14. Chapter Fourteen #2
As she ate, Mabel kept a close eye on Felicity and her occasional interaction with Ted who was very properly dividing his attention between Felicity and her grandmother.
Freddy was brilliant at keeping the conversation going, and Mabel appreciated the lightness of his touch, and his ability to bring the best out of everyone except his brother.
It was an endearing quality he shared with Colin.
Whom she loved to pieces.
A piece of potato fell off her fork and rolled into the centre of the table where it came to rest right in front of the dowager countess.
“Sorry about that.” Mabel shot to her feet, speared the potato, and sat back down, her cheeks bright red as the enormity of what she’d just admitted to herself hit her. “It just got away from me.”
“Perhaps if you used your knife and fork in harmony, you might have anchored it to your plate better, dear,” the dowager said. “The American style of eating with only a fork does have its limits.”
Now everyone was looking at her, and Mabel had to decide what to do about the rogue potato that had gathered a coating of dust and cat hair on its adventure across the tablecloth. She couldn’t put it back in the bowl or on the side of her plate in case she accidentally ate it.
“Here.” Freddy handed her his handkerchief. “Pop it in there and I’ll give it to one of the dogs in the kitchen.”
She did as he suggested. “You really are the best.”
Mabel ate the rest of her meal as quietly as possible and wondered where Colin had gone. She tried texting him but received no reply. After another half an hour passed, she did a quick search and then headed back to the dower house.
She found him sitting in the kitchen at the table with a cup of tea beside him.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
“Not particularly.” He looked up at her, his expression uncharacteristically grim. “You probably think I’m an emotional fool.”
“Why would I think that?” She sat beside him.
“Because I was upset about the idea of disturbing my mother’s memories while the job had already been done by countess’s two and three.”
“Freddy did say that a lot of the things ended up in the attic, so you could—”
He talked over her. “She also said that Eric knew, and of course, he took advantage of it.” He shook his head. “And no one thinks the worst of him for doing so.”
“Perhaps that’s because he’s dead,” Mabel suggested as she realized that perhaps this wasn’t about his mom after all. “People tend to be kinder about people who are no longer with us.”
“Eric could do no wrong in life or in death.”
“What makes you say that?” Mabel held his gaze.
“I’m sure you know the answer. Everyone’s probably told you that I killed him.”
“Did you?”
He frowned. “Of course I bloody didn’t.”
“Okay, I believe you.” Mabel sat back and crossed her arms. “Now tell me why everyone believes that you did.”
Colin let out a breath. “It’s complicated.”
“And I’m a smart woman.” She held his gaze until he sighed and looked down at his mug.
“Okay. Eric came home for Christmas after his first term at Cambridge and he treated us all appallingly. He’d never been particularly nice to us, but he was much worse—belittling Felicity, physically intimidating Freddy…
” He frowned. “I tried my best to protect them, but he just wouldn’t stop, and of course my father wouldn’t listen to a word against him. ”
“Eric sounds like a jerk,” Mabel said. “So, what happened?”
“Father and his new wife were out at some Christmas party and Eric helped himself to a bottle of the best brandy. He was reeling drunk and behaving aggressively.” Colin’s grip on his mug tightened.
“He wanted to go out on the lake. I told him that was a stupid idea because the lake was partially frozen.
He hated being told anything and after telling me to fuck off, he headed for the boathouse that used to be down by the lake.
I followed because I felt responsible for him and found him putting on a pair of old skates.
I told him it was a bad idea, and he punched me in the face.
” Colin grimaced. “He literally knocked me off my feet. By the time I’d recovered he’d gone outside and set off on the lake.
It wasn’t completely frozen and he went down in the water.
” Colin paused. “I can still hear the creak and groan of the ice before it cracked. He just disappeared into the dark. I remember yelling and running around the lake to see if I could find him, but it was impossible. I rang 999 and asked for help and tried to get out on the ice myself, but it was so fragile I had to come back.”
Mabel reached across the table and took his hands in hers.
“I called Mrs. Reynolds and, got some of the staff out to help me search, and then I just waited for the emergency services to arrive. It was freezing cold and I was wet through, but I stayed until they found him.” He looked up at Mabel. “He drowned almost instantly.”
“I’m so sorry,” Mabel said.
“When Father got home, he absolutely lost it. He berated me for not saving Eric, said I was a coward, and he walked away and hardly spoke to me for the next year. He wouldn’t even allow me home from school in the holidays because he said the sight of me made him sick.”
Mabel had a sudden desire to find the earl and punch him.
“I suppose that’s when I realized that no one cared what I did, so why should I care?” He tried to smile. “And the rest, as they say, is history. At least my father has accepted me again.”
Mabel breathed out hard.
“What’s wrong?” Colin asked.
“Did your grandmother and siblings stand up for you?”
“I don’t know. I was locked in my room until Mr. Reynolds drove me back to school.”
“No one ever told you that it wasn’t your fault?”
He shook his head,
“I… just want to shake them all! How dare they blame you for your older brother’s stupid death wish!”
“It’s all right. Everyone was grieving and in shock.”
“No, it bloody isn’t!” She glared at him. “If any of them ever repeat that crap about you being responsible for that idiot’s death, I am going to set them straight once and for all.”
“That’s very sweet of you, but—”
“No buts! I’m going to kick some ass. How dare they blame a sixteen-year-old boy?”
“Darling Mabel, I’m so glad I’ve got you in my corner,” Colin said. “Because when you lose your temper, you’re really something.”
“Well.” She met his gaze. “Just remember this. Eric was responsible for his own choices, you were not, and you should never feel guilty about how you behaved.”
“I know that now, but somehow I’ll always feel like I could’ve done more.”
“You did everything you could,” Mabel said firmly.
Colin suddenly stood up, bringing her with him. “Would you mind terribly if I took you to bed? I must confess that I find your anger on my behalf incredibly arousing.”
Mabel was already laughing as he pursued her up the stairs and into their bedroom.
Much later, Mabel’s cell buzzed as she and Colin lay in bed. She’d been unenthusiastically checking her email, and he'd been reading a book about barn conversions.
She picked up her phone and saw a text from Dale.
Hey, I know it’s short notice, but I can come up and see you this weekend?
Mabel nudged Colin. “Would you be okay if my friend Dale, the location manager, visited with us over Freddy’s birthday weekend?”
“It’s fine by me. The more the merrier.”
Mabel texted back.
That would be great! I’ll book you into the pub B&B.
Looking forward to it. I’ll be there around midday on Saturday x.