Chapter 27
SANTIAGO
After one of the best weekends of my life, it was tough getting my head back in the game. She wasn’t the only one who hadn’t wanted to be doing anything else for those forty-eight hours. Back on the Station, it was kind of weird knowing Layla was so close and yet so far.
I hadn’t even seen her since we’d said goodbye at my place yesterday afternoon, and yet her car was parked in the lot not far away from mine, letting me know that at least she’d made it back safe. At five a.m. on Monday morning, the memories of the weekend already felt too distant.
Honestly, given the choice, I’d rather just have stayed home with her today, playing hooky and maybe going for another walk on the beach. We’d even discussed doing it, but both of us taking an additional day off after a weekend would’ve been too suspicious.
So here I was, trying and failing to get back to reality. One of the other instructors had taken over the morning run today, so I wouldn’t even have an excuse to see her for at least another thirty minutes—which felt like an age to me right now.
As Commander Nicholson walked into my office, though, I was reminded of why I wasn’t out on the run. He’d requested an emergency meeting with me and I was on edge about it, wondering if somehow it had come out that I’d spent the weekend buried balls deep in Perkins’ daughter.
The set of the Commander’s shoulders was rigid as he narrowed his deep blue eyes at me. “Thanks for giving up your run for me this morning, Cortez. I wouldn’t be interfering if it wasn’t serious, but unfortunately, we’ve got a problem on our hands.”
“Yes, sir.” I had no idea what he was talking about, but that was pretty much the only appropriate reaction to anything he said.
When he spun to close my door behind him, my mouth was bone dry and a tremble ran down my arms. Fuck, he knows. Does he know?
If he knew, there would be no getting away from it.
The man didn’t take any shit and he wouldn’t be sold on some sob story of how I just hadn’t been able to help myself with her.
I could propose to Layla Perkins the very same minute that he called me out on it and he still wouldn’t believe our relationship was serious enough to bend the rules for.
At this point, if he knew, then I was as good as gone.
“What’s been going on, Cortez?” he asked as he turned and marched to the couch in my office instead of to the desk, which would’ve been worrying enough even if his next sentence wasn’t what I was expecting. “Why are all the instructors going rogue?”
“Excuse me, sir?”
He sighed, swiping his hat off his head and setting it down gently beside him before he rubbed tired-looking eyes.
“You know as well as I do that a lot of them haven’t been doing what they’re supposed to be doing.
Look at that incident with Robertson. Perkins’s daughter almost drowned because he wasn’t at his post. Since when do we run the kind of ship where it’s more important to get to a date than it is to do your damn job? ”
I swallowed. Shit, I knew that was going to come back to bite me in the ass. “I don’t know, sir. I made a complaint against him for it, but I haven’t had much feedback yet.”
“You were running that simulation,” he said firmly, bringing his gaze up to mine where I was still standing like an idiot behind my desk. “What was your assessment of the situation?”
“If I may speak freely, sir, Robertson was irresponsible and negligent in his duties. He nearly caused a serious incident on our Station and he still hasn’t been held accountable for it. If there are other instructors who are going rogue, it’s because of that.”
He sighed heavily, nodding his agreement as he hooked his ankle over one knee and leaned back.
“You can speak freely, but if it’s all the same to you, I’m going to do so myself.
If anything like that happens again, there will be serious consequences.
Bad things happen when instructors are undisciplined and it seems to be getting out of control. ”
“Which means people are going to get hurt,” I finished for him. “I got it, sir. This is a problem.”
“Yes,” he said, pressing his hands together with his fingers steepled toward the ceiling. “That’s why I’m here. We do indeed have a problem. What are you going to do about it?”
“Me?”
He nodded decisively. “Yes, you. Right now, you’re the only one I have complete faith in. In addition, these cadets are yours. It’s your responsibility to keep them safe, no matter the threat against them.”
“Yes, sir.” It truly was the appropriate response in this case.
“I’ll talk to them, but if we have a real problem, it may be necessary to make an example of Robertson.
The incident should have been punished more severely from the outset and now, it’s set a precedent.
If we continue to allow that to be the case, nothing I say will have much of an effect. ”
“Keep in touch with me.” He stood up and placed his hat back on his head. “If need be, we’ll bring him up. You’re right that the incident should have been punished more severely, but it wasn’t. It’s too late to bring him up arbitrarily, but should cause arise…”
He trailed off and I nodded. I understood what he wasn’t saying.
They couldn’t suddenly backpedal now if they didn’t have reason to.
Well, they could, but they wouldn’t. The rap to his knuckles had been punishment already.
If they tried to bring him up on charges now without anything having changed, they’d be opening a can of worms, which was always to be avoided if possible.
I sighed once he left, knowing that I had to go join the cadets for PT but also entirely unsure how to handle this situation with the instructors. I had to talk to them, but talking and listening were two entirely different things.
Although he hadn’t given me any more examples of how the instructors had gone rogue, the fact of it was that I’d gone rogue myself. Perhaps in the worst way possible, so once again, I was the official hypocrite of the hour.
Squeezing the back of my neck, I hung my head for a moment and breathed. Then I dropped my arm back to my side and got on with it. The training center was bustling with activity at this hour, but I didn’t acknowledge anyone I passed.
I was on a mission, and it wasn’t to make small talk about people’s weekends.
When I hit the obstacle course, however, that was exactly what I found my replacement doing with the cadets.
I stood on the side watching him for a moment, blinking when I saw him shooting the breeze with Jameson over which of them had had the better weekend.
As he moved down the line, the cadets relaxed little by little, opening up to him and seemingly enjoying the banter. When he got to Layla, I stepped forward to shut it down. “That’s enough of the questioning. It’s time to work.”
The cadets started when they heard my voice, spines straightening and jaws clamping. Their shoulders snapped back, their attention on me as I marched closer to the group. I sought Layla out of the crowd, seeing her hide her smile about me stepping in just when it was her turn to talk.
Since I couldn’t exactly stare openly at her, I swept my eyes on to the next cadet, but they were soon back on those twinkling green orbs. It was like I just couldn’t stop myself, but I still made a point of looking at some of the others before looking back at her.
None of them met my gaze directly, though, which made it easier to keep bringing it back to her without anyone realizing. As she stood there with that amused twinkle in her eyes, she sank her teeth into her lower lip and I almost groaned.
Knowing she was probably thinking about our weekend and everything we’d done was not doing me any favors.
Shifting my focus back to the group as a whole before I started sporting an erection for all to see, I took in the others and wondered why all the wheels seemed to be coming off with this particular group.
By the time I reached them, the relaxed atmosphere was gone and they’d shuffled into perfect formation.
Just how I like it.
“They did the run?” I asked my counterpart, hating that I even had to check.
Wilders was as dependable as they came, and yet I’d found him chatting to the cadets about their weekends instead of explaining what they needed to know about the day ahead. He seemed taken aback by my question. Then he nodded and clasped his hands together behind his back.
“We did five miles, then we circled back around the beach. I was just killing time until you got here.” He said the last sentence defensively, like he knew what I was thinking about his idle chit chat and felt the need to justify it.
“I understand, but they should’ve been warming up for the obstacle course.” I tried to keep my tone light, but his eyes flashed with indignation anyway.
Internally, I sighed but put the incident behind me as I turned back to the cadets. “The first group takes the course in three. What are you waiting for? The clock is ticking.”
They scattered immediately, dipping into stretches or squats while others hit the ground and spread their legs out in front of them.
For just one brief moment, I smiled. The wheels were coming off, but this group was shaping up.
They were doing exceptionally well and at least the drama with the instructors didn’t seem to be affecting them too much.
“They respect you,” Wilders commented quietly at my side. “As they should at this point. You’re doing a good job with them.”
“I’m doing my job with them,” I countered. “I like to think that I’m doing it well, but I don’t need a pat on the back. What I need is support from people who aren’t trying to be their friend.”
He let out a soft sigh. “They’re human. We don’t have to be like Perkins was. We can treat them well and gain their respect at the same time.”
“Perkins taught us how to stay alive. That’s all that matters. You don’t have to like the methods he used to know they worked. There will be plenty of time later to befriend them if you want to. For now, they need to learn what they need to know to graduate.”
He grimaced. “You know, everyone who came up under Perkins has mad respect for the guy, but no one likes him. I’m starting to think you might just end up being worse than he ever was.”
I shrugged. “So be it. Are you hitting the course with us?”
He shook his head. “Hell, no.”
Nodding as I glanced at him, I managed a tight smile. “Thanks for overseeing the run. I’ll catch you later.”
Realizing that he’d effectively been dismissed, he snapped his fingers to his forehead in a salute and then he was gone, leaving me to the job I had to do.
His words had hit home, though. I didn’t care about being liked.
I cared about the cadets graduating and surviving once they were done here at the Training Center.
At the same time, I didn’t want to be Perkins. I loved the man, but I’d never wanted to be exactly like he had been, and I definitely didn’t want to be worse.
Food for thought, that’s for sure. Now I just had to figure out what to do about it.