Chapter 10
chapter ten
nesto
“Did you tell me to meet you at a bowling alley?” I asked into my phone as I made my way to meet Jude.
“Yes, I did. It’s less than a five-minute walk from both our houses and they have a great bar.”
I felt a warmth radiating through my chest just from hearing his voice.
After his brush-off yesterday, I’d almost given up on seeing him again.
Then I got a message from him almost at five asking if I wanted to meet up.
I hadn’t seen him since he left my house Sunday night.
Only two days, but it felt longer. With the phone pressed against my ear, I covered the few hundred yards from my building to the bowling alley.
The desire to see him practically propelling me to the door.
“I’m about to walk in then. See you soon.” I ended the call with a flutter in my chest. I was hungry for the sight of him. To touch him. More excited than I’d felt about anyone in a long time.
I walked into the bowling alley and looked around.
I knew the place had only been open a couple of months.
It had a retro vibe, which seemed to be a theme around here.
Lots of gleaming wood and chrome. I glanced around and spotted Jude sitting at the bar, sipping a pint of dark beer.
He was wearing a red-and-white gingham shirt with gray slacks.
His blond curls rumpled, like they always seemed to be at the end of the day.
I stopped for a moment to look at him. He was reading something on his phone, his face serious, totally focused. He seemed unaffected by the people talking around him, the music coming from the speakers or the sounds of bowling balls crashing against the pins.
He was a peaceful and quiet presence amongst all the noise and movement.
I probably would’ve stood there for ages, just watching him, but as if he could feel my eyes on him, after a few seconds he glanced up and saw me.
The smile that broke out on his face when he did lit me up.
I knew I probably had a carbon copy of it on my own face as I walked toward him.
When I got to him I put my hand under his chin, tipping his head up before I leaned in for a kiss, without giving it a second thought.
He seemed a little startled when I pulled back and I felt like a jackass.
What if he didn’t want people to see us kissing?
Maybe he wasn’t out in town. Maybe he didn’t want this at all.
I didn’t have the right to do that and I rushed to apologize. “I’m sorry, I should’ve asked if it was okay for me to kiss you.”
He didn’t smile, but he shook his head. “It’s okay.” He looked down as a blush worked itself up his neck, making me want to maul him.
“I don’t know what it is about you, Jude Fuller.
I can usually keep my shit together when I like a guy, but when I see you, all I want to do is get my hands on you.
” I sounded flustered even to my own ears.
I expected him to come back with a grumpy reply like he usually did, but he just sat there quietly.
There was something a little off, like he was holding himself back.
The idea of losing the closeness we’d had a few nights ago made me uneasy.
“Also someone owes me, since they left this on me the other night.” I pulled on the neck of my t-shirt and exposed the skin where I had the fading bite mark. Jude’s neck and face went bright red, then he took a big gulp of his beer and turned so he was facing away from me.
“Like I said, I have no clue how that got there.” I could see the small smile he was biting back, and it was like the sun was coming out after total darkness. His shoulders relaxed and I could tell he was a little pleased with himself. “You want me to demonstrate?” The smile got wider.
“You’re a bad influence, Ernesto Vasquez.” His tone was easy again and the warmth in my chest from being the one to bring that out in him was a revelation.
I needed to calm down before I really did something reckless and pushed him too far. So, I turned my attention to getting a drink and figuring out our plan for the evening.
I pointed to his beer. “What are you having?”
It took him a moment to react, but then he picked up the glass and offered it to me. “It’s a chocolate stout. Local, of course.” The smile he gave me was radiant, sharing an inside joke. I didn’t respond, caught off guard by how much I already felt for Jude.
I cleared my throat and turned to the bartender, “I’ll have what he’s having.”
She winked at me as she grabbed a pint glass. “You got it.”
After I got my drink I stood next to him, leaning in close. I’d gone home to change after work, but I’d worn one of my OuNYe hats.
Had to stay on brand.
Jude pointed his glass in the direction of my head.
“How did the truck do yesterday?” He looked so serious, like my answer really mattered to him.
“Good. The B&B wants us to do dinner there twice a week now, instead of just Fridays. I met with them today to get it all on paper. They said they’re trying a few different trucks but want to find a few to be there on certain nights for the long-haul, which would be great.”
He looked so pleased. “That’s awesome, Nesto. Sounds like you’ll be busy this summer.”
I took a sip from the beer and nodded. “They’re really ramping up the ads for the festival, too. I think it’s going to be good.”
Jude nodded in agreement. “They’ve been advertising for months. It’s going to be a huge event.” He paused then, as if considering something. After a moment, he looked straight at me, his expression serious. “If you need an extra hand, let me know. I’d be happy to help.”
There was that reckless feeling again.
“Thank you, I might take you up on that.”
His cheeks reddened at my words. Jude’s shy little smiles were going to be hell on that master plan.
We stood there in silence for a second and I wondered if he was as affected as I was. I wanted to ask him, are you feeling this, too?
But I veered into safer waters. “Enough about me. How was work?”
His face darkened at that. “It was fine.” He exhaled like he was thinking of something annoying, and I wondered if it was that woman.
“Anyone bothering you at work?” He shook his head, clearly not wanting to get into it.
“Oh just Misty being Misty. She didn’t bother you at the truck again did she?”
“No. I hope she’ll just move on to something else and forget I’m there.”
He looked like he wanted to say something else, but instead, jerked his thumb toward the restaurant area. “Do you want to get something to eat?” I was trying to think of a way to get whatever he’d been about to say out of him when he spoke again. “Or we could do some bowling.”
I laughed, throwing my hands up at the suggestion. “I’m up for it, but you’re going to have to show me. I don’t think I’ve ever been bowling, not that I can remember anyways.”
Jude’s look of horror was hilarious. “What? How is that even possible?”
I shrugged, grinning at his bemused expression.
“I don’t know, I assume there are bowling alleys in New York City, but I’ve never been to one.”
He grabbed his drink and stood up with purpose. “Well, we need to remedy this right now.” I turned around to leave some money for our beers and followed him to the bowling shoes counter. That’s when I remembered why I didn’t bowl.
Deadass, I didn’t fuck with corny-looking used shoes.
“Jude, I don’t know if I’m down with wearing those,” I said, pointing at the shelves. This time he did laugh at me.
“You’re wearing socks, it’s fine.”
“Okay, but just for the record, my people don’t mess with shit that involves hauling forty-pound balls while wearing rented shoes.”
Jude chuckled like I wasn’t being totally serious, and I had to admit I was feeling pretty good about myself.
I liked making Jude Fuller laugh.
Jude
“Okay you’ve swiftly kicked my ass at bowling for a solid hour and now I need to eat.” Nesto’s grin gave him away that even though he really was terrible at bowling, he had fun. Not that he was even trying to learn.
For the most part, the last hour involved me bowling and him finding excuses to touch me.
I tried not to get into my head too much about what was going on between us.
I knew at some point he would go back to fully focusing on his business, and I would go back to being alone.
But for now, I’d enjoy his presence. Anything beyond that felt too perilous to consider at the moment.
“Damn, I know I suck, but you don’t have to look so torn up about it.” I looked over my shoulder at Nesto, and I could tell he knew whatever I’d been thinking about, it wasn’t his bowling.
He was trying to make me laugh. Even after only a couple of times together, Nesto cared enough to know when I needed a distraction or a word to get me out of my head. I shook myself off and tried to get back the lighter mood we’d had just a moment before.
“Well, your bowling is sort of astonishing in its horribleness. I kinda want to keep watching.”
A bark of laughter came out of him, and he pulled me close again.
Not for a kiss this time. Just to touch, talking to me as he ran his hands over my arms and shoulders.
“I am hungry though.” He seemed so content just from being with me.
“You want to order something here?” He looked up at the clock on the wall behind us, then smiled.
“Actually, it’s still early. If you don’t mind waiting like an hour, I can make us something at my place. ”
The idea of Nesto cooking for me made my stomach flutter.
I wasn’t the best of cooks. I could follow a recipe, but it wasn’t something I was very good at. But I loved home-cooked meals. It was one of the things that I’d missed the most after having to leave home, and why I was so grateful for dinner at Carmen’s house every week.
I thought of my sister Mary, and the Sunday meals she’d prepared, of my whole family eating together.
Then I remembered the last meal I’d had with them and felt like someone had punched me in the gut.
I glanced up and saw that Nesto was looking at me worriedly.
I felt small and stupid for still getting so upset about things with my family.
The conversation with Carmen from that first day I met Nesto came back to me.
If I wasn’t up for dating, if I didn’t mind being alone, why was I here with him? Why did I keep coming back? Because he was a good man and he looked at me like he wanted me.
Hadn’t I earned the right to have that?
“Jude.” Nesto touched my elbow, his fingers only lightly on me, as if he was afraid to startle me. “We don’t have to do that if you don’t want to. We can—”
I cut him off because I didn’t want him to think even for a second any of this was about him. “No, actually that sounds great. I don’t usually eat until later, anyway.” The tension in his shoulders relaxed, making my own apprehension subside.
“What do you want me to make for you?”
“Spaghetti and meatballs?” He seemed surprised at the speed and intensity of my answer, and I cringed at my weirdness.
“Okay, I can do that. I actually have a couple of hacks for that. We’ll be eating in no time. Just need to stop by the store to get a few things.”
I nodded as we finished putting on our shoes and returned the bowling ones. “I might have some of the stuff we need at my place. We can just go there, if you don’t mind.”
“Sounds good. So why spaghetti and meatballs?” He asked with a big grin. “You had that answer right at the tip of your tongue.”
I wondered what would happen if I told him about that last Sunday dinner with my family. Would my answer wipe that smile from his face? Would my baggage send him running?
I didn’t want to know that right now.
I did want to be here with him, and tonight, I didn’t feel like lecturing myself on all the ways this could go wrong anymore.
I turned to him, letting myself go with the feverish feeling his presence gave me. “It was my favorite when I was kid.” He smiled at that, his eyes shining and curious. I could tell he wanted to know more. Hear about my family, my people, as he would say.
So, I told him.
“My sister made it all the time for Sunday dinner. It just occurred to me it’s been a long time since I had it.” I stopped there and started walking toward the door, not looking back to see if Nesto had more questions.
He caught up with me just as I walked out to the parking lot.
“Hey, what happened back there?”
I turned around and Nesto was standing up straight, his brows furrowed.
I shook my head. “Sorry. I think I’m just a little tired.”
And overthinking, oversharing.
“I was worried I’d said something to offend you,” he said.
“I don’t want to push you, Jude. If you’re not comfortable with being more than friends.
” He took my hand and squeezed it, his face still serious.
“We can do that.” He looked down at me, and his smile was a little sad, but so genuine.
“I don’t want to mess up with my only friend in Ithaca.
How about it, neighbor? I’ll make you the best spaghetti and meatballs you’ve ever had, and we’ll work on getting some more of those smiles out of you tonight. ”
Friends.
I could do that. Friends felt safer.
“Okay,” I conceded.
The corner of his mouth tipped up. “How about neighbors who kiss on occasion?”
All I could do was push up and oblige.
He grunted as he tongued into my mouth, tasting me. We pulled back at the same time and I shook my head, grinning. How did he do that? Make everything okay again with a kiss.
“There it is. I’m going to make it my mission to keep you smiling, neighbor.”
“I thought your mission was getting your business to be a success.”
He looked serious for a moment, then whispered, “I told you, I adapt.”