Chapter 8 #2
“Damn us?” Sin sounded startled, his hand closing around my chin as he held me still. “Back up a little.”
“I’m a gold pack,” I choked out.
How come they didn’t know what that meant?
I felt alone, and my heat was coming.
I had to make them understand.
There was an odd silence, and I saw Sin exchange a look with Phantom, who’d got back to his feet, and was beside the set of drawers.
“If you…” I tried to find the words to make them see. “If you have sex with me, you’ll end up like… like Karma.”
Phantom cocked his head, sparing me a curious look.
“Let’s pretend I’m a heathen—” Sin cleared his throat—“and I have no idea what you’re talking about. Help me out.”
I wrung the blankets in my fist. “I’m not really… the best person to explain. But… but alphas can’t just go around willy-nilly fornicating with gold pack omegas or they’ll corrupt themselves.”
Sin stifled a cough.
“Corrupt?” Phantom, who was tugging a locked box from the bottom drawer, glanced up at me, disbelieving.
But… he could see it—right there. In his pack brother.
Would he ever wake up?
“Without a bond…” I went on. “It’s too risky.”
And those bonds had to be approved. Gold packs couldn’t just go and get with any old alphas. If my pack wasn’t pious enough, I could damn them even with the bond.
“A… what?” Sin asked.
“A bond.”
There was a long pause in which Phantom tugged off a necklace, upon which was a key.
“How old are you?”
“Twenty-two,” I replied.
“And that’s… your… lifestyle?” Sin asked.
Lifestyle?
I nodded, though it wasn’t how I’d put it.
It was just how the world worked.
“Uh. One small problem, babe,” Sin said, voice cautious. I swear I heard the first genuine waiver of uncertainty. “I don’t see any bond marks on your neck.”
“Of course not,” I replied, cupping the place Karma had just had his teeth. “I… I was never devout enough to be Chosen.”
Phantom’s eyes darted between us wildly for a moment as he set the box on the top of the set of drawers, lips parted as he stared at me. As if he were picking apart those words very slowly and carefully.
Then his aura exploded into the air, and absolute chaos broke loose.
Karma snarled, trying to detangle himself from us so he could launch himself at Phantom. Sin managed to grab him by the braid in time, dragging him back. I scrambled to adjust in Sin’s tight grip, terrified, clutching the blankets to my chest.
“What the fuck have you done?” Phantom hissed, closing the distance between us, bright eyes fixed on Sin for some reason. “She’s a fucking vir—?”
“Will you—!” Sin snarled, still grappling with Karma—“Shut your dumb fucking mouth!” Something silver flew from his hand, grazing Phantom in the thigh.
The knife clattered to the stone in the corner as Sin—with all his might, and me still tucked into one arm—shoved Karma back down.
“Calm down, you great fucking oaf!” he snarled, fist clamping down on Karma’s neck.
Panic was clogging my brain up.
Phantom was… was angry I was a virgin?
Why was he angry?
I couldn’t keep up.
My stomach twisted with another early heat pang and I whined. It was enough to make Sin, Karma and Phantom freeze.
“Give me the fucking meds!” Sin spat. “And how—how—is her sex life—” He hissed the words under his breath, “—my fucking fault?”
“Why is she in here?” Phantom looked ready to tear his hair out. “Why is she in Anarchy?”
“I don’t fucking know.”
But only one word stuck.
Meds?
It stopped me right at the edge of tumbling off the cliff entirely.
With a snarl, and one hand clamped on his wounded leg, Phantom opened the box and grabbed a small bottle that he tossed our way.
Sin caught it, dragging me and him back into the same sitting position we’d been in before. Karma’s chest was still heaving, and he threw Phantom a narrow-eyed glare, but he didn’t move, winding his arms back around both me and Sin this time.
“Here.” Sin unscrewed the top and pushed a pill into my palm. “To put off the heat. And I have clothes, too, but let’s just fix this first.”
I stared at the pill.
I used to dream of these meds. Trapped in my own room, desperately finding ways to survive the agony of my own body. It was as painful as it had to be for salvation…
This is wrong, a voice whispered. There was no penance in skipping a heat.
I’d used to suffer them, curled up and whining in pain for days, imagining… well.
…This.
I’d begged that if I suffered enough, maybe one day I'd be rewarded. Wrapped in the strong arms of an alpha who wanted me.
And now…
Now I was in the arms of two.
Two!
When I didn’t deserve it.
A weight settled over me.
A truth I hadn’t faced yet until this second.
There was no salvation for me anymore.
It was over.
With trembling fingers, I pressed the little pill beneath my tongue. The world was numb.
We all just waited in silence for a long time. Well. A kind of silence if you ignored the distant howls that were starting to grow into the patchwork of this place.
They were waiting for the pill to work, I realized.
My hormones must be ruining them all.
Phantom had stuffed the box back into its hiding place, and was now laying back on the bed, staring at the bunk above.
I think I was affecting him the worst. He seemed to already be losing his mind, as he was letting out occasional groans, running his fingers through his hair and muttering indistinguishable things to himself every minute or so.
Sometimes he threw the three of us dark looks.
I still didn’t know why he was so angry I was a virgin.
Was it a religious thing?
The Sisters used to tell us to be careful of hedonistic beliefs that made sacrifices of virgins, but if that was the case, shouldn’t he be glad?
At the third dark look, Sin replied with a silent, but very offensive hand gesture that I grabbed in shock and tried to stuff back down.
They really weren’t very nice to each other.
There was a spot of blood on Phantom’s leg from the knife Sin had thrown, though it didn’t seem to be growing.
“Are you… pack lead?” I whispered at last, daring a glance up at Sin. I needed to be so careful about bites now they knew we were mates.
These were alphas. They didn’t need to worry like I did. And they didn't understand what a threat I was, especially unchecked.
“No,” Sin replied.
“Oh.” I frowned, surprised.
Phantom was, then?
I peered at Phantom, but he shook his head. “Pack lead’s in a rut.” He thumbed toward the other door that I hadn’t seen opened. The one with the latch.
As if on cue, a loud thump made me jump this time.
It was the same as the ones I’d heard earlier.
My eyes went wide.
Another alpha? I almost let out another squeak of shock.
Four?
Four alphas to hold me?
No. No no no—you stupid, selfish, sinner.
But then… the scents in here were hard to parse out, but there could be four.
“He’s up?” Sin asked.
“Of course he’s fucking up. Karma’s like a bonfire in the bond.”
I frowned, watching as Phantom crossed the room toward the door. Then he slid the latch, revealing a window at head height.
I squinted, but all I could see from here were a few lines of metal. Then, with another thump, there was a flash of movement.
I still couldn’t make anything out.
“You… saved me without your pack lead’s permission?” I whispered.
Oh dear.
What would he say when he got out?
“Don’t worry,” Sin chuckled. “We do everything without our pack lead’s permission. You think Karma’s feral? Wait till you meet Vandle.”
Phantom took a step back, leaving the latch open. “He’ll be through it by the morning.”
At my side, Karma let out another low growl as Phantom settled back down on the bed.
“Karma… doesn’t like Phantom?” I asked.
“He likes me fine.” Phantom grunted. “He’s just territorial.”
“Then why is he okay with you?” I frowned up at Sin.
“Because,” Sin said, tugging me closer and drawing his chin over my temple, a possessive move that would have scent marked me if the dampeners weren’t still blocking his scent.
The burst of joy I felt over that might have stolen all my attention by itself if it wasn’t for his next words.
“There isn’t anything an alpha wants more in this world than to see his two omegas together. ”