Viral-ish
It begins with Arabella’s happy face filling the screen.
‘Hi guys, so our class are doing this London science contest this year, and we’ve chosen to discuss how the Pill affects us.
The winner gets funding for research and awareness of their chosen topic.
We wanted to do something that doesn’t get talked about a lot and is important to women.
’ She does a peace sign. Dance music begins to play and it cuts to the class preparing the presentation in my lab.
I appear next to the board, teaching them about the fallopian tube.
(How did Arabella film that?) It cuts to the day of the contest, with Arabella pulling a nervous face backstage.
The next clip is of Arabella, Ophelia and Beatrice presenting on stage in their tampon outfits.
It ends with Arabella on the Southbank, watery-eyed and saying that we lost. Then, it’s me doing my speech.
‘Whether in science or in life, keep questioning the world. The world needs your questions.’ It cuts back to Arabella.
‘You heard Miss Elman, the world needs your questions, girls!’
The video stops, and I immediately scroll to the comments expecting the worst, but to my surprise, they’re mostly positive.
This is so inspiring!!!!! #WeNeedYourQuestionsGirls
Elman for President!!
LOLOLOLOLOL LOVE THE TAMPON OUTFITS!
Fuck. How did you not win?!
What school is this??? Amazing.
Elman is a legend! #TEACHERGOALS
‘This is only the start of it,’ Nina says as she puts my dinner down, a full plate of chicken pesto pasta with a mountain of melted mozzarella. I don’t remember, but I must have told her this was my favourite meal at some point. ‘Dr Therone will want you back.’ She settles down opposite me.
She has laid the table like we’re in an Italian restaurant, with a gingham cloth and a dripping candle in an old wine bottle. I pierce one piece of pasta at a time. All I’ve had today is my Clapcake flapjack, but my stomach is stuffed with emotion that makes my appetite obsolete.
‘I won’t go back there. Josh has got his head of department role, and I .
. .’ I think of my lab, my fish. How they go crazy when Josh taps their tank.
I choke. Nina’s eyebrows dip as she reaches her hand towards me.
I wave her away and dab my eyes with the matching gingham napkin. ‘Sorry,’ I say. ‘I’m fine.’
‘Could be cold feet, maybe?’ Nina says gently.
I shake my head.
‘No, this is it,’ I say.
Nina gets up from the table with a smile. ‘I have something that will cheer you up.’ She leaves the room and comes back a moment later with her laptop. On the desktop is a folder called THE THERONE TAKEDOWN, and it’s full of audio files.
‘What on earth . . .’ I ask.
‘Just something I’ve been working on behind the scenes.’
She clicks on a file named Assembly_StupidWoman_Feb25.mp3 and turns up the volume. Dr Therone’s voice comes out of the speakers.
‘You are a stupid, stupid woman, I told you not to do any more of these woke assemblies of yours. If you do it one more time, I swear I’ll . . .’ Nina hits the space bar and smiles.
‘That’s one clip of evidence where she is being a bully in the workplace, and I have 10 more like it,’ she says, and then adds, ‘If I can’t be head of the department, she can’t be head of the school.’ She slams her laptop lid down. ‘The beast is going down.’