Chapter 21 - Selene
The crossing takes just over an hour, and Ronan doesn’t say one word to me the whole time.
I stay in the spot he put me, near the front of the boat, with two betas watching me.
Not Tom, as if I don’t deserve a friendly face today.
I’m not sure what he told them, but they watch me full of distrust, as though I might fling myself overboard if they look away.
Maybe I will. I try to catch Ronan’s eye a few times, but he looks straight through me.
Whatever he felt for me died the moment he opened that tablet, and now I’m just back to being the witch he’s using.
He didn’t trust me enough to leave behind, but he can’t bear to look at me, either.
Behind us, there are more boats. A lot of them, with more on the docks ready to leave.
I recognized many of the shifters boarding.
I’ve met their families, I’ve even been planning the winter fair with some of their mates, and now here they are, heading off to fight.
This is my fault. Ronan is rushing into this because he thinks I’ve forced his hand.
Maybe I have, but I was only trying to help. I wanted to stop this from happening, and instead, I seem to have supercharged the situation.
I keep trying to think of a way out, but I keep hitting a brick wall.
The tablet is in pieces on the floor of his cabin; there was no opportunity to send an email warning Emily, anyway.
Ronan won’t listen to me now; he doesn’t trust me, and I don’t think anyone could get through to him at this point.
Perhaps his men will refuse to fight, but I doubt it—they’re loyal to their alpha, and they trust he’ll do the right thing for them.
Because he always has; that’s the frustrating thing.
He’s given them so much, and now he’s going to burn it all down chasing revenge.
As the island draws near, I can’t stand the silence anymore, and as Ronan walks by, I stand.
“Ronan,” I say, and he hesitates but doesn’t turn. “At least let me help. If you have a clinic set up, I can help out…”
“No,” he replies, turning to look at me with a completely flat expression. “You don’t touch my people. I don’t trust you, Selene.”
“But, Ronan, I…” I start, horrified that he thinks I’d hurt his pack.
“You lost the right to help them, or even talk to them,” he says, voice deathly quiet.
It shouldn’t hurt as much as it does. But it does. I think back to when I was brought to the settlement, how much I hated him, how much I wanted to escape. When did that change so much that his words now feel like pure heartbreak?
It’s heartbreak because I love him.
It’s the most stupid truth I’ve ever known, because he was always honest with me that he wanted my magic, he wanted me willing.
He didn’t lie to me about that. And yet, I fell for him anyway.
I was just a means to an end, and now he doesn’t even have to pretend anymore; he’s just upset that I ruined his timeline.
How many bond witches have been this foolish in the past?
Or am I the most ridiculous of them all?
So, I don’t say it, I just think it, because I’m not going to humiliate myself even more. He wouldn’t believe me anyway, or even care.
But I know it still means something to me, because I don’t just love Ronan; I care about his people, too.
He’s about to take them into a battle he’s so sure he’ll win, and perhaps with the bond magic, he might.
But at what cost? My magic has made him stronger, but he’s not a god.
And my magic has harmonized his wolves, making them more effective in battle, but they’re not invincible.
I can’t let him die, or his people die, without trying to do something.
I watch as the boats maneuver the cliff face and slip between the coves.
This is the wild north of the island, and it’s unlike anything I’ve seen before, with lush high cliffs and rich scenery.
I feel the wards as we pass through them, a familiar cold drag over my skin that is there and then gone, powerful wards that make the hairs on my arms stand up.
I knew this settlement existed because it was talked about a lot on the mainland, but I had no idea it was this big and real.
The cabins are modern, there are warehouses, and what looks like a half-built schoolhouse.
There’s a children’s park near the dock.
He built all this for them right under his brothers’ noses on stolen ground.
But does he not see the cost? A children’s playground is no place for a war. He’s built a home here, not a battleground.
Ronan is off the boat without a backward glance before it’s even tied, giving orders, running a war. He says something to Cole, and then, without even looking at me, he says, “Take her to Ryder; he’s the only one I trust to handle watching her.”
Two guards march me through the settlement, up the hill, and what I see chills me to the bone.
The families have obviously been warned that the fight is coming, and women are packing bags with small children, presumably looking to move them somewhere safer; they’re boarding up windows.
They clearly knew this moment was coming and had a plan, but how effective will it be if three packs descend in a rage?
A woman spots me coming, flanked by my guards, and pulls her pups out of the way, watching me carefully, as though she doesn’t know if I’m a friend or the enemy. I’m not sure I know anymore.
With every step, I’m painfully aware that I have caused this escalation.
Ryder is in a long cabin at the stop of the settlement, maps spread everywhere, a laptop open, and three men in the middle of receiving orders when I walk in. He takes one look at me, and his expression turns grim.
“Out,” he tells the men, and they look between them before nodding and heading out. Then it’s just us, the maps, and the sound of the settlement preparing outside. I cross to the window and watch as more ships arrive in the docks below.
“So,” Ryder says behind me, “I have you to thank for all this today?”
There’s no point lying to him; I suspect he already knows the whole story anyway, or at least Ronan’s version of it.
“I guess so,” I say quietly.
He’s silent for a moment, and when he speaks, his voice is almost deliberately calm and even, which is even worse than if he’d started shouting.
“He gave you that tablet because you were homesick,” he says. “Because he couldn’t stand watching you miss your people. Do you have any idea how rare that is, that he even noticed or cared? He doesn’t let anyone in. Not ever. You’re the first.” His jaw tightens. “And you betrayed him.”
For a second, I think he’s going to escalate.
I can feel his rage. On his brother’s behalf.
His wolf is right there in his eyes, and it is not the calm, bookish Ryder I’ve met before.
Then he masters it, and I realize that’s what he does, how he contains his alpha wolf, and just looks at me like I’ve gone and confirmed something he was praying I’d deny.
“I was trying to stop the war, Ryder.” I don’t drop my eyes because I’m done being ashamed of trying to do the right thing.
“I didn’t give them anything that could hurt him.
Or your people. Not this place; I don’t even know where on the island we are.
Everything I sent was to try and make them stand down. ”
“Stand down.” He laughs, and it’s an ugly short sound. “You think three alpha packs were ever going to stand down because a bond witch asked nicely?”
“I think they were closer to it than he wants to think,” I say, holding his gaze.
“I didn’t do it to hurt him. I did it because I care.
About him. About the pack. About every family in these cabins that is going to lose someone in a war that they didn’t start.
I don’t want anyone to get hurt, Ryder. That’s all I was thinking, and I don’t want him to die out there tonight trying to get revenge on the wrong people. ”
Something in him gives, just slightly. He turns away, one hand braced on the table.
“The women don’t want this either,” I press, while I can. “Ava, Emily, and Serena. They’ve been working on their mates for weeks to try to hold them back from retaliating against the raids, and it was working, I think. They told me more about Ralph.”
Something moves across his face at the name.
“They told me he wasn’t just cruel to you and Ronan,” I say. “He was a monster to all of them. Callum, Tristen, and Aiden. He beat them. He terrified them. They grew up with scars. The brothers that Ronan thinks got everything also got violence and tragedy. Their mother didn’t survive, either.”
Ryder goes very still.
“I didn’t know that,” he says, and for the first time, his voice isn’t steady.
“Would it have changed anything, for you or Ronan?” I ask.
“Our mother used to say it.” He’s not really talking to me now.
“Near the end. That she felt sorry for the boys in that big house. That the man who threw us away wasn’t the Ralph she met, that he was cruel, and when she saw his true colors, she realized that he would be a tyrant all his life.
I thought she was being soft, but perhaps she had the measure of the man. ”
“She was right,” I say. “And I still think they would stand down and talk if Ronan gave them a chance.”
Ryder is quiet for a moment and then crosses to the window where I’m standing, and we both watch the ships coming in.
“I never wanted the island. Not really. I wanted a house, and my books, and a life that didn’t feel like fighting every day.
But I’ll always be on Ronan’s side, because he’s my brother, and he’s all I’ve got.
I keep thinking I’ll be able to stop him if he ever goes too far, but I’m starting to doubt that.
“You have to understand what the island is to him,” he goes on before I can reply.
“It was never really about the territory. He just wants to prove a point to himself and everyone else. That Ralph was wrong to throw us away, that the bloodline didn’t matter, and his illegitimate sons were the strongest. He wants to bring our mother home and bury her back with her pack, her parents.
This island means so much to him that he can’t see that it doesn’t really matter at all. ”
“Then don’t give up,” I plead. “Surely it’s worth trying again. This can be stopped.”
I think he’s going to tell me to get lost, but then I see the hesitation on his face. His love and loyalty for Ronan are palpable, and I hold my breath. Suddenly, he heads for the door. “Stay here,” he says, stopping at the door. “And Selene. If he asks, we barely spoke about this; it’s all on me.”
I don’t stay. Of course I don’t.
We find Ronan down by the water, where the boats keep coming.
He’s in the center of all of it, hundreds of them moving to commands he barely needs to speak, and I can feel the bond running through the whole thing—my magic, threaded through the pack, making them faster and deadlier.
I gave him that. Whatever happens now, I’m the one who helped create it, and that’s why I can’t leave Ryder to talk to him alone.
“Ronan.” Ryder’s voice cuts clean through the noise. “Walk with me. Two minutes.”
“I don’t have two minutes,” he says, barely looking away from the latest ship to arrive.
“Make time,” Ryder says gently but firmly.
Something in his tone causes the men nearest us to stop and look. Ronan turns, and as the brothers look at each other, the whole beach seems to go quiet around them.
Ronan walks with Ryder along the jetty, and I can only just about hear Ryder’s plea for his brother to change course.
The words don’t really matter because the body language is speaking volumes.
The brothers circle each other as Ryder’s tone hardens under Ronan’s retaliation, and Ronan’s wolf grows ever more restless.
“…That’s the end of it. Stand down, or stand aside.” Ronan snarls, walking back toward the dock.
“No,” Ryder says, and the word drops like a stone.
I’m not sure if the pack has ever seen the two alpha brothers argue before, certainly not like this.
They shift uneasily on the docks, trying to look busy but clearly unable to look away, either.
Ronan pauses, and it’s deadly; something flashing behind his eyes tells me his wolf is right under the surface.
He steps closer to Ryder, right into his space. “Say that again.”
And Ryder, who strikes me as one of the calmest shifters I’ve ever met, instead of backing down, steps up, suddenly looking bigger than before, as if letting his alpha wolf flex for the first time in a long time.
My knees nearly go out from under me as I watch the scene and others back up.
I grab the edge of a crate to stay on my feet, because being this near two alphas about to snap is like standing between two storm fronts.
I’ve never felt anything like it in my life. Neither of them so much as blinks.
“I said,” Ryder growls, and the voice isn’t his anymore, “stop. You have to stop.”
For one horrible second, I’m certain that the brothers are about to tear each other apart, two alphas nose to nose, about to start their own war. The fear that they’re going to destroy themselves is almost too much to bear. I right myself and step forward, desperate to stop this any way I can.
Then, before I can get a word out, the wards break.
I feel it before I hear it. The same cold drag as before, but wrong now, tearing, like a seam pulled apart all at once and rolling down the hill.
A flurry of shouts and an alarm sounds in the distance.
The settlement isn’t ready, and they know the one thing that was keeping them safe is gone.
I hear women shouting and children being herded quickly toward one of the ships.
Ronan and Ryder break apart, and whatever could have transpired between them only a moment ago is gone, replaced by the loyalty they’ve shared for a lifetime.
“They’re through,” someone screams from the ridge. “The wards are down…they’re in the trees …”
The rest is lost in the wind, because that’s when I see the first wolves break through the tree line, and I stagger back in horror.
The war I tried so hard to stop is here—and it’s all my fault.