Chapter 22
Twenty-Two
Lily
I woke up in the cocoon of Eliot’s arms. It was Christmas morning. Uncle Darren had been correct. It’d taken the kids forever to unwrap all the gifts from my parents. By the time they were done, Cali’s eyes were drooping, and Kellan was trying to crawl into anyone’s lap he could to go to sleep. Eliot said they could save his gifts for today. My parents were at the motel in Coal Haven. They’d be at the Christmas party Aggie and Ansen were throwing.
There was a frantic knock on the bedroom door. “Mom!” Cali whisper-shouted. “Santa came!”
The strong arm around me twitched. “I guess that means no time for frisky business before Santa’s presents,” Eliot grumbled into the back of my neck.
“You already unwrapped me last night.”
He slid his hand down to my thigh where my shorts had ridden up. “You’re halfway there. I wouldn’t have taken long.”
Another knock. “Mom!”
“We’ll be right out,” I called back. Just how quick could he be? No. It was Christmas. I wasn’t making my daughter wait so I could get an orgasm.
“What if we don’t have time before I leave?” He pressed a kiss into my hair.
Warmth was kindling in my belly. There would be no fanning of those flames today. I wasn’t having a quickie at his sister’s place, and he was driving separately to Aggie’s and leaving from there. With the impending storm and his staffing already short for the holiday, he didn’t want to risk getting stranded.
I reached behind me and stroked my hand down the front of his shorts, loving the way his erection twitched as soon as I touched him. “Then you’ll have to call me later tonight.”
Eliot groaned and rolled up. “You’re a menace. I’ll drive too fast knowing your moans are waiting for me.”
Grinning, I got out of bed and dressed. I couldn’t finish without looking over my shoulder to catch a glimpse of his muscled back. He shrugged into an olive-green, long-sleeved shirt.
Kellan was making noises by the time we exited the bedroom. Cali sprinted to the living room. I cleaned up in the bathroom and Eliot made a bottle, then I got Kellan and dropped onto the couch. Eliot took his turn cleaning up.
Cali pushed a little pile of presents by my feet. One was a hand-decorated gift bag with her gift for me from school. She claimed it was for both me and Eliot.
She grinned as he appeared from the hallway. “Open mine first.”
He sat next to me. I had a wiggly baby who was almost as interested in his bottle as everything else, but I couldn’t take my eyes off Eliot’s finger-combed hair and the way his dark whiskers dusted his jaw. I’d gotten to feel those between my thighs last night.
I tucked my feet under his butt and enjoyed the little smile he sent my way.
Cali dropped the gift bag on his lap.
Eliot held it and studied her drawings on the outside. “You sure you want me to be the one to open this masterpiece?”
She nodded.
He glanced at me, a question in his eyes, more like he was searching for approval. I nodded at him. “She’s been so excited for you to see it.”
I didn’t know what it was, but her giddiness about it had amplified my curiosity.
He dug through the tissue paper and withdrew a mass of brown paper towels. “Just what I needed to dry my hands,” he said.
She giggled. “No, it’s inside.” She was standing right in front of him, practically jumping from foot to foot.
He peeled off a taped-together wad of towels to reveal a red Christmas tree ornament. On the shiny surface were names. Mine. Cali’s. Kellan’s. And the one that Eliot kept staring at—his.
“That’s gorgeous,” I gushed, keeping an eye on his reaction. I loved the handmade craft just as much as I loved seeing all our names written together like a real family. As much as the ornament satisfied me, a spark of worry started that maybe this whole plan was wrong. Cali was going to get attached. Eliot and I had something real, but what if he never acknowledged it? What if he rejected the possibility?
It was Christmas. I couldn’t handle those heavy thoughts today. It was the season of hope, right?
His expression was passive, but several emotions played through his eyes: genuine affection and pride, then a hint of fear that morphed into dismay. Maybe some panic?
“Thank you, Cali,” he said stiffly. “It’s really nice.”
No “boss lady”? A low simmer of hurt started in my chest. He wasn’t used to kids bringing home presents like this. Was that why he was so wooden, or did he have the same concern over Cali’s attachment as I had?
“Mrs. Beeker said to write our whole family’s name on it.” Cali’s grin was huge.
Eliot’s brows lifted. “Yeah? It’s really nice.” Again, his voice was aloof, a little detached.
If only I could know what he was thinking. Would I want to?
He gave me a tight smile. “Want to see it?” He gingerly handed it over, like he was afraid to damage it.
“It’s so cute, Cali.” I looked over her meticulous letters before handing it to her. “Can you put it on the tree for us?”
She picked a special spot in the middle of the tree. Eliot’s gaze was on the floor, but when she turned, he shot her a bright smile. “Ready to open mine?”
The optimism of the morning had dimmed. I’d gone into Christmas morning like Cali, thinking we were a family. Eliot had drawn his line. Would he ever cross it? Did he want to but was scared? Chambers’s insight ran through my head. Did Eliot think he didn’t deserve this?
He was here. It was Christmas morning. He’d decided to come and celebrate with us. We were going to Aggie’s later with his family. Eliot would meet his two nephews and niece. Could my concerns from Thanksgiving be unfounded?
A small pool of uncertainty filled my stomach. Just because I wanted us to be together, and I thought Eliot deserved all the happiness in the world, didn’t mean he agreed. I couldn’t make that decision for him.
Cali tore off the candy cane wrapping on her gift. “Horses!” The box had a horse family inside—a mare, a stallion, and two ponies, along with a stable that could be snapped together and some picket fence segments for her to make pastures with.
A knot inside my chest loosened. A family-themed gift. I was overthinking. I nudged Eliot with my foot. “You chose well.”
“Thanks.” His eyes warmed when he looked at me, and he held his hands out for Kellan. “Time for the champ’s gift.”
Cali pushed another candy-cane-wrapped box toward the couch. I helped Kellan to the floor and he immediately started scratching at the paper like he’d seen his sister do.
“Go ahead and give him a hand,” I said to Cali.
Kellan’s horse set was more robust, made for babies who put everything in their mouths.
“You got a horse family too!” Cali said.
If I didn’t have my toes tucked under Eliot’s ass, I wouldn’t have felt him stiffen. Yet, when he looked at me and said, “Your turn,” he acted normal.
My anxiety rose, but I squashed it. It was Christmas and I wouldn’t tear myself apart with questions when I didn’t have answers.
His present to me was a small box, but it wasn’t jewelry small. I wasn’t a jewelry girl. I peeled off the paper. “Either you’re really good at wrapping, or you found someone who was.”
His smile was the first natural one I’d seen since we started opening gifts. “I paid to have them look pretty.”
Inside was a petite carved horse. Not just any horse, but a gorgeous chestnut Arabian.
I held it up, inspecting the intricate features. “Is this one of Jasper’s carvings?”
He nodded. “I saw him doing one and asked if I could commission him.”
On the side was a laser inscription of the day we married.
All my insecurities vanished. He’d put our wedding date permanently on the gift he gave me. Unlike the ornament Cali made, this horse wasn’t breakable. I was touched and so damn relieved. I ran my fingers over the cool, smooth surface. “Eliot, it’s gorgeous.”
“You like it?”
“I love it.” I turned the date toward him and smiled.
He lifted a shoulder. “Figured you’d have something to remember me by.”
My world skidded to a stop. Just as I was thinking the carved date signified the beginnings of a legitimate commitment instead of a responsibility, Eliot produced a shiny pin to burst that bubble.
He was right. I’d never forget him.