Chapter 11
CHAPTER ELEVEN
The past two days had been a mix of strange highs and lows.
Highs: the fact she was starting to feel like she and Andy were becoming friends.
Lows: the fact she was starting to feel like she and Andy would only ever be friends.
After a few too-long looks, he seemed to have settled back into polite distance, which was frustrating to say the least. Especially when he was leaving so soon.
She had begged Rory and Aidan and Mam to not say anything about her teaching course. Not after the way they had blatantly tried to set her up. Irrational it may be, she didn’t want him to think she’d chosen that career because of him. She had no desire to be pitied any more than she was already.
But their non-dates, or casual outings together, had resulted in another trip to O’Shea’s last night for a meal, accompanying Rory and Aidan again, with Mam along too.
And still she remained in this place of wondering.
Wondering whether she had been mistaken about that ripple of awareness she had experienced on their first encounter, or whether that had been mistaken.
For surely if Andy was the man who was supposed to be hers in some gigantic heavenly arrangement ordained by God, then he should feel something towards her too.
But it seemed the more she tried to smile at and engage with him the more he pulled away.
Nerves rippled through her. He was leaving the day after tomorrow. Then what? If he was the one, the man she was supposed to be with, then how could he leave her without saying anything? That wasn’t right.
But she also sensed that she wasn’t supposed to push.
She didn’t want to throw herself at him, especially not after the way Rory and Aidan had practically done exactly that.
Which left her hesitant about how to behave.
Flirtatious? Sometimes. Aloof? Sometimes that too.
Maybe it was as confusing for him as it was for her, but she didn’t know how to behave.
She did sense that he needed a friend, and she was happy to be that too. Be a cheerleader, be an encourager, be someone he wanted to see instead of wanting to avoid.
And she would just have to trust God that whatever happened in the future, that if this truly was of God, and part of the Fairall legacy, then God would somehow orchestrate it for good. Just as He seemed to have with Colin and Kara, and Rory and Aidan.
“Andy, it’s been nice to meet you.” Aidan held out his hand.
“You too.”
Aisling watched as Rory bit her lip, her eyes hungry on her fiancé who was leaving so soon.
The fact that they’d spent time together with her and Andy meant a lot.
Like they were invested in seeing Aisling and Andy together so they treated them as couple friends.
Even though there was only one real couple involved.
But maybe, please God, one day there could be two.
“I hope you’ll stay in touch,” Aidan said. “Be great if you can make it for the wedding.”
Andy blinked. “I, uh, don’t want to presume.”
“Oh, there’s no presuming.” Aidan winked at Aisling, which sure felt like a presumption to her.
“Then, uh, sure. If I can. Have a good trip.”
“Thanks.” Aidan hugged Aisling. “See ya, Ash.”
“Bye, best brother-in-law to-be,” she replied.
He hugged Mam, then hopped in the car with Rory, who was driving him to the airport. The long way, apparently, which was why they were leaving early. Of course, considering how far Ireland was from his corner of Australia then “long way” was only relative.
“Which airport is he going from?” Andy asked.
“Cork,” Mam said.
“Oh. If I’d known, I could have…” Andy’s voice trailed away.
Nope. She had deliberately not looked up where he lived.
She thought it must be near Cork, but she wasn’t going to be so needy as to hunt up his address.
That way stalker vibes lay. And she knew herself, knew that she likely had some stalker-like tendencies within, and it really wasn’t trusting God if she insisted on doing things herself.
And she didn’t want to accidentally discover herself parked outside his house one day, or his school. That would certainly not end well.
“Well! Last day here.” She pasted on a smile, not wanting to show to how much Andy’s departure was going to affect her. “What are you going to do today? Do you have anything else you’d regret if you missed doing it?”
“I can’t think of anything. I’ve run all the trails, I’ve done all the activities.”
“You tried wild swimming, then?”
“Apart from that.”
“Well it’s not for everyone. Only the very brave.”
He chuckled. “Have you been?”
“Yes.” And once was definitely enough. But at least she’d been.
“Would you come with me if I tried it?”
He wanted to spend time with her? Oh, she was so tempted to say yes. “I have to work today. I’m covering Rory’s shift.”
“Like the good sister you are.”
“Like the good sister I am,” she agreed.
But the fact he wanted to spend time with her had to be a good thing, right? And seeing she couldn’t today, maybe she could make the most of tonight. “What about another round of karaoke?” she suggested.
His eyes lit. “That’s on tonight?”
“Sure is. Every Saturday, after the live band.”
“You’re going?”
“I thought it’d be fun. Especially if there was someone who would be fun to sing with. You know, who can actually sing.” She winked. “A little bit, at least.”
“Did you really mean to imply I can only sing a little bit?”
“Did I imply?” Oh banter was too easy with him.
“Now I think on it, I feel like it was definitely more than just an imply. That comment hit me in the jugular.”
She laughed, and he smiled too. And again she felt that sense of connection. A sense of connection that God was going to have to somehow foster. How could she let this man go whom she really felt attracted to?
“Well, seeing it’s my last night…”
Why did he not seem perturbed by that like she was?
“I might be persuaded to go there too.”
Good! She aimed for cool. “That’d be grand. And seeing it’s a popular night, you might want to get there early for dinner, and to enjoy the band.”
“I might, might I?”
She nodded. “Just to make sure you have a proper good time.”
“In that case, count me in.”
She beamed. Oh, she might be getting ahead of herself, but she’d squeeze every second of enjoyment in spending as much time as possible with him.
And if that meant dinner then karaoke, then church tomorrow morning, then maybe lunch as well, well then she was completely okay with that.
And if that meant choosing a song that might say something of how she felt, then that might be good too.
And she’d do her best to make sure he was happy too, and realise that somehow they would need to keep in touch.
* * *
“Did you enjoy that now?” Their waitress smiled at Andy as she cleared their plates.
“It was delicious, thanks.”
“And you, Ash?”
“You know I think O’Shea’s make the best apple crumble around.”
“Well, you’ll know where to come when you’re next in town,” the waitress said, stacking their plates.
Aisling glanced at him, lips pressed together, before she returned her attention to the band.
His heart tipped a little, wondering what she was thinking. He was fairly sure that expression must mean that she liked him, but sometimes she’d simply revert to tease so he was never very sure. He was sure that they were becoming friends, though, which was something at least.
Grady had called, and Andy had confessed about the last few days, before Grady had reminded him to make the most of the time left and kiss Aisling.
He’d protested—he wasn’t going to kiss a woman because of a dare—but still dared wonder what it would be like.
His time in west Kerry was fast speeding to a close, and yet once again he found himself caught in shifting emotions.
He really wished he hadn’t answered Grady’s call.
He peeked at her again across their small table.
Her gaze was on the Irish band, the traditional instrumentalists playing the bodhran, fiddle and tin whistle, and those who were singing.
She peeked across, and he offered a small smile then glanced away.
Too much looking at her would only lead to impossible things.
Aisling was dangerous. The more time he spent in her company, the more he could feel the boundaries of his good intentions to keep her at arm’s distance start to erode.
She was a fascinating mix of fearlessness and sweet charm, laughter and thoughtfulness.
He looked forward to their encounters, wondering if there’d be zest and provocation, or quietness and calm.
Yet she was good for him, whatever she said tugged at him, fueling courage, reminding him of who he used to be.
She was encouraging, positive, and he could feel himself falling as the strands of attraction wrapped around him.
Now, with mere hours before he’d leave, he wondered just what would happen next.
“So, what do you think you’d like to sing on your last night?” she asked.
“You mean as a solo or with you?”
“Either. Or.”
He shrugged. “I’m happy with most options for my solo. Whatever we do for the duet it’d be good if it’s not cheesy.”
“Oh, absolutely. I hate cheesiness in karaoke. Can you imagine such a thing?”
He laughed. “Okay, fine. I suppose I should have expected you’d make a comment like that. But hey, it would be good if it’s not completely cheesy.”
“Noted.” She grinned. “I’ll make sure it’s only moderately cheesy, then.”
“Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.”
Why was it so easy to talk with her, as if they had known each other forever, while with other women—Greta—conversations had ended up like drawing bad teeth? Full of painful moments, interspersed with moments of waiting for the suffering to end?
“Okay,” the emcee grasped the microphone. “Let’s give it up for the O’Leary family.”
Andy joined the enthusiastic applause for the band, his heart thudding as he wondered what would happen next.