Chapter 31
NATALIE
“Come on, I’ll buy you a pizza,” Hux said.
“I think I just want to drink and wallow.”
“I’m going to wallow with you,” he said.
“I’m fine, Hux,” I told him. “It wasn’t a big deal. I know it could have been much worse. I just wish you would have maybe pulled the guy aside instead of letting Hudson get all hot and bothered. You had to know your brother was going to react that way.”
“I didn’t think it would come to blows,” he said.
“You obviously haven’t been paying attention to your brother,” I said. “You know he’s got a hair trigger. What did you tell him?”
“I didn’t tell him much of anything,” he replied.
I shook my head. The fight had been hours ago, but the energy in the shop was still humming.
I was just glad it happened back there and not out front in front of any customers.
Hudson had stormed off this morning after Hux pushed him out.
I was worried he might be doing something he would regret.
Hux assured me he had talked to him and everything was all good.
Now, the shop was closed, and I just wanted to go home and drown my sorrows. “I hope he is okay.”
“He’s fine, but he reminded me again that I am not to let you walk home alone.”
“I’m not a child,” I said.
“And yet you were terrified to walk home alone last night,” he reminded me.
“I wasn’t terrified,” I argued.
“You weren’t not terrified,” he corrected.
“That was different.”
“I think you can understand why he might be a little concerned,” he said.
“Now you’re just trying to scare me,” I pouted.
“We both just want to make sure you’re safe,” he said. “We don’t know this Trey character. He’s already proven to be a bit of a loose cannon. The guys all said he went after Hudson first.”
“I believe it,” I said. “Something is not quite right with him. I’m glad he’s gone. I just hope he doesn’t cause any more trouble.”
“Which is why I’m walking you home,” he said. “Come on. I’m hungry. I already called in a pizza order.”
We walked to the pizza place that was on the way.
When we got back to my place, I got out the paper plates while he opened two of the beers from the six-pack I insisted on getting.
We sat on the couch with our feet resting on the coffee table.
It had been a while since we did this. Hux and I used to spend at least one night a week eating dinner together. Sometimes more often.
“This is good,” I said.
“The pizza?”
“In general,” I said. “We haven’t hung out in a while. Probably not since Hudson came home.”
“I know,” he said. “I’ve been trying to spend time with him. He’s not settling in.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“He told Teresa and me he felt torn,” he explained.
“He doesn’t feel like this place is really his home.
He’s really missing his team. I think he’s just having a hard time turning off that part of him.
He’s used to being on all the time. He’s used to thinking someone is trying to kill him or one of his people. ”
“Oh,” I said and tried not to read too much into it.
It was a little disappointing to know I wasn’t enough of a draw to keep him home.
I had no idea he had one foot out the door.
Then again, we had not actually talked about what we were.
We had sex a couple of times. That was it.
I felt a strong attachment to him because of all he had helped me overcome.
He was my rescuer. He rescued me from my prison.
I supposed for him, saving people was second nature. He was used to rescuing people.
“So, what did happen last night?” he asked.
“Not really anything,” I said. “It was more of an implied threat. I don’t believe for a second the man was actually attracted to me.”
“Why wouldn’t he be attracted to you?”
“Because I’m not the kind of girl guys lust after,” I said with a laugh.
“When guys have their little fantasies, I’m not the star of the show.
He reminded me of one of those really bad movies.
You know the one where the football jock flirts with the nerdy girl.
Then to find out it’s a dare or some kind of cruel joke.
That’s what it felt like. He wasn’t attracted to me.
His flirting was just weird and uncomfortable.
It was dirty and salacious. It didn’t make me feel pretty or flattered. It made me want to take a shower.”
“Did he say something vulgar?”
I shook my head. “That’s the strange part. It wasn’t anything he said, but it was the feeling of being bullied. I know I sound ridiculous. I can’t explain it, but I do know it’s important to listen to one’s gut.”
“I get it,” he said. “I’m glad you did. I always had a feeling around him as well.”
“I’m sorry if I caused any drama between you and Hudson.”
“You didn’t,” he said. “I’m just worried about him. I want this thing he’s trying to do to work. I think if he can get a win, it will go a long way to making him feel like he belongs. He needs to be tethered.”
“I understand,” I said.
“You are a part of that as well,” he said. “I know you guys have something going. I don’t want details, but I can tell you are into him. He’s pretty into you.”
I snorted and took a long drink of my beer. “Yeah, I noticed.”
“Stop. He just doesn’t express himself like other people do.”
“I know, I know,” I said. “I’m not one of those clingy people. I’m not going to beg him to tell me his feelings and all that. I just don’t know where we stand.”
“Don’t give up on him,” he said. “Hudson has always been the guy that has to be protecting. He’s like one of those dogs that guards sheep.
Hudson is the low-key guy hanging out in the shadows watching and waiting.
He’s always been the guy looking out for everyone else.
Even my parents knew that. Whenever they would go out or have to work late at the pub, they put Hudson in charge.
They knew no matter what, Hudson would keep us safe. ”
I smiled at the thought of the man protecting his little brother and sister. “I think that’s why I felt so safe getting in the water with him. I never doubted for a moment he would let me drown.”
“Hey, I can swim,” he countered. “I told you I would keep you safe.”
“I know, it was just different.”
He laughed and got up to get two more beers. “It’s cool, you can say it. Hudson is Superman, and I’m like well, does Superman have a sidekick? I’m Robin. I’m the B team.”
He returned and handed me a beer. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to hurt your feelings.”
“Too late,” he pouted.
We both laughed. I knew he wasn’t offended. “Did you get to work on the new business thing?” I asked.
“Not today,” he replied. “I hope that’s what he’s doing with this downtime. Teresa and I want to make sure he knows we are here. We’re not going anywhere.”
“Me either,” I said. “Whether he likes it or not.”
He laughed. “Don’t turn into one of those crazy women.”
“Too late,” I said, using his own words against him.
“I remember when Teresa was going to go out with some guy that Hudson knew a lot better than Teresa did,” he said.
“He showed up at the house and Hudson answered the door. I don’t know how that guy didn’t know Hudson was her older brother.
I was in my room playing a game and heard a bang.
I looked out the window and Hudson had the guy by his shirt with him pushed up against his car.
Teresa was so pissed. The guy took off and never called her again.
Obviously, that was Hudson’s intention, but she was not happy. ”
“I guess we should be glad the situation with Trey didn’t get worse than it did,” I said. “I should have talked to him when we were alone. I could have waited until tonight. Then he would have had time to process and calm down. I guess I need to remember that for the future.”
“He’s going to get better,” he said.
“I know.”
“I hope,” he mumbled. “What do we do if he decides to reenlist? I think there is a window he can go back and return to his old rank.”
“We have to do the best we can to make him feel like he’s wanted and needed here,” I said.
“He is!”
“I know he is, and you know he is, but like you said, we need to ground him,” I said. “We need to get him to buy some real furniture. I don’t even know if he has any real dishes.”
“We should force him to go on a shopping spree,” Hux said.
I snorted. “That sounds easy.”
“Teresa and I mentioned it to him already,” he said, sighing. “I don’t want to harp on it. Hudson does not respond well to being pressured into doing anything. Hudson does what Hudson wants, when he wants.”
I smiled at the description. It was very true. I was crazy about Hudson. He terrified me and attracted me at the same time. I couldn’t imagine him not being in my life. I hoped there was a way to make him stay.
“Be honest,” I said. “Do you think he’s going to go back?”
He didn’t answer right away, which made me worried.
“I don’t know,” he answered. “I honestly don’t know.
I think right now we are in a very tenuous position.
I think the best way to get him to stay is just constantly remind him we’re here.
We are here and we’re not going anywhere.
We’re his people. His team is what he says he misses.
We have to show him we can be his team.”
“I think I’ll be on the bench,” I said, laughing. “I’m not sure he wants me on his team.”
“He does. He will.”
“I guess we’ll see,” I said, sighing.
“If anything, I can’t believe you sailed,” he said, laughing. “You are incredible. I can’t believe you just decided to go sailing after all these years.”
“Me too,” I said. “I certainly didn’t plan it. I think if he would have told me what he had planned, I wouldn’t have ever gone to the dock.”
“I guess he knows what he’s doing,” he said with a laugh.
“I suppose so,” I said. “I’m thinking about buying a boat. Not buying, but building.”
“No shit!” He sat forward and looked at me. “Are you serious?”
“I’m strongly thinking about it.”
“Is that what you’ve been working on?” he asked.
“No,” I said, smiling and tapped at my temple. “I’m still designing it in my head.”
“I’m calling dibs on the first trip,” he said with a grin.