Chapter 10
Chapter Ten
Maisy
Matthias picks me up and bundles me onto the party bus.
“Make good choices,” Hutch calls.
“Use protection!” Canyon says. He and Bern fight past Darius to open the door and throw in a handful of colorful condom packets.
I laugh because they make it funny rather than awkward. Now I know why people love Vegas. Anything goes.
Axel pushes them out of the way and slams the bus door, and Teddy pulls away from the curb.
My new husband sprawls next to me on the back seat. He doesn’t mean to manspread, but he’s so big, he takes up most of the seat and has to stretch his long legs into the aisle.
My wedding ring is a new, satisfying weight on my finger. The diamonds blaze, proof that the past half hour wasn’t a dream.
If the ring didn’t prove it, the puffy, well-kissed feeling in my lips would. My new husband kissed the heck out of me. I can’t stop smiling or touching my lips.
Matthias frowns, taking my hand to study my mouth. “Did I hurt you?”
“No,” I laugh. Why would he think that? He would never hurt me. “It was just…”
“What?”
“It was my first kiss,” I admit.
He looks stunned. Is he just now realizing how much of a late bloomer I am? Twenty-two and never been kissed.
“Maisy.” He groans, and his head drops to his chest, and suddenly I’m worried.
“Is that okay? Was it a bad kiss?” I know he can have any woman he wants. He’s probably been kissed a thousand times by partners way more skilled than I am.
“No. No, you were perfect. Come here.” He pulls me onto his lap, and I don’t fight it. I’m done fighting my feelings or being shy. The past twelve hours were the most harrowing hours of my life.
Why shouldn’t I make out with my new husband? I’ve wanted to touch this man for years. I shift to straddle his waist.
His eyes shine blue. “What are you doing?” His voice is rough and gravelly.
“Practicing kissing with my husband.”
For a moment, I think he hates it, based on the tortured look on his face, but then he smashes his lips against mine, kissing me again. It’s incredible. Divine. He grips the back of my head for his plunder, parting my lips with his tongue.
Under my lap, I sense the bulge of his cock growing harder.
He’s turned on.
I roll my hips, grinding against him.
“Fuck, Maisy.” Matthias’ hands tighten on my hips. His growl sounds inhuman. His eyes glow blue.
Does that mean he’s turned on? By me?
With that encouragement, I go in for another kiss, using my tongue this time, the way he did. I start tentatively, just slipping the tip between his lips, then I grow more bold. The bulge of his cock presses up, warm and hard, right against the notch between my legs.
I rock my hips forward, grinding down on it. My panties instantly soak. Oh God–what if I leave a wet spot on Matthias’ tuxedo pants?
Matthias’ nostrils flare. “Maisy.” His fingers tighten around my hips with bruising strength. Strain laces his voice, like he’s afraid to lose control.
I don’t know how it works with bear shifters. Maybe they only have sex in bear form?
Oh God, is it even possible with a human?
“Maisy,” he chokes. His hands shift from my hips to grip my ass, and he pulls me down harder over his cock.
“Can we?” I whisper.
That look of alarm crosses his face again. “Can we what?”
My face heats, but I distract myself from my embarrassment by grinding on his cock again. “I just don’t know how it works.” My breasts are in his face, and his gaze drifts down at them. “Can you have sex with a human?”
He’s breathing hard, his chest rising and falling like he was running a race. He uses the hands at my waist to lift my hips an inch away from his cock.
I’m tempting him–I can tell.
“We’re not having sex.” He sounds choked. A little angry.
I’d be hurt, but I know he wants me. I may be inexperienced, but I feel certain of it.
I kiss him again, sliding my tongue between his lips.
“Ow!” I draw back at a sting on my lower lip.
“Maisy.” Matthias’ alarm is so great, he lifts me from his lap and sets me down on the bench beside him. “I cut you….” He swipes at my lip with his thumb, and blood comes away. “My fangs. Fuck.”
I realize his canines have extended to bear length. I gasp.
“We can’t.” He looks every inch the grim doctor delivering bad news. “See? This is why we can’t. I’m not safe for you, beautiful.”
My pussy clenches, as if in disappointment. I try to stave off the pain. It’s not a rejection, I remind myself.
Still, that familiar feeling of unworthiness soaks into me. It’s the feeling attached to all the multitude of small and large rejections I received from my drug-addicted parents. I know from therapy they weren’t related to my worthiness, but about their inability to function as decent parents.
“Fuck, Maisy. I want to. You know that, right?”
I nod, but the feeling remains. Sometimes you know something’s true in your head, but it doesn’t change the old familiar feeling.
“Come here.” Matthias gathers me up in his arms and arranges himself sideways on the party bench with his back leaning against the side wall and his legs extending along the back bench.
He cradles me on his lap, pulling my head to lean against his shoulder. He cups my head in his big hand. I feel the cool metal of his own wedding band on my cheek and smell the comforting scent of his delicious cologne. “I just don’t want to hurt you, beautiful. You’re special to me.”
I’m special to him.
Could it be my teen fantasy is coming true? That he has always been interested in me and was waiting for me to grow up?
Whether it’s true or pretend, I choose to believe it.
The feelings of rejection and unworthiness seep away, transformed into a sense of safety. Of being cared for.
Of love.
That seems silly since the marriage is fake, and we hardly know each other, but I choose to believe it, too.
The effects of whatever medicine Matthias gave me have worn off, and I’m suddenly exhausted after staying up all night.
I tuck my face into Matthias’ neck and breathe in his manly scent.
“Sleep, Maisy,” he murmurs. “I’ve got you.”