Chapter 35
Jake
The house smelled like roasted garlic and rosemary. It was still light outside, but the sun hung low in the evening sky. The sky was turning orange and cotton-candy pink on the edges. My dining room table was set for two. Soft music played through the house.
When I saw Ali walking up my back path toward my screen door, my heart skipped a beat. I never believed that was a thing outside of someone having a true medical, cardiac episode, but here I was feeling the flutter of . . . anticipation? Excitement? Happiness? Love?
It was all of it. I was sure of that now.
She stepped in through the back door and had barely kicked off her shoes before I grabbed her and kissed her just like I’d been waiting to do all day. My entire nervous system exhaled.
I wrapped my arms around her waist like I was anchoring her in time and space. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders, and it felt like she was doing the same for me.
This is it for me, my heart whispered. God, I loved this woman.
She moved her hands down my shoulders, and her fingers tangled in my shirt at my chest. Our need was the same.
After such an emotionally charged, complicated day, we both needed to sink into each other.
I could feel it in the pressure of her lips on mine and the way she sucked in air with every touch.
She needed to let her whole day melt away, and I supplied the fire to dissolve all the stress and exhaustion.
Dinner could wait. Conversation could wait. Declaring my feelings out loud could wait. For now, I would show her. Show her what my heart was screaming.
She tugged me over to the couch, never letting our lips part for more than the time it took to turn our heads.
I scooped her up in my arms and walked her to the cushions and laid her out, making sure she was comfortable.
Restraining myself because what I really wanted to do was bang her against every surface of this house, hard or soft.
I hoped I would have all the time in the world for that, though, after I told her how I felt about her and somehow convinced her to stay with me. Forever.
Right now, I wanted to make love to Ali gently. I wanted to soothe her, cradle her through her release. I undressed us slowly. Attentively. No need for words or commands. Just instinct and ease.
I settled behind her on the couch, with her back to my chest.
I slid my hand over her hip and let my fingers trace down to her navel. I tickled the skin as I moved my hand lower still. Dipping my fingers to her center. She sucked in a burst of air at my touch. I dotted light kisses on the side of her face, chin, neck.
“I missed you,” I whispered.
Her hips shuddered as my fingertips brushed her clit. I started gentle, but she begged me for more friction. I had no defense against Ali’s begging. I added pressure. I knew her body. I knew the rhythm she liked. Knew how to make it sing. Shake. Shatter.
Her hips moved against mine. Against my hardness. Her ass rubbing the length of my dick was enticing and almost made me forget what I was doing. Almost made me press her on her stomach and slam into her. Almost. But not yet.
We glided back and forth. Finding friction and gliding again.
I could tell her pleasure was building by the way she rocked against my hand with growing urgency.
I matched the way her hips moved, letting her feel what she was doing to me, but I was determined to take care of her needs in this moment.
“God, you are so beautiful, Ali,” I praised her.
My arm that was under her head reached down for her breast. I wanted to touch all her tender spots. She whimpered at the added sensation.
“I need you inside me,” she whispered. “Please.”
I pulled my hand away from her pussy to align myself with her opening from behind, then slid into her. She stretched around me. Once I was seated inside her, I replaced my hand to her front.
“Is that what you needed, baby?” I asked.
“Oh God, yes.”
We glided back and forth, her ass cheeks clenching and jiggling in time.
Her head lolled to the side, and she kissed the top of my biceps there.
I didn’t expect that spot to be so sensitive on my body, but it was, and as her teeth scraped against the tender flesh, I felt a surge of pleasure crawl down my body as well.
“You feel so good,” she purred. “You know exactly where to touch me.”
I could feel her orgasm building all around me.
I let my mouth find her ear and whispered, “Let go. I’ve got you.”
A second later, she did.
Her climax rolled through her body. I could feel it writhe down her spine and tremble through her hips. Her lips parted. Her fingers clenched the cushion. The sound of a swallowed scream eeped from her chest.
I held her tight through her entire ride, letting every flutter that moved through her body convulse into mine.
When she came back to herself and caught her breath, she rocked her hips away from me but not completely. Then she let herself clap back, taking me fully to my base again. I couldn’t control the moan that escaped.
“It’s your turn, Jake,” she said in a husky voice. “Let me make you feel good.”
One more clap back and I gave up trying to resist. I lifted her up and angled her over the back of the couch, her knees on the seat. I took a standing position behind her.
I reached down between her legs to feel her wetness and let her feel the head of my cock at her entrance.
“Can I fuck you like this? Is this okay? I won’t last long.”
“Yes. Fuck me and don’t let it be gentle,” she said with a look back at me over her shoulder.
I slammed into her and she cried out in pleasure. I moved aggressively in and out of her. She met me by arching her back and letting her backside lift. My fingers dug into her hips, holding on to the sides of her incredible ass. Watching it move back and forth made my dick harder.
“Your dick inside me is so good, Jake.” The sound of my name. Her moans. Feeling her all over my body. It was enough to send me over the edge.
A few more thrusts and I was done for.
We lay together on the couch again, this time wrapped into each other under a blanket. Tilted heads, soft kisses. The intimacy of our connection was deeper than I’d ever experienced.
Everything was different with Ali.
I was different with Ali.
Different and better. More myself than with anyone ever before.
“Ali. You’re incredible.” She was making soft circles with her finger on my chest. “I am so in love with you.” The movement of her hand stopped.
I cupped her chin with my hand and tilted her face so I could look into her eyes. “I love you, Ali.”
We stayed like that for a few beats. I wasn’t sure if she would say anything. I searched her face for some reaction. I said a silent prayer that it was reciprocal.
A tear fell from the corner of her eye. She broke the eye contact and sat up.
She stood and started to collect her clothes.
“Hey,” I whispered. “What are you doing?”
I caught her hand and pulled her back toward me. She paused half-dressed, looking down at me. A pained expression on her face. One I didn’t recognize.
“Jake.” She rubbed her face. Pushed her hair back. “You knew I never meant to stay here. I never intended to meet you. I’m so sorry I let it get this far.”
Let it get this far.
“Are you kidding me? Ali, I thought we were in this together.”
“I got caught up. I told you I was impulsive.”
It sounded rehearsed. A line fed to her from the wings.
She bunched up her shirt on her arms, ready to bring it over her head. Jerky movements.
“My dad and Kathy. They’ve been working together on holding GlennGlobal accountable. I stumbled into it when I found the environmental violations. I didn’t realize how deep it went.”
Her words came out fast. Flimsy. Detached.
“Turns out Dad cutting me off—Kathy making sure I got fired—it was for my protection. For my own good.”
My chest tightened. “They orchestrated that? They let you be humiliated like that and called it protection?”
She pushed on.
“Now they need me. They’re bringing me in.”
“How did they convince you that this is what you deserve?”
Silence.
“Jake, I got the green light to step back into my life in Chicago.” Her breath shook. “Does it really matter how? I get a fresh start.”
I pulled my jeans up and walked to the window. The lake was washed in orange. A beautiful sunset.
“What does this mean for us?” I asked, even though I thought I already knew the answer.
She stepped to my side. Shoulder to shoulder. Not touching. The distance agonizing.
“It means what it was always going to mean. I’m leaving. This was . . . amazing, but it was never going to last.”
Her voice cracked.
“You need someone stable. Someone who can build a life here with you.”
Tears ran freely now.
“I never meant to hurt you. I tried to warn you. I tried to stay away. I tried to safeguard both of us from pain. I failed.”
I felt my own tears fall.
“Don’t go.” It came out like a whisper. “Go to Chicago if you have to. Help them. But don’t leave us. We’re just getting started.”
“You’ll find someone who wants this life,” she said. “I know you will.”
We turned toward each other. She held my face in her hands and lifted on her tiptoes till our foreheads touched.
“It’s not me, Jake. I’m sorry.”
“It could be.” I could hear the desperation in my voice. “We can make it work.”
She closed her eyes.
“If we tried long distance, you would start to see I’m too much. I don’t want to mess this up. I want to remember us the way we are now. I want you to remember me the way you see me now.”
She pressed one last tear-filled kiss to my lips, then she pushed herself away from me, continued to gather her clothes, and walked to the door.
“Goodbye.” And she walked out.