, she’s still there, lurking in the back of my mind. It’s like I’m drawn to her despite knowing how dangerous it is. But I can’t let myself get caught up in that mess.
I finish my meal and clean up, trying to push Selene out of my thoughts.
But as I head to bed, her face flashes in my mind again, and I can’t help but wonder what the fuck I’m going to do about her.
I wake up with a start, sweat trickling down my bare back.
The dream is still fresh in my mind, the memory of my first transformation into a wolf. I was so young, barely a teenager, and yet I remember every detail like it was yesterday.
I remember the fear and confusion as my body twisted and contorted, bones shifting, muscles stretching. I remember the sharp and intense pain as my body reshaped itself into something wild and primal. And I remember the sense of freedom and exhilaration as I took my first steps as a wolf.
Mom didn’t understand it, but she was there for me, along with Mariya and Dad. They helped me through it.
But now, as I lay in bed, shaking and terrified, I can’t help but wonder if they were right to continue supporting me. After all, I am keeping secrets that affect my family. How can I be attracted to someone like Selene, knowing the danger she represents?
I can’t dwell on it, not now. I need to clear my head. I get out of bed and pull on some running clothes, lacing up my sneakers. I head out into the night, the cool air hitting me as I start to run.
The rhythm of my footsteps, the sound of my breathing, it all helps to calm me down. But no matter how hard I try to push it away, Selene’s face keeps intruding into my thoughts.
I run until my legs ache and my lungs burn until I can’t think about anything but the physical exertion. When I finally stop, leaning against a tree to catch my breath, I realize something.
I can’t keep denying this attraction, this pull towards Selene. But I also can’t let it cloud my judgment; I can’t let it put my family or my kind in danger.
I head back home, feeling more resolved than ever. I may not have all the answers, but I know one thing for sure—I need to find a way to navigate this new reality, to find a way to balance my feelings with my responsibilities.
But first, I am going to need to get some answers.