Chapter 14
Surrounded by the dark chill of night, I slip her glasses into my pocket and cup her cold cheeks.
Our breath creates a soft veil between us as her coat brushes against mine like the quiet rustle of leaves.
I lean in slowly, being careful with her after last night.
But Lexie isn’t tentative—at all. The second our mouths meet, her eyes flutter closed, and her lips part.
She eagerly gives me her tongue, sliding it against mine—warm, wet, and tasting so fucking good. Like brandy, coffee, and sex.
Desire flares hot and fast, starting in my chest and spreading lower.
I’ve never craved anyone this much—not just her body, but all of her.
My hands travel from her cheeks, slowly drifting down her neck, feeling her pulse trip beneath my thumbs.
Her moans vibrate against my mouth. The woman I’m holding, who thinks she’s sexually broken, is a firebrand in my arms.
Her hands move restlessly at the nape of my neck and shove into my hair as we feed each other long, lusty kisses.
She moves against me, seeking, wanting. It’s all I can do not to rip open her coat and fill my hands with her supple, round breasts.
I now know the soft weight of them in my palms, the texture of her nipples, and how hard they get when stroked.
Through the haze of arousal, I somehow remember where we are—right in front of my family’s house.
I catch her bottom lip between my teeth and return my hands to her cheeks before inching back, struggling to catch my breath.
She blinks those dark blue eyes up at me.
Desire, like an electrical field, crackles around us.
“I didn’t want to stop,” I murmur.
The soft glow of the porch lights plays over her face, revealing a flicker of surprise at her own heated reaction. “It’s good you had the presence of mind to pull away.”
“Barely,” I admit. Lexie Monroe makes it hard to breathe—hard to think. She makes me lose my mind. Knowing she was just as lost in the moment—even when she didn’t think it was possible—sets something off in me.
“I should go.” She nods toward her idling car.
“Night, Lex.” I slide her glasses back on and hug her tight, like I’m trying to absorb her into my skin.
Reluctant to let me go, too, her hands linger on the nape of my neck. “Night,” she sighs.
“Drive safe and text when you get home.”
“I will.” She brushes her lips over mine once more before stepping back, leaving her imprint behind.
I feel it there as I watch her slip into her car and drive off, her taillights fading into the night.
A chill settles into all the places our bodies touched.
I’ve never believed in instalove. Deep emotions develop and evolve over time.
They don’t hit you like a power kick. This thing with Lexie?
I haven’t been able to explain it in rational terms. I just know my world feels fuller when she’s around and emptier when she’s not.
Back inside the house, I shrug off my coat and head to the kitchen, taking a beat before rejoining the chatter in the family room. That’s where Dice finds me, wearing that knowing look of his. “You got it bad, bro.”
“Yep.” No point in denying the obvious.
He grabs two beers from the fridge, pops the tops, and hands me one. “I like her,” he says, taking a seat across from me. “She’s smart, classy, and fine as hell.”
“But?”
“You already know. That’s why you’re sittin’ here by yourself.”
“You think I’m falling too fast?”
“Among other things.”
“Like what?”
“She’s a rich, white, city girl, C. You’re out here on a snowmobile, and she’s rolling up in a top-of-the-line Mercedes Maybach. I don’t gotta tell you what that runs, straight back to her privileged life in Chicago.”
“She can’t help where she comes from,” I say sharply, remembering her worries from last night about being perceived that way.
“We haven’t really talked about race yet, but she showed awareness in the diverse books she bought for Sophia.
Her friends and their partners are either Black or multi-racial.
That doesn’t necessarily make her enlightened, but it says something that the people closest to her look like me. ”
“That’s valid,” Dice agrees, but isn’t quite sold. “You still don’t know her, C, not really. I mean, she didn’t even wanna date you, and now she suddenly does.”
“Lexie was being cautious at first, but we’ve been spending every day together, getting close. Feelings developed.”
“Maybe that’s true, but what’s gonna happen when she packs up in a couple of weeks and leaves?” He pauses, then strikes a nerve. “It’ll be like Olivia all over again.”
“Fuck, Dice.” I lurch forward, slamming the chair’s front legs down with a thud.
“Olivia wanted out of here, out of this town. She wanted an exciting, glamorous life I couldn’t give her.
Lexie already has all that—everything money can buy.
But she’s here, rejecting it, trying to make her own way, even with her parents shutting her out. There’s no comparison.”
“My bad.” He raises his palms. “I’m not tryna burst your bubble, C, but we always keep it real with each other. What if she realizes she doesn’t want to give up that life? What then?”
I scrub a hand over my face, sorting through the tangle in my head.
After the way my father was worked into an early grave by a man who cared more about profits over people, I’ve avoided dating women with wealth.
I don’t know exactly how rich Lexie is. I’ve gathered that she’s several galaxies outside my orbit. But . . .
She doesn’t act like it. She’s never flaunted her money or behaved as if she was entitled to anything because of privilege.
She appreciates the little things—making snow angels, a picnic at the lighthouse, my latte art.
It feels genuine. Tonight, I watched her soak up the warmth of my family as if it was something special, like something she’s been missing.
My gut tells me I’m right about her—but I’m not delusional either.
“I can’t predict what’ll happen,” I say, taking a pull of beer.
“I’m being real with myself, though. While raising Sophia, I couldn’t just rush into relationships.
I had to protect her, and I was probably protecting myself too.
This thing with Lexie, the speed of it caught me off guard.
But I’m going all in instead of playing it safe. ”
Dice swirls the beer in his bottle, contemplative, his face taking on that serious pinched expression.
“I’ll never forget what you went through, C.
You had to be a parent and a brother when you were just a kid.
Everything you did was for Soph, no cap.
I’m glad to see you’re ready to live your own life now.
But why put yourself in a situation where the odds are against you? ”
“Look, after losing my dad and then Moms . . .” My throat tightens, the memories squeezing it. “I know what life can take from you. I know putting my heart out there comes with risks.”
“I feel that.” Dice punches the left side of his chest. “You know, whatever happens, I got your back, C. I’m just saying, keep it casual. Have some fun. Why you gotta go all out?”
“That’s like asking Usain Bolt why he didn’t hang back instead of going full force.”
“So, you Usain Bolt now?”
“Just making my point. I want her too much to hold back. Period. And one day, you’re gonna to see what I mean.”
“Dawg, you tripping.”
“Bet it happens. Some woman’s gonna domesticate your playa ass, and you won’t know what hit you.”
“Man . . .” He sucks his teeth. “I’ll take that bet.”
“Oh yeah? Then, put up your grail. Uncanny X-Men, #118 from 1979. Even Wolverine couldn’t buck the feels for Mariko Yashida.”
“Logan got soft. That ain’t me.”
“All right, bro. Big talk.”
“And I’ll be walking it. Uncanny X-Men.” He extends his hand. “I ain’t never goin’ down.”
“Hm-mm,” I say as our palms smack, sealing the deal. “Famous last words.”
It’s after eleven when I get home. Lazing on my bed in sweatpants and nothing else, I check my phone. Our messages from an hour ago stare back at me.
Lex: Arrived safe. Thank you and your family again for tonight.
Chaz: We loved having you. Sweet dreams. xo
She’d hearted the message but hadn’t responded further.
What was she doing, I wonder? Listening to music?
Watching TV? Was she in bed? I’m trying my damnedest not to call.
I understand her social tank is different from mine.
She needs to unwind and reset after interacting with a bunch of people.
I thrive on the energy of others; it’s why I like performing and working in the café.
But being with Lexie brings a quieter energy that fills me emotionally.
I scroll through my phone, pausing on one of the few pics she’d let me take of her—our first non-date at the lighthouse.
Her dark blue eyes are bright with excitement behind her glasses, her hair wind-blown across her cheeks, and her lush mouth curved into a shy smile as if embarrassed by my attention.
You got it bad is an understatement.
Too wired to sleep, I grab my maple Taylor off its stand.
The smaller neck makes the lead work silky smooth, which is perfect for tonight.
Sophia’s in the basement with the Beyhive, celebrating her birthday with a late-night party, so I don’t need to play softly; I just do.
With gentle strums and delicate fingerpicking, the piece that flows out of me is tender and soulful, like pillow talk echoing through the room.
I give space between the chords for the song to breathe and build slowly. It’s more sensual that way.
When I have it timed the way I like, I record the audio and send it to Lexie.
Chaz: New material in progress. Still needs lyrics. Let me know what you think.
I don’t expect to hear from her until the morning, though I’m hopeful. Fifteen minutes later, my phone pings.