Chapter 5
Chapter Five
Angela and I had a delicious lunch at Charlie’s Diner. On our drive home, she told me how much she enjoyed meeting Pop, Lucky, and Goldie. “They’re so supportive and friendly,” she said. “I can definitely see how they helped you through a difficult time.”
“I don’t think I’ll ever forget the darkness I felt back then, but I kept busy, and they prevented me from wallowing, at least while I was at work. Late at night, though, I’d go to my blog and cry with my subscribers about the memories we’d share.”
“Did that help you?”
“I suppose so, at least for a while. Eventually, I decided to focus on the positive so we could find peace. That helped a lot.”
“Do you ever check in with the group?”
I nodded, smiling. “There are over two thousand followers now, yet people have come and gone. The lady who took over for me is still leading the group, so I pop in every once in a while.”
“Did you tell them about your upcoming wedding?”
“No, but I told them about Brad, and the car bombing that killed his wife and daughter. I included the fact that he decided to leave the military afterwards because that shows the type of guy he is.”
“I understand your point, but what would that mean to the grievers?”
“He and his best buddy, Shawn McNally, joined the service together and planned a lifetime as career officers. Brad ended up leaving the military to prevent attacks on other personnel.”
“Yet Shawn didn’t make it back at all.”
“I know,” I said softly.
I cried for Brad whenever I thought about Shawn. His dear friend would have been his Best Man at our wedding, and I wished I’d known him. His father, Jim McNally, had rented the fire hall for our wedding reception, which made me feel as if the past had connected all of us.
Angela may have noticed my sudden gloom, so she changed the subject. “Are you ready for Harrisburg?”
“I think so. I’ll visit the Capitol Complex and the National Civil War Museum, then have lunch somewhere interesting.”
“Do you want company?”
“Yes, but I need to do this on my own.”
She paused a moment. “I know you’re trying to overcome a fear, so I won’t offer to join you even though I could. My kids are in school and I have nothing planned.”
“I appreciate that, and I’m not trying to be stubborn. I just sense that it’s important for me to take this step.”
She nodded slowly. “Is your fear tied to Tony’s death?”
I turned to stare at her, though she continued to drive. Had she just hit a nerve? “Why would you think that?” I asked.
“Maybe because I’d feel awkward going somewhere without Mike. Gosh, we’ve been married for almost eighteen years, and we travel together if we ever get the chance. I don’t know if I’d want to go by myself.”
The way she put it brought everything into perspective.
Prior to my first marriage, I’d been an independent person and never minded traveling alone.
After Tony and I married, we went everywhere together—and then he died.
Angela’s words made me realize I wasn’t afraid to travel.
Rather, my brain thought I should be going to places with my husband and son.
It suddenly made sense. “Wow! I have to do this in order to show myself that I don’t need to lean on someone else.”
Angela hesitated. “I’m not sure that’s what I meant.”
I laughed. “It doesn’t matter because it’s now clear to me. I’ll test my new conjecture tomorrow, then report back. If I can do this, I can go anywhere.”
At the stop sign, she turned to look at me. “I’m glad I was able to help.”
I grinned. “Me, too.”
Angela pulled in next to my car at the back door of my apartment and popped the trunk. “This was a fun day, and I’m glad I had your company. I guess the next outing will involve shopping for shoes.”
I smiled. “Probably, though if we see the perfect pair on our own, we should buy them. Right?”
“Of course, but you need my approval since I’m the Matron of Honor,” she teased. We both laughed when she added, “You’re not wearing glitzy sneakers for your wedding.”
“They’d be so much more comfortable,” I countered with a giggle, then retrieved my dress bag and hat box from the trunk. I closed it before saying my farewell. “I’ll call you during my drive to the shore on Friday.”
“Sounds good,” she said, pressing the ignition. “I’ll see you soon.”
I glanced at the kitchen clock as I made my way down the hall to put my new wedding gown and headpiece in the guest room closet.
I’d already decided that Brad and I would have to go out or order delivery for supper, because I didn’t intend to cook.
I still needed to finalize my Harrisburg plans and email my itinerary to Elsa Kroger.
I expected her to once again remind me to widen my vistas, or some such thing, yet I didn’t really care. This trip was for me; not the magazine.
Just as I clicked to send my travel plans, my phone dinged with a text from Brad. How’s the Bistro sound for dinner?
I texted back: Perfect.
He wrote: Pick u up at 6.
I sent him a thumbs up emoji just before receiving a call from Elsa.
“Harrisburg?” she questioned. “What’s that about?”
“I’m testing a new idea,” I said lamely. The tone in her voice made me question whether I should bother explaining.
She sighed audibly. “I don’t know if I can get approval for you to take a trip to Harrisburg, especially at this late date. What kind of interest will that generate among our women readers?”
“There’s a Civil War Museum,” I replied hesitantly.
“Jodie, Jodie, Jodie…” She paused, then said, “I’ll approve, but make it good.”
“You can count on it,” I assured her.
We chatted a few minutes, mostly about my upcoming wedding, and I had the impression she blamed my short travel trip on my impending marriage. I didn’t bother to correct her.
By the time we disconnected, I heard the sound of Brad’s workers returning and knew he’d soon arrive to pick me up. I scurried to freshen my makeup, reminding myself that his three college student interns no longer lived upstairs, so I didn’t have to contend with heavy footsteps above me.
I didn’t miss the noise, yet thought about the unused space in the building. We had four empty rooms and a bathroom on the second floor and, once I moved in with Brad, we’d also have an apartment off the back of the store.
I’d analyzed his August financial report and knew he’d lost money letting the three guys from Lancaster live there rent-free.
I could say the same about me living in the apartment at no charge.
He figured his generosity could be a tax deduction and it served as an alternative to higher pay for his workers.
I agreed with his concept, especially since the upstairs was dated, with no kitchen or laundry facilities. In addition, the steps were accessed from inside the store, which posed a security issue. Those problems would have to be rectified before he could charge rent.
We’d spoken a few times about renovating, but we needed to figure out a way to make it happen. For now, though, I grabbed my purse and headed out to meet Brad.