Chapter 13
chapter thirteen
tom
“Your daughter? You never mentioned a kid!” Camilo’s face went from surprise to panic in a surprisingly short time when I said the word daughter.
I tried to speak calmly as I got dressed, because I knew I was on very thin ice right now.
I didn’t want him to think I’d intentionally not told him about Libe.
I’d thought about it, of course, but decided to wait on it until things were on more solid ground.
For when he finally agreed to go out on an actual date with me.
Except when he did, I’d immediately brought him to my house and fucked him, instead of having a conversation.
I looked up and saw him struggling into his tights and cursed Maxwell for totally destroying my evening.
“She’s four and I co-parent her with my ex-husband.” His eyes, which were already pretty big, got huge at the mention of an ex-husband.
I put my hands up in an attempt to de-escalate the situation, knowing I had about thirty seconds before Libe got fed up with waiting and barged into the room.
“We got divorced when Libe was just a baby. We’ve been sharing custody since. She’s with me most of the time, but he has her on Wednesday nights and every other weekend.” I sighed, trying to control my annoyance at the situation. “This was supposed to be my night to myself.”
Camilo looked frazzled and very close to running out of the house. I tried to get closer, to touch him. But in the same moment, he bent down to grab his tank top, which had ended up tossed over the back of a chair.
“I didn’t intentionally not tell you,” I pleaded, hoping he could see I was being sincere. “Telling someone I’m seeing about Libe is a big deal for me, and I was hoping we’d get to a place where it made sense to talk to you about her.”
He stood on the other end of the room, looking like he regretted every decision he’d made in the last hour.
“Please don’t think I was keeping things from you, Camilo. I wasn’t.” He seemed to soften at this and let me grab his hand. I pulled him closer for a kiss, but just as our mouths met, Libe yelled from the hallway again.
“Daddy, what are you doing in there? Were you sleeping? It’s not even my bedtime yet!”
At least Camilo found her funny. He shook his head, laughed, and pulled away.
“You should go to her. I’m just going to finish getting dressed.”
I was not okay with that idea at all, and spoke in a much whinier tone than I intended. “But I don’t want you to get dressed. I want you to get back in my bed. Naked.”
He just pointed at the door and whispered, “Go.”
I pulled on a t-shirt and stepped out into the hallway.
Libe had clearly dressed herself before the movies.
She was wearing her “The Future is Female” t-shirt under a My Little Pony hoodie and leggings with unicorns on them.
Her curls were all over the place, too. Seeing her melted away all my annoyance.
She had her little hands on her hips and looked like she was about to give me a piece of her mind for keeping her waiting.
“Hey, muchachita, what are you doing here?”
I knelt down in front of her after giving Maxwell a withering look.
I knew he’d come over to see what I was up to.
I hadn’t dated anyone seriously since the divorce, so managing a relationship hadn’t come up so far.
I was not going to lose Camilo this early just because Maxwell couldn’t resist snooping around my life.
“I thought you guys were going to the movies?” My tone was not exactly friendly and Maxwell knew me well enough to know this pop-in was not going to go over well.
Libertad on the other hand dished out one of her meme worthy eye rolls.
“We did! We came to the one close to this home. Papa said I could come and get my book if I wanted after.” Of course, it wasn’t like she didn’t have a bookshelf with a hundred books at Maxwell’s place. This was just a bullshit excuse to come and see what I was doing.
I sent another glare in his direction. “That’s a lot of running around on a school night.”
He lifted a shoulder like he had no clue why I was so annoyed. “We were close. I parked in the garage across the street. We’ll head out soon. Libe, honey, go get your book.”
She nodded and started heading to her room which was next to mine. But at the last minute she turned and went into my room. I thought of stopping her but figured it might as well happen now. As I walked over I heard her introducing herself to Camilo.
“Hi, I’m Libertad.”
As I stepped into the room I saw Camilo kneeling in front of her with a big smile on his face. He extended his hand to shake her little one.
“Hi, Libertad. I’m Camilo. It’s nice to meet you. I love your outfit.”
She preened and twirled around to give him the full effect. Camilo chuckled and looked at me. I just lifted a shoulder. She was something, I agreed.
“I dressed myself.”
He nodded solemnly. “You did a great job.”
Libe looked like she was about to sit down for a “getting to know you” session with Camilo, but I scooped her up before my night really did go up in flames.
“Hey, senorita, you were here for a book and then going home to Papa’s house. Say goodbye to Camilo and we’ll go get it, so you can go to bed. It’s a school night.”
She didn’t look happy, but she waved goodbye to Camilo. Before I walked out, I mouthed, “I’ll be right back.” He didn’t look too sure about my request, so I tried to hurry and get Libe sorted out.
By the time Libe and I got her book and went downstairs, Maxwell was by the door and it looked like Camilo was down there, too, putting on his shoes and looking ready to leave.
“Camilo, this is my ex-husband, Maxwell.” I put extra emphasis on the ex part. Maxwell just stood there looking at me placidly like he had no clue why I was so annoyed.
After it seemed like Camilo was too spooked to react, Maxwell extended his hand to him and smiled. “Nice to meet you.”
Camilo thrusted his own hand out and gave him a very short handshake, barely making eye contact.
“Same.” He looked up, where Libe was perched on my hip and smiled. “It was nice to meet you, Libe.” Then he turned and gave me a look I couldn’t read. “Thanks for everything, Tom.”
“I’ll call you.” I didn’t even try to hide the urgency in my voice.
He nodded, but his blank expression gave no indication on whether the call would be welcome.
“Sure.” With that, he muttered a goodbye in Maxwell’s direction and walked out.
I turned to Maxwell, trying my best not to yell in front of Libe. He at least had the decency to look remorseful.
“I’m sorry! I just thought I’d catch you before you left for whatever you were doing.
I didn’t know you’d have company. That’s never happened before.
” He threw his hands up like it was a real shock to find out I had a life.
“I never thought I’d actually find you here…
entertaining.” He let out an awkward laugh.
“I didn’t think you knew people could do that sort of thing at six p.m. on a Wednesday.
” When I didn’t answer he deflated and angled his head toward the door.
“Next time I’ll call if we have to come over. ”
“Thank you.” I said tersely, then looked at Libe who was sucking her thumb as we talked. “And you better get to bed, young lady.”
“Okay, Daddy.” She gave me a kiss and went to Maxwell’s waiting arms. Soon after they walked out of the house and across the street to the parking garage. As soon as I saw them off, I ran up the stairs to get my phone.
I was going to call Camilo, grovel, and hopefully repair any damage done in the last twenty minutes.
Camilo
“Help me!” I yelled into my phone as I walked into my apartment.
I’d been so out of sorts when I left Tom’s house I’d actually sprung for a Lyft instead of taking the subway.
The encounter with the adorable kid and the tall, blond ex who looked like a runway model had left me too unsettled to deal with the New York City subway system.
I heard some shuffling on the phone and after a few seconds, Patrice finally spoke. “Okay, but can you tell me what you need help with?”
He sounded short of breath, and I immediately got annoyed. “Are you at Easton’s? Do you even go to work, or is fucking with that guy your full-time job now?”
I heard the kind of exhale that meant Patrice was already on his last nerve with me. Too fucking bad, this was an emergency.
“Camilo, I don’t have to tell you what I was doing, but for your information, I was at the gym. I’ve been going with Ted, Carmen’s husband.”
“Oh.” Carmen was Jude’s best friend and I knew they hung out all the time now.
A pang of nostalgia hit me. We would never be together like that again.
Now Patrice and Nesto were upstate and it was just Juanpa and me here.
Our lives were changing so fast, and now I had to grapple with the fact that Tom came with quite the package.
Fuck.
“What’s going on, Camilo?”
I hesitated for a second on how much to say, but I needed help figuring this out, and Patrice was the only one who would tell me exactly what I had to hear. No matter how much I didn’t want to.
“Well I fucked Tom and it was even more amazing than I could’ve ever imagined.
” I sighed, reliving the horror of getting caught by a four-year-old.
“Then five minutes after we were done, his secret baby and husband showed up at his house!” I slumped on my little love seat, trying not to be too dramatic, but I was having a very hard time regulating my emotions.
Usually I was not the guy calling for advice. I was the one who gave advice. Tom had me all over the place. The worst part was I knew I would be back for more. Fucking him had done nothing to slake my thirst for him; it was worse now.
Way worse.
Patrice’s voice was so steady when he answered, it was like he’d barely registered my revelation of a secret husband and baby.
“Please explain in detail what you mean. Is he actually married, Camilo?”
“No.” I grumbled. “He’s divorced. And it’s not actually a baby, she’s like four.
He said he and his ex got divorced when she was still a baby, and now they share custody.
The guy didn’t seem jealous or anything, but he did look like he’d dropped by looking for something.
” I knew I sounded childish, but I couldn’t help it.
“Things were going so well, too. Fuck, I knew this would happen. As soon as I let myself go for it, everything gets complicated. So much for perfect Tom Hughes.”
I could tell Patrice was trying hard not to sound exasperated.
“Camilo, you know better than anyone life is never that simple, especially when it comes to relationships. I also know you wouldn’t want someone perfect, or even near perfect.
You’d want someone kind and with his head on straight.
Sounds to me like this was just bad timing, and that considering the situation, it went pretty well. Did Tom ask you to leave?”
I pursed my lips at his question, because now we were getting at the fact that I’d acted like a hot mess. “No, he asked me to stay, but I felt weird, so I just went home while Libertad and the ex were still there. He named his kid Freedom in Spanish, Patrice. It’s like the universe hates me.”
Patrice chuckled at my whining. “It sounds like the universe is telling you something. Milo, don’t let your doubts cheat you of someone that could be great.
Give it a chance. You have a lot of information showing you he’s a good guy.
Maybe there’s more to him than you originally thought, but so what?
We all have our shit.” He paused then, and when he spoke again, he sounded so serious.
“We’re all struggling to figure out how to negotiate what we thought were our absolutes with the people life puts in our paths.
None of this shit is easy. We at least learned that lesson well, Milo. ”
I sighed and felt such yearning to have him here. I also wondered if he was talking about himself and Easton. I knew merging those two worlds wouldn’t be easy.
“Are things okay with you and Easton? I’m sorry I haven’t asked, you’ve just been so secretive about it.”
“I’m not ready to talk about it yet.” Patrice’s voice sounded tired but firm, and I knew pushing would get me nowhere.
“Alright, but you know—”
“I know, Milo, but we were talking about you. So, what are you going to do? Are you going to let a little girl and some ex scare you away?”
I didn’t want to be scared away.
Just as I was about to say so, I heard my phone ping with another call.
I pulled it from my ear to look at the screen and saw it was Tom.
I let the warmth I felt in my chest make the decision about taking the call for me.
Sure, feelings in my body parts had steered me wrong in relationships countless times, but I could still smell him on me.
I wasn’t strong enough to close that door yet.
“P, it’s him on the other line.”
“Okay don’t jump down this throat. Let him talk.”
“Fine! Thanks, friend. I love you.”
“Love you, too.”
I ended the call and picked up the one from Tom. As I said hello, I couldn’t ignore my racing heart or how much I hoped this call would put us back where we’d been an hour ago.